Remember Even Angels Fall
by HJS-NS-23
Summary: Nathan and Haley are at a good place in their lives, what will happen when Nathan finds out she’s not prefect? Will he be there for her when she needs him most, or will he turn his back on her when her life’s in danger?
1. Tomorrow

**Authors Note-Okay so I'm really nervous posting this because although I have co-written stories before I have never actually written one by myself except for one shots. This story is something that just kinda came to me and I hope you enjoy it. I don't know how fast I will be in updating it because I am finishing up another story with a friend and I have a lot of reading being an English major. Anyways posting this is my birthday present to Hayley. Happy Birthday sweetie. I also want to thank everyone for their encouraging words and telling me I can do it. Thank you Steph, Hayley, Madison, Allison, Lisa and Sharon your words of encouragement while trying to write this first chapter. Enjoy and don't forget to leave a review if you want me to continue.**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own OTH unfortunately.

**Song:** Tomorrow by Avril Lavigne

**Quote:** "Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with." -- Mark Twain

* * *

"_No don't go please," _

__

Haley James begged the sandy, blonde, man who had his back turned to her. "Josh, I love you please don't go" Haley screamed the tears streaming down her face as she ran to try and catch up with the man.

"_You shouldn't have pushed me away then" Josh replied not turning around and suddenly disappearing._

"_Josh" Haley said looking around frantically for the man, but not seeing him anywhere. She dropped to her knees in the sand and cried._

"Brrrng" The alarm went off waking Haley up in a cold sweat as she relived another nightmare about Josh leaving her.

Throwing her blankets off she sat up and took a deep breath trying to calm herself before getting out of bed and shakily making her way to her bathroom. For the past week she had been having Josh nightmares, she wasn't sure what made them come. The anniversary of him leaving her or her starting a new job.

She undressed and jumped in the shower letting the steamy, hot water relax her before washing her hair and getting out, wrapping a towel around her and one around her hair. Walking to her closet she grabbed a black pencil straight skirt and an emerald green blouse and threw it on before running a comb through her hair and putting on minimal make-up. Looking at the clock she saw it was 7 am and went downstairs to grab a granola bar before getting into her car and driving to Tree Hill High.

Pulling into the parking lot she felt the butterflies swarming her stomach. _I can do this_ she told herself trying to relax and calm her own nerves. She got out of the car and walked to her new classroom her heels clicking on the tile. She had met with the principal at the beginning of summer and he told her all about the job and showed her, her classroom. She smiled as she walked into her classroom. _Its perfect_ she thought with a smile as she looked around it again. Even after she had spent most of the summer in there trying to make it look nice it felt better today because it was the first day of class.

Sitting at her desk and spacing out Haley jumped when she heard a knock on the door. "Come in" She told the person.

"Hello Ms. James how are you today?" Principal Turner asked with a smile.

"I'm doing good Mr. Turner" Haley replied politely.

"Good. Ready for your first day?" He asked her like he asked all new teachers.

"Yes I am very excited for class to begin. Thank you." Haley said smiling.

"Good now if you need anything just let me know," Mr. Turner told her walking away.

"Ok you can do this Haley," Haley said out loud.

"You do know talking to yourself is a sign of insanity," A curly blonde said walking into the room.

"Well why do you think I'm friends with you" Haley replied with a grin before getting up and hugging the blonde.

"Nice Hales, I feel loved," Peyton joked putting her hand over her heart.

Haley laughed. "Well I try. So are you nervous?" She asked curiously.

"Eh I just hope there are some good artists. What about you?" Peyton asked sitting down in a chair next to the teacher's desk.

"Petrified," Haley said laughing before turning serious. "I had another dream about Josh last night Peyt."

"Uh oh. What happened?" Peyton asked concerned.

"Same as always. He told me he loved me and then just disappeared. Peyton I haven't had this dream in a year! Why's it coming back?" Haley asked on the brink of tears.

"Haley you're stressed and its almost that time of the year, but we'll get through it together, like always," Peyton said wiping away a tear that escaped on Haley's cheek.

"Great I'm falling apart and my students are going to be coming soon," Haley said shaking her head with a sad smile and grabbing a Kleenex.

"How about we have ice cream and a movie night tonight?" Peyton asked knowing that they both needed a night away from everything.

"Sounds good. Isn't it your turn to pick out the movie?" Haley asked glad of the subject change.

"Yep so I'll see you at 7 at my house" Peyton said getting up.

"K bye good luck" Haley told her.

"You too" Peyton shouted walking out the door and to her art classroom.

A few minutes after Peyton left the bell rang signaling for students to get to their seats. Haley was anxious to begin. As the final bell rang and the students sat in their seats it was time to get class started.

"Hello class my name is Miss. James and I will be your teacher. This semester we are going to be studying poetry, Shakespeare and the American Dream to name a few. Does anyone have any questions?" Haley asked walking in front of the class with her head held high in a business tone.

"Yea teach do you have a boyfriend?" A cocky African American teenager asked with a smirk.

"I don't think that's any of your business Mr.?" Haley said looking at the young man and waiting for him to tell her his name.

"Fields. Quentin Fields and I guess that means no," the teenager replied raising his eyebrow as the class laughed at how flustered Haley was getting.

"Okay well if there aren't any questions about the class than lets get started shall we?" Haley inquired walking behind her desk and grabbing a stack of papers before handing them out. "This is a questionnaire so I can get to know you guys a little better." She told them before looking at the time and sitting down to fill out some left over paperwork.

"Maybe you can get to know me better tonight," Quentin said smugly looking Haley directly in her eyes.

"Mr. Fields would you like to go to the principals office on your first day of class?" Haley asked in a stern voice while trying to show no fear. Last year she had a student like this so she learned how to deal with them then.

"I want you to spank me Miss. James" Quentin said with a smirk and sticking out his butt.

"That's it" Haley said having enough of his attitude. She quickly reached into a desk drawer and pulled out a pad of paper before scribbling on it and handing it to Quentin. "To the principles office" she told him in a no nonsense voice.

"Don't worry Miss. James we'll be together before the end of the year" Quentin replied with a wink before strutting out of the classroom as the class just laughed.

"Now please finish your assignment" Haley told the class as she sat down again. _That kid is going to push my buttons all year_ Haley thought putting her head in her hand.

The class ended soon and a new batch of kids walked in and got the same assignment. This time there was no trying students, which Haley was grateful for. Pretty soon it was time for lunch and Haley made her way to Peyton's classroom with a stack of papers in her arms. Looking down at the top paper Haley laughed as she saw some kid wrote their favorite color was lemon yellow and not watching where she was going bumped into a stranger.

"Oh I'm sorry" Haley said looking up before gasping in surprise.


	2. Wish You Were

**Authors Note:** Hi everyone I just want to say thanks to the original Madackles, Jess2303, BLONDEMOMENT82192, naley19, laperkin, fricktard, BubblyGirl23, Hales luvs Nate, ScarsLeft2Remind, steffy2106, loverofnaley, RedRoom323 and impeccableblahs for the reviews they meant the world to me and I am so glad you all enjoyed the first chapter.

I want to especially thank Madison (Madackles) for being my beta and reading this over and to steffy2106 for supporting me with this chapter and to BubblyGirl23 for letting me bounce ideas off her! Also if you have any thoughts or ideas or songs let me know! Enjoy, don't forget to leave a review and maybe I will have another chapter up this weekend.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own OTH unfortunately or the song Wish You Were who belongs to Kate Voegel.

**Quote: Is Love At First Sight Real Or An Allusion?- Hayley (BubblyGirl23)**

* * *

_Chapter 2- Wish You Were_

_"Oh I'm sorry" Haley said looking up before gasping in surprise._

"Skills" Haley asked in disbelief before pulling the papers close to her chest and giving the man in front of her a one armed hug.

"Hey Ladybug. How are you?" Skills asked squeezing her tight.

"Ah better now. How have you been? I haven't seen you in what seems like forever! Are you teaching here?" She asked looking him up and down in the maroon dress shirt and black dress pants.

"Yea as a history teacher," Skills said chuckling at the look of astonishment on Haley's face.

"Wow," Haley said truly surprised. "I thought you went to Duke for basketball and the teaching degree was just a backup."

"Nah I decided I wanted something stable since I'm a uncle now" Skills said with a dazzling smile.

"Angela had a baby?" Haley asked her eyes widening in surprise.

"Yep a year ago. It's the cutest baby," Skills said gushing about his niece before clearing his throat and putting on a hard face on making Haley shake her head and laugh.

"You still talk to curly fry?" Skills asked.

"Yea she teaches here too," Haley chuckled thinking about how they all ended up teaching, and at the same school no less. _Well not everyone_ she reminded herself solemnly thinking about Josh.

"Well let's go see her!" Skills told her wrapping an arm around Haley and waiting for her to snap out of her daze and lead him to Peyton's classroom.

When they got there Peyton was sitting on the windowsill looking outside and sketching in a notebook.

"Yo curly fry get off your ass and come give your boy a hug," Skills said with a big smile as Haley swatted at him.

"No swearing baldy we're at school," Haley scolded as Peyton ran into Skill's awaiting arms.

"Its so good to see you. I've missed you!" Peyton told him.

"You too curly fry. It's been to long." He said.

"So where'd you find this one?" Peyton asked Haley while pointing in Skills direction.

"In the hall" Haley said with a smile.

"Ooh a lost puppy! Can we keep him Hales can we?" Peyton asked with begging eyes as Haley starting cracking up again.

"Nah we don't want him. He runs away and doesn't call," Haley said crossing her arms over her chest and pouting.

"Yo dawg you never called me either," He pointed accusingly while squinting his eyes.

"Fine…fine truce?" Haley asked sticking out her hand.

"Yea truce." Skills said shaking the outstretched hand.

"Hey we're having a movie night tonight why don't you come over?" Haley told him before looking at Peyton to make sure it was okay.

"Sure I ain't got no plans anyway." Skills said shrugging.

"It's I don't have any plans," Haley corrected as Peyton busted out laughing and Skills gave her a look of disbelief before shaking his head.

"Anyways what are ya dawgs up to right now?" Skills asked looking between the two.

"Uh we have lunch now" Peyton said.

"Why?" Haley asked curiously.

"I want you to meet my other friend whose teaching here," Skills told them.

"How many people do you know who teach here?" Peyton asked laughing.

"Uh right now 3 but you never know who your going to run into in these halls," Skills said.

"Ok lead the way," Haley said with a flick of her wrist as the trio made their way to the gym.

Going through the locker room they saw a door that said coach, which Skills rapped on before a sexy, masculine voice yelled, "Come in."

Skills walked in first followed by the girls. He walked over to the desk where a raven haired man was sitting wearing a light blue dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up and top two buttons undone, a white t-shirt poking through and bumped fists. Haley looked at the stranger and locked eyes as chocolate brown eyes met the icy blue orbs and the world around them disappeared seemed to disappear.

She could feel a blush creep onto her cheeks as her heart beat wildly in her chest.

Nathan couldn't tear his eyes away from the beautiful woman in front of him. _Wait did I just say a woman was beautiful? _He asked himself confused as he once again got lost seeing the swirling caramel in her eyes.

Peyton and Skills looked at each other before looking at the other two in the room confused. They were both still staring at each other, neither making a move nor saying a word.

"Dawg quit staring," Skills said breaking the two out of their trance and Peyton snickering as they both looked away. Haley quickly looked at the off white tiles on the floor while scolding herself. _Why did I let myself get lost in his eyes? Stupid girl, he's only going to hurt you,_ she thought.

_What kind of power does this woman have over me? She made me look like a freaking idiot,_ he thought shaking his head.

"Um ok this is awkward," Peyton said looking around the room and shifting uncomfortably.

"I'm Nathan Scott," the raven hair man said standing up and giving her his signature smirk.

"This is lady bug and curly fry," Skills said pointing to Haley then Peyton.

"Curly fry and lady bug?" Nathan asked raising an eyebrow and chuckling slightly.

"What Baldy means," Peyton said scowling before a smile broke out on her face is that I'm Peyton and she's Haley.

"Baldy huh?" Nathan asked with a smirk again and looked at Skills who was now rolling his eyes.

"Eh what can I say curly fry wants me but lady bug is fighting her for me."

"Psh you wish," Haley said finally feeling comfortable in the room and playfully swatting Skills.

"See she knows I love the abuse," Skills said making his eyebrows dance on his forehead.

"Gah your infuriating," Haley said throwing her hands up in the air and surrendering.

"Oh lady bug you know I'll always love you," Skills said wrapping an arm around her shoulders while Peyton looked on in mock hurt.

"Well jeez Skill's I sure feel the love now," She told him crossing her arms over her chest.

"You know you'll always be my curly fry" Skills told her twirling one of her curls before putting his arm around her.

Nathan just watched on, amusement showing in his eyes as he shook his head.

"You see Nate dawg they both want me. You know in college you might have gotten the girls but in high school it's all about the Skills." Skills said with a shit-eating grin as everyone else started laughing uncontrollably.

"I bet I could take either one away from you," Nathan said cockily after he stopped laughing and looking directly at Haley.

"Nah these two are mine," Skills said looking adoringly at both girls who rolled their eyes playfully.

Before Nathan could have a rebuttal the bell rang telling them their lunch break was over.

"Well I have to go Peyt I'll see you tonight, you too Skills. Nathan it was nice meeting you," Haley said waving before walking out of the office.

"You're having a threesome tonight how about I come over too since I know you wont be able to handle them both," Nathan said smugly.

"Maybe in your dreams Scott," Peyton said before bouncing out the door and shaking her head. _What a day its been and lunch only just ended_, she thought.

The rest of the day went by in a blur for everyone. As the ending bell rang for school Haley put everything away and went to the store to get snack food for later that evening.

Peyton went to the video shop and looked for a kid's movie that had no romance or death in it. _Hmm what can we watch?_ Peyton asked herself looking at the Disney movies in front of her.

"Little mermaid, Cinderella, Happy Feet… no romance" Peyton said reading off different titles. "Bambi, the Lion King, The Hunchback of Notre Dame …no death." _Jeez don't they have any movies without romance or death_ she wondered before spotting and grabbing 101 Dalmatians and walking to the check out.

* * *

Meanwhile Haley was unpacking groceries and couldn't get her mind off the events that had happened earlier. _I ran into Skills a childhood friend, had a nightmare about Josh and met a new man with the most intense blue eyes _she thought. _Why did I have that nightmare?_ She wondered frustrated before shaking her head and clearing the thoughts away and grabbing the popcorn out of the bag and setting it on the counter next to the extra popcorn butter and m&m's. Lost in her own world she almost didn't hear the door bell ring. Wiping her hands on the jeans she had changed into she walked to the door and opened it smiling when she saw it was Skills in a red polo and loose jeans.

"Hey Skills come on in" Haley said letting him in. She was just about to close the door when Peyton pushed it back open making Haley almost fall.

"Jeez Hales trying to keep me out?" Peyton asked with a grin.

"You bet bitch," Haley said laughing before skipping into the living room, Peyton and Skills trailing behind her.

"So curly fry you talk to Jake lately?" Skills asked not noticing how Haley tensed as Jake Jagelski was brought up.

"Not for about 2 years," Peyton said walking over to Haley and wrapping an arm around her friend.

"Right sorry lady bug" Skills said in an apologetic tone and looking down like a kid who just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Its okay Baldy its just that with Josh's thing coming up soon the name Jagelski just kinda puts me on edge," Haley told him shrugging out of Peyton's arm and giving Skills a small, sad, smile.

"Yea I'm sorry lady bug," Skills told her again.

"Did you get the snacks?" Peyton asked desperately trying to change the subject since the whole reason for movie night was to get Haley's mind off Josh.

"Yep m&m's, red vines for baldy, and of course popcorn with extra butter topping" Haley said with a smile.

"Awesome lady bug you remembered my red vines," Skills said doing a little dance of victory for his favorite candy as the other two busted out laughing at his dance moves.

"Ooh lets order pizza!" Peyton told them thinking of the thick crust covered in melty cheese and tomato sauce making her mouth water at the thought.

"Yea just no mushrooms!" Haley said scrunching her nose up in disgust at the thought of them.

"Ok what kind? Cheese, pepperoni or sausage?" Peyton asked.

"Sausage" Haley and Skills yelled together before laughing.

"Okay. Not ordering" Peyton shouted before they could make her.

"Not ordering" Skills mimicked.

"You guys suck," Haley said pouting and crossing her arms over her chest before marching over to the phone and dialing Blackwell's Pizzeria.

"Hi, delivery. Yes can I get 2 large cheese and sausage pizza?" Haley asked into the phone as Skills and Peyton sat on the couch and got comfortable. Okay thank you." Haley said before hanging up and glaring at the two on the couch.

"I hate ordering" Haley whined before falling in the middle of the couch.

"So curly fry what movie did you get?" Skills asked curiously.

"101 Dalmatians" Peyton said with a huge grin.

"Yes a Disney movie" Haley said giving Peyton a high five.

"Here Baldy put it in" Peyton said bossily throwing the bag to Skills.

"Jeez curly fry already ordering me around?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yep," Peyton replied with a smile.

"I kinda like it," He said winking.

"Ewww" Haley said as Skills put the movie in and grabbed the remote before sitting back down on the couch and pushing play. The three were deeply engrossed in the movie when the doorbell rang signaling the pizza was there.

"I'll get it" Haley said reaching to grab the remote and pausing it, taking the remote with her so that they couldn't play the movie without her.

"Come on lady bug," Skills whined like a two year old wanting the remote back.

"Yea Hales its not like you've never seen this!" Peyton added.

"Haha," Haley laughed and stuck out her tongue playfully before skipping to the door.

"So you know the anniversary is coming up right?" Skills whispered, the playfulness in the room leaving.

"Yea just don't bring up Josh, until she talks about him." Peyton said looking into Skills eyes pleading with him to comply.

"Aight but why haven't you talked to Jake?" He asked intrigued knowing the two were close until the thing with Josh happened.

"Its hard to talk with Josh's brother you know?" Peyton told him shrugging her shoulders.

"Yea," Skills said bowing his head down.

"Hi I have a delivery for a James," An average size guy with brown hair, and brown eyes asked with a lopsided grin while checking Haley out.

"Yea thanks," Haley said shifting uncomfortably and handing the guy the money.

"The names Tim Smith. I know you can't help but think how lucky you are that your getting some Tim time right? How about you invite me in and we can have this pizza. You can have some extra sausage," He told her while trying desperately to look cool and raising an eyebrow, a goofy and eager smile on his face.

Haley moved a hand to her mouth and tried not to laugh at this guys obvious bad pick up line. I think I'll just take the pizza," She told him grabbing the pizza boxes and closing the door, quickly locking it behind her before breaking out into a fit of laughter.

"Oh my god you guys. I just had the weirdest delivery guy. I actually felt sorry for him because I don't know how he could get a girlfriend with the pickup line he gave me," Haley said before trying to recite the line without bursting out in laughter. Peyton and Skills laughed so hard that Peyton had tears coming out of her eyes. The three friends ate the pizza and finished watching the movie with out any interruptions.

They turned on the TV after the movie was over and found old reruns of Boy Meets World, while eating popcorn.

"Oh I use to love watching this," Haley told the others.

"Yea I miss TGIF" Peyton said reminiscing about the past.

The three sat watching reruns until 11 when Haley noticed the time. "Alright I'm kicking you guys out," Haley said standing up. "It's already 11 and we have work tomorrow!"

"Ah man I hate being an adult," Skills pouting and standing up.

"Me too," Peyton agreed.

Skills started walking towards the door and Peyton hung back a little. "You going to be okay tonight Hales?" She asked concerned.

"Yea thanks movie night was just what I needed." Haley said giving the blonde a hug before walking her to the door.

"Bye Skills see you later. Bye Peyton see you tomorrow," Haley said before closing the door and locking it again.

Quickly throwing the pizza box away and running water in the popcorn bowl Haley made her way to her room and got changed into a pair of pajama pants and tank top before setting her alarm and crawling into bed. Closing her eyes she let the darkness engulf her until she felt someone looking at her. Opening her eyes she widened them in shock.

"Josh what are you doing here?" She asked nervously playing with her pinky ring and clutching the blankets close to her chest.


	3. I’ll Be Missing You

**Hey everyone I was driving in my car and heard some great songs and got inspired. I love the song this chapter is named after and I highly recommend it to everyone! Thank you so much for all the reviews! I love them and they defiantly help inspire me to write so please keep them coming. Thanks to Steph for being supportive and to Hayley for me constantly badgering her about a chapter or a song. Also thanks to Allison for help with songs too! P.S. this chapter is the longest I've ever written and I was going to make it into 2 but I thought I would be nice and leave it as one. Enjoy and don't forget to review. Also would you guys rather have Peyton be with Skills or Lucas? **

**Song:** I'll Be Missing You By P. Diddy.

**Quote:** "Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering." Ida Scott Taylor.

* * *

"Josh what are you doing here?" She asked nervously playing with her pinky ring and clutching the blankets close to her chest.

"Hi honeybee," Josh said affectionately as Haley smiled sadly at the nickname. _I haven't been called that in 3 years_ she thought sadly. Only Josh called her honeybee because in 3rd grade when they met she had honey blonde hair and told her she was annoying like a bee.

"You can't be here!" She told him sternly shaking her head as unshed tears burned at her eyes.

"Why not?" Josh asked playfully.

"Because you're... dead." She said, her own words hitting her like a ton of bricks, as she stared deep into his emerald eyes and tried to stop the tears that threatened to spill.

"Ah honeybee that doesn't mean I can't still see you. I also know you're barely living your life. I don't want my honeybee to be sad." Josh told her seriously.

"How can you think that I can just forget you?" Haley asked choking up, as all the emotions ran through her.

"Well you'll never forget me cause I'm just so memorable," Josh told her cockily. "But you also need to live your life and go out more."

"I miss you too much," Haley said letting a lone tear escape.

"Aww honeybee you've cried enough for the past three years to last you a lifetime. I promise I'll always be watching you."

"Even in the shower?" Haley asked a little worried.

"Oh definitely in the shower," Josh said with a grin.

"Pervert," Haley laughed wiping the tear away.

"Now what happened today when you met that guy?" Josh asked quirking an eyebrow up as Haley instantly blushed.

"Nothing," Haley denied playing with a loose string on her comforter.

"Bull shit," Josh said chuckling and folding his arms.

"At least he's better than that other loser you dated last year." Josh told her as Haley's mouth dropped open.

"He was a nice guy," Haley defended.

"Yea sure…" Josh trailed off as Haley flung a pillow at him, which missed him with her bad aim.

"Oh bite me," Haley said giving him a mock glare.

"Gladly," He told her chomping his teeth together.

"You're such a pervert I don't know how I ever dated you," She told with a small smile on her face.

"Ah that's because I was the only one who would date you," He told her laughing at her glare.

"Whatever. I think I was the one helping out the charity by dating you," She told him confidently.

"So any who that loser you dated last year was a total nerd honeybee," Josh said knowingly.

"He was not. He just wasn't a singer," Haley told him rolling her eyes.

"Hey singers are the best. Hell I'm one…or at least I was one," Josh said scrunching his nose in confusion.

"Sure they are," Haley said rolling her eyes and shaking her head trying to remind herself he was dead.

"So now why haven't you picked up your guitar in 3 years missy?" He asked arching an eyebrow.

"I…uh…you…grrr…" Haley yelled frustrated. "I will eventually," She told him stubbornly.

"Yea right and I'm a woman," He said making her laugh even more. "Honeybee you have to let the music back in."

"It's just hard…you know?" She asked him confused.

"I know but I also know its your dream to be a singer even if you've only ever sang because Peyton, Skills and I made you," He told her earnestly.

"Oh shut up. I can't help it you three eavesdropped all the time!" Haley told him pouting.

"And now I get to see and hear you all the time," Josh said putting his fingers together evilly.

"Jerk," Haley told him pouting.

"I'm glad your still best friends with Peyton," Josh told her seriously.

"Yea she really helped me a lot after losing you," Haley said looking down.

"Yea. I'm glad you ran into Skills again too," He told her.

"Yea I was surprised. Who would have thought we would all become teachers and all come to Tree Hill to teach." Haley said chuckling.

"Hey Charleston wasn't too bad" Josh said defending their hometown.

"Ehh," Said Haley with a shrug.

"You're lucky I'm dead so I can't tickle you," Josh told her sternly.

"Oh yea cause your tickling was the worst!" Haley told him sarcastically.

Josh just looked at her and stuck out his tongue.

"What are you two?" Haley asked trying to hold in a smile.

"What are you two?" Josh mocked before they both busted out laughing.

"I missed this. I miss you. Last time I saw you, you were leaving." Haley said pouting.

"Yea I need to finally say goodbye honeybee. I mean everyone up there thinks your boring since all you and Peyton do is stay home on Friday nights and watch movies," Josh told her dramatically.

"We are not boring!" Haley defended. "And I don't wanna say goodbye" Haley told him frowning.

"Honeybee I'll always be with you but you've held onto me for 3 years. Its time you live in the present instead of the past. Ida Scott Taylor said "Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering." Josh told her with a smile.

"Wow." Haley said impressed.

"Didn't know I was so smart did you?" He asked with a grin.

"No I guess not." Haley told him with a small smile.

"Goodbye honey bee. I'll always love you and I'll always watch over you." Josh said before fading into oblivion.

"Goodbye," Haley whispered into the room before her alarm rang waking her up.

_Wow_ Haley thought after slamming her alarm clock. _I feel better though _she pondered with a small smile before getting up and going into the shower. After she got out of the shower she threw on some black dress pants and a lavender shirt before blow-drying her hair and putting light makeup on.

Looking at the clock she noticed she didn't have to be to work for a half hour. She made her way to her closet and reached in the back of it for her old guitar. Pulling it out she made her way back to the bed and put the guitar case next to her. Biting her bottom lip she contemplated opening it. With shaking hands she unclasped the lock and opened it. Gently taking it out of the case she started strumming it. After changing and tightening the strings she started humming a song that came to her.

Seems like yesterday we used to rock the show  
I laced the track, you locked the flow  
So far from hangin on the block for dough  
Notorious, they got to know that  
Life ain't always what it seem to be (uh-uh)  
Words can't express what you mean to me

Haley sang playing the guitar, a small, sad smile on her face until she looked at the clock and realized she only had 10 minutes to get to Tree Hill High School. Putting her guitar in the case and locking it she put it back in her closet where she found it, and ran to the kitchen to grab a muffin before throwing on a pair of black heels and grabbing her stuff hurriedly making her way to her car and driving to school.

When she got to her classroom she was surprised to see Skills there waiting for her. "Hey baldy what are you doing here?" She asked curiously.

"Well since its Friday I wanted to see if you and curly fry wanted to hang out again," Skills told her.

"Umm I don't think we have plans I have to check with Peyton though. What were you thinking about us doing?" She asked intrigued.

"Well Nate asked if we wanted to meet him at Tric, which is a night club his ma owns with his brothers ma." Skills told her sitting on one of the students' desk.

"His brother has a different mom?" She asked surprised.

"Yea. Long story short Dan got Lucas' mom, Nate's brother knocked up at the end of senior year of high school, then decided he didn't want a kid, went to Duke met Nate's ma and knocked her up except this time he stuck around. The two moms met, became friends and now own two businesses together." Skills said before stopping and thinking to see if he missed anything.

"Woah," Haley said surprised by the drama in that family.

"Yea and that even the half of it," Skills said shaking his head.

"Um yea let me just talk to Peyt and make sure she wants to go," Haley said putting some papers into a pile.

"K call me. I programmed my number into your phone last night," Skills told her with a cheeky grin. "Besides I should be a good teacher and get there before my students," He added before leaving the room.

Haley shook her head before finishing up setting up for her classes. The morning flew by and before Haley knew it, it was lunch. She walked to Peyton's classroom and saw her friend at her desk listening to her I-pod. Walking up to her Haley gently poked Peyton making her jump as Haley started laughing at her friends reaction.

"Hey," Haley said when Peyton took the ear buds out.

"Hi. How were your classes so far?" Peyton asked.

"Good, Quentin wasn't in school today so I don't know whether I should be relieved or upset he didn't come." Haley told her chuckling softly.

"I don't know?" Peyton said shrugging her shoulders.

"What about your classes?" Haley asked.

"They went ok." Peyton told her.

"So baldy came and found me this morning." Haley said.

"Oh what did he want?" Peyton asked curiously.

"He wants us to go to this club called Tric." Haley told her.

"Hmmm that doesn't sound like a bad idea. I mean when was the last time we went out?" Peyton asked trying to think of the last time they went out on a Friday night.

"Seems like forever ago," Haley thought reminiscing how they used to always go to a club and dance.

"Lets go," Peyton said excitedly.

"Yeah," Haley agreed looking forward to dancing again.

"Okay so I'll come over after school tonight and help you get ready?" Peyton asked.

"Yea. See you then," Haley said before walking out.

After the final bell rang Peyton made her way to Haley's room and the two got into their cars and drove to Haley's. After making snacks they headed to Haley's room.

"Okay so what should you wear?" Peyton said looking through the closet. "Too boring, too old lady looking, ugly. Oooh what about this shirt with these jeans?" Peyton asked pulling out the gold glitter halter-top and blue skinny jeans.

"Perfect," Haley said before grabbing them. "So now do we have to go over to your house to find clothes or do you have any in the guest bedroom?" Haley asked.

"Umm I think I have something here," Peyton told her before walking out of the room and into the guest room.

Even though they lived separately Peyton kept clothes at Haley's in case they decided to go out or she stayed the night just like Haley did at her house. Looking in the closet she found a black tank top and a short denim skirt with a pair of her sketchers in the bottom of the closet. After grabbing the outfit she walking into the extra bathroom and jumped in the shower to get clean.

Haley made her way into the bathroom connected with her bedroom and got into the shower. She let the hot water fall on her as she thought about everything that had been happening lately.

The two got out of the shower and dressed before meeting back in Haley's bedroom and started doing their hair and make up. Peyton curled her hair as Haley blow-dried hers letting her short brown hair fall in natural waves.

"You think I should do smoky eyes or lightly?" Peyton contemplated looking at Haley, who was putting gold eye shadow on.

"Smokey eyes," Haley told her now applying mascara.

"Ok," Peyton said before finishing her makeup.

"So what do we want for supper?" Haley asked glancing at the clock.

"I saw this little café, lets go there," Peyton said putting her shoes on.

"Okay," Haley agreed throwing on a pair of gold flip-flops.

The two made their way to Karen's Café. "I like this place," Haley told Peyton approving of the little café.

"Me too. It reminds me of Mike's," Peyton said thinking fondly of the little diner they used to all go to.

They ordered food and made small talk as they ate. After paying the duo made their way to Tric.

When they got to Tric, it was packed. After finally making their way in they scanned the room looking for Skills.

"Oh look there he is," Peyton pointed out the man sitting with his back against the bar.

"Well lets go," Haley said holding onto Peyton's arm and dragging her over to the bar.

"Hey baldy," Haley said giving him a hug.

"Lady bug, curly fry you made it," Skills said happily.

"Yea and what the hell is this bullshit she gets a personal invite from you herself and I'm just an after thought?" Peyton asked before giving him a mock glare.

"Nah curly fry, but the bell was about to ring and you know I should probably be on time to class at least the first week." Skills told her wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"Yea yea," Peyton said rolling her eyes.

"I don't know why you two never dated," Haley told them interrupting the playful banter.

"Oh you know lady bug, curly fry here could never handle me," Skills said smugly.

"You wish," Peyton said with a small smile shaking her head.

"What can I get you ladies to drink?" Skills asked looking at the two.

"I'll have a jolly rancher," Haley told him.

"Um I'll have sex on the beach," Peyton said looking around the club.

"You know the beach isn't too far away," Skills said winking and making the two girls burst out laughing.

"The drink moron," Peyton said with a smile.

"I know but well…" Skills said trailing off.

"Goldilocks?" a raspy voice shouted as a brunette wearing a red halter-top screamed running over to the trio.

"B. Davis?" Peyton questioned giving the girl a hug as the two guys who were following Brooke finally made their way to the group.

"Omgosh let me look at you," Brooke said holding Peyton out in arms length while looking her up and down.

"Hey Skills," Nathan said bumping fist before looking back at Brooke and Peyton confused before his eyes found Haley watching the two in confusion also.

"Hey Blondie," Lucas said when Brooke held her out in arms length.

"Luke," Peyton whispered softly biting her lip before running into his arms. "I missed you," She breathed out softly.

"Both of you," she said before giving Brooke another hug.

"So how do you three know each other?" Skills asked completely confused. Nathan, Brooke and Lucas are grew up in Tree Hill so how could Peyton know them. The only reason he knew them was because he went to Duke with them.

"Oh I know Brooke from cheer camp. We went to the same cheer camp in the summer for a couple of years, and well Lukey here," Peyton said in a teasing tone "came to visit and we hung out a little together.

"I haven't heard from you in 2 years!" Brooke said scolding Peyton.

"I know I've just been busy," Peyton said giving a small sad smile to Haley.

_Yeah taking care of me_ Haley thought sadly. _Josh is right I need to get on with my life. Not just for my sake but for Peyton's too._

"This is Haley and Skills" Peyton told Brooke and Lucas. "Yea we know Skills we went to Duke with him." Lucas said.

"And Haley this is Brooke and Lucas." Peyton resumed the introductions.

"Oh this is the infamous Haley," Brooke said with a dazzling smile letting her dimples show.

"Um I guess," Haley said fidgeting.

"The one who took Mr. Waffles everywhere with her and beat up that little boy who tried stealing him right?" Brooke asked looking at the two as Haley's face blushed with the memory.

"Well he shouldn't have tried taking Mr. Waffles," Haley pouted, defending herself.

"Oh I almost forgot to introduce boy toy," Brooke said looking at Nathan who was laughing at Haley.

"Boy toy?" Haley asked confused.

"Nathan," Brooke said pointing at him.

"Oh we already met," Haley said biting her bottom lip to stop from grinning.

"Nice. Well I guess you would considering that he works at Tree Hill. Anyways lets go dancing," She ordered before pulling them onto the dance floor.

The girls were dancing and laughing as the guys looked on in lust at them shaking their hips.

"So B. Davis you and Luke dating?" Peyton questioned innocently.

"Nope," Brooke answered letting the music sway her.

"Hey guys if those are your girls why aren't you dancing with them?" The tall, dark and rugged bartender asked.

"Oh hey Owen how are you?" Lucas asked the new bartender.

"Good you?" He replied wiping the counter and getting the guys some shots.

"Good, but you know Nate can't dance and it's a lot better watching them then Nathan making a fool out of himself" Lucas said with a cheeky grin. The guys continued to talk to Owen until the girls finally came back and the group ordered a round of shots.

"Hey Hales why don't we sing tonight," Skills asked slightly tipsy as the guys had been doing shots and drinking beers as the girls were dancing, ready to pounce on anyone who tried touching them.

"Let me have some more shots," Haley told him shooting the shots down her throat for liquid courage. The two made their way to the DJ and asked if they could sing. The DJ agreed and asked what song since they had karaoke equipment set up for times like these.

Haley whispered the song as Skills admired her for picking this one out, both knowing it was a going to be an emotional duet.

Skills got up to the stage and grabbed a microphone as Haley grabbed the other one.

"Yeah... this right here... goes out to everyone who has lost someone they  
truly love," Skills told the club before singing.

Seems like yesterday we used to rock the show  
I laced the track, you locked the flow  
So far from hangin on the block for dough  
Notorious, they got to know that  
Life ain't always what it seem to be (uh-uh)  
Words can't express what you mean to me  
Even though you're gone, we still a team  
Through your family, I'll fulfill your dream (that's right)  
In the future, can't wait to see  
If you open up the gates for me  
Reminisce some time, the night they took my friend (uh-huh)  
Try to black it out, but it plays again  
When it's real, feelings hard to conceal  
Can't imagine all the pain I feel  
Give anything to hear half your breath (half your breath)  
I know you still living your life, after death

This time Haley started singing the chorus letting all her emotions over Josh's death take over.

Every step I take, every move I make  
Every single day, every time I pray  
I'll be missing you  
Thinkin of the days, when you went away  
What a life to take, what a bond to break  
I'll be missing you

Skills started singing the second verse.

I miss you Big  
It's kinda hard with you not around (yeah)  
Know you in heaven smilin down (eheh)  
Watchin us while we pray for you  
Every day we pray for you  
Til the day we meet again  
In my heart is where I'll keep you friend  
Memories give me the strength I need (uh-huh) to proceed  
Strength I need to believe  
My thoughts Big I just can't define (can't define)  
Wish I could turn back the hands of time  
Us in the 6, shop for new clothes and kicks  
You and me taking flicks  
Makin hits, stages they receive you on  
I still can't believe you're gone (can't believe you're gone)  
Give anything to hear half your breath (half your breath)  
I know you still living you're life, after death

Haley sang the tears threatening to fall as her angelic voice sang.

Every step I take, every move I make  
Every single day, every time I pray  
I'll be missing you  
Thinkin of the days, when you went away  
What a life to take, what a bond to break  
I'll be missing you

Somebody tell me why  
One Black Morning  
When this life is over  
I know  
I'll see your face

Skills sang, his voice sounding similar to P. Diddy's

Every night I pray, every step I take  
Every move I make, every single day  
Every night I pray, every step I take  
Skills Every day that passes  
Every move I make, every single day  
Skills Is a day that I get closer  
Skills To seeing you again  
Every night I pray, every step I take  
Skills We miss you Big... and we won't stop  
Every move I make, every single day  
Skills Cause we can't stop... that's right  
Every night I pray, every step I take  
Every move I make, every single day  
Skills We miss you Big

Haley sang the tears streaming down as she smiled thinking of how proud Josh would be of her.

Every step I take, every move I make  
Every single day, every time I pray  
I'll be missing you  
Thinkin of the day, when you went away  
What a life to take, what a bond to break  
I'll be missing you

Every step I take, every move I make  
Every single day, every time I pray  
I'll be missing you  
Thinkin of the day, when you went away  
What a life to take, what a bond to break  
I'll be missing you

Every step I take, every move I make  
Every single day, every time I pray  
I'll be missing you  
Thinkin of the day, when you went away  
What a life to take, what a bond to break  
I'll be missing you

The club roared with applause as the two made their way back to the group. "Wow Haley that was amazing." Peyton said giving her a hug.

"Thank you," Haley said blushing her liquid courage now gone.

"Skills you weren't too bad either," Peyton told him with a grin.

"Yea you know ladies love me for my muscles and my voice," He said wiggling his eyebrows as everyone laughed.

"So Haley you should come shopping with me and Peyton tomorrow," Brooke said excitedly clapping her hands together.

"Yea that sounds pretty cool," Haley told her with a smile.

"Oooh I love this song. Come on goldilocks, broody and skills," Brooke said leaving Nathan and Haley alone as they went to dance.

"They are so going to make a cute couple," Brooke whispered to the other 3 as they walked on the floor.

"You have an amazing voice," Nathan told her.

"Thanks," Haley whispered shyly a pink twinge filling her cheeks.

"So how long have you been teaching?" Nathan asked wanting to know more about this angel sitting across from him.

"2 years, I started right out of college. What about you?" She asked innocently.

"2 years ago also," Nathan told her.

"Cool," Haley said her head down and fiddling with her hands.

"I use to play basketball," Nathan blurted out trying to break the silence lingering around them.

"Cool were you any good?" Haley asked interested.

"The best" Nathan told her cockily.

Haley just smiled and rolled her eyes. "Cocky much?" She asked playfully letting her guard down a little

"When I have a right to be. Yeah." he smirked.

"You truly are something else Nathan Scott" Haley said shaking her head while smiling.

"I know," He told her with a smirk. "Do you wanna go out sometime? Like a date," Nathan asked nervously. _Why am I so nervous?_ He asked himself _oh yea cause I don't ask people out._ He sat there waiting for her response.


	4. This One's For The Girls

**HJS-NS-23-Hey everyone I just want to thank you all for your reviews they seriously mean the world to me! I named the first chapter and added a quote so check it out otherwise those are the only changes to it. As of right now it's a tie for who Peyton will be with so keep voting.**

**Also one of my best friends Steph, made a promo video for this story so check it out! The link is on my page and you can finally see what Josh looks like. I would love to hear your guesses as to who's at the door at the end of the chapter. Anyways enjoy and please don't forget to leave a review. Thanks to Hayley for all her help and for Steph making my video, love ya girlies.**

**Song:** This One's For The Girls by Martina McBride

**Quote:** "We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed. As in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last a drop which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses there is at last one which makes the heart run over."  
-- Samuel Johnson

* * *

"Not so cocky now are we?" Haley asked a playful gleam in her eyes.

Nathan was taken aback. No girl had ever had this effect on him.

"Come on Haley James what's the worst that can happen? You fall hopelessly in love with me?" He asked with a smirk.

"Maybe in your dreams," she spoke seductively biting her lower lip.

"Oh trust me they're your dreams and I don't disappoint," He replied cockily.

Haley sat there with her mouth slightly agape. No one had given her this type of playful banter in forever.

"Okay I'll go out with you, I've needed to catch up on my charity work for a while anyway." Haley said trying helplessly not to smile.

"Oh so now I'm a charity case?" Nathan asked sitting back in his chair and folding his hands over his chest with a slight pout on his face.

"Maybe," Haley grinned mischievously thinking his face was adorable with the pout.

"Well I'll take it." He told her before standing up and walking over to her side of the table, bending down so his face was level with hers. Haley sucked in a breath as she thought he was going to kiss her. Reaching past her he grabbed her cell phone lying next to her and pressed some buttons before taking out his and making sure the call had worked. "I'll call ya later with the details" He said before kissing her cheek, a tingle running down her spine at the contact.

"H. James what was that?" Peyton asked coming back over to the table and seeing her friend with a huge grin on her face as Brooke stood behind her.

"Nothing." Haley denied looking down at the table and drawing a circle with her finger avoiding the curious gazes Brooke and Peyton were giving her.

"Well I should head home," Haley said standing up and grabbing her cell phone and giving a fake yawn.

"Okay well me and goldilocks will pick you at 9 for our shopping trip. Go home, take aspirin and drink lots of water so you're fresh for tomorrow," Brooke told her sternly.

"Aye Aye captain" Haley mocked saluted before leaving the club and getting a cab.

Haley got home and threw on her pajamas before crawling into bed; looking at the clock she saw it was 12 am. Just as she was almost asleep her phone alerted her she had a new text message. Reaching over and grabbing it she shook her head after reading it. 'Sweet dreams of me Nate.'

'Don't get 2 excited thinking of me, Hales'

Nathan smirked as he got her response. _She's defiantly feisty_ he thought to himself. 'I'll pick u up at 7 4 r date twmr.'

Haley quickly read it. 'K c u then' she said before putting her phone back on the nightstand next to her bed and turning to sleep on her side.

* * *

"What about this?" Brooke asked as she came out of the dressing room in a tight red lacey top, showing off a fair amount of cleavage.

"Too slutty." Haley told her.

Brooke pursed her lips, "Slutty slutty or just slutty?" She asked and Peyton chimed in. "Slutty Slutty."

Brooke grinned at them, "I'll get it then." and walked back into the dressing room.

"Wow she's defiantly something else," Haley said with a smile as she browsed the sale rack.

"Yea but that's Brooke for you. I told you about her I just always called her B. Davis though," Peyton said reminding Haley.

"Oh yea the really big party girl at camp. Well your description was really accurate," Haley said with a cheeky grin.

"Uh huh," Peyton said pretending to be annoyed.

"Oh tutor girl," Brooke said coming out of the dressing room now back in the clothes she was wearing earlier.

"Who?" Haley asked confused.

"You, P. Sawyer told me you use to be a tutor in high school and college so now your nickname is tutor girl because I give everyone nicknames" Brooke said stating the obvious.

"Oh ok" Haley said shrugging it off.

"Anyways what happened between you and hot shot while we were on the dance floor?" Brooke asked while raising a perfectly arched eyebrow in excitement.

"What do you mean?" Haley asked pretending to play dumb.

"Oh no tutor girl you are not getting out of it that easily! I'm not naïve, I saw Nathan kiss your cheek" Brooke told her crossing her arms over her chest. "I wanna know what happened!" she said tapping her foot like a two year old.

"Oh I missed that," Peyton said pouting. "Come on Hales just tell us please!" Peyton begged.

"He might've asked me out," Haley mumbled turning around and going into the dressing room leaving an open mouthed Brooke. _Since when does Nathan hotshot Scott ask girls out?_ She thought bewildered. _This is big._

"Wait did you just say Nathan Scott asked you out?" Brooke asked incredulous following Haley into the dressing room.

"Maybe. Why?" Haley asked shrugging it off like it was no big deal_. If I pretend it's not a big deal then I wont have to deal with Peyton pestering me _she thought to herself_. _Suddenly her cell went off and Haley looked at it before a smile graced her face seeing it was Nathan. How's it going w/brooke?

'Good told her bout 2night' Haley sent back before Brooke started talking again.

"Nathan Scott doesn't ask people out! Oh my god when are you guys going on your date?" Brooke asked excitedly.

"Uh tonight at 7," Haley told her before trying on a blue dress shirt for work.

"Tonight at 7!" Brooke screeched turning heads in the dressing room.

"Yea," Haley said coming out of the dressing room and looking in the mirror.

Quickly looking at her watch Brooke shrieked again as Peyton laughed.

_Haley has no idea what she got herself into telling Brooke about this date_ she thought to herself remembering in summer camp when she was asked out and had to spend the whole day 'beautifying' herself.

"That only gives us…5 hours!" Brooke said throwing up her hands as Haley came back out dressed in her jeans and a t-shirt.

"Ok?" Haley said confused before her leg started tickling. _Stupid vibrating phone_ Haley thought with a smile.

"We have so much to do. Try this green halter and these jeans on!" Brooke ordered pushing her back into the dressing room while tapping her foot impatiently and waiting for Haley to come out.

'oh god poor u lol' Nathan wrote back to her when she saw what he wrote in the dressing room.

'yea tell me bout it. What u doin' Haley typed before putting her phone back on the bench and showing Brooke the outfit.

"Okay that looks good hurry up and put your other clothes back on." Brooke told her as Peyton chuckled on the side. "P. Sawyer why are you laughing we have so much to do to make her beautiful and only 5 hours to do it!

"Oh no what ever will we do?" Peyton asked sarcastically except Brooke didn't pick up on it and thought she was serious.

" I know right goldilocks!" Brooke said seriously.

"Umm guys I'm right here you know!" Haley said.

"Okay so now we have the outfit picked out we just need shoes and accessories," Brooke told them checking off the list in her head.

After an hour later of finding jewelry and the perfect shoes, a pair of strappy black heels the girls left for Haley's house. Peyton and Brooke had yet caught Haley and Nathan texting back and forth. After turning on the radio Brooke sent Haley to the showers so she could get clean.

"Don't forget to shave tutor girl," Brooke yelled after her as Peyton gave her a look of disbelief. "What you never know what's going to happen," Brooke said shrugging her shoulder innocently.

Shaking her head Peyton sat on the bed and started sketching while waiting for Haley to come out of the shower.

"So tell me Blondie what's been happening in your life," Brooke asked curiously.

"Nothing." Peyton answered and Brooke rolled her eyes.

"Nothing? What about with that guy, he called you... curly fry."

"Skills?" Peyton cut in with a laugh. "He's like mine and Haley's best friend, nothing more."

Brooke grinned at her, her dimples showing. "Whatever you say"

"What about you and Lucas?" Peyton rebutted.

"Were just friends like before," Brooke told her before standing at Haley's dresser and looking at all the pictures.

"Sure," Peyton drawled out with a smile.

"What are you guys doing?" Haley asked curiously coming out of the bathroom with a robe on.

"Oooh tutor girl sit your happy butt down and let Brooke Davis work her magic on you." Brooke ordered pushing Haley into the chair by the vanity.

"Is she always this bossy?" Haley called out to Peyton who was lying on the bed chuckling in amusement.

"Yes," Peyton answered before the girls saw Haley's phone vibrate on the dresser.

"Who been texting you?" Peyton asked curiously.

"No one," Haley said a blush creeping on her cheeks as Brooke did her hair.

"Oh I don't think it's no one," Brooke said before trying to reach for the phone.

Haley quickly reached up and grabbed the phone putting it to her lap as she flipped it open and read the new message from Nate. 'do I need to rescue u early?'

Haley smiled and bit her bottom lip before hitting reply. Quick like a rattlesnake Brooke yanked the phone out of Haley's hands and ran as Haley chased her around the room before plopping on the bed next to Peyton and reading the text message.

"Oooh its from Nathan," Brooke squealed before reading it. "That jerk!" She said showing it to Peyton who started laughing.

"Hmm I wonder what the other ones say…" Brooke said while reading them with Peyton as Haley struggled to get her phone back.

"Hey you should text him back," Peyton said planting the seed in Brooke's head.

"Ooooh great idea P. Sawyer! Hmm what should I write?" Brooke asked tapping her chin with her pointer finger before a devilish grin appeared on her face. "Oh I know," Brooke said as Haley struggled more to get her phone back. Quickly texting Brooke started laughing as Peyton read what she sent.

"What did you write?" Haley asked finally swiping her phone back. Opening the sent box her eyes almost popped out of her head. "Brooke" Haley yelled astonished. "You wrote 'I'm horny wanna help?'" Haley yelled embarrassed and furious.

Nathan chuckled when he got the message. _Brooke must've taken her phone_ he thought before replying. 'hi brooke'

Haley laughed at the message relieved. 'how'd u know brooke stole it?'

'ur earlier texts, & I know brooke,' he replied.

_What does he mean by I know Brooke?_ Haley thought jealously.

"Hey Brooke did you and Nathan ever date?" Haley asked trying to keep her voice calm and nonchalant.

"Oh ewww," Brooke said scrunching up her nose in disgust. "That would be like dating myself," she shuddered at the thought. "But I am pretty fine if I don't say so myself," She added flipping her hair.

"Why Hales a little jealous?" Peyton asked raising an eyebrow.

"Uh…no," Haley denied stuttering.

"Bull shit," Peyton said pointing her finger accusingly.

"Not uh," Haley denied sticking out her tongue before Brooke jumped up and ran to the radio. "I love this song," she declared before turning it up.

_This is for all you girls about thirteen  
High school can be so rough, can be so mean  
Hold onto, onto your innocence  
Stand your ground when everybody's giving in_

This one's for the girls

_This is for all you girls about twenty-five  
In little apartments just trying to get by  
Living on, on dreams and Spaghetti-Os  
Wondering where your life is gonna go_

Brooke sang off key and loudly before Peyton and Haley joined in.

_This one's for the girls  
Who've ever had a broken heart  
Who've wished upon a shooting star  
You're beautiful the way you are  
This one's for the girls  
Who love without holding back  
Who dream with everything they have  
All around the world  
This one's for the girls_

This time the girls were singing into brushes, a remote a remote, the curling iron and dancing around the room.

_This is for all you girls about forty-two  
Tossing pennies into the fountain of youth  
Every laugh, laugh line on your face  
Made you who you are today_

This one's for the girls  
Who've ever had a broken heart  
Who've wished upon a shooting star  
You're beautiful the way you are  
This one's for the girls  
Who love without holding back  
Who dream with everything they have  
All around the world  
This one's for the girls

Yeah we're all the same inside  
From one to ninety-nine

_This one's for the girls  
Who've ever had a broken heart  
Who've wished upon a shooting star  
You're beautiful the way you are  
This one's for the girls  
Who love without holding back  
Who dream with everything they have  
All around the world  
This one's for the girls_

"Oh my God tutor girl we shouldn't be dancing around we don't have your hair done, your make up done and your not dressed yet," Brooke shrieked in a high-pitched shrill tone.

After Brooke finally got Haley's hair dried and curl she started to do her make-up.

She brushed her lids with golden dust and accented it with emerald green showing off Haley's eyes, before applying a light pink gloss over her lips. After her make-up was done she walked into the bathroom and changed out of the robe into the emerald green halter shirt and jeans.

"Wow tutor girl you look bitchin'," Brooke exclaimed pleased with her work.

"Yea Hales, Nathan's going to freak when he sees you" Peyton added with a smile. A blush crept on her face at her friend's words. As she sat down on the bed to put her shoes on the doorbell rang.

"Oh crap he's on time" Haley exclaimed with butterflies in her stomach.

"I'll get it," Brooke said excitedly running down the stairs before the other two could stop her. Opening the door a look of confusion adorned her face. "Your not Nathan," she stated confused.

"I'm looking for a Haley James or a Peyton Sawyer," a deep voice boomed authortively.

"Um Hales, Peyton someone's at the door for you," Brooke yelled up the stairs while eyeing the visitor curiously. At the top of the stairs Peyton saw who it was and ran down them to give the stranger a tight hug. "What're you doing here?" she asked breathlessly.


	5. Crush

**HJS-NS-23- I'm so sorry for the delay! I had so many issues writing this chapter and nothing seemed like it was good enough for you guys. Thank you to Hayley for making sure I kept working and telling me not to give up and for helping me at certain parts where I would get stuck! Also I want to thank Steph for encouraging me. Don't forget to check out the promo video on my profile if you haven't already.**

**Anyways thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and I hope you guys enjoy this one and please leave a review because they make my night! **

**Song:** Crush by Mandy Moore

**Quote:** The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people much more strongly than even the final surrender; because this kiss already has within it that surrender.  
-Emil Ludwig

* * *

"Um Hales, Peyton, someone's at the door for you," Brooke yelled up the stairs. At the top of the stairs Peyton saw who it was and ran down to them and gave the stranger a tight hug. "What're you doing here?" she asked surprise evident in her voice.

"What a guy can't come and see his baby sister?" the tall, dark man asked with a straight face.

"Derek," Haley screamed pushing Peyton out of the way to give him a hug. "I missed you. I didn't know you were on leave yet." Haley told him.

"Yea the Marines let me ship out early so I decided to surprise you, although someone looks like they're going out," Derek said surprised while looking at Haley.

"Who's the guy?" He asked furrowing his eyebrows together and crossing his arms over his chest.

"No one," Haley said slightly nervous of Derek's over protectiveness._ I don't want him to scare Nathan away_ she thought to herself.

"Uh huh," Derek said giving her a hard look while waiting for her to crack because he knew she was lying.

"I'm Brooke Davis," Brooke said checking the marine out with her signature-dimpled smile.

"Well why don't we just move this little party inside?" Haley asked with a fake grin while ushering everyone into the living room.

Right when she went to the door she saw a black SUV pull up. _Shit _she thought glancing between the SUV and Derek. Nathan got out and walked to the door.

"Hi," he told her while handing her a small bouquet of little purple wildflowers.

"Hi," Haley said sheepishly as she took the flowers, memorized by his sapphire blue eyes. "I'll be right back, let me go put these in some water." She said leaving Nathan standing at the door and going to the kitchen.

Seeing Haley leave the front door, Derek sneaked out of the living room where Brooke and Peyton were talking and saw a tall, dark haired man with a blue dress shirt and jeans standing at the door.

"Derek Sommers and you are?" Derek asked sizing the man in front of him up.

"Nathan Scott," the dark haired man said holding out his hand for the other to shake.

"So you're taking my baby sisters best friend out?" He asked inquisitively.

"Yea." Nathan said not scared of the man in front of him and looking him right in the eye.

Haley noticed Derek in the doorway. _Shit _she thought before running to protect Nathan from Derek's overprotective ways.

"So Nathan you ready?" She asked with a smile before turning to Derek and glaring at him. "I'll see you later," she said pushing Nathan out the door.

Nathan walked to the passenger side of his SUV and opened the door for Haley as Derek watched on making sure this one took care of Haley.

"Thank you," Haley said as Nathan shut the door before going around and climbing into the drivers seat. The ride to the restaurant was silent before Nathan spoke up.

"So that was Peyton's brother?" he asked curiously.

"Yea," Haley said fiddling with her hands. "So where you taking me?" She asked curiously.

"Ah that's for me to know and for you to find out," He told her with his Nathan Scott signature smirk as the laughter bubbled out of her throat. "Smooth," she told him shaking her head.

He just looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Be nice James," he told her sternly.

"Or what?" Haley asked teasingly.

"Or I might have to teach you a lesson." He said with a smirk.

"What if I want you to teach me a lesson?" Haley asked seductively arching an eyebrow.

Nathan's eyes widened slightly, and his mouth opened and closed a few times like a goldfish, as he was stunned into silence. He wasn't expecting that. But he wasn't complaining either. Who knew sweet Haley James had a sexy side? Well he certainly did, since that first time she'd walked into his office he'd been attracted to her. But she also had this innocence about her, which he loved. He then grinned and replied. "Well then I might just have to."

"Lucky me," Haley flirted back with a smile on her face.

"I would say so," Nathan told her glancing over at the faint blush that was spreading over her cheeks before looking at the road again.

The rest of the ride was spent in a comfortable silence, before the car came to a stop. When they got to the restaurant Haley was surprised as the waiter led them to a table outside by the docks. _This place is really nice_ she thought looking around at the small intimate restaurant.

The waiter pulled out their chairs for them as they sat down and handed them a menu. Haley pursed her lips together as Nathan let out a chuckle watching her eyes scan the menu_. I don't know what it is but there's just something about this woman_ he thought to himself as a genuine smile graced his face.

"So what are you going to get?" He asked curiously.

"Hmmm I'm thinking Mac and Cheese," Haley said with a grin.

Nathan just looked at her in shock before he chuckled. "Isn't that for five year olds?"

"Hey! Mac and cheese is food of the Gods." She retorted with a smile on her face.

"Yeah if the God are five year olds," he teased as she started laughing.

"What are you getting?" Haley asked curiously.

"Actual adult food" He taunted her.

"What Nathan Scott's an adult? Who knew?" She teased.

"Hey, I'll have you know I've being an adult for a long time." Nathan responded.

"Oh really you sure fooled me, and here I was thinking your mom still dressed you," Haley said biting her lip.

"Your evil! Yet you look so innocent," Nathan told her with a smirk.

"Well you know what they say," Haley said before licking her lips "Looks can be deceiving."

Nathan felt his lower region spring to life at her words and before he could say anything back the waiter came to take their orders. After placing their orders Nathan decided he wanted to get to know Haley better.

"So why did you become a teacher?" He asked her curiously.

"Well I used to tutor in high school and watching someone get it, like when that light went on, it just felt really good to know I helped with that. You know? So when I went to Stanford I decided to go into teaching," Haley told him with a far off look on her face. Nathan just stared at her beauty radiating against the soft glow of the lamp on the table.

"So how did you go into teaching gym and coaching the ravens?" She asked him taking the conversation off her and onto him.

"Well I've played basketball my whole life. I'm surprised you've never heard of the great Nathan Scott," he told her with a smirk.

"God you're cocky," Haley said shaking her head. "So why aren't you playing pro?" She asked scrunching her eyebrows in confusion. _If he's as good as he said he is why's he coaching,_ she wondered.

"In college I found out I had a heart condition called HCM," he told her looking down so he wouldn't see the pity in her eyes. _I can't believe I told her that great job dumbass, _he scolded himself. _Now she's going to think you want her to feel sorry for you. I can't believe I told her that I don't tell anybody that_ he thought to himself.

"Wow, Nathan I'm sorry." Haley said softly, placing her hand on top of his. She felt a jolt of electricity shoot threw her at the contact and looking up into his eyes she knew he felt it too.

"I'm afraid of clowns," She blurted out, before giving him a shy smile.

Nathan just sat there and laughed. Before he could say anything their food came. They ate in a comfortable silence stealing glances at each other throughout the meal.

"You ready?" Nathan asked after the check had come.

"Yea." Haley said taking the napkin off her lap and putting it on her plate before standing up.

They walked outside as a light breeze billowed in the air.

"So tell me more about you." Nathan told her.

"Well what do you want to know?" Haley asked curiously.

"So how hot do you think I am?" Nathan asked in a cocky smirk.

"Oh god here comes the ego again," Haley said shaking her head and playfully slapping him.

"No how about how you ended up in Tree Hill," He asked her seriously.

"I grew up in charlotte with Peyton and Skills and two years ago someone I know died and I needed to get away from all the memories. Plus my grandpa used to coach here." She told him with a small smile.

By this time they had found an empty table on the docks and sat down. "Who's your grandpa?" He asked trying to figure out if he knew him.

"Whitey Durham," Haley said with a huge smile thinking of all the stories her Grandpa used to tell her.

Nathan's face was one of shock and Haley just laughed at his reaction.

_How can someone so sweet and innocent be related to him?_ He thought perplexed.

"He's really sweet!" Haley defended.

"Yea I know I thought he was the sweetest person I have ever met," Nathan bit back sarcastically.

Haley sent him a glare pretending to be mad but couldn't stop the sides of her lips twitching at how cute he looked right then. "Anyways… what's your favorite place?" Haley asked in curiosity.

"How about I show you?" He asked before she nodded her head and they started walking again. He slowly reached over and grabbed her hand interlacing their fingers before giving her a nervous smile. Gently squeezing his hand Haley smiled back.

When they arrived at their destination Haley looked at him confused. It was a basketball court that ran next to a river.

"So this is your happy place?" Haley asked raising an eyebrow before Nathan started laughing. Haley looked at him confused until the light bulb went on and her widened slapping a hand over her mouth. "That's not what I meant," she chastised.

"Well you're my happy place now Hales," He said with a smirk as a light blush crept up her cheeks and she looked away.

"Wanna play?" He asked grabbing the basketball hidden underneath the bleachers.

"No I suck" Haley told him before a shit eating grin appeared on his face. "I might have to witness that," he said winking at her.

"You're something else Nathan Scott," Haley said shaking her head and chuckling. _I'll have to watch what I say around him from now on,_ she thought to herself.

"I meant I suck at basketball. Geez I guess I know where your mind is," She said rolling her eyes with a faint smile.

"What can I say?" Nathan asked shrugging and giving her a genuine smile.

Haley cleared her throat. "So emm, why did you bring me here?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" Nathan asked curiously.

"Why is this your happy place?" She inquired.

"I learned about this place from Lucas. We grew up hating each other. Our dad got his mom pregnant and bailed, met my mom in college knocked her up and then they got married we moved here. My dad at an early age pushed me into basketball. Our sophomore year of high school Lucas joined the basketball team and Brooke being Brooke pushed the two of us into becoming friends because she wanted us to be brothers. Just Brooke intruding into my life" He said with a laugh.

"Sounds like Brooke," Haley said smiling.

"Anyways we became friends and the three of us started hanging out. Of course my dad didn't like it, which only fueled me and Luke becoming closer." Nathan finished with a smirk. "We used to come here and play everyday," He told her looking at the old basketball hoop.

"Wow," Haley said looking at him in shock. "You definitely have a interesting family history," she teased with a smile.

"And that's only half of it," He told her chuckling. "I can't believe I told you all that. It feels like I've known you longer than a week," he told her seriously.

"Yea I know the feeling," Haley said with a smile and locking eyes with him.

"So do you have a favorite place in Tree Hill yet?" He asked.

"Yea," She said quietly looking down and breaking the eye contact.

"Show me," He requested standing up before standing in front of her and holding out his hand for her to take.

"Okay," she said placing her hand in his and standing up. He led her back to the docks so she knew where they were and let her lead the way. She led him to the beach, as the gentle breeze that was blowing earlier mixed in with the salt of the ocean. Haley slipped her heels off before stepping in the warm sand and letting it squish between her toes.

"So why the beach?" Nathan asked quizzically.

"The water calms me. No matter how bad my life got if I went for a swim then somehow it was magically all better." She told him with a smile, her heels dangling in one hand and his intertwined with hers with the other one.

"You wanna go for a swim?" Nathan asked raising his eyebrows up.

"I don't have a swimsuit," Haley said shaking her head.

"So?" Nathan asked like it wasn't a big deal.

"I'm not that easy sheesh," Haley said shaking her head and laughing at the pout that now shone on his face.

"Can't blame a guy for trying," Nathan told her shrugging his shoulders.

"Come on, there's a better view," she said pulling him to an excluded part of the beach where you could see the sun setting and little purple flowers grew much like the ones he had given her earlier.

When they got to the middle Haley plopped down in the sand and looked up to Nathan with her innocent brown eyes shining in amusement. "Come sit with me" She ordered patting the spot next to her.

He sat down next to her as they watched the sun set behind the water, the comfortable silence engulfing them.

"So..." Nathan said a few minutes later.

"Applesauce?" Haley said with a grin as Nathan stared at her confused.

"Ok?" he said scratching the side of his head in confusion.

"Nothing," Haley waved off laughing.

"You are a very random girl Haley James," Nathan told her with a smile.

"Thanks" Haley said with a smile. They sat at talked for a little longer under the stars before Haley looked at her watch and saw it was already 12 am. _Wow I've been with him for 5 hours?_ Haley thought. _It doesn't feel like it's been that long_.

"I should be getting back soon," Haley said looking over at him.

"What time is it?" Nathan asked before checking his watch. "Oh wow I didn't realize it was that late come on," He said standing up and giving her his hand again. He pulled her up and she fell into his chest. She locked eyes and felt a rush go through her as his eyes pierced her.

Nathan looked at her before slowly dipping his head down. Just as he was about to place a kiss on her lips a big, fat, raindrop plopped on the back of his neck and made him look up. It had started sprinkling. Pulling her with him they ran to the docks where the car was before it started raining cats and dogs. As soon as they got in the car it started pouring.

"Guess we made good timing," Haley said with a smile.

"Yea," Nathan agreed.

_Although I wouldn't mind seeing you all wet _they both thought simultaneously.

The rest of car ride was silent except the radio playing softly and before they knew it they were at Haley's house. He pulled into her driveway and ran to the passenger side of the door and opened it before walking Haley to her door. Haley fiddled with keys before giving him a shy smile. "I had a great time," She told him sincerely.

"Me too," He agreed before giving her a kiss on the cheek and turned around to walk back to his car.

Haley felt her body hum and warm as she placed a hand where he kissed her. Biting her lip she contemplated going after him. "Nathan," She yelled over the pounding rain before he opened the door.

"Yea?" He asked turning around as the water splashed on him and soaked his clothes making the blue dress shirt he was wearing cling to his muscles.

Haley ran to him and gave him a hug, not carrying about the rain that was falling around them. "Thank you," she said looking up at him.

Looking into her eyes as the rain descended around them he suddenly bent his head down and captured her lips with his, shocking her before she wrapped her arms around his neck and pushing herself closer to him. He ran his tongue along the seam of her lips silently asking for permission. Letting all the self-doubts and everything else fall away she opened her mouth letting his tongue enter, as they explored each other's mouths.

Pulling away Haley looked up at him before everything came back to her and she ran into her house leaving a speechless Nathan behind. "What the hell just happened?" He asked himself confused.


	6. Hold You In My Arms

**HJS-NS-23-This chapter focuses on Peyton and Haley's friendship and shows more about their past. I really hope you guys enjoy and thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter. Please don't forget to review. They seriously make my day and don't forget to check out my new one shot called a night after theraphy which is an extented Naley scene from epsiode 513. Enjoy. **

**Song:** Hold You In My Arms by Ray LaMontagne

**Quote:** If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me. -Unknown

* * *

_Pulling away Haley looked up at him before everything came back to her and she ran into her house leaving a speechless Nathan behind. "What the hell just happened?" He asked himself confused._

Haley ran to her house and wretched the door open before slamming it and panting heavily, her back flush against the door. The tears started to fall before she harshly brushed them away and slid against the door pulling her knees to her chest and burying her head between them.

_What have I done_ she thought in shame. _I can't believe I kissed him._

Peyton decided to stay at Haley's to see how her date had gone while Brooke and Derek had gone out. _Those two really seemed to hit it off_ she thought with a smile. Peyton had been sitting in the living room watching reruns of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air when she heard the door slam shut. She sat and waited for Haley to find her when after 10 minutes had passed, she still hadn't seen her. Scrunching her eyebrows into confusion she set off on a quest to see if her best friend was indeed home or if it was just her imagination.

Walking into the hallway her heart broke seeing Haley sitting against the door quietly sobbing. She looked so small amd broken. Peyton hated seeing her cry. It was especially hard after Josh died. _I really thought she would have had fun tonight,_ she thought before sitting next to her. Haley didn't say anything and Peyton just wrapped her arms around her and held her as she cried. She knew that when Haley was ready she would talk.

5 minutes had passed when a small voice finally spoke. "I…I kissed him," She looked up her brown eyes bloodshot and cheeks tearstained.

Peyton looked at her confused. _Why would Haley be crying if she kissed him_ she wondered to herself before it clicked. Haley hasn't really dated anyone since Josh died.

"Haley do you have feelings for Nathan?" Peyton asked making Haley look at her.

"Yes," she whispered so softly Peyton almost didn't hear her. "I…kissed him and I felt more in that kiss than I ever did with Josh," Haley said guiltily looking up into Peyton's smiling eyes.

"Haley what you and Josh had was great, but he's not here now and if he was," she told her tipping her chin up and looking into her eyes. "He'd want you to be happy and I know Nathan makes you happy."

"How do you know?" Haley asked stubbornly.

"Because I have never seen your eyes light up the way they do when you see Nathan or talk about him. Plus you're one who doesn't go around kissing guys on the first date," Peyton said knocking their foreheads together as Haley chuckled.

"I'm scared," Haley confided, her fears showing in her eyes.

"Life is full of choices and decisions. Do you want to look back in 10 years and wonder what if? Josh would want you to be happy." Peyton said trying not to cry. "Him and Jake always said if something happened to the other then to take care of us. Jake told me before we broke up and moved here that no matter what happens he'll always love me, but the same applies to you and Josh. No matter what happens Haley Rebecca James, Josh will always love you. But you need to move on with your life. He's prolly up in heaven making fun of us knowing him about how pathetic our love lives are," Peyton said making Haley chuckle.

"Have you ever thought about how our lives would be different if Josh hadn't died?" Haley asked staring off into space.

"Somedays" Peyton answered honestly. You and Josh would probably be engaged if not married and I would probably be with Jake still. But we probably wouldn't have seen Skills and started teaching in Tree Hill though. I think everything in life happens for a reason." Peyton said in deep thought.

"You know right before the accident Josh gave me a promise ring and I was going to break up with him. I loved him. I mean he was my first kiss, my first love, one of my best friends, but I wasn't in love with him anymore." Haley said opening up and surprising Peyton.

"I…I didn't know you were going to break up with him." Peyton said looking confused.

"Yea…I loved him I always will, but maybe him dying was my punishment. Like fate's way of saying well you were going to break up with him so we'll take him away permanently," Haley said starting to cry again.

"Haley his death wasn't your fault! It was the hit and run driver who was probably drunk. Don't feel guilty for living your life okay?" Peyton asked wiping away a tear.

"Yea," Haley said nodding her head.

"Now tell me about your date," Peyton said with a cheeky grin as Haley blushed and smiled.

"Okay, but can we get off this hard floor I think my butts going to be bruised from sitting here so long," Haley said as Peyton started laughing.

"Okay," Peyton agreed standing up and holding her hand out for Haley to take so she could pull her off the floor.

"Now lets get you in some pajama's, I'll find the ice cream and we can talk about your date and how everything went with Derek," Peyton told her as Haley made her way up the stairs.

"Hey Peyt thanks for always being there," Haley told her honestly before walking up the stairs.

"You're the only one whose never left me," Peyton whispered to no one.

Haley went upstairs and found her mint green pajama pants that had rubber ducky's on them, before finding a white tank top and putting them on. She searched for a ponytail holder and finally found one on her dresser and threw her hair up into a messy bun while walking in her bathroom and looking at herself. She grabbed a washcloth and wiped away the smeared mascara before making her way downstairs and into the living room where she knew Peyton would be waiting.

"So what kind of Ben and Jerry's did you grab?" Haley asked biting her lip.

"I grabbed you karamel sutra and I took the mint chocolate chunk one," Peyton said handing her a spoon and a carton.

"Chocolate, caramel and fudge chips fix everything," Haley said with a smile while taking a spoonful of the ice cream.

"Nah I like this flavor better." Peyton said as Haley rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue.

"Real mature Hales! Now what happened on your date with Nathan?" She asked raising her eyebrows in curiosity.

"Okay well first he took me to this really nice restaurant by the docks and we just talked and it was so weird I just felt totally comfortable with him, which of course scares the hell out of me, but we really opened up to each other. You know my Grandpa used to coach him? Oh wow," Haley said trailing off.

"What?" Peyton asked genuinely intrigued. "You remember how Grandpa always complained about Scott?" Haley asked furrowing her eyebrows.

"Yea?" Peyton asked still not catching on.

"He was talking about Nathan Scott," Haley said laughing finally putting two and two together. Peyton joined in the laughter.

"Oh Whitey is going to love his granddaughter dating Nathan Scott," Peyton told her with devilish gleam.

"You wouldn't tell him," Haley said narrowing her eyes.

"Wanna bet?" Peyton asked flailing her spoon around.

"If you do I'll tell him that you and Jake had sex in his house!" Haley said with a satisfied grin on her face.

"You wouldn't," Peyton said now glaring at Haley and gauging if she would.

"Wanna bet," Haley mocked.

"Truce?" Peyton asked hopefully.

"Ehh...Truce," Haley replied not wanting to hear the lecture from her grandfather about Nathan Scott.

"But dude that so wasn't my fault. We were house sitting and the boys came over. I couldn't help it I was in the shower and you and Josh were making out so he searched for me," Peyton pouted before remember how good of a shower it turned out to be, a huge smile now forming on her face.

"Eww Peyton stop thinking about that," Haley said grimacing and then lightly smacking Peyton on the arm.

"Ok so after dinner what did you guys do?" Peyton asked taking another bite of ice cream and changing the subject back to the date.

"Smooth," Haley said with a smile. "After dinner we went and sat on a table by the docks and we talked about our favorite places and he showed me this basketball court and explained the significance about it and it seemed really peaceful there. You know? And by the way you didn't tell me how messed up their family life is." Haley said jokingly poking her friend.

"Ehh," Peyton said waving her hand around. "What else?" she asked wanting to know what happened.

"Well then we went to the beach cause that's my favorite spot and we sat there and talked about everything and watched the sun go down.

"Ah very romantic Haley James," Peyton said grinning.

Then it started raining so we ran back to the car and drove here. He walked me to the door like a perfect gentleman and kissed my cheek. And I just thought I want a hug so I told him to stop and so he stood by his car and by this time it was pouring of course and I ran up to him and gave him a hug and said thank you. Next thing I know he's kissing me, and boy can that boy kiss," Haley said closing her eyes and imaging the kiss. "Then I was a idiot." Haley said looking down in shame.

"Why?" Peyton asked nervously.

"Cause I felt really bad for kissing him so I ran away and came into the house and fell on the floor sobbing," Haley said awkwardly.

"Haley James," Peyton chastised.

"Well I felt guilty for kissing Nathan when I still love Josh and he's not here to enjoy his life, and yet here I was out with this great guy and I kissed him on the first date and I felt more in that one kiss then I ever did with Josh, which and I don't know it scares me, and makes me feel guilty like I was somehow forgetting Josh," Haley rambled.

"Haley I don't care how many times I have to tell you this, but you can never forget Josh he will always be in your heart, but its about time you were really happy." Peyton said looking at her.

"Your right," Haley said biting her lip and nodding. "I guess I should call him tomorrow huh?" She asked scrunching her nose.

"Yea unless you already scared him off in which case he's mine!" Peyton joked.

"HAHA blondie you're so funny," Haley said rolling her eyes.

"I know," Peyton told her seriously before busting out laughing.

"So what movie do you want to watch?" she asked knowing they would stay up and watch a movie instead of sleeping.

"I could do with some butt kicking. How about Elektra?" Haley asked while glancing at the movies.

"Sure," Peyton said getting up to put it in.

"Speaking of butt kicking what's our favorite marine doing home?" Haley asked raising an eyebrow.

"Well he's on leave for a little while so he wanted to spend some time with us, but him and Brooke really hit it off," Peyton said smiling.

"So they're on a date right now?" Haley asked confused.

"Yep. That Brooke Davis sure moves fast," Peyton said chuckling as Haley started laughing along.

Peyton pushed play as the movie started and they watch Jennifer Gardner kick ass.

* * *

Nathan got back in his car confused and drove to the one person who could make sense of what the hell just happened.

He pulled up to the house and knocked on the black door before entering not even waiting to be invited in.

"Luke," He yelled into the bedroom looking for his brother.

"Whats up?" Lucas asked coming from the hallway to see Nathan standing there with his arms folded against his chest. "Didn't you have your date tonight?" He asked curiously.

"Yea, but see the thing is that I dropped her off and walked her to her door before giving her a kiss on the cheek," Nathan started but then was cut off by Lucas.

"Well aren't you the romantic?" Lucas teased.

"Shut up, anyways then when I was walking away she called my name then ran to me and gave me a hug and so I kissed her and she kissed me back before running back to her house and slamming the door." Nathan told him.

"Dude are you crazy?" Lucas asked throwing his hands up in the air.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Nathan asked confused.

"You went on one date and kissed her. I can tell she's not one to usually kiss on the first date and you probably scared her," Lucas told him knowingly.

"Are you sure you're not gay?" Nathan asked with a smirk.

Lucas punched Nathan in the arm and glared at him. "Wow you're so funny! Here I am helping you and you say that." Lucas said in mock hurt.

"So what should I do all wise one?" Nathan asked sarcastically.

Ignoring the sarcasm Lucas contemplated before speaking. "Go over to her house tomorrow and just talk to her man."

"Okay you're right I guess," Nathan conceded. "Although sometimes I wonder about your masculinity." He said raising his hands in the air and backing away with a smirk.

"Shut up," Lucas said glaring at him.

"NBA live?" Nathan asked curiously. "Maybe you can earn back some of your masculinity," He added with a cheeky grin.

"Fine," Lucas said rolling his eyes before throwing the controller at Nathan and purposely making it hit his head.

"Dude," Nathan said rubbing his head and glowered at Lucas who had a grin.

"What? You should have caught it. Not that it could do much damage anyways, hitting you in the head." Lucas said with a grin.

"HAHA you're so funny," Nathan said before rolling his eyes.

The two boys stayed up until 3 am playing NBA live before they both passed out. When Nathan woke up it was about 11 so he decided to go see Haley and talk to her. He looked at Lucas who was lying on his bed sleeping peacefully.

"Jerk making me sleep on the floor," Nathan mumbled before leaving the room and making sure to slam the door to wake Lucas up.

* * *

Haley was cleaning the house and folding the blankets when the doorbell rang. _I wonder who that could be_, she thought before placing the folded blanket on the couch and making her way to the door. She was surprised when she saw Nathan standing there in a pair of jeans and a blue t-shirt.

"Hey I think we need to talk," he told her.

"I think you're right," Haley said nervously, biting her lip before leading him inside.


	7. Are You Gonna Be My Girl?

**HJS-NS-23- Ok so instead of working on the many papers that I have due I decided to write an update instead lol. Special thanks to Hayley and Steph for their help with this chapter when I got stuck! Thanks for everyone trying to help me find a quote for this chapter too because it would have been up Wednesday if I could have found one lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I will try to update the next time I have a chance. Thanks for everyone who reviewed the last chapter and I hope you enjoy this one. Please don't kill me for this one either, I know you guys aren't going to be happy at the end. Don't forget to leave a review they help calm me down with all the stress I'm going through right now ;o). **

**Song: **Are You Gonna Be My Girl by The Jets.

**Quote: **"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

-Mark Twain.

* * *

Haley led Nathan in the kitchen trying to get her thoughts together so she could explain to Nathan why she ran off. She knew that's why he was here, for an explanation. _Okay just stay calm and tell him only the basics. What if he wants a relationship? Do I really want a relationship now? Is it too soon? Well it has been 3 years_, Haley contemplated biting her lip and pacing the floor in deep thought.

"Sooo," Nathan said shifting on his feet as he watched her pacing.

"Why did you kiss me?" Haley blurted out stopping to look at him with her big brown doe eyes.

"…Uh what?" Nathan asked slightly taken aback from the question.

"Why did you kiss me?" Haley persisted. _If he did it just to see what it would be like than I wont have to tell him about Josh, but if he likes me than I kinda owe it to him to tell him. oh my gosh this is so confusing! _Haley thought running her fingers through her hair before going back to pacing.

"Because I wanted to," Nathan told her frowning. _Where is she going with this?_ He asked himself confused.

_Son of a bitch I have to tell him. Right? I mean that's the right thing to do i guess... why can't I just have a normal_ _past,_ Haley pouted, as Nathan looked even more confused as to why she was pouting. "Okay I need to know if you like me," Haley said looking straight at him with her arms folded across her chest.

Nathan sat there flabbergasted. _What the hell is up with this girl?_ He wondered to himself. _Of course I like her why else would I kiss her?_ He thought frustrated running a hand through his black, unruly hair. "Yes I like you now what the hell is going on?" He asked impatiently and sleep deprived. _Stupid Lucas wanting to stay up all night playing video games._

Haley started pacing back and forth before she knew it the words were just spilling from her lips. "I used to be in a relationship, with my best friend." Haley started out.

"You used to date Peyton?" Nathan asked with a smile while raising an eyebrow trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere surrounding them.

"No you perv," Haley said stopping to shake her head at him while letting a slight chuckle escape.

"Well I didn't know for sure. Continue," Nathan told her as Haley started pacing again.

"As I was saying I used to be in a relationship with my best friend, his name was Josh and I loved him, but on the day that he was going to propose he was involved in a hit and run. They found the ring in his pocket, that's how I know. This happened 3 years ago. If you want a relationship with me, which I'm not saying you do, you need to know this because I feel blamed for his death. When you kissed me last night I got scared. I haven't really dated anyone since he died and I guess…I guess I'm just scared." Haley told him as she stopped pacing.

Nathan stood up and walked to her. "I do like you and I do want to be in a relationship with you but," Nathan said.

"But what?" Haley asked uneasily as butterflies started forming in her stomach anxious of his next words.

"But I've never actually been in a stable relationship, so we'll have to work at this together," he told her resting his forehead against hers and giving her a genuine smile.

"I don't know Nathan." Haley said, closing her eyes and turning away from him starting to walk away.

"You can't run away I know you like me just as much and you're just scared," Nathan said grabbing her arm and twirling her around and crashing his lips on hers before she pulled away breathlessly.

"You shouldn't have done that," She told him earnestly trying to catch her breath and staring up into his baby blues.

"I wanted to," he said looking down at her nervously awaiting her reaction.

She closed her eyes before running her hands through her hair. _I like him and he likes me_ she thought before smiling. "Yea," she said before throwing her arms around him and kissing him again.

--

"Hi Uncle Keith," Lucas said walking into the kitchen. After Nathan left, the asshole he is slammed the door waking Lucas up from another dream of the curly blonde that had been in his head for the past 5 years.

"How'd last night go?" Keith asked scrambling the eggs in the pan.

"I chickened out and stayed home," Lucas said sitting at the table and putting his head in his hand before letting out a huge yawn.

"Dumbass how is she ever going to know you like her if you never show her or tell her?" Keith asked shaking his head while smiling.

"Shut up! How long did it take you to tell my mom you loved her?" Lucas asked trying to quiet the older man.

"Exactly! You should learn from my mistakes," Keith said putting some cheese over the eggs and putting them on a blue plate.

"For me?" Lucas asked hopeful.

"You can't make your own breakfast?" Keith asked raising an eyebrow.

"Come on I need my strength if I'm going to talk to Peyton today." Lucas told him pleading for the scrambled eggs.

"Baby," Keith said before going back to the stove and making himself more eggs.

After the eggs were done Keith sat at the table and the two ate in silence as Lucas thought about how he was going to tell Peyton he liked her and Keith thought back to when he finally had the guts 5 years ago to tell Karen he loved her.

--

Rolling over Brooke snuggled closer to the warm body beside her. "Mhmm," She moaned pressing closer to the man. She looked up at his face and smiled as she saw his green eyes watching her.

"How long have you been awake?" Brooke asked before stretching.

"Since 7," Derek told her wrapping his arm around her tighter.

"Why didn't you wake me?" Brooke questioned looking at him.

"Well I figured I'd let you sleep and then maybe we could continue last nights activities." He said while raising an eyebrow.

"I like the way you think Marine Boy," Brooke said before straddling him and pressing her lips against his as his hands came to grip her hips.

Their tongues battled for dominance as Brooke's hair draped around their faces and she grounded her hips against his evident arousal. The thin sheet falling off them before he thrusted up into her and she raked her nails into his shoulders as he pumped in and out of her. All that could be heard was the heavy panting and moaning before Brooke's screams of ecstasy came as she felt her orgasm come followed by a deep groan from Derek as he followed her over the edge.

Brooke rolled off him and onto her side of the bed as Derek's arm caught her around the waist and pulled her back to him.

"So I'm guessing you don't get that kind of a work out with the marines," Brooke said cheekily trying to avoid the bigger question.

"No," Derek said laughing.

"So..." Brooke said a few seconds later. "What is this?" She blurted out before she could stop herself.

"I like you Brooke I do but…" Derek said looking at her.

"Uh oh there's always a but isn't there?" Brooke asked hurt laced in her voice.

"But I'm in the marines and I don't want to hold you back because in two weeks I have to leave again." He told her miserably.

"I really like you," Brooke told him.

"I really like you too Brooke Davis." He told her brushing a piece of hair out of her eyes.

"Then why don't we see how these next two weeks go and we can decide then?" Brooke questioned.

"You read my mind," Derek said before capturing her lips with his, their tongues dueling for possession of the others mouth.

--

Peyton was sitting below the old bridge below the highway watching the river flow and thinking about everything, especially Jake and how things ended between them. Ever since Haley talked about the past last night and how they would've been if Josh lived Peyton couldn't help but remember the day Jake broke up with her.

_Flashback:_

"_Hey" Peyton said happily when she saw Jake before racing to give him a hug. It had been a week since Josh's funeral and she was just so happy that Jake was still with her even though she missed Josh terribly. _

"_We need to talk," He told her somberly before leading her to a bench and sitting down._

"_What's wrong?" Peyton asked worried, gently stroking his cheek. She had been with Haley for the last week so she hadn't seen Jake knowing that right now he needed to spend time with his family._

_"I think we should break up," He blurted out as a sharp pain stabbed Peyton's heart._

_"Wh…what?" Peyton asked wounded._

_"Peyton I love you and I always will but…" Jake trailed off closing his eyes. I did something and I can't take it back he thought sadly._

_"If you love me and I love you then why can't we be together?" Peyton yelled hurt standing up and trying to fight the tears from falling._

_"PEYTON I JUST LOST MY FUCKING BROTHER! QUIT BEING A DRAMA QUEEN," he shouted at her and the knife that had been stabbed in Peyton's heart earlier forced itself deeper with those words causing more pain._

_"YOU KNOW WHAT! YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO LOST SOMEBODY JAKE! WHAT ABOUT HALEY, JOHN AND ME! WE ALL LOST SOMEBODY!" Peyton yelled back before her voice got deathly low. "But you know what? Fine if you want to stand here and wallow in self-pity and push me away then fine. People always leave right?" She asked before walking away. Right when she got by her car she turned around. "I just never thought you'd be someone who left," she added before getting in her black comet and driving away while Jake hung his head in guilt and shame_.

_END Flashback_

The tears cascading down her cheeks as she sketched a figure that had tears running down the face and in the eyes were a picture of a casket and Jake. No one knew how harsh her breakup with Jake had been. When Haley asked Peyton what happened she lied. She told her that they decided to end things mutually because of Josh's death and how Jake wanted to deal with the stress of it alone. If Haley would have known what had gone down she wouldn't have been able to deal with Josh's death and probably kicked Jake's ass knowing Peyton's history.

_I really hope everything works out with Nathan and that the talk goes ok. He seems like a good guy_ she thought to herself.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Lucas asked sitting down next to her before noticing her tear stained face. "Are you ok?" He asked concerned.

"There not worth that much," Peyton said slamming her sketch book shut so he couldn't see the drawing before wiping the tears away. "What's up?" She asked placing a fake smile on her face.

"Of course they're are probably worth more since you like to keep things in right?" Lucas asked her seriously. "So how do you like teaching at Tree Hill?" He asked wanting to get her mind off whatever thoughts made her so sad.

"Its…interesting," Peyton said choosing her words carefully. "What about you? Brooke told me you were writing a book." Peyton said nudging him playfully.

"Yea it's going…. kinda got stuck for awhile, but I just recently got more inspiration so hopefully it will be done soon. As of right now I'm helping Nathan coach the ravens. With any luck we might have a championship team." He told her.

"Luke that's great," Peyton said genuinely smiling. "What's the book about?" She asked intrigued.

"You'll have to wait until it comes out," He told her mischievously while looking deep into her emerald eyes. Peyton involuntarily shivered as it felt like he was staring into her soul.

"Peyton…" Lucas started before he took a deep breath.

"Luke what's wrong? You can tell me anything," She said anxiously while rubbing a soothing hand over his strong back.

"I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go out with me sometime…" Lucas mumbled.

"What did you say?" Peyton asked having barely heard him.

"Will you go out with me?" He asked a little more confident and looking up at her.

Peyton just sat there shocked and completely blindsided by the proposal.

--

"So," Haley said breaking away from the feel of Nathan's lips. "If we're going to do this then I want to take things slow," She told him biting her lip and hoping he would understand her apprehension.

"That works for me," He told her sincerely. "So Haley James would you like to go get coffee with me?" He asked with a smirk.

"Hmm I suppose I could," Haley said teasingly. The drive in Nathan's car was silent so Nathan flicked on the radio enveloping the two in the lyrics before Haley started singing along to the chorus.

_Big black boots,  
long brown hair,  
she's so sweet  
with her get back stare._

Well I could see,  
you home with me,  
but you were with another man, yea!  
I know we,  
ain't got much to say,  
before I let you get away, yea!  
I said, are you gonna be my girl?

Haley was bopping her head around and singing letting the carefree side of her out. Normally she would never be this open around someone knew but with Nathan she felt free. Nathan looked over at the passenger side and smiled as he saw Haley dance and sing with the music a huge grin on his face as he joined in singing with her.

The two made their way into Karen's café to get coffee and then go to the docks. "Hi Karen," Nathan said when they got to the counter of the café.

"Nathan how are you doing?" Karen asked in a warm motherly tone.

"I'm doing good," Nathan told while smiling. "Can we please get two coffees to go?" He asked the older woman while Haley just stood next to him smiling politely. Karen looked Haley over once before smiling and going to pour the coffee into two to go cups and placing a lid on each of them.

"Here you go," Karen said smiling while handing them both the coffee.

"How much?" Nathan asked taking out his wallet.

"Now Nathan you know I don't except money from you. You're my family," Her warm voice said before she walked away and went to go wait on a table. Noticing her back was turned Nathan ran behind the counter and put 15 dollars next to the register where Karen would see it.

"She's going to kill me when she sees it," Nathan said grinning before handing Haley a coffee as she chuckled softly and took her hand leading her to the docks. He led her to the same table they sat at last night. "Want some cracker jacks?" Nathan asked pulling the box from his jeans pocket.

"When did you get those?" Haley asked confused.

"I'm a magician too," Nathan said cheekily as Haley looked at him in disbelief before rolling her eyes playfully. "Fine I left them at the café last time I was there with Luke after hours behind the counter so I grabbed it. It's the breakfast of champions," he told her with a straight face as she laughed at his boyish humor.

"If you say so. And you made fun of me about Mac and cheese," she said playfully glaring.

Nathan ripped open the box before digging in for the prize. "You know I always loved the prize the most." He confided before pulling out the little package,

"Last time I got a tattoo with a random number," Haley told him.

Nathan quickly ripped the little prize package eagerly only to reveal a multi-colored bracelet. Looking at Haley and then back at the bracelet again he let his instincts take over. "Don't say I never gave you anything," He told her slipping it on her left wrist and smiling at her as a warm blush crept up her cheeks and she looked away.

A few minutes passed before Nathan took her hand making Haley look at him quizzically. "Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked nervously afraid of her reaction.

--

Peyton was waiting at her house for Brooke to show up when the doorbell rang. When she got back from the bridge she had texted her she needed to see her now. She rushed to the door thinking it was Brooke. "Oh my gosh I need to talk to you," She said whipping the door open before a look of surprise came over her face. "Skills what are you doing here?" She asked wracking her brain if she had made plans with the dark boy in front of her.

"Okay listen curly fry I'm gonna be straight with you aight?" Skills told her standing in the doorway.

"Sure," Peyton said crossing her arms over her chest and looking at him trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

"You know..." started Skills shrugging. "You ain't with a dude now and well...I liked you for a long time, maybe we should get together one of these days to see if its worth a shot...what d'ya say," Skills asked.

Peyton just looked at him in disbelief. Here was a guy she had known all her life and he was asking her out. _I never saw that one coming_ she thought. Before she had a time to respond Brooke came running up the driveway.

"P. Sawyer I need to talk to you!" She yelled. _Saved by Brooke_ she thought happily.

"We'll talk about this later," Peyton said pushing Skills out the door as Brooke walked in and closed the door. Taking a deep breath they both bursted out their news.

"I slept with your brother," Brooke rushed out as Peyton blurted, "Lucas and Skills both asked me out."

"You slept with my brother?" Peyton asked incredulity.

"Lucas and Skills both asked you out? What did you say?" Brooke questioned putting a hand on her hip.


	8. This Kiss

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone sorry its been so long for an update but I've been so busy with writing final papers! 7 papers in like 2 weeks! Any who I should be updating next week sometime. I hope you enjoy. Thanks to Allie, Hayley, Madison and Steph for helping me with this chapter, you guys are awesome! Also thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and I hope you enjoy this one and review! :o)**

**Song**: This Kiss by Faith Hill

**Quote**: Kissing is a means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other.-Rene Yasenek

1 Month later

Haley was walking to her classroom from Peyton's when she remember she had to go see Nathan and passed by before a hand shot out of the door to her classroom and pulled her inside. Before she could scream she felt a pair of lips crash on hers and a tongue running over her bottom lip asking for entrance. Opening her mouth his tongue darted in and quickly started massaging against hers, his rough hands cupping her face, before going to squeeze her ass pressing their bodies closer together. Forgetting where she was Haley lost herself in the kiss wrapping her arms around his neck and moaning at the tingles she felt go through her body.

Suddenly Haley remembered where she was and pushed the body away from her. "We can't do this here," She whispered shouted to the raven-haired man smirking at her.

"We just did," Nathan told smartly before giving her another chaste kiss. "All right, I'll kiss ya later," He told her giving her a kiss on the forehead before leaving, leaving her breathless.

Haley leaned back against the wall taking deep breaths to try and regain her breathing to normal and make sure when she tried walking to her desk her legs wouldn't give out. His kisses turned her into jelly. She thought about the day on the docks a month ago and a huge smile came to her face.

_Flashback:_

_A few minutes passed before Nathan took her hand making Haley look at him quizzically. "Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked nervously._

_Haley looked in his eyes and saw his nerves and smiled before squeezing his hand gently with hers. "I'd love too," Haley said smiling as she saw his eyes light up in happiness and relief. _

"_You won't regret it," He told her honestly leaning over to kiss her as she met him in the middle._

"_Can we keep this between us though? For just a little while. I don't want everyone to make a big deal about it" Haley begged while biting her lower lip nervously._

"_Sure, but that doesn't mean I don't get to kiss you right?" Nathan asked smirking._

"_Hmmm I guess you don't," Haley said teasingly and laughed when she saw his face fall. "Well at least when we're in front of the others," She added before leaning to kiss him again._

End Flashback

For the past month the duo had spent as much time together as possible without anyone catching on, or so they believed, but one of their friends had caught the looks between the two and were just waiting until they would admit something was going on.

Haley sat at her desk and thought of the broody blonde she had just visited. It seemed like her friend was closing herself off again and she didn't know why. Brooke was becoming one of Haley's best friends and although she couldn't keep up shopping with the bouncy brunette she was getting better than when she first started.

--

Peyton walked around the room looking at the artwork her students had been working on. She stopped on a picture of a man mountain climbing and how it reflected her life. She was climbing up this huge mountain and kept stumbling and falling. She was so deep in thought she didn't notice the man leaning against the door transfixed on her beauty.

"Hey," He drawled out jerking her out of her thoughts as she snapped her head to meet those intense blue eyes.

"What are you doing here?" She stuttered trying to find a way to get out of talking to him. She had successfully avoided being alone with him for the past month and now he was here and she had no preplanned escape.

"I think we need to talk about what happened at the bridge don't you?" Lucas asked crossing his arms across his chest and staring at her.

"You know right now really isn't the time," Peyton said trying to walk out the door before Lucas gently grabbed her elbow and pulled her back in the classroom shutting the door and standing in front of it.

"What happened at the bridge blondie?" Lucas asked endearingly.

_Flashback:_

"_I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go out sometime with me…" Lucas mumbled._

"_What did you say?" Peyton asked having barely heard him._

"_Will you go out with me?" He asked a little more confident._

"Oh" Peyton said completely blindsided by the proposal. "Luke I like you too" Peyton told him after a minute of silence as Lucas' eyes lit up in happiness. "But I can't be in a relationship now I'm sorry," Peyton added before picking up her notebook and standing up leaning down to brush her lips gently against his before the tears started falling again and she ran to her car. People always leave I can't let my heart get broken again she thought turning on the radio.

End Flashback

Peyton stood there and closed her eyes. "I think we should just be friends for now Luke I don't have time for a relationship I'm sorry," Peyton said reaching for the doorknob again. Lucas grabbed her hand and before she could protest his lips were on hers.

He prodded the seam of her lips for entrance and without thinking she granted him access as his tongue dueled with hers. His kisses were passionate and feverish, scared that she was going to pull back again. He kissed her until he couldn't breath and then pulled back as he watched her open her eyes. Lust, confusion, happiness and fear swirled in the green pools as he held her gaze. "You don't have to be scared with me," Lucas told her before kissing her forehead and leaving her there breathless and confused.

_Think about that, _he thought with a grin as he walked down the hall and to the coaching office. _I know you're scared, but I'm going to break down that wall._ He added walking into the locker room and seeing Nathan watching old Le Sal games.

"How are they?" Lucas asked motioning to the tapes that Nathan was watching.

"They're good, but I'm just watching the old tapes to strategize and see how we can win." Nathan told him pausing the tape. The two sat in their office trying to see how they could win the first game of the season.

--

Brooke was sitting in her office and tapping her pen on the desk when her assistant knocked on her door.

"Come in," Brooke's raspy voice yelled.

"Miss. Davis, do you have the sketches done yet?" The timid woman asked looking at the brunette expectantly.

"Yea here," Brooke said passing over a stack of papers before going back to tapping her pen. "Millicent if you were writing to a guy you liked would you start with dear or just his name?" Brooke asked curiously.

_Flashback:_

_It was the day that Brooke and Derek had been dreading. Today Derek was getting in an army truck and going back to the military base before shipping out to Iraq._

"_I'm going to miss you," Brooke said giving him a hug good bye as they saw the truck pull up._

"_I'll miss you too," Derek said brushing a tear away from her face. "But I'm expecting some letters ok?" he asked._

"_Don't worry your letters are just going to wish you were with me," Brooke said cheekily as Derek just shook his head before smiling._

"_Good bye Brooke Davis," Derek said kissing her forehead before hoisting his duffel bag and moving on to give Peyton and Haley a hug bye._

"_Bye Derek, be safe." Peyton told him._

"_I always am," He told her seriously. "I have a baby sister I need to protect. But do me a favor, I know about the whole Lucas and Skills thing and remember __you can't live in fear. Life is about taking risks. Not being afraid to go after what you want ok?" He told her._

"_Yea," Peyton said nodding her head as she went to wrap an arm around Brooke and they saw him throw his duffel in the truck and getting in waving to the three girls who all had tears in their eyes._

_End flashback_

Brooke moved her fingers to her forehead remembering all the sensations that one forehead kiss gave her.

"I would start with his name, dear just sounds to formal," Millicent said breaking Brooke's thoughts.

"Thanks Millie," Brooke said giving her signature dimpled smile as she started writing Derek's letter.

--

"Hey girly fry," Skills said walking into the teachers lounge.

"Hi Skills," Peyton said quickly putting the lid on her coffee and walking to go out the door.

"What do you want Skills?" Peyton asked curiously trying to get out of the room.

"Well I kinda need help finding a costume for Brooke's party and you're going to be the girl to help me find it." Skills told her blocking the door. _Great another guy to block the door from me _she thought.

"I would love to but..." Peyton started to say trying to come up with an excuse, but before she could find one Skills cut her off.

"No buts cause you ain't got one," He said chuckling before continuing. "Now look I need a good costume, but that about as easy to find as Willy Wonka's golden ticket. You know it has to be Brooke appropriate or she'll bitch so we got our work cut out for us. Now I'll pick you up at 7 tomorrow," Skills told her before leaning down and capturing her lips with his before turning around and walking out like nothing happened leaving a shocked Peyton.

"What the hell just happened? He kissed me? And what if I had plans!" She asked out loud before shaking her head and making her way back to her classroom. _Stupid guys cornering me _she thought. _Wait is this a date or just as friends crap, _Peyton addedrunning her hands through her curly locks._ I'm so glad I only have 2 blocks left before the _days_ over. Than I can go home and draw without anyone cornering me. _

--

As soon as the bell rang dismissing the class and ending the school day the kids swarmed out the door each wanting to get their weekends started. Haley was just as anxious as she threw her books haphazardly in her bag before making her way to the gym where she knew Nathan would be.

Even though they kept their relationship a secret it wouldn't raise any suspicions if she was caught in Nathan's office because Peyton, Lucas, Brooke, Skills, Nathan and her had been hanging out almost every weekend and the 4 who worked at the school usually spent their lunches together. She walked into the locker room and headed straight for his office excited to see him. She walked in without knocking and saw him pouring over some game plays, a smile tugging at her mouth as he let out an exasperated sigh before running his hands through his hair.

Closing the door behind her gently so he wouldn't hear it she tiptoed behind him and put her hands on his shoulders before she started massaging them.

Nathan jolted, shocked, and was about to turn around when he recognized her small, powerful hands and soon felt the tension leave him and relish in her touch.

"Hey," He grumbled letting the stress leave his body.

"Hi," Haley said bending down and whispering in his ear, her hot breath tickling his skin. Quickly turning his chair around he pulled her down on his lap before kissing her. She let his tongue enter and soon the kiss turned rough as each tried to taste the other as much as they could. Nathan's hands rested on her hips as she fisted her hands in his hair as his greedy lips moved to her jaw line and started sucking on it making her moan in pleasure.

"So I was thinking we could go to the movies tonight," Haley said breathlessly trying to concentrate on what she was saying.

"mhmm," Nathan mumbled before kissing his way back up to her lips as the two battled for dominance forgetting that anyone could walk in at any moment. Haley wrapped her arms around her neck as he squeezed her closer to him so their was no room between them each lost in the kiss they didn't hear the door open.

"What the hell are you doing?" Whitey bellowed breaking the two apart as Haley looked up in horror at her grandpa.

"Grandpa," Haley smiled weakly jumping off Nathan's lap before straightening out her clothes. "It's so good to see you," She said giving him a hug, her cheeks flaming red in embarrassment.

"Whitey," Nathan said nodding his head as the older man glared at him.

"Haley what are you doing with him?" Whitey asked fuming at catching his young granddaughter making out with Nathan Scott.

"I think you know what we were doing," Nathan smirked as the old mans face turned beet red in anger and Haley gave him a evil glare before going to her grandpa.

"Grandpa why don't you come over tomorrow for supper and we'll talk about it then ok?" Haley said giving him her best puppy dog eyes.

"Fine," Whitey said gruffly before walking up and smacking Nathan upside the head. "Stay away from my granddaughter," He told him before walking out of the office leaving Haley flustered and embarrassed.

"That was umm awkward," Haley said nervously fiddling with her pinkie ring.

Nathan rose from the chair and walked over to the door where she was standing locking it before wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her to him. "Now where were we?" He asked before dipping down and giving her an earth-shattering kiss that left her weak in the knees.

"Nathan we can't I have to go and figure out what to make for dinner tomorrow and get ready for our date," Haley said after pulling away breathlessly.

"I don't want you to leave," He told her pouting.

"Pick me up at 7," Haley told him popping a kiss on his lips before walking out of the office.

--

After school Peyton ran to Brooke's house to see if the brunette could help her. She would have gone to Haley's but she had enough on her plate especially with what next month would bring.

Peyton knocked frantically on the door, and a few seconds later a very annoyed Brooke answered. "Listen you jer-Peyton." She said, a dimpled smile suddenly overtaking her face. "What're you doing here?"

"Whose the jerk?" Peyton asked with her arms folded across her chest.

"The new neighbor, he came over to introduce himself and then he came over to see if he could borrow a cup of sugar! Now if that's not a pick up line I don't know what is and I'm way to happy with your brother to give him a chance, although he is kinda hot," Brooke rambled, before waving a hand in the air. "Now what are you doing here P. Sawyer?" Brooke questioned.

"You've been hanging around Haley to much," Peyton said shaking her head before continuing. "Anyways remember last month and how Skills and Lucas both asked me out and I was able to avoid answering them?"

"Yea," Brooke said pulling Peyton in and closing the door.

"Anyways today they both cornered me and I think I'm going on a date with Skills and they both kissed me," Peyton confided as Brooke's mouth went agape.

"P. Sawyer you slut!" Brooke joked making her way into the kitchen and going to the freezer.

"What do I do?" Peyton asked as Brooke gave her a spoon and put the container of ice cream in between them.

"Who do you like?" Brooke asked simply.

"I dunno," Peyton mumbled looking down.

"Why are you scared Peyton?" Brooke asked looking at the curly blonde.

"I don't want to get my heart broken again," Peyton told her simply looking Brooke in the eyes.

"So tell me about this neighbor," Peyton said raising an eyebrow.

"His name's Owen he just moved here from Chicago and he can't understand that I'm not interested in him," Brooke said rolling her eyes as Peyton chuckled.

"So have you written to Derek?" Peyton asked curiously.

"Yea I really like him" Brooke said shyly.

_Wow she's serious about my brother_ Peyton thought happily. _They're going to make a great couple! I hope he knows just how much she likes him_ Peyton wondered.

--

Nathan and Haley had just finished the movie and were walking to beach since it was such a nice night.

"So what did you think of the movie?" Nathan asked her holding her hand.

"I liked it. Did you?" Haley asked since it was a 'chick flick.'

"It was ok," Nathan said shrugging his shoulders as Haley playfully slapped him. "Ah the abuse," Nathan joked before stopping and pulling Haley to him. "I think you really hurt me so now I need a kiss to make up for it" He told her with a smirk.

"Ok," Haley caved giving him a kiss on his arm where she slapped him.

"No not right there, right here," He told her pointing to his lips.

"Hmm I dunno," Haley said trying not to smile.

"You know you want to," He told her huskily leaning down so their lips were a breath apart.

_Oh screw letting him win_ she thought greedily put her lips on his and sticking her tongue out to dance with his. Neither noticed the person watching them from the sidewalk shaking their head at the sight. _Why didn't they tell us? _The person asked themselves before walking away.


	9. Bleeding Love

**HJS-NS-23- Ok so you all probably want to kill me for not updating earlier and I'm so sorry, but finals ended and then I went home and then started my first summer class that is observing at a high school so it takes all day and then trying to write and go to bed early so I can wake up at 5 am is very exhausting! I want to dedicate this chapter to Allie, Steph and Hayley and Lisa. Allie gave me a great idea, which is the ending and Steph and Hayley were great for telling me that parts sounded okay when I wasn't sure. Also Lisa found the song this chapter is named after when I was having problems trying to find one. Anyways thank you to everyone who reviewed. Remember this story is rated M for a reason! Enjoy and don't forget to review.**

**Song: **Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis

**Quote:** "There is nothing holier in this life of ours than the first consciousness of love, the first fluttering of its silken wings."

_- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow_

* * *

After Nathan dropped her home last night Haley went straight to her recipe book to see if she could find her grandma's recipe for her special chicken breast deluxe.

She searched high and low, in all the cupboards until finally, "Aha!" She cheered as she finally found it. _I can't believe he caught us! Hopefully he'll love this. Grandma always made this when he had a bad day._ Haley rambled inside her head.

Haley glanced at the clock and saw it was already 11 pm. _Better get to bed_ she thought placing the recipe on the counter before walking up the stairs to her bedroom.

--

Nathan woke up with a smile on his face, after that dream of Haley he had to go see her. Grabbing his cell phone off his dresser he pressed the call button twice and waited for her to pick up.

"Hey," Haley said picking up her phone, a smile gracing her features as she was looking in the fridge.

"Hi," Nathan's sleep laced voice spoke sending tingles through Haley's whole body.

"Did you just wake up?" Haley asked before letting the fridge door slam shut as she picked up her notepad and scribbled cream cheese on her grocery list.

"No," Nathan denied yawning before he sat up.

"Liar," Haley said laughing as she heard him yawn.

"Maybe," He smirked as she rolled her eyes. "Whatcha doing today?" he asked.

"I have that dinner with grandpa," she told him in a duh tone.

"You need help?" He asked feeling guilty that she would have to talk to Whitey about them.

"Well you know my other tall boyfriend called and had to cancel, so you could come grocery shopping with me and get the stuff off the high shelves for me," Haley said taking her bottom lips between her teeth and lightly biting it as she anxiously waited for his reaction.

"You see I would, but well there's this hot brunette I'm suppose to ravish later," Nathan huskily told her with a smirk picturing Haley's mouth dropping open in shock.

"Well I better let you get ready then." Haley said, trying to keep her voice serious.

"You know I could postpone it…I mean I know you need my strong muscles to help you," He told her trying to keep his voice normal and not panicky.

"Well if it isn't too much of a hassle…" Haley conceded thinking about last week when she saw him playing at the river court without a shirt on. _Mhmm his strong, taunt muscles, glistening and…knock yourself out of it Haley _she scolded herself.

"Of course not." he said a little more eagerly than he would've liked.

"Okay if you're sure…just go take a shower before you come here because I know you just woke up," Haley said cheekily before hanging up.

Nathan groaned when he thought about Haley joining him in the shower, his boxers becoming painfully tight as he thought about washing her hair and her body, before fucking her against the wall of the showers as the warm water sprayed down on them and her moaning his name.

Walking into the bathroom he quickly turned the water to cold before stepping it, hoping it would help cool him down after his little daydream of Haley.

After washing himself Nathan walked out in all his glory grabbing a towel and wrapping it around his waist before searching through his closet for some clothes. After grabbing a blue t-shirt and jeans he walked to the dresser and grabbed a clean pair of boxers. Throwing the clothes on he ran his hands through his hair, ruffling it up just the way Haley likes it before grabbing his car keys to pick her up.

--

After grabbing a shopping cart the two made their way through the aisles. "Lets see I need chicken breasts, Ritz crackers, cream cheese, and butter." Haley told Nathan as a smirk came on his face.

"I can see why we need butter, but you know whip cream works better," Nathan whispered huskily in Haley's ear before checking the aisle and sucking on her jaw. Smirking when she moaned in pleasure, gripping the cart tightly she let go before she grabbed his face in her hands and fused their mouths together.

Pulling away when air became an issue he rested his forehead against hers, each gasping for breath. As Haley looked around a deep blush crept on her cheeks remembering they were in the middle of the grocery store.

"We can't do this here," She whispered slightly pushing him away before picking up her grocery list that had fallen to the floor in the heat of the moment.

"We just did," Nathan smirked at her remembering them saying the same things in the classroom.

"Lets just finish shopping," Haley said rolling her eyes as she set her mind on the task of getting everything for tonight's dinner. _It has to go perfect_ she thought to herself.

--

"Hey curly fry," Skills said when Peyton opened the door in an AC/DC t-shirt and hip hugger jeans.

"Hi, ready to go?" Peyton asked.

"Yea," Skills said before the two got in Peyton's comet as she drove off towards the costume shop.

The two got there in record time, walking into the shop they both looked around. "So what you gonna be curly fry?" Skills asked wrapping an arm around her.

"Dunno yet," Peyton said shrugging her shoulders as she looked around at the different costumes.

"I'm gonna go try some on, let me know what you think," Skills said walking into the dressing room before coming back out as a ninja.

"No," Peyton said shaking her head at him before walking away.

A few minutes later he walked out all in purple with a feather sticking out of the pimp hat.

"Wanna be my suga momma?" He asked trying to keep a straight face as Peyton doubled over in laugher.

"Hell no," She said before he turned around and walked in the dressing room again.

Next he came out carrying a wooden boulder and a brown fur dress looking thing.

"What the hell are you suppose to be?" Peyton asked trying not to laugh.

"A caveman," He told her seriously before shaking his head and walking back in.

_This will get you, no girl can resist a guy in uniform_ he thought with a smile as he pulled on the yellow pants and matching jacket before grabbing the hat.

Walking out Peyton felt her mouth drop as she looked at Skills in front of her. _He's defiantly filled out from the boy I remembered,_ she thought slightly blushing at him as a fireman with the hat on and the jacket open, no shirt on underneath.

"Like what you see?" Skills teased as Peyton tried to think of a comeback.

"P. Sawyer, Skills!" Brooke said excitedly sauntering towards them with Lucas following behind.

"Hey B. Davis," Peyton said welcoming the distraction.

"So guess who got a letter!!" Brooke said excitedly.

"A lot of people," Peyton said much to the annoyance of Brooke.

"Well besides that. Me!" Brooke told her while digging in her purse to fish out the letter. "Derek wrote and he says hi and he misses me and I really miss him P. Sawyer, how can you not worry about him. Ooh Skills you look hot, wanting to put P. Sawyers fire out?" Brooke questioned as Peyton looked at her with wide eyes, Skills looking down in embarrassment and Lucas glaring at the other man.

Brooke looked at Peyton apologetically before trying to change the subject. "Skills why are you trying on costumes anyways? Didn't you get my message I have everyone's outfits picked out?" Brooke asked raising a perfectly manicured eyebrow. Peyton saw the guilt flash in Skills eyes and rolled her eyes at being so naïve. Of course Brooke would have planned everyone's costume and this was just an excuse for a semi-date with Peyton.

"Well I wanted to have a backup," Skills said avoiding everyone's glances.

"Too bad, you're wearing what I picked out no objections." Brooke told him before hooking her arm with Peyton's. "Now P. Sawyer lets hit this place, Broody you and Skills can go play basketball or something," Brooke said before dragging Peyton to the desk and getting 3 bags and leaving.

"So why were you with Peyton?" Lucas asked accusingly.

"Does it matter dog?" Skills asked evasively, while glancing around the store noticing they were the only two customers in there.

"Maybe it does," Lucas said jealously.

"Well its between me and her so don't worry about it," Skills told him glaring.

"You need to back off," Lucas said stepping closer to Skills.

"Or what your puny ass is going to make me?" Skills asked in disbelief.

"Maybe," Lucas told him as Skills looked away trying to relive some of the tension in the small building._ I don't know what the hell his problem is but he needs to get over it_, he thought. Behind him Lucas was balling his hand into a fist tightly holding it to his side so he wouldn't punch Skills and cause a scene.

Right when Skills turned around he saw Lucas' hand balled into a fist and before anything could happen the bell on the door rang alerting the store of a new person entering. Both were shocked when in stepped Peyton Sawyer.

"Is everything ok?" Peyton asked with a raised eyebrow looking between both guys. To say it was awkward being in the same room as just the two of them was an understatement, but she'd never seen the guys giving each other murderous looks until now.

"Okay somebody better explain to me what the hell is going on," Peyton yelled wide-eyed looking between the two who were both dodging her eyes.

"Nothing," Lucas mumbled glancing briefly at Skills and squinting his eyes telling him not to say anything.

"Yea we're fine curly fry," Skills said throwing his arm around her shoulders and pulling her close to him while giving Lucas a shit-eating grin.

"Okay well I just have to grab my phone before Brooke kills me for making her wait," Peyton said shrugging off Skills arm and reaching next to where Lucas was standing for her cell, a victorious smile on Lucas' face at her brushing Skills off.

"See you guys later," Peyton said running out the door and leaving the two in another face off.

--

Haley was currently stirring the brownie mix in the bowl when Nathan came up behind her and started kissing her neck. Distracting her as he lightly sucked and bit her skin before swiping his tongue over it and soothing it. Loving the feeling of his mouth on her body she leaned back into him and moved her head giving him better access to her neck.

Fed up of his lips not hers she quickly turned around and crashed their lips together. His tongue quickly plunged into her mouth as the two fell into a passionate kiss needing each other more than air. Nathan had one hand on Haley's hip holding her close to him as the other skimmed under her shirt drawing circles with his fingers. Needing to feel more of him Haley's hands found the hem of his t-shirt and let her hands run over his taunt, defined muscles before breaking the kiss to lift it over his head.

She was now trapped against the counter and trembling with need as he pulled her closer to him. She jumped onto him wrapping her legs around his waist and could defiantly feel his arousal through his jeans empowering her to move his hands to the hem of her shirt so he could yank it off. Knowing what she was silently asking him to do he broke the kiss and looked into her eyes making sure it was ok. Looking into her eyes he could see lust, passion and something else and threw her shirt on the ground to meet his. His rough hand cupped her breast as she let out a moan of delight into his mouth. The two were falling into oblivion when the kitchen timer dinged bringing them back to reality as Haley pulled away panting heavily.

"We can't do this now," She told him trying to catch her breath.

"Why?" He whined like a little kid, while squeezing her butt and burying his face in the crook of her neck.

"Because my grandpa will be here really and then he'll really hate you," She told him chuckling at the cute pout on his face.

"Fine but you owe me," He warned her as he connected their lips together in a slow and sensual kiss that would have made Haley weak in the knees if her legs weren't already wrapped around Nathan.

"Mhmm," Haley agreed feeling light headed from his kisses. She gently slid to the ground before reaching to grab her shirt and pull it over her head, tossing Nathan his so he could do the same.

After the two fixed themselves Haley poured the brownies into the pan and placed it in the oven taking the chicken out and stirring the corn in the microwave. Nathan grabbed the plates that were sitting on the counter and started setting the table for the three of them, while looking back at Haley every couple seconds.

"Quit staring Scott," Haley chuckled catching him.

"I'm sorry I just have a very sexy girlfriend," He told her wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her neck again.

"Not uh, none of this," Haley said weakly as his lips started to trail over to her pulse point.

"Ok fine," Nathan said moving away after teasing her.

"You're such a jerk," Haley yelled frustrated as Nathan just grinned.

"I'm just following your request," He told her with his signature smirk.

Before Haley could say another word the doorbell rang. Quickly straightening out her outfit she looked at Nathan and gave him a look to do the same before walking to the door and opening it.

"Grandpa," Haley said excitedly before giving the older man a big hug.

"Jelly Bean," Whitey said squeezing her tight before his eyes saw Nathan and narrowed. "What's he doing here?" He asked gruffly pointing at the raven-haired man in the kitchen doorway smirking.

"Grandpa I'd like you to meet my boyfriend Nathan Scott," Haley said walking over to Nathan and intertwining their fingers together.

"I know who he is, but why the hell are you dating him?" Whitey asked folding his arms across his chest.

"Because he's sweet and caring and" Haley started, but was cut off by a loud snort coming from Whitey.

"Yea right Nathan Scott sweet," Whitey said sarcastically.

"He is grandpa," Haley said as Nathan looked away nervously. Sure he was sweet now, but he used to be a big player in high school and Whitey knew that from first hand experience. He also had one serious girlfriend in high school and always cheated on her, but he would never cheat on Haley. There was just something about her that made her different.

"Lets eat," Haley said hoping to ease the tension as the three sat down. The silence was defining. Haley didn't know what to say so all that could be heard was the clattering of forks and knives.

Wanting to break the silence Nathan cleared his throat. "Haley is an amazing woman," Nathan said giving Haley one of his rare genuine smiles that always seemed to come out around her.

"I know that that's why I don't want her to date you, she deserves better," Whitey said gruffly narrowing his eyes at Nathan.

Haley looked at her grandfather in disbelief. _I know he doesn't didn't like Nathan, but to tell him that we shouldn't date doesn't sound like the grandfather I know and love. He's always been so supportive of me and my decisions. Even though I want grandpa to like Nathan I'm not going to stop dating him just because he doesn't like him. Nathan makes me feel special why cant he see that, _Haley wondered.

"You know you're right she does deserve better, but I'm not the same boy I was in high school, and when I'm with Haley I never want to be that boy again. She's changing me even if I've only known her for a month I can tell you now my feelings for her are real and no one is going to get in the way of our relationship except me and her." He told a stunned Whitey.

Listening to Nathan talk to Whitey that way to made her realize something she surely didn't expect yet. _Oh my god I'm falling in love with him_ she thought shocked.

The rest of the dinner went in silence, as each was lost in their thoughts. Haley got up and went into the kitchen to grab the brownies leaving the two men alone in the dining room.

"Do you love her?" Whitey asked seriously. He now noticed the looks between his young granddaughter and Nathan and it was the same looks his late wife Camilla and himself gave each other.

_I always want to be around her, her kisses always make me want more, I hate being away from her, she's so cute when she scrunches her nose and fiddles with that gold pinkie ring_, Nathan thought before he finally realized he loved her.

"I…I dunno," Nathan said looking down at his plate so the older man in front of him wouldn't realize he did. Whitey smiled knowingly that being in love scared the shit out of the great Nathan Scott.

"Be good to her and don't do anything stupid," Whitey gruffly warned before walking in the kitchen to tell Haley bye.

"Hey jelly bean I'm going to head out." Whitey told her.

"Are you sure grandpa? It's still early," Haley said glancing at the clock and seeing it was only 9.

"Yea its past this old mans bedtime, but I'll see you later." Whitey told her giving her a hug.

"Bye grandpa," Haley said sadly.

"Hey jelly bean I know you're scared to open your heart, but I think Nathan may have grown up from the last time I knew him. Be careful though. I love you." Whitey told her wishing she would turn back into his little girl.

"I love you too Grandpa," Haley said walking him to the door.

Walking back into the dining room she saw Nathan sitting with his head in his hands in deep thought. Pushing the fact that she was falling in love with him she walked over and put her hand on his shoulder. His cyan blue orbs connecting with her brown ones and like always the world around them seemed to disappear.

_I love her_ he thought with a smile pulling her around so she was straddling his lap. "How did I do?" He asked cheekily.

"You did good," Haley told him with a smile.

"So does that mean I get rewarded now?" He asked giving her his puppy dog eyes she couldn't resist.

"I suppose so," Haley said before crashing their mouths together.

Each hungrily devouring the others mouth with their tongues. Wanting to feel his hard muscles she reached down and grabbed the bottom of his t-shirt throwing it to the ground. Nathan's hands roamed her body as he squeezed her ass, before reaching for the hem of her shirt and pulling away from her lips to take it off. Quickly fusing their mouths again her hand trailed up his defined chest as his lips broke away from hers and pursed her pulse point knowing how much it drove her crazy. He ran his thumb over her pert nipple as she arched her back in pleasure.

Using the hand that was holding onto her waist he reached behind and unclasped her bra expertly. Pulling the black satin off her he stilled as he looked on at her breath taking beauty. Her hair all mussed up, her lips pink and swollen from their hungry kisses, and sitting on top of him in only her jeans. Haley nervously looked at Nathan's lust covered eyes and squirmed on his lap feeling the friction between their jeans and his obvious hardness beneath her. They had never gone this far in their relationship. They usually only took their shirts off leaving Haley in a bra and her jeans, but when she didn't say anything Nathan figured if she wanted him to stop she would say something. Nathan wrapped his mouth around Haley's hard mound and flicked his tongue over her sensitive nipple, smirking as he heard her moan and fist her hands in his hair, before a deep throated groan fell from his mouth as she pushed herself down harder on him.

Hands groped each other, as the temperature in the room seemed unbearable. A thin layer of sweat formed on their bodies as the two continued to make out. Unexpectently Haley stood up surprising Nathan before holding out her hand for him to take it, which he did. She led him to her bedroom before pushing him on the bed and crawling on top of him her mouth finding its way back to his. Flipping them so she was now on the bottom Nathan ravished her eagerly, as she wrapped her legs around him needing to feel more of him.

All of a sudden it felt like a cold bucket of water fell on Haley as looked to the door and saw Josh standing there. Not noticing her hands stilled on him he kept sucking on her pulse point when he heard her mutter, "Josh?"


	10. You Gotta Be

**HJS-NS-23-Wow it's been so long since I've updated but life got in the way so I made this a longer chapter. My student observing is done so now I should hopefully have more time to write and update. I want to give a special thanks to A1, Furry Boots and Smiley for believing in me and repeatedly telling me I don't suck at writing and helping me when I got stuck on certain parts. I love you girlies and this chapter is dedicated to you three. Also do you guys want me to start putting the lyrics of the song the chapter is named after before the chapter? Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and I hope you enjoy. Remember to review and the drama is about to begin… ;o) Thanks to A1 and Furry Boots for finding and choosing my quote!**

**Song:** You Gotta Be by Des'ree

**Quote:** "For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation."

-_Rainer Maria Rilke_

* * *

_All of a sudden it felt like a cold bucket of water fell on Haley as looked to the door and saw Josh standing there. Not noticing her hands stilled on him he kept sucking on her pulse point when he heard her mutter, "Josh?"_

_What the hell? _Nathan thought when he heard her say another man's name before stopping his assault on her neck and looking into her confused eyes. He quickly got off her and left the room without a word leaving astunned and baffled Haley lying half naked on the bed.

_What the hell just happened why did I see Josh why was I so fuckin' stupid and mutter his name no wonder Nathan just left. Oh crap he doesn't know everything about Josh. Shit what the hell am I going to do. Oh yea that's a stupid question go after him dummy,_" Haley thought before running down the stairs frantically hoping she could stop Nathan and threw open the door coming face to face with a curly blonde and a shocked brunette.

Haley looked at Brooke confused before she remembered she didn't have a shirt on, as her eyes widened in embarrassment quickly covering her chest up, before slamming the door shut and running to the dining room where her and Nathan's shirts laid. Quickly pulling his on she walked back to the door and saw the two girls walking away.

"Wait Brooke, Peyton stop," Haley said grabbing the brunette's arm and turning her around.

"I never knew you had it in ya Tutor Girl," She grinned, "or should it be Tutor Slut?"

"It's not like that," Haley defended crossing her arms across her chest and looking at the two helplessly. "Nathan just left and I was going after him and I don't know what to do," She said her eyes filling up with tears as she looked at the two girls before her in misery.

"Then why are you standing here talking to us? Go get your man!" Brooke told her pushing Haley.

"I can't," Haley said choking on the words and shaking her head as the tears fell.

"What happened Haley," Peyton asked concerned knowing that when Haley was upset she would do one of two things. She would do something stupid and hold it all in or she would run and push everyone away.

"Okay Haley lets take you inside and you can tell us what happened," Brooke said soothingly wrapping an arm around the trembling, petite brunette and walking inside the house.

"What happened Haley?" Peyton asked once Brooke had pushed Haley to sit on the couch and Peyton sat next to her holding her close and rubbing her back comforting the young woman.

"Well…umm…gosh I feel stupid, but me and Nathan were making out and…and…all of a sudden I…I saw Josh Peyt." Haley stuttered overwhelmed by the night's previous activities.

Peyton's eyes widened in surprise as Brooke just looked back and forth between the two confused.

"Haley hunny Josh is dead," Peyton told her the knife cutting through her heart, as she had to say those words to her best friend again. Josh was like her brother and losing him was almost as bad as losing Jake.

"I know Josh is dead," Haley snapped angrily standing up and glaring at the blonde. "I've known he's been dead for 3 FUCKING YEARS!" She yelled as Brooke backed into the corner of the couch and crawled into the fetal position terrified of Haley right now.

Knowing Haley was just being defensive and the only way to get through Peyton roared back. "I know that too Haley! You weren't the only one affected by his death!"

"Don't you dare… don't you dare try to act like you know how I feel Peyton!" Haley screamed.

"You're right. I've never lost someone close to me have I?" Peyton asked letting out a sarcastic laugh as Brooke looked confused between the two. She didn't know much about Peyton's life because the blonde never really opened up to her and saw the tears fill up in Peyton's eyes, as Haley looked apologetic.

"I've just lost 2 fucking mothers, a father and…" Peyton stopped not being able to tell them about the others she lost and put her hand over her mouth choking back a sob before continuing. "So how the hell would I know how you feel right?" Peyton asked before turning and walking away into the kitchen so she wouldn't say something she'd regret.

"Haley," Brooke said standing up as Haley put her hand out to stop her.

"I got this one," She told her sadly. "Peyton!" Haley shouted, going after her friend, guilt taking over her senses and walking into the kitchen where Peyton was sitting with her head in her hands and crying.

Walking over to the fridge Haley opened the freezer and got out the chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream before rummaging in the drawers for two spoons. Peyton looked up as the spoons clattered in the drawer and held out her hand as Haley gave her one. Brooke tiptoed to the doorway her curiosity getting the best of her. They each took a bite before simultaneously saying, "I'm sorry."

"I didn't mean to make this about me, but Hales you have to let him go and I know it's hard I do, but I'm here for you. Remember no matter what we'll stick by each other."

"I know, I'm sorry I said that you didn't know how I feel it's just gah I don't know what to do!" Haley said running her hands through her hair frustrated.

"What happened?" Peyton asked soothingly while standing up and getting another spoon.

"Brooke," Haley yelled gaining the brunettes attention and walking into the kitchen guiltily.

"Yea?" She mumbled embarrassed.

"You can hear this too, maybe since you know Nathan you can help," Haley said as Peyton handed her a spoon and the three all stuck their spoons into the cold ice cream.

"Anyways I saw Josh and kinda mumbled his name," Haley said humiliated, her cheeks flaming red and drawing little shapes with her fingers on the countertop.

"Damn that's messed up," Brooke said stating the obvious.

"Tell me about it," Haley muttered. "Any ideas how I can get out of this hole I dug myself in?" She asked hopefully.

"Get a shovel?" Brooke suggested, gasping when Peyton slapped her arm.

"Not helping," Peyton said as Haley let out an exasperated sigh.

"Well…Nathan's a hard person to get through once he has his walls up. I don't know how the hell to get through to him and I've known him like 8 years," Brooke said throwing her hands up in annoyance of not being able to help Haley. "Although I so knew you two were going to get together," She added as the other brunette just glared back in response.

"I know damn Hales I caught you two making out when I was walking home from Brooke's, although after you're whole problem with Nathan is done with I'm going back to being pissed at you for hiding this from me," Peyton told her as Haley looked down guiltily.

"So how long have you two been together?" Brooke asked nudging Haley's shoulder with her own.

"A month," Haley said putting her head down so she wouldn't see the hurt look cross on Peyton's face she knew was there.

"Damn tutor girl I can't believe you two hid it so well," Brooke said jokingly, not realizing it was such a sensitive subject.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Peyton asked hurt.

"I…I dunno" Haley said honestly. The two had never kept secrets from each other. _So why didn't I tell her?_ She asked herself.

"Okay back to the Nathan thing does he know about Josh?" Brooke asked curiously coming up with an idea.

"Just that I told him I dated someone whose name was Josh and I loved him, but on the day that he was going to propose he was involved in a hit and run. They found the ring in his pocket, that's how I knew. Also that it happened 3 years ago. And if he wanted a relationship with me, he needed to know because I felt blamed for his death." Haley rambled to a shocked Brooke and a sad Peyton.

"Hales I don't know how many times I have to tell you this, but Josh's death wasn't your fault." Peyton told her putting her hand on top of Haley's.

"Shit," Haley said smacking her forehead. "I told him I loved Josh before and then I mumble Josh's name when he was sucking on my neck of course he's freaked…Damn it! He prolly thinks I wish he was Josh," Haley yelled frustrated with herself.

"Tutor Girl I think I have an idea of how you can get out of this…" Brooke told her double-checking the plan in her head.

"What's that?" Haley asked wondering how anything she could say would get Nathan to talk to her.

"I know just tell him you want to move on with him and then I dunno the truth that Josh is the only guy you've ever seriously dated," Peyton told her.

"Well I was going to say you go over there wearing a long coat with nothing else on and then when he lets you in you pull it open and he'll become all sex crazed and forget," Brooke said giving a dimpled smile as the other two looked at her like she had two heads.

"Yea cause Nathan would totally forget she said another guys name," Peyton said rolling her eyes at Brooke's naivety.

"Ok so I guess that won't work," Brooke said scrunching her nose while trying to think of another plan.

"Thanks anyways," Haley said with a half smile.

"No problem tutor girl, now before you go and get your man I think you should let him cool off. Just from past experiences you don't want to talk to a pissed off Nathan." Brooke informed them shuddering at the only time she tried talking to an angry Nathan.

"Okay," Haley said solemnly wondering how the conversation would go.

"So Josh was an old flame?" Brooke asked quietly while fidgeting.

"Yea," Haley said biting her bottom lip and willing the tears not to come. "He was one of my best friends…" Haley added.

"You don't have to tell me Haley," Brooke told her looking at the petite brunette.

Haley looked at Peyton in confirmation secretly making sure that she could trust Brooke like she thought she could. Peyton nodded her head and Haley continued. "3 years ago almost 4 Josh was hit by a drunk driver." Haley said squeezing her eyes shut, as Peyton moved her stool closer to Haley's. Haley looked at her and silently begged Peyton to continue with her eyes.

"He was rushed to the hospital where they worked on him, but he didn't make it. He was involved in a hit n run. After the accident when they gave us his belongings we saw a little black velvet box with an index card. The speech was so beautiful, he was going to ask Hales to marry him," Peyton told Brooke while Haley squeezed her hand as the tears coursed down her cheeks remembering the smell of the hospital and how she felt her life ended that day.

Brooke looked at the two strong women in front of her as they both had tears falling down their eyes and holding on to each other as if their life depended on the other.

"I can still remember the words," Haley spoke up looking between the two.

"Me too," Peyton said remembering the words before she started saying them, all three girls sat with their backs resting on the counter behind them.

"Honey bee I love you so much it hurts," She started to say as Josh came into the kitchen and stood in front of Haley.

"Growing up and being with you has made my life complete. I don't know where I would be in this world without you by my side. Meeting you in the park when we were kids changed my life. You are the brightness in my life. No matter what happens I know that I always want you by my side. I know what we have is true. I love you. You were my first kiss and I want you as my last kiss, you were my first love and I want you to be my only love, when I think about 10 years down the road I see us with kids, me being a businessman with you as my beautiful wife being a singer, even though you got a degree to become a English teacher. Our life would be perfect. So what I'm saying is Haley Elizabeth James will you do me the honor of becoming Mrs. Josh Jagelski." The two finished as Haley stared at Josh who was down on one knee with a smile on his face.

Haley looked at him with tears in her eyes as she felt her heart break all over again. Brooke and Peyton had tears in their eyes at the bittersweet speech that Peyton had just given. Josh was staring at Haley with love and pain in his eyes before standing up and motioning to her bedroom.

"Hey guys I'll be right back I just want to yea…" Haley trailed off.

The two girls exchanged looks before going back to digging into the melting ice cream.

As soon as Haley got to her room she closed the door softly before whirling around to face Josh, daggers in her eyes.

"What's wrong Haley?" Josh asked innocently as Haley's hands curled into fists, the anger rolling off her in vast waves.

"You know what the hell is wrong! You come in here when I am making out with Nathan for god knows what and then that damn stunt downstairs," Haley screamed in rage pointing down.

"Well I'm not the one whose only been dating the guy a month and about to fuck him," Josh said raising his voice.

"Are you calling me a whore?" Haley asked fuming. _If only I could actually punch the asshole_ she thought.

"Well if the shoe fits," Josh snapped angrily.

"You told me I need to get on with my life and then when I try you just keep popping up! What the hell do you want from me?" Haley yelled running her hands through her hair frustrated.

"Moving on and fucking some guy are 2 different things," Josh said indignantly.

"So you're supposed to be the only guy I'll ever be with?" Haley said vexed.

"YES," Josh yelled as Haley's eyes widened in shock and she stumbled slightly taken aback.

"That's what this is…you're jealous," Haley said in disbelief.

"No," Josh denied.

"You're fucking jealous that I was going to sleep with someone else," Haley huffed.

"Well its not like you'll be able to satisfy him with all the experience he's had, hell we lost ours together," Josh said knowing his words would hurt her.

"You bastard," Haley gritted out angrily.

"The bastard you gave yourself to," He told her with a shit-eating grin.

"Fuck you." She seethed. "No I think you mean fuck you," Josh bit back.

"Wow, I can't remember why the hell I wanted to marry you in the first place." She spat, "first you're telling me to move on and all this other spiel of crap and now you're all jealous and being a complete asshole. What the hell is your problem?" She screamed.

"Because I still fucking love you!" He shouted back, before his voice became softer. "Do you know how hard it s to watch you love someone else-" She was about to interrupt him, say she didn't love Nathan, but he simply continued. "It's so hard Hales, and I know I told you to move on, and I know you have to, but... it's just so hard." He told her in a broken whisper.

"I'll always love you no matter what but its time to open my heart to someone else. I'll never forget you and you'll always have a piece of my heart, but its time I let you go I think," She told him as tears ran down both their faces.

"Take care of yourself. You'll always have my heart Haley James," Josh said before disappearing before her eyes.

"I love you," She whispered into the empty room before wiping the tears off her face and heading back downstairs to the kitchen.

--Meanwhile--

"I can't believe this shit," Nathan screamed walking into the back door of his brothers room and letting it slam shut scaring the crap out of Lucas who was working on his book.

"Dude what the hell is wrong with you? Trying to give your brother a heart attack?" Lucas questioned trying to get his heart to beat normally. He was so lost in the words that seemed to pour out of his fingertips that everything else around him disappeared when he wrote.

"I was fucking making out with a half naked woman and she mumbles some other assholes name," Nathan screamed throwing the orange basketball that was on Lucas' bed in rage aiming for the hoop, but missing, instead inches away from hitting Lucas in the face.

"Dude you almost hit my face," Lucas said trying to figure out what the hell had his brothers undies in such a twist.

"Oh no not your precious face!" Nathan mocked throwing up his hands before flicking Lucas off.

"What the hell happened? And where the hell is your shirt?" Lucas asked confused scratching the side of his head wondering how his brother had gotten so upset and why he only had a pair of jeans on.

"Huh?" Nathan asked looking down before he realized he wasn't wearing a shirt. "Must of left it at Hales," He said pacing the floor in a fury.

"Wait why the hell would you have left it at Haley's? Unless…wait what the hell's going on?" Lucas asked not being able to wrap his head around the situation.

"We were making out and laying on her bed and she was moaning until all of a sudden she fucking mumbled some other guys name! Who the fuck does that. This is complete bullshit," Nathan said punching the wall in anger as Lucas' eyes widened in shock. He hadn't seen his brother this pissed since he found out he couldn't play in the NBA.

"Okay Nate calm down," Lucas told him seeing the huge hole now in his wall and his brothers bloody knuckles.

"I need a drink," Nathan said walking out of the bedroom and going to the kitchen opening the door to grab a beer before swallowing it in two gulps and reaching for another one by the time Lucas had reached the kitchen.

"Nathan stop," Lucas said sternly taking the bottle out of his hand as Nathan lunged at him trying to grab it back.

"I'm never going to be good enough for anyone am I?" Nathan asked brokenly before turning around and walking out of the house leaving a dazed and confused Lucas wondering as to what the hell just happened.

Nathan went to the trunk of his car and grabbed an old t-shirt out pulling it out and shoving it on before getting in his black SUV and making his way to Tric.

--

Nathan had gotten to Tric and made a beeline straight to the bar and sat down, waving the bartender over.

"Gimme 3 shots of tequila," He told the bartender.

"Ok," The bartender said pouring the shots and placing them in front of the man.

Before he could move the shots were gone and Nathan was motioning for some more.

The bartender gave him a look, before shrugging and refilling the glasses, and in a flash Nathan had knocked them back, the alcohol barely touching the sides of his throat. "Fill me up." He ordered.

About 10 minutes later Nathan was feeling good. He didn't care that his brother was a wimp and that Haley mumbled another man's name while he was devouring her. _Okay that's a lie_ he thought gulping down the next 3 shots and waiting impatiently for the glasses to be refilled,_ that just means it would be more of a challenge, and Nathan Scott is not one to back down from a challenge,_ he reminded himself determined next time she would be screaming his name.

"So bartender guy what's your name?" Nathan asked swaying in his chair slightly.

"Owen," The tall, dark haired man replied, wiping down the counter.

"So Owen have you ever been in love?" Nathan asked looking intently at the blurry figure in front of him.

"Yea, once," Owen said leaning on the bar in front of Nathan.

"Did you ever wonder if you weren't good enough for her?" Nathan asked drunkenly insightful.

"What happened?" Owen asked curiously not wanting to divulge his personal life, even if this guy probably wouldn't remember it in the morning. Also he could see the pain etched in the man's feature and wanted to help.

"I fell in love I think," Nathan said scratching his head in confusion. "Anyways me and this girl, woman, whatever were making out and laying on her bed and she was moaning until all of a sudden she mumbled some other guys name! I have no clue why though? Did she realize I'm not good enough for her? Just like I wasn't good enough for my dad? I'm Nathan Scott girls beg me to sleep with them and then when I go to sleep with my girlfriend who I think I might love she mumbles another man's name I mean why wouldn't I be here getting drunk?" Nathan asked in deep thought remembering the night before knocking back another shot.

Owen just stood there shell-shocked. He had no idea what kind of advice to give the broken man in front of him. Never in all his years as a bartender had he heard this type of story.

"So the name of the guy, you ever heard her talk about him before?" Owen asked silently praying it wasn't as bad as he thought it was.

"No" Nathan said before furrowing his eyebrows trying to concentrate if the name sounded familiar. "No I don't fink so," he concluded scrunching is face up still in deep thoughts.

"Well maybe you should talk to her about it," Owen said trying to think of some great advice for the guy in front of him.

"Hey dog," Skills said coming up behind Nathan and slapping him on the back as Nathan almost fell off the stool.

"Sillllss," Nathan said with a cheeky smile while swaying on his chair and looking at Skills intently. "Come fink with me," He told the darker skinned man while motioning the empty shot glass in front of him.

"Yo dog I don't think you need anything more to drink," Skills told him seriously while casting a sideways glance at Owen.

"But Haley mumbled a different guys name and I…I…sleepy," Nathan said yawning before laying his head down on the sticky bar.

"Ok dude lets get you home and then I'll call Hales to come over and take care of your drunk ass since I think she's the cause," Skills said before turning to Owen. "How much does he owe you?" He asked pointing at Nathan whose eyes were falling shut.

"I just put it on his credit card he gave me earlier. I would call that girl apparently they were getting hot and heavy and then she mumbled some other guys name and yea…" Owen trailed off feeling sorry for the raven-haired man in front of him.

"Come on boozy," Skills said wrapping one of Nathan's arms around his shoulders and leading him out to his car. They could come back for Nathan's car later. After getting him home and on the couch Skills dialed Haley.

"Hey lady bug," Skills said when she answered the phone.

"Hey baldy what's up?" Haley asked washing the 3 spoons the girls had used to eat their ice cream earlier.

"So, you wouldn't happen to know why I found Nathan Scott drunk and mumbling to himself like a crazed lunatic about you saying another guys name?" He could practically see her biting her lip on the other end of the line. "So lady bug I need you to come over here and take care of his drunk ass since I'm assuming it's your fault he got plastered."

_Fuck_ Haley thought knowing now one more person probably knew about what happened tonight as her cheeks flushed pink in embarrassment.

"Yea I'll be there soon," She told Skills before hanging up and dropping her head to bang it on the counter exasperated. _Shit that actually hurt_ she thought rubbing her forehead.

"Hey guys I'll be back in a while," Haley said grabbing her car keys.

"What happened?" Brooke asked raising a perfectly plucked eyebrow questionably.

"Okay so long story short, Nathan's at Skills' drunk off his ass, and now I have to go and get him, which I guess is only fair since it's kinda my fault he went and got drunk in the first place, but I didn't force those drinks down his throat…" She continued to ramble.

"Hunny," Brooke interrupted her. "You just made a short story into a very long one."

"Right…we'll I have to go, Peyt just lock up when you guys leave with your key and I'll talk to you guys later," Haley said slipping on her black flip flops and running out the door.

"You think she was in a hurry?" Peyton asked cocking an eyebrow at Brooke as the two looked at the closed door.

"Well she did just run out of here in a tank top and pj shorts" Brooke said shaking her head at Haley's style choice.

--

Haley ran up to Skills door and knocked frantically so he would open the door since her legs and arms were freezing. _Stupid Haley forgetting to change out of your pjs_ she chastised herself as she jumped up and down in place trying to keep her blood flowing. After waiting a couple more minutes she realized no lights were on. _Crap they must be at Nathan's_ she thought running back to her car and turning the heat on full blast before driving in the direction of Nathan's house.

--

""Sills...are you and my brother fighting over the same blonde?" Nathan asked slowly trying not to slur.

Skills eyes got wide as he tried to get Nathan's mind off him and his messed up love life. "So what's going on with you and lady bug?" Skills asked bobbing his head up.

"Silly I'm not doing nuffin with a lady bug," Nathan said laughing his legs hitting the side of the couch before he fell back onto it clutching his side from laughing so hard.

"Dude you're messed up," Skills said shaking his head before walking away to answer the knock at the door.

"Hey," Haley said with a small smile.

"You deal with him." Skills told her before taking off down the steps.

"Skills!" Haley shouted after him, a look of shock and anger on her face.

"Love you Lady Bug!" He yelled back up to her, laughter in his voice.

She scoffed a little with an eye roll. "Yeah, yeah."

"HALEYYYYYYYYYY" Nathan said drunkenly when he saw the brunette, trying to sit up on the couch and drunkenly managing to make his way over to her continuingly tripping on his own feet.

_Oh god_ Haley thought scrunching her nose up when she smelt the tequila on his breath. "Oooh you drank a lot," She told him as he smiled goofily at her.

"You're so petty" He said trying to stroke her hair, but missing her head completely.

"Ok, lets get you to bed," Haley said taking his arm and leading him to his room before he stopped in his tracks.

"I cant," He told her seriously shaking his head before holding it as the room spun around him.

"Why?" Haley asked confused.

"Cause I gots a girlfriend already and she's butiful even if she wanted another guy I cants do that to her," He drunkenly rambled.

Haley's heart melted at his words that even if he was drunk he wouldn't cheat on her. "Okay I promise nothing will happen," She told him softly leading him to his bedroom again.

"Why'd she mumble another guys name?" Nathan asked brokenly looking in Haley's eyes as her heart broke a little seeing the bright blue eyes dulled with pain. She knew then that tomorrow when he was sober she'd have to tell him everything about Josh.

"Maybe she was just scared," Haley said as Nathan took off his shirt, the air whooshing out of her lungs as his muscles shone in the moonlight.

Nathan stripped down to his boxers before getting in bed. Just as Haley was about to leave the room Nathan's voice stopped her. "Stay with me Haley please," He asked nearly sober as his eyes pleaded with hers. Slipping off her flip-flops she crawled in next to him as his arm came and wrapped around her waist pulling her body close to him and spooning. He inhaled the smell of strawberries and vanilla from her and sighed in contentment.

Haley reveled in the feel of his strong arms cocooning around her and closed her eyes sleep overcoming her body.

"Haley," Nathan spoke slowly.

"Yea?" Haley asked her eyes staring at a picture of Nathan and Lucas at the rivercourt together.

"Why aren't I good enough for you?" He asked dejectedly.

Haley closed her eyes ashamed she had made him doubt himself. "You're too good for me" She whispered sadly.

He didn't hear her though and continued. "I'm falling in love with you Haley James," He mumbled as her eyes went wide with surprise.

"Will you catch me?" He asked vulnerably as Haley felt her heart swell with love scaring her before she heard his breathing even out letting her know he was asleep.

"I was hoping you would catch me," Haley murmured into the thin air as she kept replaying the whole night in her head and how the talk tomorrow about Josh would go.

Josh smiled sadly as he watched the two laying in bed knowing that they both already fell in love with the other but we're to scared to admit it.

Two small smiles fell on the lips of the two laying in bed. "I hope you let each other all the way in," He spoke softly before disappearing into thin air


	11. First Time

**HJS-NS-23- Ok so finally an update. I know Sorry it took so long, but I couldn't get the middle part done and this is such a turning point for the story, I wanted it to be perfect. I want to dedicate this to Steph, Hayley, Allie and Emma for helping me. Allie found the perfect song and Steph helped out with the quote. I have to thank Hayley for helping me with the end. Thank you to everyone who reviewed and I hope you like this chapter and please please review! I'll give you cookies! ****I am also going to try and write a one shot so it might be a little longer for an update unless I get a lot of reviews. Enjoy and review.**

**Song: **First Time by Lifehouse

**Quote:** "Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

-Harvey Mackay

* * *

The next morning Haley woke up with a pair of strong arms encircling her waist and a smile on her face, until it was wiped off when she remembered the talk they would soon be having.

Nathan felt someone stir in his arms and started to panic until he inhaled the vanilla as well as strawberries and tightened his old on her body, as the night before flashed through his head. Dinner with Whitey, making out, about to have sex, until Haley mumbled the name Josh, going to Lucas' punching a hole in the wall, and then going to Tric. It got a little blurry after that, but he remembered Skills. _He must have called Haley_ he thought to himself.

"Hi," Haley said shyly turning over.

"Hey," he replied running his hands over his face and wiping the sleep away.

"We…umm… we need to talk," Haley told him biting the inside of her cheek nervously.

"Yea," He agreed getting out of bed and walking downstairs to get a cup of water and some aspirin to stop the pounding in his head. Haley pursed her lips before grudgingly following after him.

Walking into the kitchen he reached into the cupboard and grabbed a couple aspirin before reaching in another one and grabbing a glass to pour water in.

When Haley got to the kitchen she stared at Nathan standing in front of the sink looking out the window.

"I want to explain about last night," She told him wringing her hands together nervously, before fiddling with the gold band on her right pinkie. A sure tell way to convey she was uneasy.

"Its fine," Nathan dismissed harshly not bothering to turn around.

"No its not," Haley said exasperated walking up to him and putting a hand on his shoulder, which he immediately brushed off.

"No okay Josh was my ex. The one I told you about before. I told you about him after you kissed me and I ran away." She tried reminding him. "The one who was my best friend and died right when he was going to propose to me…anyways he's the only guy I've ever been with and I was so scared that I wasn't going to be good enough that I imagined I saw Josh standing at the door. It wasn't you it was me and my messed up mind and I'm so sorry, but I'm just scared" Haley rambled as Nathan stared out the window in deep thoughts.

Now that she said reminded him Josh was her ex from before, he vaguely remembered her mentioning him. Still it hurt she mumbled another guys name. "I don't want to push you," He told her turning around and looking at her.

Haley looked at him adoringly. "You aren't," She told him gently.

"I feel like I am and I don't want to push you or make you do something you're going to regret." He told her seriously.

"I wouldn't of regretted it," She told him smiling as she walked up to him and put her arms around his neck. "But next time you get mad please don't just leave. I want you to be able to talk to me," She told him honestly.

"I'll try," Nathan said earnestly.

"So we're ok?" Haley asked nervously.

"Yea, we're okay. So Haley James will you go to the Halloween party with me?" Nathan asked with a smile wrapping his arm around her waist.

Haley contemplated thinking about it before smiling. "I'd love to, but I'm already going with Brooke and Peyton so I'll meet you there," She told him kissing him fervently, glad that they were okay.

--

"You know the devil doesn't have sequins or feathers or breasts for that matter," Haley said pointing at Brooke's costume.

"Well mine does and I'll look hot," Brooke said confidently waving her costume around on the hanger with a dimpled smile.

"You know the devil doesn't have feathers right?" Peyton asked raising an eyebrow and walking into the guest bedroom at Haley's place.

"What is with you people so she's a feathery devil!" Brooke said exasperated as Haley and Peyton shared a look before chuckling.

"So Peyt how did your costume come along?" Brooke asked curiously trying to close the door, so she could see the costume on the back that Peyton had insisted she would make.

"I guess you'll see in a little bit," Peyton said opening the door so Brooke wouldn't see what the costume looked like hanging on the back. "Although I have to be honest I'm glad we got a say in our costumes," Peyton added thinking of Brooke choosing Lucas, Nathan and Skills costumes without their say.

"Speak for yourself," Haley said crossing her arms and looking pointedly at Brooke.

"Hales you're so innocent looking you make the best angel," Brooke told her with a dimpled smile. "Now lets get ready to knock these guys socks off." Brooke clapped excitedly running to the bathroom. "I call the guest room shower," Brooke yelled behind her.

"So what's going on with you and Lucas or is it you and Skills?" Haley asked curiously with a smirk.

"Nothing…with either of them. I just…I dunno anymore," Peyton said running a hand through her curly locks perturbed. "What about you and Nathan? Get everything sorted out?" Peyton asked trying to slyly change subjects.

"Subtle really," Haley said rolling her eyes and shaking her head with a smile. "We talked and I think things will be ok. I hope they will be at least."

"Yea I hope so too. You deserve to be happy," Peyton said with a smile.

"So do you," Haley told her wrapping an arm around the curly blonde. She didn't know what happened with Jake that made Peyton fear a relationship so bad. As far as she knew their breakup was amiable.

"Hey you two weren't supposed to be having a moment you're suppose to be getting ready!" Brooke said walking into the room with a blue fluffy robe wrapped around her.

"Yea yea," Peyton said rolling her eyes before walking out the door and into the adjoining guest bathroom as Haley made her way to her master bathroom.

Brooke started drying her hair and turned on the music. Just as she was about to close the door she heard her name being called. "Brooke Penelope, don't you dare look at my costume," Peyton yelled as Brooke rolled her eyes before closing the door. When she closed the door her mouth dropped at the sight in front of her. _This is what she's wearing? I thought she was going to make it!_ Brooke asked herself staring at the half angel half devil costume in front of her, before stomping her foot and going to start drying her hair. _I actually let her choose what she was going to be and that's what she chose! I could've done a better job picking out her costume!_ She huffed out annoyed.

Peyton smirked when she heard Brooke stomp her foot and chuckled before stepping into the steaming, hot, shower.

After Haley and Peyton got out of the shower and made their way back to the guest room they saw Brooke straightening her hair and singing along to the radio.

"Okay so tutor girl we are going to curl your hair since mine is going to be straight, and since curly is the opposite of straight and devil is the opposite of angel I guess we should curl your hair, and Peyton I guess yours is going to be half straight-half curly because of your costume," Brooke told the duo rolling her eyes at Peyton.

"Brookie did you look at my costume?" Peyton asked biting the inside of her cheek from smiling.

"Yea you left it here where I could see it so of course," Brooke said like Peyton should of known better.

"Actually I'll be wearing a wig, so I just need to tuck my hair underneath it. All I have to worry about is make up, which I will put on now in the bathroom so you cant see it," Peyton said sticking out her tongue and going into the closet to grab a bag and walked into the adjoining bathroom.

After Brooke finished doing Haley's hair and make up she added finishing touches to her own as Haley walked back to her room to put on her costume. "So we'll all meet downstairs after we have our costumes on deal?" Brooke yelled so Peyton could hear her also.

"Deal," Haley yelled walking away.

"Okay," Peyton yelled from the bathroom.

10 minutes later Brooke had finished getting ready, dressed in her red halter devil costume that had feather accentuating her waist a deeper red and a deeper red color on her bust that clung to her curves, slinging on her red heels she made her way downstairs. Haley slipped on her spaghetti white dress, with a form-fitting bodice that ended up flowing out at the bottom, and stopping just before her knees accented with a sterling silver necklace and simple dangly earrings and a pair of white high heels. After grabbing her wings and halo she ran downstairs to meet the other two. Peyton put on her tight black costume, before her black and gray wig with black angel wings and big black bracelets with a pair of black platform shoes. She'd known Brooke had wanted to see her costume and wanted to surprise both the brunette's.

--

The three girls made their way into the packed club trying to make sure nobody hit their wings and looking for the guys. Peyton and Haley had no clue what the guys were wearing, only Brooke knew since she picked them out.

"So Brooke what are the guys wearing?" Peyton asked curiously.

"You'll have to find them and all I can say is good luck," Brooke told the duo mischievously before walking away to the bar.

"What do you think she means by that?" Haley asked nervously.

"I dunno," Peyton said shrugging her shoulders and looking for the guys.

Nathan saw Haley across the room and a smile crept to his face. _She looks beautiful_ he thought before making his way across the room to her, Lucas and Skills following closely behind.

Nathan quickly tapped Haley's shoulder as she whirled around with a hand on her hip. "Sorry I've got a boyfriend, I'm not interested," she told the guy who was staring at her in a batman costume.

"He doesn't have to know," He whispered huskily sending chills down her back and butterflies in her stomach. After Haley looked in Batman's eyes and at Superman standing next to Batman she recognized Lucas standing next to Nathan. _Two can play this game_ she thought.

A wicked grin spread on her face as she pressed her body against the hard batman costume and stood on her tiptoes her mouth close to his ear. "No I guess he doesn't," She agreed seductively as Nathan's eyes went wide before crashing her lips on his and he understood that she knew it was him.

Nathan took her bottom lip between his teeth and gently nibbled on it before running his tongue over the seam of her lips and thrusting his tongue in hers. Nathan picked Haley up by her waist and deepened the kiss.

"So Spiderman and Superman huh?" Peyton asked looking between the two guys.

"Come on curly fry you know I look good," Skills said through the red spider mask.

Peyton shook her head with a smile as she saw Lucas in the Superman black wig and costume.

"Yeah he might look good, but I'm the iron man! He's just a bug!!" Lucas said with defiance putting his fists on his hips and smirking.

Peyton looked at both men with incredulity and tried her hardest not bust out laughing.

"Dude it looks like you have a dead skunk on your head," Skills told Lucas in repugnance.

Peyton couldn't hold it in any longer and let out a loud laugh, while walking away to get a drink. She shook her head at the guy's immature behavior, and all the vying for her attention. _I really don't want a relationship right now, so I don't know why the keep fighting for my attention. I'm still trying to learn how to trust guys again after everything that happened with Jake,_ she thought sadly before heading to the bar and getting a drink. _Something strong_.

--

"So if it isn't my beautiful neighbor," a deep voice said putting a drink in front of the brunette sitting directly across from where he was standing.

"Which part of I'm not interested don't you get?" Brooke asked annoyed.

"The part where you keep coming into my work and talking to me," Owen said with a boastful smirk.

Looking around and seeing all her friends occupied she put her hands on the sleek bar top and leaned forward so their faces were inches apart. "I have a boyfriend and he's 10 times better than you. And before you even try to dip into your shallow pool of wit, let me paint us a picture and save us both the trouble. Here's your evening. You are going to finish working, leave me alone, unless I want another drink, go home, and make nice with yourself. But don't be thinking of me. Because even your fantasy of me isn't interested in you and please don't even try to be a friendly neighbor because I'm not ever going to be your girl next door." Brooke told him sitting back in her spot and waving Owen off before rolling her eyes and getting lost in thoughts of Derek and how much she missed him._ I really hope he writes me soon, I haven't head from him in awhile, and maybe I should talk to Peyton and see if she's heard from him, _she thought.

--

Peyton ordered a Sunkist and Malibu before turning around and looking out onto the dance floor.

"Peyton?" A male voice asked coming to stand next to her.

"Mouth?" Peyton asked unsurely.

"Yea how are you doing?" He asked her, while looking at the dark angel in front of him.

"I'm doing okay…haven't really seen you at the river court commenting on Nathan, Skills and Lucas' playing," She told him while looking at his John Travolta costume.

"Yea you know working at a news stations busy. But how are you? Having fun?" He asked earnestly genuine.

"Yea I don't know about working in a news station, but the high school is pretty hectic. I'm not really having fun. I mean, I'd just like to see the band cause its Fall Out Boy you know, but I still had to force myself to come here tonight.

"Yea me too." Mouth agreed nodding his head understandingly.

" I'm just dealing with some personal stuff." Peyton said shrugging her shoulders before glancing at Lucas and Skills who still seemed to be arguing.

"Yeah, me too." Mouth said thinking about how his girlfriend of 2 years, Shelly just broke up with him.

"And someone spilled soda on my wings." Peyton said a little resentfully.

"I think that was me." Mouth told her apologetically.

"Oh… I guess it's okay if it was you, but you owe me a dance now," She told him as disco inferno blared in the club and he led her to the dance floor. They started disco dancing under the disco ball hanging about their heads. Everyone was watching them and could see they were having fun as two sets of eyes glared at Mouth in jealousy.

"Okay are you all ready for Fall Down Boy?" Karen asked the audience wearing a rented cop costume, as the crowd looked around at each other silently asking the person next to them if she was serious.

"It's umm Fall Out Boy," Peyton yelled trying to help the poor woman on stage.

"Sorry Fall Out Boy," Karen said correcting her mistake. "Anyway do I hear a woot woot?" Karen asked the dead silent room, as Lucas looked at him mom embarrassingly, trying to hide it with an awkward smile. "Guess not… all right well without further ado Fall Out Boy." Karen said walking offstage as Fall Out Boy made its way on and started playing.

_She says she's no good with words but I'm worse  
Barely stuttered out  
"A joke of a romantic" or stuck to my tongue  
Weighed down with words too over-dramatic  
Tonight it's "it can't get much worse"  
Vs. "no one should ever feel like.."_

I'm two quarters and a heart down  
And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds  
These words are all I have so I'll write them  
So you need them just to get by

Whispered: We're going into D-Minor

Dance, Dance  
We're falling apart to half time  
Dance, Dance  
And these are the lives you'd love to lead  
Dance, this is the way they'd love  
If they knew how misery loved me

"Let's dance," Haley said pulling Nathan onto the dance floor and joining Peyton, Brooke and Mouth who were all dancing and singing along.

_You always fold just before you're found out  
Drink up its last call  
Last resort  
But only the first mistake and I..._

I'm two quarters and a heart down  
And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds  
These words are all I have so I'll write them  
So you need them just to get by

Why don't you show me the little bit of spine  
You've been saving for his mattress, love

"I love Fall Out Boy," Peyton told Brooke as they continued dancing.

_Dance, Dance  
We're falling apart to half time  
Dance, Dance  
And these are the lives you'd love to lead  
Dance, this is the way they'd love  
If they knew how misery loved me_

Why don't you show me the little bit of spine  
You've been saving for his mattress (mattress, mattress)  
I only want sympathy in the form of you crawling into bed with me

"Maybe you can crawl in bed with Pete, since I heard him and Ashley are taking a break," Brooke said jokingly.

_Dance, Dance  
We're falling apart to half time  
Dance, Dance  
And these are the lives you'd love to lead_

"I already have enough problems with guys thank you I don't need to add another one to the mix," Peyton told the brunette shaking her head at her.

_Dance this is the way they'd love (way they'd love)  
Dance this is the way they'd love (way they'd love)  
Dance this is the way they'd love  
If they knew how misery loved me_

Dance, Dance  
Dance, Dance  
Dance, Dance

_Dance, Dance_

"Have you heard from Derek lately?" Brooke asked nervously.

"No but I'm sure he's fine, just prolly really busy. Don't worry Brooke he really likes you. I bet as soon as he gets some free time he'll respond to you little love letter," Peyton told her compassionately.

"You're such a angel," Brooke said sarcastically narrowing her eyes.

"Yep the angel of death, you better watch out Brooke you never know when I'm coming for you," Peyton said putting her hands in front of her like a ghost and walking closer to the brunette.

"Don't make me get Skills or Lucas," Brooke retaliated as the two girls glared at each other.

--

Nathan was standing at the bar waiting for Haley to get back from the bathroom when a feminine voice purred in his ear.

"Hi sexy," the woman said wearing a red string bikini with a very short red cape tied around her neck.

"What are you suppose to be?" Nathan asked staring at the light brunette in front of him in distaste.

"Little red riding hood of course, wanna save me from the big bad wolf?" She asked seductively as Nathan just looked at her in disbelief.

"No," He told her looking away. Instead of leaving she moved so she was standing in front of him.

"Oh its cause you don't know my name right?" The woman asked sauntering up to him as he tried to back away, but was met by the bar blocking him from escaping. "It's Carrie" She told him smiling before putting her arms around his neck.

Haley watched in jealousy as she saw another woman putting her hands on her boyfriend. _Who would've thought I would be so possessive, but I want to yank that bitch's hair so she's away from my guy,_ she asked herself. She watched the scene unfold and had to hold in her laughter as she saw Nathan removing the skanks arms away from him and what seemed to be telling her off. Sneakily walking to him she heard the last part of what he said.

"Look Carrie I don't want you, I have a girlfriend and you just look like a slut so go try and find someone else cause I don't want you and never will." Nathan said looking down at the woman like she was scum.

Haley could see Carrie was fuming and decided to make her presence known. Marching up to Nathan she pushed the slut out of the way and possessively fused her lips together with Nathan, letting the bimbo know he was off limits.

Nathan swiped his tongue against her lips, before slipping it into Haley's mouth and dominating the kiss. His hand went to squeeze her ass suggestively letting anyone else know that he was off limits and warning the guys not to come near his angel. The two tongues dueled together as they each got lost in the other forgetting about the rest of the people in the club. Pulling away to catch their breaths Nathan's lips trailed along her cheeks before going to work on her neck.

Looking around Haley realized where they were and pushed Nathan away embarrassed.

"We shouldn't be doing this here," She scolded as Nathan gave her his trademark smirk.

"Than lets leave," He propositioned giving her his puppy dog eyes.

Nibbling on her bottom lip Haley thought about what would happen if they were to leave. The last time they were alone they made out, but it was getting really heated until Brooke called interrupting them. _Okay depending what this next song is we'll leave,_ Haley thought to herself as she waited for the DJ to play the next song since Fall Out Boy was over with.

_We're both looking for something  
That we've been afraid to find  
It's easier to be broken  
It's easier to hide_

Looking at you, holding my breath,  
For once in my life, I'm scared to death,  
I'm taking a chance, letting you inside.

_I have my answer I have to let him inside even if it scares me _she thought before taking Nathan's hand in her and intertwining their finger, walking with him to his car. She knew Brooke saw them leaving and would inform the others so they wouldn't get worried about her.

They two drove to her house as she sat nervously in her seat. Ironically the same song that was on in Tric was the same as the radio station they were currently listening to.

_I'm feeling alive all over again,  
As deep as the sky, under my skin  
Like being in love, she says  
For the first time  
Well maybe I'm wrong,  
But I'm feeling right where I belong  
With you tonight  
Like being in love  
Can feel for the first time_

The world that I see inside you  
Waiting to come to life  
Waking me up to dreaming  
Reality in your eyes

This song defiantly described how she felt about Nathan. She knew she was falling in love with him and for the first time in her life she felt that she was right where she belonged. Even though it scared her she was ready to give herself to him. Completely.

_Looking at you,  
Holding my breath,  
For once in my life  
I'm scared to death,  
I'm taking a chance,  
Letting you inside._

The two made their way into Haley's house with Nathan following behind Haley. He figured they would watch a movie and probably make out. He was scared that he had only known her a short while and felt that she probably knew him better than anyone else. He was falling hard and fast for the angel walking ahead of him and even if he was scared he wasn't going to pull away from her no matter what.

"So we going to watch a movie?" Nathan asked walking into the living room.

"I thought we could do something else," Haley said nervously nibbling on her bottom lip and twirling her pinkie ring as she looked at Nathan lustfully.

Nathan felt his breath hitch and his heart beat frantically, mesmerized at her standing before him so innocently beautiful. He could feel himself getting harder at her innuendo and taking a few strides was in front of her leaning down he kissed her softly.

"I don't want to push you." He repeated his words from earlier.

"You aren't" Haley replied as Nathan kissed her a little more forcedly this time.

Haley kissed him back, before breaking away and taking her angel wings and halo off and throwing them on the floor next to the staircase. Nathan whipped off his mask and kissed her hungrily this time as the two tried making their way upstairs, without breaking the kiss. They finally made it to Haley's bedroom and he laid her on the bed, before climbing on top slowing down and sensually kissing her.

Nathan slid his hand up her thigh as their tongues danced together. Breaking away from her lips Nathan planted butterfly kisses around her face before trailing his lips to her neck and sucking on her pulse point. He had found out from earlier make out sessions it was one of her weak spots. Haley gripped his back at the wonderful things his mouth did to hers as she arched her head back and tilted it to the side to give him better access. Sucking on her delicate neck, bruising it slightly, before swiping his tongue over it and cooling it down.

Her body hummed and felt on fire as she chewed her bottom lip between her teeth to stop the moan from escaping. Her hands moved from his shoulders to the zipper on the back of the costume. The bulky costume he had on was getting in her way of feeling his skin on hers and her fingers itched to touch his defined muscles. Stopping his attack on her neck he helped her take off the batman costume and threw it on the floor leaving him in only a pair of blue plaid boxers.

Dipping his head back down he captured her mouth with his and began nibbling on her bottom lip before sliding his tongue in her mouth and probing around. His hand kneaded her breast over the white dress, as the other one toyed with the curls of her hair and started kissing down the valley of her breast stopping when he got to the silky white dress. He moved his head to her shoulder where the thin strap holding her dress was and slowly moved it off kissing along the way, before doing the same on the other side. His rough, calloused hand that was kneading her breast moved down to trail up her leg before sliding it up her inner thigh and making sure she was wet for him.

Grabbing the bottom of the white dress he pushed it up and saw her wearing white, lacy, bikini panties, and a matching lacy, white strapless bra. Hungrily his lips attacked her stomach as his hand started to fondle her breast through the lacy fabric. His lips connected to her breast over the material, where her nipples were straining to get out, feeling himself getting harder with each second passing. Straddling her he grabbed the bottom of the dress and pulled it up and over her head before going back to ravishing her as she tangled their legs together and ran her hands up and down his back, feeling the taunt muscles rippling under her fingers.

Reaching a hand behind her he expertly unclasped the bra before bringing his mouth to her pert rosebud nipple, and sucking on it ravenously. Moving one of her hands away from his back she fisted it in his hair pulling him against her even more. Leaving her breasts, Nathan kissed down her body swirling his tongue around her belly button before continuing his journey and kissing along where her underwear rested on her hips. Using two fingers he slid it down her legs kissing her body as the underwear slid off and throwing them on the floor haphazardly, before kissing his way back up her inner thigh and landing on apex of her thigh. Nathan smirked when she gasped in shock and slid two fingers into her wet folds; Haley arched her back in pleasure, needing him desperately. She felt the ache between her legs, before he started sliding his digits in and out of her in a rapid pace. Fisting her hands in his hair she felt her first orgasm hit powerfully.

"Oh god Nathan," Haley moaned breathlessly.

As he moved his mouth to lap up the juices between her legs, he tasted something that was only her. Haley couldn't believe how good his tongue felt on her. Pulling his head up to hers she kissed him deeply. Their tongues dueled. Raking her nails over his chest Haley slid his boxers off wanting to feel him buried deep inside her and using her feet to push them all the way off. Grabbing a condom off the dresser Nathan rolled it along his hard length and positioned himself at Haley's entrance.

Locking eyes Nathan intertwined their fingers, before kissing her again and thrusting inside. The two moved in sync as he plunged himself in her, before moving in and out. The friction making a thin layer of sweat on their bodies. Haley squeezed his hand's tighter at the feel of him inside if her, moaning out loud when he hit the entrance to her womb, and she unintentionally squeezed her internal muscles around him; making him groan into her mouth.

Their bodies moved in a rhythm only life long lovers seem to find, her moans met his grunts as he continued to thrust his body against hers. She had never felt this way with Josh. He could feel it at the base of his spine, that tell tale tingling before he reached his peek, but he wanted her with him. Always with him. Back in high school he hadn't cared whether the girl had gotten pleasure as long as he got off, but with Haley he wanted to fall into oblivion with her. So he wrapped his arms under her knees, pushing her legs further backwards, his length now hitting her clit on every down stroke, turning her moans into uncontrollable cries as his grunts turned into heavy groans of her name as he emptied everything he had deep inside of her. They both collapsed onto the bed, a breathless tangled sweaty mess of limbs, before he lazily pulled her to him and kissed the top of her head lovingly.

"That was wow," Haley said snuggling into his side even more.

"I know," Nathan replied cockily as Haley playfully swatted his bare chest.

Haley bit her lip before sliding her foot up and down his leg as he looked over at her with his eyes half closed. Moving her leg she quickly straddled him before bending down and fusing their mouths together as their tongues battled feverously and the room seemed to get hotter than it already was. Haley sank down onto him and they both fell into that passion filled heaven once again and that's how they spent the rest of the night, before drifting off to sleep together with his arms holding her tight against his body and never wanting to let her go.

--

A loud banging on the door jerked Haley awake from her dream. Looking at the arm holding her possessively, a smile appeared on her face as she tried to wiggle out from underneath it to go see who was at the door. Nathan feeling her trying to get out of his arms tightened his grasp.

"Nathan," She said as he smirked pulling her closer.

"No leave," he said burying his head in the crook of her neck.

Haley smiled at the gesture before the loud banging broke through the silence once again. "I have to go someone's at the door. I'll be right back I promise," Haley said giving his lips a peck before getting out of bed and throwing on a pair of pajama shorts and a tank top_._

_I wonder who's at the door,_ Haley thought since she wasn't expecting anyone and making her way down the stairs. Opening the door she was surprised at the curly mess standing before her.

"Peyt what's wrong?" Haley asked worriedly seeing the red-rimmed eyes of her best friend.

"I…I don't know what to do anymore," Peyton said choking back a sob.

"What happened?" Haley asked concerned ushering the blonde into the house.

"I…I dunno…" Peyton said walking inside and sitting on the couch in the living room with her head in her hands.

"Hey Hales who was at the door?" Nathan asked walking down the stairs in a pair of boxers and running a hand through his rumpled hair.

"Oh god I'm so sorry," Peyton said looking between the two and then seeing the mask and angel wings lying next to the stairs, before bolting to the door and flinging it open. Her mouth going agape when she saw the guy on the other side holding another blonde's hand and having the other about to raise to knock on the door.

"Jake?" Peyton said, her eyes widening in shock and clutching her stomach feeling like she'd just been sucker punched.


	12. I’m Going to Stop Pretending

**HJS-NS-23- Hey I want to thank everyone for reviewing because they defiantly keep me going. This chapter is dedicated to Emma and Steph for pushing me to get it done before I go to visit my great grandma for the night. I hope you enjoy and I am so excited for everyone's reactions so please review! The song I used besides the title is When it all Falls Apart by The Veronicas. Both of these songs are great and I recommend you listen to them, while they are used in the story. I hope you enjoy this chapter and please review.**

**Song- **I'm Going to Stop Pretending that I Didn't Break your Heart by eels

**Quote-**Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up.

-Hans Christian Andersen

* * *

_"Jake?" Peyton said, her eyes widening in shock and clutching her stomach feeling like she'd just been sucker punched._

"Hey Blondie," He said endearingly as she looked back and forth between him and Haley, who had ran behind her to stop her from leaving. Seeing the shocked look on Haley's face she knew the brunette didn't know that Jake would be showing up on her doorstep.

"I…I gotta go," Peyton said still clutching her stomach and brushing past Jake and the blonde, running to her comet before driving off recklessly.

"Shit," Haley muttered running after her. "Peyton," She yelled running to the end of the driveway, watching as her best friend blow through a red stoplight.

Walking back to the door Haley painted a smile on her face. "Jake it's great to see you," She said closing the gap between the two and giving him a friendly hug. "Come on in," She added ushering the 2 people into her house, before giving a worried look over her shoulder where Peyton had driven off.

Walking into the house she was glad that Nathan was in a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. He had left the clothes at her house a few days ago because he was suppose to meet Lucas and Skills at the River court, but instead it had rained so the guys had cancelled.

"So how have you been?" She asked walking into the dining room and sitting down. Jake and the blonde following suit across from her and Nathan sitting next to her.

"Good…you?" Jake asked curiously. It had been 2 years since the two had talked.

"Good," Haley said smiling brightly at Nathan as he reached underneath the table and took his hand in hers gently interlacing their fingers and giving her hand a gentle squeeze. "This is Nathan…my boyfriend." Haley told Jake biting the inside of her cheek nervously awaiting Jake's response. This was Josh's brother and she didn't want Jake to think she moved on to fast or anything.

"That's great." Jake said smiling. "How long have you guys been going out?" He asked inquiringly. "About 2 months," Haley told him relieved he didn't seem mad.

"I can see he makes you happy Hales and Josh would've wanted you to be happy again." Jake told her insightful.

"Thank you. So whose the blonde?" Haley asked inquisitively looking at the petite blonde sitting on Jake's lap.

"This is my daughter Jenny." He told her as her eyes widened in shock and her mouth dropped open.

"Oh! Ummm… wow you have a kid…how…umm how old is she?" Haley asked trying not to jump to conclusions about Jake's faithfulness to her best friend. But the child looked so young.

"She's 27 months." Jake said hugging the little girl closer to his chest and praying Haley wouldn't do the math in her head.

"Josh…Josh died 36 months ago on October 18th, and you were dating Peyton then…were you…I mean did you cheat on Peyton?" Haley asked, gripping the table nervously and fearful of his answer after calculating the math in her head quickly. After all she was the valedictorian in high school and math was one of her strong suits after English.

"Yes," Jake responded looking down at the table in shame.

Anger flashed in Haley's brown eyes as she felt her whole body tremble.

"YOU CHEATED ON MY BEST FRIEND," she roared furiously, momentarily forgetting about the young child being in the room, who curled up in her father's chest petrified.

Quickly calming herself down she silently begged Nathan to take the little girl somewhere else.

"Hey Jenny do you wanna go outside and play?" Nathan asked nicely looking at the little girl.

Apprehensively looking at her father and the other woman in the room she nestled further into Jake's warmth.

"No," Jenny said not wanting to leave her father.

"You can go baby. Nathan will make sure you have lots of fun. Daddy has to talk to Haley alone. It'll be okay," Jake whispered caringly into his daughter's ear before handing her to Nathan.

"Bye Daddy," The little girl softly whispered shyly.

"So do you like Disney movies?" Nathan asked nervously walking into the backyard.

--

After hearing the back door slam shut Haley stood up and made her way to the kitchen trying to calm herself down and get a glass of water. Contemplating going after her, Jake decided to try and defend himself.

"Haley," Jake said tentatively stepping into the big kitchen and looking at her like a lost puppy.

"Don't you fuckin' Haley me any bullshit. You cheated on my best friend! When?" Haley asked glaring at Jake with her hand on her hip and pursing her lips together from saying anything more. She wanted answers and she wanted them now.

"A few days after Josh's funeral." Jake whispered apprehensively.

"I can't believe you, a few days after you're brother dies, you go to some bar and meet a random slut and have sex with her, while you're girlfriend is consoling her best friend who lost her boyfriend, almost fiancée. I'm guessing Peyton doesn't know since what just happened out front, so either you tell her or I will," Haley said calmly but sternly, while shooting daggers at Jake.

Jake was beyond terrified of Haley right now. If she was yelling that would be okay, but when she used the calm voice and glaring, then it was big. You never wanted to get Haley James that mad at you because it would take more than an apology for her to forgive you.

"You can't tell her!" Jake told her nervously knowing that the wrath of Peyton might kill him. "I …I just need time please!" He begged pleading with her to tell Peyton in his own time and way.

"Fine, but you better do it soon because if you don't I will and I promise I will help her hunt you down so she can kick your lying, cheating ass." Haley huffed out angrily.

"Okay I'll tell her, but I need her address so when I get the courage I know where to find her," Jake told her knowing that he had to man up to his mistakes, even if the result of that night invaded his life and made it better. He did regret cheating on Peyton, she didn't deserve it, but he would never regret his daughter. Haley quickly scribbled Peyton's address on a piece of paper and handed it to Jake before turning her back on him.

Jake walked outside and got Jenny from Nathan before leaving.

--

Lucas was walking out of his mom's café when he saw Peyton run a red light. Looking at the stoplight next to him he noticed it was green and waited nervously to see what she would do.

Peyton saw the green light and stopped. Whenever her life got hectic or the stress of her life became too much she would run red lights through out town. She had promised Haley she wouldn't do it again after Josh's accident, but seeing Jake with the blonde pushed her over the edge. Plus today was the anniversary of ...no she couldn't even think of the person who died, shaking her head sadly.

Lucas saw her stop at the green light and before he knew it his feet were dragging him to her car and he was wrenching the door open before sitting in the passenger seat.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked concerned, as the tears seemed to fall from her pretty green eyes.

"If I were you, I'd get back out now," Peyton told him warningly at the next green light. She knew the next 3 lights were hooked together, so if one was red they all would be.

"Not until you tell me what's going on." He told her adamantly. As soon as the light turned red she pushed the petal to the metal and blew through the set without a bat of an eyelash. Lucas stared at the broken woman in front of him. "Come on! Slow down, Peyton! Come on! Slow the car down! Peyton? Slow the car down." He said trying desperately to get her attention, which seemed miles away.

"She was driving to school to pick me up. She was late, so she ran a red light. It was one red light at the wrong split second and it ended for her. My mom ran one red light. Josh was driving to Haley's and died at a stoplight, someone just hit him, without caring and fleeing the scene letting him die! I used to run red lights all the time and nothing happened to me. Josh wasn't even drunk, he was just turning and someone hit him! Stoplights ruin my life. It's not fair that so many people have to die because of stoplights! It's not fair!" Peyton yelled emotionally letting the tears run down her cheeks and doing nothing to brush them away finally stepping on the brake and stopping the car, her breathing erratically.

"No, it's not." Lucas agreed not knowing what to say. He might a writer and that meant he was gifted with words, but in situations like this words just seemed to vanish. Instead he comfortingly put his hand on hers and squeezed it gently.

"You can leave," Peyton said slipping her hand out of Lucas' grip and staring out at the road stretched in front of her.

"Or I can stay if you want." He offered not wanting to leave her when she was in so much pain.

"No, I can't. I have to do this on my own," She said stubbornly ferociously wiping the tears off her face and making her eyes expressionless so he wouldn't see all the pain she was in.

Against his better judgment he got out of the car and saw her speed her way down the road, his heart aching for the broken blonde, who consumed his thoughts everyday.

Peyton continued on the road before pulling into the school's parking lot. She wanted to keep busy so she wouldn't have to be reminded of seeing Jake and that blonde holding hands. Grading artwork and planning lessons seemed to be the easiest thing to do. She knew if she started drawing she would just end up bawling again. _I can't believe I just broke down in front of Lucas like that. He must think I'm such a baby. I'm so stupid. I just…I can't believe Jake showed up after 3 years especially with a child. I wonder if that's his. What if it is?_ Peyton's jumbled thoughts consumed her and she was surprised when she looked up and was standing outside her classroom.

Unlocking the door she walked in and turned her computer on, opening her music she opened all her songs and let the computer randomly pick the song, letting the melody soothe her before realizing what the lyrics were saying.

_I'm having the day from hell,  
It was all going so well (before you came)  
And you told me you needed space,  
With a kiss on the side my face (not again)  
And not to mention (the tears I've shed)  
When I should have kicked your (ass instead)  
I need intervention  
Attention to stop temptation to scream_

Singing along to the song she couldn't believe how true the lyrics fit with her life. She could remember the break up like it was yesterday. _I should've told him, but it's to late now, _she thought sadly rubbing her stomach before sitting down and letting herself weep for the life she could've had.

_Cause baby  
Everything is f'd up straight from the heart  
Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart  
Gotta pick myself up where do I start  
'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart  
No..._

_Don't know where I parked my car  
Don't know who my real friends are (anymore)  
I put my faith in you  
What a stupid thing to do (when it rains it pours)  
And not to mention (I drank too much)  
I'm feeling hung over (and out of touch)  
I need intervention  
Attention to stop temptation to scream_

Skills was walking the halls when he head the music blaring. It was such a sad song, he wanted to make sure whoever was listening to it was okay. Walking closer to where the music was coming from he realized it was Peyton's room. Cautiously walking into the room his heart broke, seeing the curly blonde weeping and moving her lips along with the lyrics.

"Curly fry?" Skills asked tentatively trying not the startle her, but doing so anyways. "Are you okay?" He asked walking to her.

"I'm just so confused…I mean last night and then today at Haley's house Jake showed up with…and I…I didn't get to tell him after we broke up…and I…I dunno what to do!" Peyton babbled incoherently before staring up at Skills brokenly, as tears formed in his eyes at seeing how much hurt the girl he had known forever was in. The girl that he could possibly be in love with.

Skills didn't know what to say; instead he just wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly in his chest, secretly vowing that he would do anything to make sure she would always be happy. He didn't know what happened with Jake when they broke up or even today when she mentioned Jake showing up at Haley's house, but he knew it was bad.

"It'll be okay Peyton. You have Haley and I. We've been through so much with you already, remember we'll always be here for you, no matter what," He whispered soothingly while caressing her hair gently, the music being the only sound in the room besides her sniffling.

_Cause baby  
Everything is f'ed up straight from the heart  
Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart  
Gotta pick myself up where do I start  
'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart  
No..._

_Can it be easier?  
Can I just change my life?  
Cause it just seems to go bad everytime  
Will I be mending?  
Another one ending once again_

Peyton just sat in Skills arms letting him comfort her as her life with Jake flashed by, but standing out perfectly was the breakup and how ruthless he was. He was just so cold hearted. Here she had been taking care of Haley because her parents had bought an R.V and she had no one to console her. She just figured Jake would want to be with John and his parents, grieving over Josh together. She figured after a week he would be ready for her to help him heal. I guess I was wrong she thought bitterly.

_Everything is f'd up straight from the heart  
Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart  
Gotta pick myself up where do I start  
'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart  
No  
Everything is f'ed up straight from the heart  
Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart  
Gotta pick myself up where do I start  
'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart_

_Falls apart  
Gotta pick myself out cause things are messed up_

_Everything is f'd up straight from the heart  
Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart  
Gotta pick myself up where do I start  
'Cause I can't turn to you when it all..._

--

Brooke was sitting in her room writing another letter to Derek when her cell rang. Quickly jumping up to answer it she looked down and noticed it was a blocked number. Her curiosity getting the better of her she flipped it open and answered.

"Hello?" Brooke spoke intrigued.

"Brooke?" A male's voice rang out through the earpiece.

"Derek?" Brooke asked her voice lacing surprise, and her heartbeat speeding up rapidly.

"Yea it's me…" He said but was cut off by Brooke.

"How are you? Are you okay? Why haven't you written me? Are you allowed to be calling me?" Brooke rambled out, a sign she had been hanging out with Haley too much.

"I'm dealing and yes I can call, but only for a few minutes. We get timed calls and I just needed to hear your voice. I miss you." He told her softly hating how this one girl could make him feel so vulnerable.

"I miss you too," Brooke said tears of joy cascading down her cheeks with a smile on her face.

"So how are you?" He asked knowing she was probably having a difficult time since he hadn't been able to write her and she would probably freak out, unless she talked to Peyton and she informed her that sometimes he didn't have time to write.

"I'm okay. The shop is doing great to. I can't wait to see you," She told him honestly.

"I know how's Peyton and Haley?" He asked curiously looking at the clock and realizing his time was almost up and he should ask about his sister and her best friend.

"They're good. Peyton still doesn't have a boyfriend and Haley and Nathan are dating," Brooke said feeling more in her element at the gossip she was sharing with her boyfriend.

"That's good. Although I guess now I will have to give a talk to Nathan. All my girls are looking out for each other right?" He questioned as he fiddled with a picture he had taken of Brooke.

"Yep," Brooke answered with a dimpled smile.

"I'm so…" Derek started to say but a load of gunshots cut him off, as she heard guys scurrying around in the background, panic began to build in Brooke.

"Derek…" She yelled in the phone. "DEREK" She shouted frantically panicked as more gunshots were heard before all she heard was the dreaded dial tone.

--

After Jake and Jenny left, Nathan and Haley had gone out to lunch at his mom's café so she could order Macaroni and cheese, before going to rent movies to watch back at her house. They were currently watching the new movie The Other Boelyn Sister, Haley's choice. Nathan could tell when he found her in the kitchen she was upset and mentioned the idea of just staying in and watching movies, which made a small smile come on her face.

Haley was snuggled into Nathan's chest watching the movie. "I can't believe she could do that to her sister," Haley said shaking her head in Nathan's chest, while watching the movie.

Instead of answering her Nathan captured her lips with his. He couldn't believe he had lasted that long without kissing her. Haley kissed him back letting her tongue roam around his mouth. He quickly moved them so he was laying on top of her. Letting his hands meander under her shirt before moving to the hem and yanking it off only breaking the kiss when it had to go over her head, before going back and attacking her lips hungrily his hand lifting her off the couch so his other one could reach behind her and expertly unclasp her bra letting her breast out of the restraining garment.

Haley moved her hands under his t-shirt and pulled it off before her dainty hands moved to the waist band of his basketball shorts and boxers, using her feet to push them down as her hands wandered over his taunt muscles. Nathan moved his mouth to her neck and sucked on it before moving lower on her and taking her breast in his mouth, he licked and sucked, before swiping his tongue over her nipple, making her moan at the sensations as his other hand kneaded and massaged the other breast. Her back arched up in pleasure her hands gripping his short locks. He couldn't believe he waited so long for something so perfect.

Now that he had Haley he wasn't going to let her go without a fight. He moved his mouth lower now kissing his way down the valley of her breast, before swirling his tongue around her belly button emitting a small squeal from Haley. Continuing down he kissed her body until he stopped on the waist of her jeans. Kissing where her jeans sat he used a finger and flicked the button undone before using his teeth and pulling the zipper down.

Moving his hand from her breast he slid the jeans and panties off her together before slipping a finger in her folds making sure she was wet and ready for him. All of a sudden a flash of lightning shone in the room followed by thunder rumbling outside. Some time during them fooling around it had started to storm. Haley felt the ache between her legs grow and tired of waiting for him to enter her, she grabbed his face and brought it to hers giving him a earth shattering kiss and silently pleading him with her eyes to enter her. Standing up he pushed his basketball shorts completely off leaving Haley feeling cold as the warmth of his body left hers, before quickly coming back and covering her body with his. Pulling a condom out of his wallet that was on the table, he slipped in on and intertwining their hands, he entered her in one quick thrust.

The storm raged on outside as he pounded into her. Haley wrapped her legs around him tightly, using her heels to push him to go deeper inside. The storm raged on outside as the other Boelyn Sister played on the TV, but all the two could hear was the heavy panting, moaning and groaning with their slick bodies becoming one as Haley moaned and urged Nathan to go harder and faster. Nathan changed his angle a little so that this time when he was thrusting he hit her clit every time as Haley felt her orgasm rip screaming his name, feeling Haley clench her tight walls around him and hearing her scream his name was his undoing as he felt his orgasm hit and they flew over the edge together. Nathan pushed himself up on his arms, so he wouldn't crush her and started peppering her face with kisses. He loved watching her when they made love and the way her eyes sparkled.

Holding on to her he flipped them over so he was on the bottom, while she was sprawled on top of him. Haley grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around the two as Nathan reached for the remote and turned the movie off. The only sound now was the rain pelting on the windows and roof.

Haley nestled into Nathan's chest and had just closed her eyes when she heard him whisper into her ear.

"Marry me!"

--

After breaking down again Peyton felt like a big baby. She drove home and was surprised when she saw Jake and the blonde standing at her door. Quickly parking she walked up to her door and opened it, not saying a word to Jake and pretending she didn't see him.

"Peyton can we please talk?" Jake pleaded fearing the conversation they were about to have.

"Fine," Peyton conceited unlocking the door before walking inside. "You can put her over there on the couch if you want," Peyton said motioning towards her couch before closing the door. Jake gently laid Jenny, who was sucking on her thumb sleeping peacefully, on the couch before walking back to Peyton.

"So whose the blonde?" Peyton asked right away keeping her face emotionless.

"My daughter," Jake told her seeing the shock in her eyes, before she pulled the curtain back over her eyes.

"And what're you doing here Jake?" Peyton asked slightly annoyed at the brown haired boy in front of her. "Trying to break me more?" She asked angrily.

"No, I wanted to tell you the real reason why I broke up with you…" Jake said looking at the ground.

_I'm gonna tell you what you need to hear  
And I'm a little too late  
By three or four years  
And it may not make much sense  
Now that we are apart  
But I'm going to stop pretending  
That I didn't break your heart_

"Cause you cheated on me with some slut and knocked her up?" Peyton hissed out venomously. She was trying to keep her voice low so they didn't wake the little girl.

"Peyt…" Jake started to say, but was cut off.

"No you can't call me Peyt anymore. Only my friend's do. Not lying, cheating scum like you!" Peyton spat out.

"Peyton just let me talk!" Jake said exasperated trying to tell his side of the story. "A few nights after Josh died all you did was hang out with Haley and comfort her…"

"Are you saying this is my fault?" Peyton asked narrowing her eyes and crossing her arms in a defensive stance.

"No…but my brother just died, I could've used my girlfriend and all you cared about was Haley!" Jake spoke bitterly.

"I can't believe you are fucking saying that to me!" Peyton said boiling. "I'm such a selfish person I was comforting my friend, figuring my boyfriend would need a week to get his head straightened out, before he would even consider letting me help him heal and spend time with his brother John and his parents! You're right I am so fucking selfish," Peyton said furiously, glaring at him and throwing her hands up in the air.

"Peyton just let me tell the damn story!" Jake said irate with her twisting his words so he looked like the bad guy.

"Fine just hurry up I have things to do," Peyton said going back into her defensive stand and looking at him with a straight face.

"Anyways I was at a bar shooting back beers, trashed off my butt when this brunette came up to me and bought me a beer. Her name was Nikki. After a couple more drinks I was completely drunk and she invited me over. We had sex and when I woke up in the morning, I saw where I was and remembered what happened. I immediately regretted it. I never meant to cheat on you Peyton. I love you." Jake told her honestly as Peyton snorted in response.

"Yea if you loved me, you could've called me instead of going to some bar and getting drunk," Peyton told him shaking her head in disappointment. She loved Jake, he was the only boy she had ever loved and she had envisioned herself getting married to him. Her and Haley would marry the Jagielski boys and finally be sisters and live happily ever after. Yea until reality hit her and Jake broke up with her.

"You were to busy taking care of Haley!" Jake told her resentfully.

"You're right so I deserved to get cheated on. You're an asshole! I hate you," Peyton yelled shaking with anger as the tears started to fall down her cheeks.

"Why are you twisting everything I am saying?" Jake asked frustrated.

"I'm not! But why show up now 3 years later to tell me you cheated on me? Huh? To ease your guilt? Well to bad because you broke my fucking heart and you can deal with that guilt just like the guilt I have to live with every fucking day!

_You see I never thought enough of myself  
To realize that losing me could mean  
Something like the tears in your eyes  
And I want to tell you I'm sorry  
And it's too late to start  
But I'm going to stop pretending  
That I didn't break your heart_

"I wanted to tell you because I need you in my life Peyton. I miss you and I just got full custody of Jenny. I wish every night that you can just forgive me for one drunken mistake and we can be a family. I regret sleeping with Nikki, but I don't regret Jenny, after losing you she's the only light in my life. We can raise her together and be a family. I love you Peyton!" Jake told her sincerely.

_And it's Christmas eve  
Years down the line  
Sitting here wishing I'd treated you better  
When you were mine  
And I have no way of knowing where you are  
But I'm going to stop pretending  
That I didn't break your heart_

Peyton felt her heart clench in her chest. She couldn't believe him. How could she ever trust him again? He cheated on her and instead of coming to her and telling her he felt like she abandoned him. Her mouth opened and closed with no words coming out, before she finally found her voice.

"Do you remember what you said to me?" Peyton asked in disbelief.

"Just that we should break up," Jake said knowing how he had worded it was a lot worse, but hoping she didn't remember exactly how harsh he had been with her. You said and I quote 'Peyton we should break up' and when I asked why you yelled at me for being a fucking drama queen! I just…you hurt me Jake… and I don't think I can ever forgive you. Especially now that you cheated on me." Peyton said shaking her head as the tears continued to fall.

_I didn't mean to hurt you  
I didn't know what I was doing  
but I know what I have done_

"Peyton I didn't mean to hurt you, I was just angry and so scared that I cheated on you. I mean I promised I would never hurt you and I had just cheated on you. A month later Nikki called and told me she was pregnant. I wanted to keep the baby and we were going to arrange joint custody of her, but the day Jenny was able to be released…Nikki took off leaving me with Jenny. I had to juggle a baby and learn to be a dad, before I could come find you. Nikki came back when Jenny was 6 months old and tried taking her from me. She was so horrible to her Peyton…I had to get my daughter before I could come and get you. I didn't mean to hurt you I just felt so bad that I cheated on you. Please just say you'll be with me again please!" Jake begged his heart aching for the curly blonde.

"I'm glad you got custody of her because you're probably a great dad but…I can't be a family with you Jake…" Peyton said more disappointed than angry.

"Why?" Jake begged figuring she missed him just as much as he had been missing her.

"Because…because we should be raising our child together. I found out I was pregnant after we broke up," Peyton told a stunned Jake.

"We have a child?" Jake asked.


	13. Tears in Heaven

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone I want to thank you for all the reviews I was getting a little worried cause my reviews were dropping, but you all made me feel better as I read your comments. I hope you like this chapter it's starting to get closer to the drama and away from the fluff. I hope this chapter is written good enough for you guys because you deserve the best and I've never gone through this situation and wouldn't wish it on anyone. Thank you to everyone who reviewed and I hope you like this chapter and please leave your comments or suggestions. Enjoy.**

**Song:** Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton

**Quote:** "In this world, one day death is going to take the life from everything that you love. So while you're able, love what you have. Takes the death from your life."

-Mercy Ealing to Joe Carpenter

* * *

_"Derek…" She yelled in the phone. "DEREK," She shouted frantically panicked as more gunshots were heard before all she heard was the dreaded dial tone._

_Ohmygod what the hell happened. Please let him be okay,_ Brooke begged before pinching herself and making sure she wasn't just having a nightmare. _He has to be okay!_ She cried sitting up and grabbing the pillow next to her and sobbing in it, as all she could think was that Derek was dead. _I love him! I haven't even known him that long, but I do. He has to be okay,_ she sobbed, her body trembling in fear and uncertainty. _Shit I have to tell Peyton so she doesn't get surprised if some marines show up on her door, _Brooke thought running to her closet and putting on her matching clos over bros zip up sweatshirt that matched the sweatpants she was wearing, before grabbing her cell and car keys and running to her car.

Making her way to Peyton's she rehearsed what she was going to say. She didn't know how to warn the broody girl what happened. She just knew she had to get there before the marines did.

--

_Haley nestled into Nathan's chest and had just closed her eyes when she heard him whisper into her ear._

"_Marry me!"_

Her eyes opened in shock. She looked at Nathan whose eyes were closed and his breathing steadily. Scrunching her eyebrows in confusion she whispered his name to see if he was just faking sleeping. "Nathan, Nathan," She whispered. Not getting an answer she listened to his even breathing and realized he was sleeping and she had just dreamt the whole thing up.

_Why did I dream that though? Do I want to marry him? Do I love him? What's going on with me? If he asked me that would I marry him? I haven't known him that long, but he makes me feel a way that Josh never did. What the hell is wrong with me?_ _How could I say yes to him and have known him a shorter time than when I found out the Josh was going to propose to me? _Haley thought exasperated her mind going a million miles a minute as she stayed up thinking why she conjured him asking to marry her in her head. _I have to talk to Peyton,_ she decided.

Slowly slipping off Nathan and the couch she silently made her way to her room and threw on a pair of sweatpants, a tank top, and throwing her hair in a ponytail and tip toeing down the stairs, she slipped her feet into her favorite pair of flip flops by the door and quietly closing the door behind her so she didn't wake Nathan up.

Nathan felt Haley crawl over him and the slight creaking of the stairs, before he heard soft shuffle of her flip-flops before the door clicked close. Opening his eyes he wondered where she was going and what had just happened.

--

_"We have a child?" Jake asked._

"Can I see him or her?" Jake asked excitedly as the news sank in. He couldn't wait to see the life that he and Peyton had created. He always wanted Jenny to have a sibling and to find out that Peyton had carried his child made him happy.

"You can't see our daughter," Peyton said trying to keep her composure and not let Jake see what was under her mask.

"Damn it Peyton you can't keep her from me!" Jake yelled. "Please I want to see her. I'm sure Jenny would love to see her sister," He told her lowering his voice and pleading with her.

"You can see her in the future just not right now," Peyton said regretting her decision of telling him about Anna.

"She's my daughter, I have a right to see her now let me see her!" Jake screamed as a tear slipped down Peyton's cheek.

"You can't!" She yelled back her voice breaking emotionally.

"Why? What did you do abort the baby cause you were so pissed at me or did you relinquish all your rights? I know you didn't miscarry, cause that's just to hard to do after 5 months, and you have to be at least 5 months before you find out the sex of the baby, which you obviously fucking did! So what did you do?" Jake asked angrily.

"What did I do?" Peyton asked taking a step back in shock, her body trembling with the sting of his words.

"Yea?" Jake said wanting to know what happened.

"I miscarried," Peyton said looking him in the eye. Neither one at that moment had noticed a figure slip into the house. The figures mouth dropped open. She hadn't expected to ever hear that.

"I found out I was pregnant after you broke up with me! I…I was so happy because I thought I could always have a piece of you, my first love with me forever. When I found out I was pregnant I was already going on 3 months. With everything being so hectic I thought I was late, because of the stress and lack of sleep with Josh's death. I mean I was on the pill..." Peyton stopped talking closing her eyes and trying to regain her composure.

"After I found out I was pregnant…I was going to tell you…but I couldn't, not after how we ended things. So I called my dad and begged to go out on the boat with him and his company. After telling him the truth and a lot of pleading he finally said yes. I was 5 months and a week when we docked on shore, and I saw a doctor to tell me that I had a healthy little girl growing inside me." Peyton choked out as tears streamed down her face.

"What happened Peyton?" Jake asked nervously his gut twisting with nerves.

Peyton looked away from him her mind going back to that day. She was talking and she didn't even realize it she was telling him what happened.

_Flashback_

"_Daddy I'm having a little girl not a boy," Peyton laughed as her dad said he wanted the baby to go fishing with him._

"Well then she can still go fishing with me. After all you did when you were younger." Larry told his daughter.

"_Yea, I guess she can, I just want her to be healthy and happy. You know I didn't know I could love someone I haven't really met yet," Peyton told her father, a soft smile on her face, as she rubbed her slightly protruding belly affectionately. "I can't wait to introduce her to the world. You know I already have a name picked out for her. Anna Elizabeth Jagielski. After mom and Ellie and I want to give her Jake's last name." Peyton told her father._

"_I think you should tell him now so he's a part of the pregnancy," Larry told his only daughter after her mother died she was all he had left besides his new granddaughter now. "Just like I think you should tell Haley you're pregnant. She's your best friend kiddo, she deserves to know."_

"_I know daddy, but she just lost Josh I don't feel right giving her my happy news about my little blessing when Josh just died like a little over a month ago." Peyton said somberly._

"_I think she probably would need a little bit of good news, but it's your decision," He told her giving her a hug. _

"_Thanks Daddy," Peyton said as the rain started to fall on them. _

"_Hey Larry there's a big storm coming up," Eric one of the crewman called to the older man._

"_Thanks Eric." Larry called back before turning and facing his daughter. "Why don't you and my granddaughter get below deck, just to be safe?" Larry told her rubbing her protruding belly._

"_Okay daddy, be careful," Peyton warned before walking towards the back of the boat and to the stairs that would lead below deck. As she had been walking the rain fell harder drenching the hardwood deck floors and the figures trying to bring the sail in were struggling again the wind. Peyton tried walking faster as the boat rocked. She finally made it to the stairs and had just stepped on the first one when a gust of wind shook the boat. The bottom of her wet shoes hit the slick hardwood and she lost her balance falling down the stairs, getting knocked unconscious and landing in a heap at the bottom of the stairs._

_The weather raged on, as the guys worked quickly to make sure the boat would be okay. No one heard the thud as the thunder and lightning lit up the sky, or went to check on the curly blonde who laid unconscious on the floor, with a puddle of blood between her legs._

_Peyton opened her heavy eyes, her hand instinctively reaching for her daughter, as she looked around at her setting. Stark white walls and a machine beeping next to her. After looking around she concluded she was in a hospital. The last thing she remembered was slipping and quickly located the call button to make sure her daughter was okay. She just had to be. A few seconds after she pressed the button an older nurse came in._

"_It's great to see you awake. You have some people who were worried about you," The kind woman told her before checking her stats._

"_My daughter is okay right?" Peyton asked fearfully not caring about herself, but only her daughter's health._

"_Let me get the doctor for you," The gray haired nurse said before leaving the room and a panicked Peyton._

_She willed her daughter to start kicking so she could feel her inside her. She knew children didn't usually start kicking until 6 months, but she desperately needed to know her little girl was okay._

"_Hi Ms. Sawyer I'm Doctor Hargrove. I heard you were asking questions." The brown haired man spoke, his Australian accent prominent in his voice. _

"_My baby?" Peyton asked petrified. "Please tell me she's okay." Peyton begged, the tears starting to spill down her cheeks in anticipation and nerves._

"_After you fell you suffered from severe internal bleeding. We tried everything we could, but it was too late. I'm sorry Miss. Sawyer you suffered a miscarriage," Andy told the young woman._

"_No," Peyton said shaking her head in disbelief. "No," She screamed louder this time as the doctor just looked at the woman breaking down in front of him. _

"_We have a number of therapists you could talk to after facing such a tragedy," The doctor told her trying to ease the blonde._

"_I want my dad," Peyton told the doctor, venom laced in her voice and her arms crossed over her chest._

"_Miss. Sawyer I hate to give you any more bad news, but your father didn't make it off the boat. He sustained a severe blow to the head from one of the sails. It caused internal bleeding in his brain." _

"_So he's in a coma? Then let me go see him…" Peyton said trying to sit up as Andy rushed forward and pushed her gently back on the bed._

"_I'm sorry Miss. Sawyer, you're father passed away, while we were working on him."_

"_You're a bunch of doctors and you can't save 2 lives!" Peyton yelled the tears falling down her face rapidly as she glared at the doctor. "Why the fuck did any of you become doctors if all you're good at is not saving people? Huh?" Peyton screamed her body shaking in anger and pain._

_The machine that was monitoring her heart started beeping rapidly. "Miss. Sawyer you really need to calm down now." Doctor Hargrove told the young woman._

"_You want me to calm down? Then bring back my daughter and father! I can't lose them. I'm not strong enough! I can't do this on my own anymore," Peyton broke down as the doctor slipped out of the room and into the waiting room looking for the girl's best friend._

"_Peyt?" Haley asked nervously knocking on the door before pushing it open and seeing the broken blonde in front of her. "Oh god Peyt. I'm so sorry," Haley said rushing to the broken blonde and hugging her tightly. She didn't know how she would feel if she lost her father. The sobs racked the curly blonde's body as Haley tried to whisper soothing words._

_End Flashback_

"Haley never knew that I lost Anna that day. I just couldn't tell her. Just like I couldn't tell you. I didn't want you to have to go through the pain of losing another person you loved. I was trying to protect you two. You know there are days where I wake up hearing a baby crying."

Jake just stood there speechless. A few tears streaming down his face. The figure in the corner had her mouth covered with her hand as the tears ran down her face.

"I…I'm sorry Peyton. I'm sorry you had to go through that alone." Jake said sincerely.

"It's my fault I lost our daughter. If I wasn't selfish and ran away she would be here coloring or watching a movie with me," Peyton yelled guiltily, the tears falling down her cheeks rapidly as she sniffled.

"It's not your fault Peyton," Jake said trying to fix the broken girl in front of him.

"It is though," Peyton said adamently running her fingers through her hair roughly. "It's all my fault, no matter what anyone says it's my fault. I was her mother! I was supposed to protect her and I couldn't!" Peyton yelled letting everything out. "Everyone I love either dies or leaves!" She screamed.

The figure in the corner couldn't stand to see her friend in so much pain and ran to the broken blonde, crashing her in a fierce hug and letting her tears soak her tank top and shoulder. Soothing whispering words she let the blonde break down as Jake watched helplessly.

As pissed as she was at Peyton for not telling her about the baby, in a way she couldn't blame her. She was such a mess after Josh's death. She felt guilty that she wasn't there for Peyton in her time of need as much as Peyton was there for Josh's death. Haley helped her deal with her father's death, but she could tell now Peyton never stopped blaming herself for the death of her unborn daughter.

The little blonde girl, who had awoken when she heard the yelling sleepily walked towards her dad, her little thumb in her mouth and sucking on it. She looked at the two women who were clinging to each other for dear life, confused as she saw her dad wipe a tear from his face. Jenny wrapped her little arms about around Jake's leg, before he swooped down and picked up his little girl, clutching her tightly to his chest.

_I can't believe Peyton dealt with all this by herself. I can't believe I had another daughter. I wish she would've told me. I defiantly wasn't expecting this when I came to win her back_, he thought utterly shocked with the night's events.

Haley saw Jake holding his daughter and heard Peyton's sobbing settle down. Breaking the embrace and instead wrapping an arm around the curly blondes waist, she looked at Jake.

"I think you should go now," Haley whispered looking at Jake and pleading silently for him to leave without making a commotion about it.

"Okay, but Peyton tomorrow we need to talk," He told the blonde whose eyes were red and swollen from all the crying. "Here's my cell phone number," He told her handing her a slip of paper before walking out the door and leaving the best friends alone.

Haley slowly walked Peyton to her bedroom, knowing the blonde was in a daze over the night's events. Peyton's mind was back on the day where she lost her little girl and she couldn't help but feel guilty that she hadn't told Haley or Jake about Anna. She thought about how every night for a year she would listen to the song Tears in Heaven sung by Eric Clapton, and think of her daughter and praying that her parents were taking care of her until she was able to see her little girl. All she wanted to do was hold her daughter. She still woke up in nightmares from that day or dreams where her daughter was still alive.

As soon as Haley got in Peyton's bedroom she reached in the dresser for a pair of black sweatpants and a black tank top handing them to the blonde and walking downstairs to get her a glass of water, while she changed.

After changing into the pajama's Haley gave her, Peyton fell into her bed and waited for Haley to come back. Haley made it back to Peyton's room and gave her the water, which the blonde immediately gulped down half, before handing it back to Haley who put it on the dresser. Peyton looked up at Haley, pain and guilt showing in her broken green eyes as Haley wrapped her arms around Peyton and held her, as Peyton's body started to quake with more tears. The brunette just held her before she heard the even breathing beside her and knew the blonde had cried herself to sleep.

Listening to the even breathing Haley got up to go home so Nathan wouldn't worry about her and tip toed to the door. Pulling it open silently, a scream got caught in her throat.

"Brooke?" Haley whispered surprise evident in her voice as she looked at the other brunette. Her make up was smeared and her eyes red and puffy. Haley quickly went back into concerned friend mode and took the other girl in her arms.

"Haley it's bad," Brooke said looking brokenly at the other girl. "I need to talk to Peyton… I have to tell her about Derek," Brooke said starting to sob again on Haley's shoulder.

"Brooke, Brooke." Haley said pulling away so she could look into her friends sorrow filled hazel eyes, "What's wrong? What happened to Derek?"

"I...he...I was talking to him on the phone," Brooke said holding up her cell in a daze, "and then..."

"And then what?" Haley asked anxiously seeing the pain on Brooke's face.

"And then... then..." She sobbed, taking in quick breaths.

"Ok calm down and tell me what happened," Haley said forcefully, gripping Brooke's shoulders.

Brooke looked at Haley and saw the fear in her eyes. "He called me and then when we were talking I heard a series of shots and the line went dead," Brooke told her as Haley felt herself start falling apart. _I have to be strong for Peyton, _Haley reminded herself.

"Okay Brooke, Peyton's been through so much tonight this will just push her over the edge. Why don't you come back tomorrow and we'll tell her then okay?" Haley asked trying to stay calm.

"What happened Haley?" Brooke asked worried.

"Don't worry Brooke," Haley said waving a hand dismissively and closing the door behind her.

"No Peyton's one of my best friends now tell me what the hell happened," Brooke demanded.

"It's Peyton's choice if she wants to tell you, but I'm not going to break her trust when I just found out about it tonight and it happened 3 years ago," Haley said standing her ground.

Brooke glared at Haley before turning around and stomping to her car. _I can't believe her! Peyton's one of my best friends and now we need each other more than other because of Derek and god please let him be okay, _she thought before ranting about Haley in her head again.

Haley ran her fingers through her hair pulling slightly at her locks before getting into her car and driving to her house.

Sneaking in she went straight to the couch and climbed on Nathan, hugging him closer as her walls broke and the tears finally fell again. Nathan felt her climb on him and when he felt her tears on his skin, he squeezed her closer to him knowing she didn't want to talk, but just be held. They fell asleep that way a silent understanding between the two. He knew if she wanted him to know she would tell him in the morning.

--

Haley woke up to the smell of waffles floating in the air. Sitting up she rubbed the sleep from her eyes before making her way into the kitchen and seeing Nathan dressed in the clothes he wore the previous day. She smiled as she saw him standing over the toaster and making her breakfast.

"Morning," She told him walking up and wrapping her arms against his torso.

Turning around he quickly bent to give her a quick kiss, which he soon deepened. "Morning beautiful," He said when the waffles popped up. Placing them on a plate he handed it to her before going to get her a glass of milk.

"Aren't you going to eat with me?" Haley asked confused when he didn't put more in for himself.

"I already ate and now I have to go home and shower before meeting Lucas." He told her handing her the milk. "I'll see you later," He added kissing her goodbye and leaving.

Haley was confused as he left the house. She didn't know what was going on with Nathan today. She finished her breakfast and went up to shower and change before going over to Peyton's. Slipping on a comfortable pair of jeans and a t-shirt she made her way downstairs and threw on her flip-flops, before walking out the door. Making sure the door was locked she noticed a piece of paper taped to it.

Smiling she figured it was from Nathan and ripped it off the door and got into the car before tearing open the letter. Noticing it was typed on a computer she silently read it. She gasped in surprise, her hands shaking and body trembling as she reread it except this time out loud to herself.

"**Josh's death was not an accident and you better break up with Nathan before he dies next because of you."**

The tears sprang to her eyes, before she threw the paper on the passenger seat and made her way to Peyton's.

As soon as she got to Peyton's, Haley threw the letter in her purse to show the blonde, before walking up the door and using her key let herself into the house. As she crossed the threshold she looked to see if Peyton was up.

"Peyt?" She yelled into the house. Not getting a reply back she walked to the curly blonde's bedroom and found her exactly the way she had left her, except this time clutching a pillow that had mascara stains on it. Gently shaking Peyton, she finally stirred seeing Haley in her room and sat up.

"Hi," Haley whispered as Peyton looked at her nervously. She knew Haley was being nice last night because she was breaking down and they needed to talk about her keeping the huge secret from Haley but she was scared.

"Hey," Peyton replied softly.

"Let's get some coffee come on," Haley said pulling the blankets off Peyton's body and taking her hand and leading her to the kitchen.

Haley mechanically made the coffee as the corkscrew blonde sat on the barstool off in her own world. She had to get her to open up before Brooke got there and wanted to tell Peyton about Derek. She was already having trouble trying to get her alright with the issues she was dealing with from the past, how was she meant to get her ready for news like that about her brother?

As soon as Haley started pouring the coffee into two mugs the doorbell rang startling the brunette. Peyton looked at Haley curiously before getting up and walking to the door, taking her coffee with her. _Brooke can't be here yet! We haven't even dealt with last night's issues, now we have to deal with something happening to her brother. I hate growing up we didn't have these many issues when we were kids,_ Haley thought freaking out and followed Peyton to the door. Peyton opened the door and saw two men in the marine military uniform before reaching and grasping Haley's hand in hers.

"Miss. Sawyer?" The taller man with a beard asked looking between the two women.

"That's me," Peyton said her voice hoarse and fearful.

"There's been an accident involving Derek Summers."

The doorstep fell in silence as Peyton dropped her mug of coffee.


	14. We Are Broken

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone I want to thank you all for the reviews in the last chapter. Sorry you guys for taking so long but my summer class swamped me and I barely had any time. Also I wrote a small oneshot, which you should all check out called One More Day. I want to give a special thanks to Katy, Emmy, and Allie for helping me with parts of this and to everyone who reviewed. I hope you enjoy and please review.**

**Song**: We Are Brokenby Paramore

**Quote**_: _You live and learn. At any rate, you live.

-Douglas Noel Adams

* * *

_"There's been an accident involving Derek Summers."_

_The doorstep fell in silence as Peyton dropped her mug of coffee._

"Is he…is he okay?" Peyton asked her voice cracking and squeezing her eyes shut in anticipation, praying her brother was fine.

Brooke stood behind the officers, her eyes wide and her hand covering her mouth trying to choke back the sob caught in her throat. _This must be bad if they sent guys in uniforms,_ she told herself.

"Why don't you come in," Haley said her voice quivering in fear as she ushered the two men inside.

The four made their way into the living room with Brooke trailing behind. The three girls sat on the couch and Peyton motioned for the two men to take a seat on the two plush chairs left in the room. The two men stood standing and looked at each other before the taller man with a beard cleared his throat.

"Derek Summer's was at the marine base in Iraq working with locals when someone threw a bomb in there. As far as we know there are no known survivors, but we are missing 5 marines so there's a chance he is still alive, just wounded.

Brooke grasped Peyton's hand in hers as Haley did the same thing with Peyton's left hands. All three girls sat looking at the marines in disbelief. _How could they not know if her brother was missing or not?_ Peyton asked herself angrily at the marines. _They should know and tell me what the hell is going on._

--

Nathan made his way into the busy restaurant glancing around for the familiar face he hadn't seen since sophomore year of college. Finally spotting the mane of jet-black hair Nathan made his way to the corner booth.

"Hi Addie," Nathan said sitting down across from the woman in a teal sundress, her olive skin shimmering in the sunlight from the window.

"If it isn't Nathan Scott the hottest guy of the Duke Blue Devils," Addison said with a smile looking Nathan up and down. "I'm glad you came." She told him reaching across the table and running her hand along his cheek affectionately.

Nathan shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "So how are you?" He asked his voice having a slight edge. They hadn't parted good-naturally all those years ago. _I still don't know why I came _he thought remembering back to earlier when he received a text message this morning when Haley was gone to meet him at The Butterfly.

"I'm great, I'm a model for Victoria Secret and we're doing a photo shoot in Charlotte and I heard from a little birdie you coach the Raven's in Tree Hill and thought as two old friends we should meet and figure things out.

"What do you mean figure things out?" Nathan asked apprehensively.

Before she could answer a waitress came and took their orders, and left the two in a silence as Addison tried to think of the best approach to tell Nathan.

"Mommy, mommy," a little black haired girl with piercing blue eyes yelled running up to the table.

"What Emma?" Addison asked stroking the child's cheek glancing out of the corner of her eye Nathan's perplexed face. "Can I get a vanilla shake pwease?" Emma asked using a pair of puppy dog eyes she had perfected in her short life.

"Yes have Aunt Katy order it for you. Remember mommy's talking to an old friend, so you have to stay with Aunt Katy. Emma this is my friend Nathan. Nathan this is my daughter Emma." Addison said wrapping an arm around the child's shoulders.

"Hi," Emma said shyly looking down at the floor.

"Hi," Nathan replied, a swarm of butterflies in his stomach as he noticed the bright blue eyes.

As Nathan stared at the child she turned around and walked back to a table with a blonde woman, who he presumed was Lisa.

"How…How old is she?" Nathan stuttered looking nervously into Addison's green eyes that were looking down at the table.

"She's 4," Addison told him nervously playing with the straw sticking out of her glass.

Quickly doing the math in his head he realized it was a possibility that Emma was his daughter. After all she did have his blue eyes.

"Is she…is she mine?" He asked hesitantly his voice hitching in his throat as he nervously awaited her response.

--

Lucas groaned as the sunlight seeped into his close eyelids. He felt like an elephant was jumping on his head. After getting into the little spat with Skills and what had happened with Peyton after that he had gone to the bar to drink his troubles away. Turning to his left side he bumped into something. Figuring it was one of his pillows he threw his arm around it before his eyes shot open when he felt the creamy flesh of a woman lying underneath his arm and not his pillow.

Looking over the body he realized that he didn't recognize the dirty blonde wrapped in his plaid sheets and started freaking out. _Oh shit what the hell have I done? I was getting so close to Peyton letting me in and I have sex with some random woman. Maybe we didn't have sex. Maybe we were about to and she passed out or I passed out._ Lifting the sheet off his body he slammed his palm into his head when he realized he was in all his glory. The woman turned around and cuddled into his chest, her hair tickling him as he wracked his brain trying to remember the night before.

The dirty blonde woke up when she rolled over and looked into Lucas Scott's blue eyes gazing down at her.

"Hi handsome," She purred leaning up and pecking him on the lips.

"Hi," Lucas said hesitantly trying to remember the young woman's name and how to approach the subject.

"What…what happened last night?" Lucas asked uneasily hoping she wasn't at drunk as he had been.

"You don't remember?" Lindsey asked the hurt she felt seeping into her voice.

"Uh not really," Lucas told her honestly.

"Well I was out with my friend Megan and we were at Tric and I saw you sitting at the bar." Lindsey told him as the memories fuzzily made their way back to Lucas and he groaned as he saw flashes of everything that had happened.

_Flashback_

_Lucas was sitting at the bar brooding as he thought about last night and the costume party. Taking a gulp of the clear substance he winced as he felt it fall down his throat. Throwing his hand in the air he silently signaled the bartender to refill his shot glass before swallowing that one down quickly. _

_He had been sitting there for a couple hours when another body came and pulled out the barstool next to him._

"_Hi," a dirty haired blonde said looking at Lucas before waving the bartender and ordering a jack and coke._

_Lucas nodded in response before playing idly with the shot glass in front of him._

"_I'm Lindsey," Lindsey said giving the brooding boy in front of her a smile._

"_Lucas," Lucas mumbled trying to ease the heartbreak he felt by taking another shot._

"_Is everything okay?" Lindsey asked the troubled man next to her in concern._

_Lucas contemplated the idea of telling her, before looking at the blonde in front of him and seeing she genuinely was worried. "Woman trouble" He finally spoke breaking the silence._

"_What happened?" Lindsey asked curiously._

"_Well I went to this party," Lucas started, leaving out that it was last night everything happened, "and this girl I like was by the bathroom and I kissed her and well long story short I asked her if we could be together yet and that I wasn't going to leave her or hurt her and she just ran away. I'm so sick of chasing after her!" Lucas growled frustrated. _

"_I'm sorry. You seem like a great guy and if she can't see that then maybe...I dunno," Lindsey said shrugging her shoulders and trying to think of what other advice she could give him._

"_Lets have fun," Lucas told her before waving the bartender and ordering the two a shot of Tequila. _

"_To new friends," Lindsey said raising her shot glass into the air and letting it clink with Lucas'._

_The duo sat and drank until the bartender came and told them the club was closing. Lucas wobbly got to his feet as Lindsey dizzily got to hers too, both drunk from all the alcohol that had been consuming._

"_Come ehverrrr" Lucas said drunkenly as he tried to touch her cheek, b__ut missed her face by inches._

"_Otay," Lindsey said as the two waited for the cab the bartender had called for them._

End Flashback

"I'm not usually like this…god I really hope you don't think I'm a slut now," Lindsey told him blushing when she realized she basically had a one night stand with a man she barely knew. This hadn't happened since college, she was just supposed to be out celebrating with her friend about getting a new job.

"I don't think you're a slut," Lucas told her. "Do you want to get some breakfast?" He asked trying to make Lindsey feel better.

"Sure," Lindsey said grabbing the sheet and holding it close to her body before grabbing her clothes and walking to the bathroom.

After he heard the door shut Lucas rubbed his hands up and down his face as he thought about how he made his life into a bigger mess than it already was.

--

Needing to get away from the scrutinizing eyes of Haley and Brooke, Peyton told the two she needed to check her cell phone.

Running upstairs Peyton glared at her phone, knowing the voice mail she still had saved from two days ago. _I'm such a masochist,_ She told herself picking it she closed her bedroom door and sat on her bed. Her trembling fingers dialed the voice mail and when prompted punched in her password. Holding the phone to her ear shakily she re-listened to the message, Skills voice filling her ear.

"Its funny how wrong you can be about a person. I mean they give you this ray of hope and you do the best you can to make sure they know that they mean everything and then they turn around and kiss your best friend...oh wait, didn't you do that? I never thought I would have my heart ripped out and stomped on by my childhood crush...guess you never know what kinda person someone is until you see them making out with your supposed friend while waiting for the bathroom or by the bathroom when your only there to be supportive...giving her time, people always leave right? Congrats...so am I," Skills bitter voice spoke out as the tears welled up in Peyton's eyes.

Numbly closing the phone Peyton got up and paced to the bathroom. Everything was building up and she couldn't take it anymore. She wanted to desperately just punch the mirror and let the pain leave her, but she knew if she did that then Haley and Brooke would be up there.

Slamming her hands against the sink she let the tears take over. Everything was so messed up. She gripped the sink as she fought back the tears. Shaking her head she ripped off her sweatpants and tank top and turned the handle on the shower until it was scolding hot, hoping that would ease some of the pain coming from her heart. She just lost one of her best friends because of a miscommunication.

Stepping into the shower she felt the hot water licking her skin. She felt numb though. In 48 hours she had to tell her ex boyfriend about her miscarriage, relive Anna and Larry's death, find out her brother's dead with a small possibility that he could just be wounded and lost a childhood friend. Crumpling onto the showers floor, she brought her knees to her chest and cried gut wrenching sobs, the water muffling her cries.

--

Skills was playing NBA live in his living room when he heard the knock on his door. Standing up he walked to the door and opened it before slamming it shut in the person's face.

"What the hell?" Lucas yelled through the door hoping Skills would hear him.

"I don't want to talk to your pansy ass," Skills called back.

"Skills open the door," Lucas ordered.

Wrenching the door open Skills glared at Lucas. "Whatever Peyton wanted you to tell me, mind your own business. I didn't think you had it in you dog to be such a…. you know what forget it. This friendship is over." Skills added before slamming the door again.

Lucas stood bewildered at the closed door in front of him before shaking his head and walking away to talk to Peyton. He didn't know what the hell was going on.

Skills sat back on the couch and unpaused the game before resuming where he was. _I can't believe the nerve of her sending Lucas here just because of the voicemail I left her_. _Who would've thought that skinny punk had it in it to come and actually talk to me, _Skills thought as he tried to clear his mind and concentrate on the game.

--

Lucas walked to Peyton's door a little nervous of the scene that had just played and hoping it wouldn't repeat at this door. Knocking on the door he waited for a flash of curly blonde hair to open the door.

--

Haley and Brooke had stayed and were waiting for Peyton to get out of the shower. Brooke had confided that she didn't want to be alone and both girls were worried about Peyton. The two girls had been sitting at the kitchen drinking hot chocolate in silence when a knock on the door interrupted them.

Looking at Brooke, Haley stood up and walked to the door. The surprise evident on her face when she saw Lucas standing there. "Hey Lucas," She said warmly ushering him into the house before closing the door behind her.

"I thought you and Nathan were hanging out today?" Haley asked perplexed leading the male blonde into the kitchen.

"Uh no I don't think so," Lucas answered scrunching up his face in deep concentration.

"He told me he had to go home and shower before you two were getting together," Haley said confused. _Why would Nathan lie to me?_ She thought.

"Oh," Lucas said his eyes widening in faux recollection. "Yea we are, crap what time is it? We're suppose to meet at like 4," Lucas said pretending like he forgot he was going to meet his brother.

"Oh ok well it's like 3:45 now, so you better hurry up so your not late," Brooke said glancing at the clock.

"Yea I'll just talk to Peyton later," Lucas said smiling before walking out the door. _Why's Nathan lying to Haley?_ Lucas asked himself as he left. Grabbing his cell phone he flipped to Nathan's name and pressed call. Letting it ring he sighed in frustration when the voice mail picked up. "Hey man where are you? We need to talk. Call me back" Lucas said before hanging up and making his way to Nathan's house.

--

Haley grabbed her purse and walked into the bathroom needing to escape the silence in the kitchen. Her mind still on the letter in her purse. She felt the gnawing in her stomach as she reread the piece of paper. She was going to show it to Peyton, but how could she put even more added stress to the blonde. _What does this mean that Josh's death wasn't an accident? What the hell has my life turned to?_ She thought as the little white piece of paper slid out of her hands and to the ground before balling herself up on the floor and letting the tears fall.

--

Lucas was standing in front of Nathan's door waiting for him. Nathan didn't see his brother and got out of his car and went to the red escalade that pulled in the driveway behind him, before opening the back door and reaching in to grab the little brunette that was buckled in a booster seat.

Addison followed behind Nathan with a backpack slung over a shoulder. The two talking about Emma and what kind of things she liked.

"Nathan, what are you doing with Addison?" Lucas questioned looking between the two bewildered.

"Mommy," the little girl spoke reaching out for her mom after seeing the strange blonde man.

Looking between his brother and his brothers ex, a look of fear passed on Lucas' face seeing the little girl resembling his Nathan.

"Nathan is she yours?" Lucas asked looking his brother in the eye.


	15. It Ends Tonight

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone I want to thank you all for the reviews in the last chapter and I hope this chapter makes up for not updating for so long. I just got busy reading for class and then I started reading the Twilight series, which is amazing and I recommend it for everyone to read and then I got writers block. I want to thank Allie for editing this chapter and for Hayley helping me find a song. Also thanks to Katy and Emma. If you guys want a good naley story read "****Slow Dancing In A Burning Summer." Okay enough rambling enjoy and please review. If I get enough reviews I will try to update Monday afternoon.**

**Song**: It Ends Tonight by All American Rejects

**Quote:** In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life. It goes on.

--Robert Frost

* * *

"Hey Hales," Lucas said opening the door just as Haley had her fist ready to knock.

"We really need to stop meeting like this," Haley joked referring to when he came to Peyton's.

"Hey! It's not my fault you're stalking me," Lucas joked, not noticing the slight wince Haley made at the words.

"Is Nathan home?" Haley asked plastering on a fake smile.

"Yea, come on in I was just leaving. I think he's in the kitchen." Lucas told her before walking down the driveway and into his car. He couldn't believe how fast it seemed his life was going. _Should I tell Peyton about Lindsey or would she even care?_ Lucas asked himself starting up his car and driving back to the café and meeting Lindsey for coffee. His thoughts drifted back to the Halloween party and why he was even at the bar a couple days ago.

_Flashback Halloween party at Tric_

_Peyton was standing in the back waiting for the bathroom. She was trying to avoid Lucas and Skills. _

"_Hey." Lucas said coming up beside Peyton, taking the Superman wig off and running his fingers through his short blonde hair._

"_Hi." Peyton replied nervously glancing around them and seeing nobody. __**I really don't want them to be fighting**__ she thought._

"_So, I know you don't want a boyfriend, but what if we just hung out on our own. Just the two of us and watch a movie or something?" Lucas asked, praying in his head that she would say yes._

"_Mhmm hmm" Peyton said zoning out on the red emblem stretched across his chest and the blue spandex showing off his muscles. She crossed her arms and looked away. __**I do not need to be having thoughts of ripping it off him. I do not need that drama now especially when Skills made it clear he has feelings for me and I don't know what to do**__, she told herself trying to focus back on what Lucas was saying. "Wait, what?" She asked shaking her head to rid her head of the loose thoughts._

"_I was asking if you wanted to hang out. Just the two of us," Lucas said trying to keep his voice even._

"_Sure." Peyton said before giving him a small smile. The two stood their in awkward silence, Lucas trying to decide whether he should just take the plunge and kiss her senseless or walk away. A nervous chuckle escaped Peyton's black lips as she felt Lucas undressing her with his eyes._

_Squinting his eyes Lucas looked around before closing the distance between them and gripping her slender arms and seizing her lips with his. Breaking the kiss Lucas peered at her waiting for a slap or an obscene word, instead Peyton threw her arms around Lucas and fused their lips together again. Lucas ran his tongue along the seam of her lips as she granted permission and their two tongues dueled together in passion and lust. Peyton barely flinched when her back hit the wall behind her as Lucas' hands roamed her body. Peyton's head was fuzzy with all the emotions Luke was bringing out and his tongue curled around hers, neither seeing a man in a Spiderman costume watching them and clutching his fists before shaking his head and walking off._

"_Oh sorry," Brooke said walking out of the bathroom and seeing the two blondes. Holding her chuckle in as she watched the two blondes spring apart, Peyton's cheek flush a deep crimson. Brooke winked at Peyton before sashaying her hips in amusement at all the crap she could give Peyton for what she just witnessed._

"_Oh god," Peyton said putting her hand on her head and shaking her head at the ground. "I…we cant do this Luke, I'm sorry…this never should have happened," Peyton told him before running out the back doors and leaving a stunned Lucas staring after her._

_End Flashback_

Lucas knew it was bad that he was going to meet Lindsey, but he liked her company and she was less complicated than Peyton. _Maybe I'll ask her out_, he thought parking his car in front of the café and making his way inside.

_--_

Peyton had invited Brooke to come over and watch reruns of Friends on TV, since she knew the brunette was distraught over the news of her brother and Peyton really didn't want to be alone after the military guys came a couple days ago.

_I really hope he's okay_ Brooke thought thinking about Derek. She hadn't been able to sleep or just do almost anything but think of Derek, just remembering the last time she talked to him and how her breath caught in her throat when the dial tone boomed through the phone.

Peyton kept staring at the TV trying to keep her mind blank as she watched Friends. Everything seemed to be going wrong. She pushed Lucas away, it seemed that Haley was avoiding her, Skills was pissed, her brother could be dead or alive and her life seemed chaotic, but the bad mess. She needed to start fixing the mess she had created with Lucas and Skills.

_**Joey was sitting by the window when he looked up and saw the naked guy across the street had a friend. "Hey hey check it out, check it out ugly naked guys got a naked friend!" Joey said in amazement as the other ran to the window.**_

_**Chandler, Monica, Phoebe and Rachel rushed to the window and peered into the apartment building across the street.**_

"_**Oh yea" Rachel said surprised looking out the window before realizing who it was and shrieked. "Ugh Oh my god that's our friend! It's naked Ross!"**_

Peyton and Brooke laughed at the 4 friends faces.

"I love this episode," Brooke told Peyton as Peyton nodded her head in agreement before reaching into a large bowl and grabbing some popcorn.

**We're sorry to interrupt your original program for Late breaking news. The 5 missing men from the bombing on an Iraqi marine base have been found and rescued. Only 2 out of the 5 we're deceased on arrival and those families are being notified, while the remaining three are wounded. **

Peyton and Brooke both looked at each other shocked faces mirroring the others, wondering and praying that Derek was only injured and not dead. Friends came back on, but neither of them noticed it. They were too frightened to, as they glanced at the door waiting for the men in suits to tell them whether Derek would be in their future. As the phone went off both eyes locked on each other's as Peyton slowly got up from the couch and apprehensively went to answer the phone.

"H…Hello?" Peyton asked shakily her hand gripping the receiver in anticipation.

--

"Nathan?" Haley asked walking into the house and looking around for him, before making her way into the large kitchen, the sight of Nathan stopping her in her tracks as she put her hand over her mouth trying to stifle her laughter.

_I'm a Love Man  
Call me the Love Man_

His foot tapping as his head bobbed right to center as if he were waiting for a specific moment to come to him and then it happened.

_Oooh, baby I'm the Love Man  
That's what they call me I'm a Love Man  
Six feet one weigh two hundred and ten  
A Long hair... Real fair skin  
A long legs and I'm-a out-a sight  
There ain't no doubt I'm gonna take you out,  
'Cause I'm a love man_

His head was not the only thing out of control now, as it rotated in circles. The pan in his hand as he sautéed his onions danced along with the rest of his body. His hips moved from side-to-side as his legs sprung him as he bobbed up and down.

Haley stood their flabbergasted before zoning in how he was wiggling his ass and bit her lip to try and stop her from going over there and having him take her on the kitchen counter. The off-key singing made her ears hurt a little, but her heart swelled. She really loved the man making a fool out of himself dancing and she didn't want anything to happen to him.

_Ooh baby I'm a love man  
That's what they call me I'm a Love Man  
Say there goes a love man  
Six feet one weigh two hundred and ten  
Long hair..._

Nathan sang as his free hand went to his head and ran his fingers through his raven locks. His feet moved swaying left to right as if he were trying to salsa as he made his way over to the refrigerator pulling out a carton of milk before moving his way back to the stove.

_Real fair skin  
I'm long legged and I'm-a out-a sight  
My, my babe I'm gonna take you out  
'Cause I' a love man  
Ooh baby I'm a love man  
Take your hand; let me holler one time...AAWW!_

Nathan played, what she could only assume was a saxophone. His long fingers covering the imaginary holes and bending down and moving the invisible instrument in a circle before swinging it into the air, his head bopping around in tune with the music.

_Love man that's all I am now  
I'm just a love man  
Ooh baby call me a love man  
Yes I am, I'm just a love man  
Let me tell you somethin'  
Which one of you girls want me to hold you?_

Nathan asked pointing to the fridge, microwave and toaster before going back to slicing a tomato as a sauce simmered next to him.

_A Which one of you girls want me to kiss you?  
Which one of your girls wants me to take you out?  
Go on I got you, gonna knock you all night_

Nathan sang moving his knees and barely bending them as his hips rotated, trying to replicate Elvis Presley's signature move, but Nathan failed to execute the move as well as the king of rock and roll had been able to do in his time.

_'Cause baby I'm a love man  
All right, Ooh, baby I'm a love man  
Let me tell ya!  
I'm sayin' I'm just a love man, good ol' man  
I'm just a love man, fancy man_  
_I'm just a love man, good ol' man  
I'm just a..._

Nathan put his hand close to his ear and began twirling it and Haley recognized the move from the movie Hitch when Albert was showing Hitch how he danced and called it the Q-tip. Haley's lips were so tightly pursed she thought she would stop breathing. When Nathan finished by throwing the "Q-tip" away, he crossed his left ankle over his right with his hands in the air and he dipped his shoulder before in turning circling and pushing the air away from him facing the stove once again. Slowly turning around, the color drained away from his face as his eyes connected with hers.

"How you doin' hot stuff?" Haley asked deeply seductive, batting her eyelashes while trying to keep a straight face, but failing miserable as the bubble of laughter that had been building up as she had watched him dance exploded.

"Oh my god! I can't believe you were doing that." She laughed, trying to even her breathing before another round of laughter caught up with her as she remembered all the steps he'd tried dancing to and she felt her legs give out as she fell on the floor laughing so hard tears were coursing down her cheeks and she gripped her stomach as Nathan stood there in embarrassment his cheeks a slight twinge of pink as he shuffled on his feet.

Crossing his arms across his chest he waited for Haley to catch her breath. "Let's watch a movie you can choose," Nathan told her walking back to the stove and taking the pan and putting the rest of the ingredients in his stir fry, his back to Haley as her laughter's continuously filled the large kitchen.

--

"H…Hello?" Peyton asked shakily her hand gripping the receiver in anticipation.

"Hello, this is Officer Uley may I please speak to Miss Sawyer?" A deep voice boomed out of the headset.

"This is her," Peyton told the man politely as she changed the phone to speakerphone so Brooke could also hear the man.

"I have news regarding Derek Summers," Officer Uley told her.

"Is he okay?" Peyton questioned reaching out and grabbing Brooke's hand for moral support.

"Derek Summers was a prisoner of war, but we found him. He has sustained multiple bruises, a fractured wrist and a concussion. He is in an Army hospital and will be located back to North Carolina in a week." Officer Uley read off a piece of paper as Brooke and Peyton both let out a sigh of relief before smiling at each other, tears of happiness running down their faces.

"Thank you so much!" Peyton said her voice soft as she absorbed the news and let it sink in. "How can I reach him when he gets back to the States?" Peyton questioned.

"I will have an officer call you," Uley told her before quickly saying a good-bye and hanging up.

"He's okay!" Brooke cried excitedly jumping up and down.

"I know!" Peyton agreed a huge smile on her face as the tension in her shoulders lightened.

"Let's go out and celebrate," Brooke suggested as Peyton nodded.

"Yea let's." Peyton said grinning. "Why don't you go home and get ready and then come back and pick me up? I just have to run over somewhere." Peyton said hoping Brooke wouldn't question her where.

"Okay, but don't make me have to redress you!" Brooke called before skipping out the door to get ready.

Peyton walked into the kitchen contemplating whether she should go and see Skills or not. She couldn't believe that he saw her and Lucas…_I can't believe I kissed him back. I'm such a tease. Oh God, what was I thinking that night?_ She asked herself grabbing a glass of water before leaning up against the counter in deep thought. _I really need to salvage this friendship_ she thought before putting the water on the counter and making her way to her black comet.

--

Taking a deep breath Peyton got out of the car and made it the house that Skills shared with a few of his college friends and one of them was another teacher at Tree Hill High. She didn't really know the guys except Mr. McFadden who had helped her with her computer when she had a problem trying to get connected to the Internet. The other two she heard their names were Junk and Fergie. Knocking on the door, she silently prayed that Skills wouldn't slam the door in her face.

Skills opened the door and saw the mop of curly blonde hair. Debating whether or not to slam the door he leaned against it a look of annoyance on his face.

"What do you want?" Skills hard voice cut through the thick air.

"I…I…" Peyton stuttered taken aback at the glare in his eyes fixed pointedly on her.

"What? You want to tell me you and Luke are together?" Skills asked raising an eyebrow. "Congratulations" He told her sarcastically, before moving to shut the door on her.

"Skills," Peyton said using her arm to stop the door from closing. "Please. Can we just talk?" Peyton begged.

"Like I told you on the phone our friendship is over I don't ever want to see you again. I wish I had never met you that day in the park. Next time you see me don't talk to me," Skills told her slamming the door as Peyton's eyes filled with tears before walking away. She stubbornly refused to cry anymore. All it seemed like she had been doing lately was crying and she was sick of it.

--

Brooke got out of her car and was running into her house when a deep laugh stopped her in her tracks. Turning to her left she saw Owen watching her as he was putting together, what appeared to be, a picnic table. He wasn't wearing a shirt as sweat beads formed around his hairline making Brooke bite back a moan. She hadn't had sex since Derek was in town, and brooking herself just wasn't cutting it. She couldn't wait to see Derek again and be able to be with him again. Shaking her head she glared at him. "What are you laughing at?" She asked with attitude.

"You trying to run in heels," Owen said with a smirk on his face, before she turned on her heel and walked away tossing her hair over her shoulder and letting out an "oomph" before slamming her front door shut.

--

Haley and Nathan were watching Hitch while eating the stir-fry that Nathan had been cooking earlier and a bottle of wine on the table. "I so can't believe you were trying to dance earlier." Haley laughed as Nathan locked his jaw.

_I can't believe she caught me! I am so going to kill Lucas later for letting her in without warning me. Maybe I can show some really embarrassing pictures to Peyton_" Nathan thought devilishly, a smirk crept onto his face.

After finishing her stir-fry Haley pulled her feet onto the couch and curled into Nathan's side. Their empty plates sitting on the table in front of them, since both were just content watching the movie. Nathan wrapped an arm around Haley and pulled her further into his body. Feeling her cold shoulder, he pulled the fleece blanket with basketballs that Brooke had made him off the back of the couch and onto Haley. Haley snuggled closer into him and inhaled his intoxicated scent, smiling to herself as she felt her eyelids close gently.

"So, what's for dessert?" Haley asked a few minutes later.

"Well I cooked, so you have to find something for dessert," Nathan told her to content to move at that second.

"But I don't know what you have and I'm comfy," Haley pouted looking up at him with her puppy dog eyes.

Not glancing at her Nathan just shrugged. "Then I guess no dessert," he replied. "But you know I was a good boy and let you laugh at me so I think I deserve dessert." He told her bending his head down and placing a chaste kiss on her bare shoulder.

"Oh, really?" Haley asked sitting up and looking at him expectantly.

"Yep." He smirked kissing her other shoulder and moving the thin strap down her shoulder.

"And I'm your dessert?" Haley asked look at him with a coy gleam in her eye.

A hazel-eyed man walked to the window and stared at the happy couple on the couch. He had followed Haley to this house earlier and had to leave until it was dark enough he wouldn't be seen. _She's supposed to be mine_ he whispered harshly.

"Well, you don't want to get up and you do taste very good," Nathan told her crashing his lips to hers and pulling away before the kiss got too heated. "Yea, you could do for desert," Nathan said smirking at her before Haley pounced on him and connected their lips again.

Nathan maneuvered so Haley was lying underneath him. His fingers trailing up her body under her shirt. Haley thrusted her hips up wanting to feel him inside her, being with Nathan she felt everything else fade away. Nathan moved his lips from her mouth to her toned stomach, kissing his way up before he gently lifted her back off the couch and unclasped the white strapless bra before throwing it on the floor haphazardly and taking her left breast into his mouth. Letting his tongue swirl around the pert bud as Haley moaned and moved her hand that was grasping his arm to cup him through his jeans before wrapping her legs around his waist. Her hands flew to his shirt as she tried pulling it off, but getting stuck as Nathan sucked on her nipple.

The hazel man outside the window watched as he felt his pants constrict as he saw Haley's pert breasts being taken care of another man's mouth he felt his anger boil. Slipping a hand down his pants the hazel man ran his hand up and down his hard length staring at Haley's face as he imagined it was her hand doing the work.

Tearing his mouth away from her breast, Nathan let her take his shirt off before he pushed the bunched up tank top off Haley's stomach and going to work on her other breast. Giving it just as much attention as he had the other one. Haley lessened the hold she had on Nathan's waist and fumbled with the button and zipper of his jeans before using her heels and pushing his jeans and boxers down to his ankles. The only clothing stopping them was her jeans and underwear. Nathan felt her impatience and kissed his way down her body stopping when he got to the button of her jeans and hurriedly pushing them down wanting to join them. Sitting up and grabbing a condom he had put in the end table for when Haley came over to "watch movies."

Watching her through the window laying on the couch naked he felt himself come and wished that Haley would lap up his juices as she told him how he tasted. Seeing the dark hair guy position himself on Haley again, the hazel eyed man became infuriated as he saw the man try and take what was his away from him. He pulled his zipper up and taking the crowbar next to him he went to the black Range Rover and smashing the front windshield. "You wont take what's mine." The man said out loud before running to his car.

Nathan slid it onto his hard length he placed his erection at her center just as he was about to thrust into her he heard a smash before a car alarm that sounded like it was in his driveway went off stilling him as he watched Haley's lust filled eyes become alert with fear.

"What was that?" Haley asked nervously as she glanced out the window and heard tires squealing before she saw a flash of headlights pass the house.

"I dunno," Nathan told her as he saw her bite her lip.

"Can you go check?" Haley asked nervously.

Rolling off her he slipped on his boxers before grabbing his t-shirt and putting it on. He walked to the front door and opened it before seeing something glittery in his driveway. Haley threw on her jeans and tank top as Nathan flipped on his porch light and saw the glass on his pavement and in his car.

Slipping on his flip-flops that sat next to the door he made his way outside and to the end of the driveway trying to see if he could catch a glimpse of who had done it. Haley threw on her sparkly silver flip flops and walked over to her car noticing a little card propped up on her dashboard. Trying the door handle on the passenger side she gasped when she found it unlocked. Nathan looked left to right in the street as Haley opened the letter and scanned it her eyes widening in fear as she read the words.

**I warned you once. Next time lover boy gets it! I won't let him take what's mine. Break up with him or else he'll be next in the ground.**


	16. Thinking Over

**HJS-NS-23- so originally I was going to have this chapter go differently. I'm sorry this took so long, but I wasn't sure what direction I wanted to take and who I wanted Peyton to be with and everything. Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and I really hope you like this one. Sorry if there are any mistakes but I didn't have anyone read over it because I made you guys wait so long that I wanted to give this to you as soon as it was done. The songs I used are Lady GaGa Just Dance and Should Have Never by J. Lo and Thinking Over by Dana Glover. Please review and I hope you enjoy.**

**Song:** Thinking Over by Dana Glover

**Quote:** Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.

-Erica Jong

* * *

_Nathan looked left to right in the street as Haley opened the letter and scanned it her eyes widening in fear as she read the words._

_**I warned you once. Next time lover boy gets it! I won't let him take what's mine. Break up with him or else he'll be next in the ground.**_

"Hey are you okay?" Nathan asked concerned seeing face her cheeks ashen white, her brown doe eyes exaggerated in fear and the look of pure panic on Haley's face.

Haley stared at the letter in disbelief. _Why did these letters start coming now? I was just moving on with my life. Is that why there coming cause I'm finally over Josh and moving on? What should I do? I love Nathan, I don't want him to die, but I don't think I'm strong enough to let him go. Who's sending these? Nobody hated Josh everyone loved him. _Haley's eyes filled with tears but she refused to let them fall.

_What's wrong with Haley? Is she okay? What is she holding in her hands? Oh it's a piece of paper. Who would smash out my window? Did the person who smashed my window leave that? Is Dan back in town? Is he trying to scare Haley? Shit. What the hell is going on?_ Nathan thought his head feeling leaded down by bricks slowly reaching for the piece of paper in Haley's hands so he didn't startle her.

"What are you doing?" Haley questioned panicking.

"What's in the letter babe? Is it from the person who busted out my window?" Nathan questioned furrowing his eyebrows.

"No it's something from awhile ago…just a quote I wrote down." Haley said trying to put on a brave face and a fake smile.

Nathan could tell she was lying, but he didn't want to push her. He didn't know what was in that letter but he would read it when she was sleeping.

"Lets go in and call the police…"Nathan said glancing around the neighborhood again before slipping his hand into Haley's.

"Actually I have to get home…" Haley said looking at the ground. _I have to think of whose sending these and what I should do. Why is life so drama filled? _She questioned herself.

"Haley I don't want you driving home after something like this just happened," Nathan told her his voice heavy with worry. "Please just stay. What's more important then your safety? He questioned his piercing blue eyes waiting expectantly for a excuse.

"I have to go wash my hair," Haley told him jokingly.

"Haha," Nathan said dryly. "Seriously Hales after what just happened I really don't want you being alone." He told her seriously.

"I'll be fine Nathan." She told him making sure her voice stayed even before walking into the house and grabbing her stuff. When she came back to the front door he was standing there.

"You'll call me when you get home?" Nathan questioned still not liking the idea of Haley being alone.

"Yes dad," Haley said, cracking a smile to let him know she was joking. Haley wrapped her arms around his neck and inhaled his aftershave. "I promise I will be okay and anyways this person has something against you, not me. My car wasn't touched." Haley told him knowing this was a lie, but really needing the time to think about everything.

"Be safe," Nathan told her believing that this person was after him and not Haley._ I really hope they don't go after her,_ he thought holding her closer to him.

"Bye" Haley said popping a kiss on his lips and walking out to her car. The thoughts running rapid in her head about the mysterious letter writer and whether she should take the advice.

--

"P. Sawyer your ass better be ready to go!" Brooke yelled walking into Peyton's house.

"Yea I'll be down in a second," Peyton yelled back throwing on a pair of hoops and grabbing her purse and cell phone off her dresser.

"Well you don't look as hot as me but you'll do" Brooke told Peyton when she got to the bottom stair. Peyton was wearing an emerald green dress over a pair of black leggings paired with a leather jacket that was given to her by her birth mom.

"Well no one can ever look as good as Brooke Davis I've learned," Peyton said rolling her eyes as she saw what Brooke was wearing. A satiny purple tank top with a black belt and a black skirt accompanied with a pair of purple heels that matched her shirt.

"Let's go I think with all this worrying about Derek we need a night to just relax and have fun." Brooke said throwing an arm around Peyton's shoulders and leading the blonde out.

The duo made their way into the club as Lady GaGa's Just Dance blasted through the speakers.

_**Just dance. Gunna be okay.  
Da-doo-doo-doo  
Just dance. Spin that record babe.  
Da-doo-doo-doo  
Just dance. Gunna be okay.  
Duh-duh-duh-duh  
Dance. Dance. Dance. Ju-just dance.**_

_**Wish I could shut my playboy mouth.  
How'd I turn my shirt inside out? Inside out babe.  
Control your poison babe  
Roses with thorns they say.  
And we're all gettin' hosed tonight.  
What's go-ing out on the floor?  
I love this record baby, but I can't see straight anymore.  
Keep it cool what's the name of this club?  
I can't remember but it's alright, alright.**_

"Lets dance I love this song," Brooke told Peyton dragging her out on the dance floor.

--

Skills walked to the River Court and heard the thumping of a basketball hitting cement floor as a hooded figure ran a lay up and dunked the ball.

"Yo dude nice shot," Skills called out walking onto the court.

The figure spun around and whipped down the hood of the Stanford sweatshirt before raising an eyebrow. "What a chick can't play ball?" She questioned as Skills looked at her dumbfounded.

"Nah I just…haven't seen one that good," Skills told her.

"Yea sure," the mysterious girl replied before shooting a three pointer.

"You new?" Skills questioned intrigued by this basketball player.

"Yea I just moved here for a job. What's it matter to you?" The tall brown haired girl answered raising an eyebrow.

"Just curious. Where at?" Skills asked holding his hands out for the ball.

"Tric," the girl smirked catching the rebound.

-- Back at Tric--

The girls had been dancing for what seemed like a couple of hours when a slower song came onto the dance floor and Brooke dragged Peyton over to the bar where they ordered drinks. The two were just sitting there when Peyton started listening to the lyrics.

_**Tell me how did we  
Ever let the situation get this far  
Maybe we should just  
Try to hide the things we feel inside  
Things I know we can't deny**_

_**Should've never told you  
That I cared about you  
Didn't think that it would be, so bad  
Should've never kissed you  
Should've never held your hand**_

_Wow this song really describes my life right now. I need to quit stringing Lucas and Skills and figure out which one I want to be with. I should quit running scared. Just because I had a bad break up with Jake doesn't mean I should give up all guys. I can't believe I've been so selfish. I don't want to lose both of them._ Peyton thought.

_**Got to find a way to let these feelings go  
What did I  
Do the day I let you slip into my soul  
It was then, when I  
Realized that I would always want you in my life  
No one else can know  
Of the things that we've been saying on the telephone  
It would be so bad  
If they ever knew that me and you  
Were secretly into each other**_

_Woah this song fits Peyton. She needs to decide what guy to date. Maybe I should talk to her about it. Oooh I like that girls shoes. I can't wait to see Derek. Wait where was I? Oh yeah I wonder if Peyton is going to choose Skills or Lucas? Hmm if she chooses Skills their name coud be Skeyton. Oh that's cute! And lets see if she chooses Lucas hmm…Pucas? Nah umm ooh Leyton. I like that. Good now after she finally picks I can give them a couple name like Naley. _Brooke thought smiling, pleased with herself.

_**Should've never told you  
That I cared about you  
Didn't think that it would be, so bad  
Should've never kissed you  
Should've never held your hand**_

_**I'm so scared, trembling inside  
'Cause I'm feeling like somebody else already knows  
Oh my God, I love you both so much  
And to have to choose between the two  
Is hurting me so deep inside**_

_I hate that I am breaking these guys hearts. I love them both but who am I in love with? I really need to figure this out and fast. If I choose one over the other will their friendship end? How could I get in between those two? I never thought I would be facing this problem._ Peyton wondered as a few tears threatened to fall.

_**Should've never told you  
That I cared about you  
Didn't think that it would be, so bad  
Should've never kissed you  
Should've never held your hand**_

_**Should've never told you That I cared about you  
Never thought that it would be, so bad, hum  
Should've never kissed you  
Should've never held your hand  
I don't ever want to feel this way again**_

"Hey Brooke I'm going to go home…I have to think about some stuff. Thanks for tonight though. I had fun. I'll call you when I hear from the Marines" Peyton told the brunette standing up.

"You want to talk about what you have to think about?" Brooke questioned.

"No it's something I have to do myself." Peyton said adamantly.

"Okay. Let me know if you need me." Brooke told the blonde standing up and giving her a hug. _Well at least this song got her thinking about finally picking a guy _Brooke thought happily.

"Bye B. Davis" Peyton said walking away her head swimming with pictures of Skills and Lucas.

"Good luck P. Sawyer" Brooke whispered.

_**I've been searching for reason and I'm running out of time  
I can feel that it's the season  
Time to make up my mind**_

_**And I can't really tell ya what I'm gonna do  
There are so many thoughts in my head  
There are two roads to walk down  
And one road to choose  
So I'm thinking over the things that you've said  
I'm thinking over the things**_

--

Nathan woke up and reached over to grab the ringing phone and was about to click ignore when he saw it was Haley.

"Haley is everything okay?" Nathan asked worriedly looking at the clock and seeing it was 7:30.

"Yea I just wanted to tell you that I am going with Peyton somewhere so I can't meet you for lunch today." Haley told him biting her lip. _I hope he doesn't ask where._ She thought nervously.

"Hales its 7:30 in the morning you couldn't of called later?" Nathan whined into the phone.

"I know but Peyton's going to be here soon and then I'm going to be gone all day." Haley told him wide awake as she drank her diet coke and searched for her keys.

"Fine. Where you going?" Nathan asked waking up slightly.

"Charleston." Haley told him hoping he wouldn't ask her why.

"Okay. Promise me you'll be safe and you'll call me when you get back." Nathan said knowing he was going to be worried about her with not knowing who broke his windshield.

"I promise we'll be safe. And when we get back how about me and you meet up for ice cream somewhere." Haley asked.

"Okay sounds good. I'm going to go back to sleep but I will talk to you later. Bye baby." Nathan's sleep laced voice spoke.

"Night" Haley said chuckling as she hung up her phone.

"You ready?" Peyton asked running her fingers through her golden locks as she looked at Haley biting her lip. Her hands were shaking. She had stayed up almost all night trying to think of who would make her happy but she knew that she had to go to the cemetery and see her daughter. There she would find the answer of who to choose.

_**Thinking over, thinking over  
Thinking over the things that you've said  
I'm thinking over, thinking over, thinking over the things**_

_**Am I ready for forever  
Oh, God, show me a sign  
Cause if we're to be together  
Then it's got to be divine**_

The guilt of not having been there for 3 months was almost killing her. She needed to escape so she called Haley. She needed her best friend. Peyton wanted to introduce Haley to her goddaughter because if Anna was still alive that's who Peyton would've made her godmother. She also kept thinking about Skills and Lucas even know she didn't know who she was going to choose to be with.

_**And I can't really tell ya what I'm gonna do  
There are so many thoughts in my head  
There are two roads to walk down  
And one road to choose  
So I'm thinking over the things that you've said  
I'm thinking over the things**_

"Yep." Haley answered plastering a fake smile to hide her fears. "Lets go," She said grabbing her house keys at the two made their way to Peyton's comet, Peyton's thoughts on Skills and how he made her feel and then how Lucas made her feel. Haley kept thinking about the letters she had been receiving.

--

Brooke was walking through the fabric store looking for something to make lingerie out of. Pursuing her lips she let her finger move over a silk 4th of July fabric as a smile formed on her face and her dimples showed. _I have the perfect idea for this. Derek wont know what hit him when he gets out of the hospital _she thought elating out a small squeal.

--

Addie was pushing Emma in a swing when Nathan walked up. "I'm glad you came" Addie told him giving him a smile.

"Yea me too. I was surprised you called though. So what do you think of Tree Hill?" Nathan asked her crossing his arms and leaning on the swing set watching the two girls.

"I now know why you talked about it so much in college. I don't know. I'm thinking about quitting modeling. This really isn't the type of life my daughter should have. Traveling. I'm not being a good mother and seeing you happy and coaching even though it wasn't your first dream is making me consider maybe actually become an accountant. I mean I took all those math classes." Addie laughed as Nathan chuckled.

"Wow former model now accountant, who would ever think that could happen" Nathan said as Addie shot him a playful glare.

"Jerk" She told him before rolling her eyes and smiling, continuously pushing Emma.

"Higher mommy higher" Emma squealed.

"So did you tell Haley yet?" Addie questioned glancing at Nathan before making sure Emma wasn't going to high.

"No not yet…I just…I think I'm going to wait. I mean things are good for us right now and I don't really think she will object to me seeing you two. Haley's a great girl. I'm sure she would get along with you two great.

"I would love to meet her. I mean I want to meet the girl that Big shot Nathan Scott fell in love with." Addie told him smiling before grabbing the chains and stopping the swing.

"Hey why don't we grab some ice cream?" Nathan asked avoiding what Addie had just said.

"Yea. That sounds good. Emmy you want ice cream?" Addie asked placing the toddler on her hip.

Emmy's eyes got as wide as saucers as she nodded vigorously. "Mommy I want chocolate!!" Emmy said with an innocent smile.

"Chocolates my favorite too" Nathan told her as he moved to give her a high five.

The three made their way out of the park and to a local ice cream shop.

"Nathan?" Addie?" Brooke asked confusion showing on her face as she looked at the 3. "What the hell is going on here?" Brooke questioned.

"Brooke I want you to meet my daughter."

--

After being in the car the two finally arrived at the cemetery. "You sure about this Peyt?" Haley asked looking at her friends nervous face.

"Yea. This is something I need to do" Peyton told her reaching her hand out for the brunettes.

Haley clasped her hand with Peyton's and the two walked over to the grave marked Anna Sawyer and Larry Sawyer. Right next to it was a little stone that had the name Anna Coby Sawyer.

"Coby?" Haley questioned curiously. "It means supplanter. I was a big dork when I was pregnant so I was going through a website and looking at names and I decided to look up what Jake's meant and it's the same meaning as Coby's and I liked the way it sounded. A week later the accident happened." Peyton told her, her voice coming hoarse as she ran a finger over the small stone.

"I like it" Haley told her kneeling next to Peyton. "Hi Anna. I'm your Aunt Haley. I wish I could've met you but I guess god wanted the perfect little girl your parents created for himself." Haley said running her own hand over the smooth stone as tears pooled in her eyes.

"Can you give us a minute please?" Peyton asked brokenly looking at Haley.

_**Thinking over, thinking over  
Thinking over the things that you've said  
I'm thinking over, thinking over, thinking over the things**_

_**He wants to marry me, carry me far away  
He wants to love me for life  
He wants to be with me every morning I awake  
He wants to hold me thru the night**_

"Yeah I'm going to go see Josh okay. Remember I love you hunny." Haley said giving the blonde a hug before making her way across the way to Josh's headstone.

"Joshua Edward Jagielski. Sorry I haven't actually been to your grave but when you were in my dreams I could pretend you were still alive. So I'm moving on like you asked me too but I still miss you. I think I always will. Lately I've been getting letters though saying that your death wasn't an accident and I really wish you could give me a sign if that's true or not. If it's true why would anyone kill you? You were perfect. Please just give me a sign," Haley begged looking around and waiting for something. "I'm scared that who killed you is going to hurt Nathan and I love him and I can't let him die because of me. I think that's why you were killed because of me. Please I need you Josh." Haley cried burying her head in her hands as the tears poured from her eyes like rain in a storm. "Please don't let someone else I love die. " Haley cried.

--

"So Anna I came to visit because I miss you. I finally told your daddy about you. I'm sorry it took so long. Mom, Dad I wish you were still here. I don't know what to do. I have to guys who want to be with me. Skills, you guys knew and mom I told you about the boy from Cheer camp who I had a crush on, his name was Lucas. They both told me they wanted to be with me and I don't know what to do. I'm scared to let myself be vulnerable. I'm scared to get hurt. I need to make a choice though. I love them both.

_**Father, which way should I go?  
I cannot clearly see  
And, oh, I love him so  
But only you know if he's the one for me**_

_**Thinking over, thinking over  
Thinking over the things that you've said  
I'm thinking over, thinking over, thinking over the things**_

But what if I actually say who I'm in love with and then they realize what a mess I am? I need a sign to follow my heart. Please." Peyton pleaded looking up at the sky as a heart shaped leaf fell from a tree and blew onto the ground next to her. Tears of shock ran down her face as she smiled up. "Thanks. Mom, Dad please keep taking good care of my little girl until I can be there. I love you Anna. I love you mom and I love you dad. I'll try to come and more." Peyton said as the weight lifted from her shoulders. She finally felt free.

_**And I can't really tell ya what I'm gonna do  
There are so many thoughts in my head  
There are two roads to walk down  
And one road to choose  
So I'm thinking over the things that you've said**_

_**Oh, is this where I wanna be?**_

_**Thinking over the things that you said**_

--

"Well if it isn't little Haley James" The brown haired boy smiled as Haley whipped around in surprise.

"John?" Haley whispered in shock.

"In the flesh" John spoke as Haley fumbled to her feet and ran to give him a hug.

"Wow I haven't seen you since the funeral. How are you holding up? What have you been doing? How are your parents? Jake was just in town a few weeks ago.

"My parents handled Josh's death really bad but I think we are finally just now starting to get some normalcy back. You know Josh was the baby of the family." John told her as Haley nodded understandingly.

"So what have you been doing?" Haley question curiously.

"I have an apartment here in Charleston and I am just working and hanging out with friends. What about you?" John asked.

"I'm a teacher at Tree Hill high with Peyton and I just recently started dating this guy. He's the first one since Josh but I think it was finally time I started moving on with my life. I'll never forget Josh but I have to move on" Haley told him with a small smile.

"Yeah that's great you're moving on." John agreed.

"Hey Hales I'm ready." Peyton said walking over the two.

"Peyton?" John questioned staring at the curly blonde.

"John? Wow it's been forever since I've seen you." Peyton told him with a small smile.

"Yeah I hear your teaching. Never thought that would happen. I thought you would end up owning your own record label," He told her honestly.

"I like working with Haley," Peyton told him.

The three stood there in silence before Haley's phone started ringing signaling a text. Opening it up and reading it she smiled. _**I miss you.**_ Quickly hitting reply to Nathan's text she wrote _**miss you too**_.

"Well we better get going" Peyton spoke as Haley agreed nodding. "It was great seeing you again John. Tell your parents I send them my best." Haley told him giving him a hug as Peyton did the same and then the two walked to Peyton's comet. Peyton in the drivers seat as Haley pushed the button looking for a radio station.

--

"Brooke I want you to meet my daughter." Addie spoke pointing at the little girl in her arms.

"Whose the father?" Brooke asked bluntly eyeing Nathan. The girl looked almost like Nathan and she prayed that it wasn't his. He and Haley made the perfect couple and she didn't know how the brunette would deal with her boyfriend having a kid.

"It's my uncle Cooper's Brooke." Nathan told him as Brooke's mouth fell opened in flabbergasted.

"Wha…uh…are you sure?" Brooke asked eyeing the little girl and then Nathan.

"Yes Brooke I know who my daughter's father is" Addie snapped instantly regretting it. She didn't have any problems with the brunette in college for the most part, but asking her if she knew who her daughter's father hit a nerve. "I had a paternity test to prove it was Coopers, but he didn't want the responsibility of being a father and so I was close to Tree Hill for a modeling gig and looked up Nathan. He said he wanted to be a part in his cousins life." Addie explained as Brooke was still in shock. _Hot uncle Coop has a kid? _She asked herself.

"Brooke we're going to get ice cream if you want to come with," Nathan asked inviting her as Brooke numbly shook her head and followed them in the little shop.

--

"Wow I can't believe you wrote a book." Lindsey told Lucas standing in his room as she thumbed through the pages. "Have you ever thought of publishing it?" She questioned looking up at Lucas who was sitting in his desk chair. "Yeah I just never found anyone who said yes." He admitted.

"Well my father owns a publishing company and I could have him take a look at this" She told him earnestly.

"Really?" Lucas asked surprised.

"Yea. I mean I only read a little bit but I think you should show this to the world." She told him honestly.

"Thank you Lindsey" He told her standing up and walking to her.

"Its not a problem Lucas." She said smiling. "Well I better go. I had a great time at dinner tonight. We should do it again."

"Yeah. I'll call you." Lucas told her pulling her into a hug and kissing her cheek before moving his lips to press against hers.

--

Peyton walked up the door as butterflies flew around her stomach. She was finally going to tell this boy she loved him. She was in love with him and she wanted to be together. Taking a deep breath she raised her hand into a fist and knocked on the door.

The man she loved opened the door and Peyton spoke spilling her heart out. "Lucas, I made a mistake." She spoke reaching and pushing a few curls out of her face. "When you said you wanted to be with me, I got, I got scared and I pushed you away, but...

"Peyton..." Lucas said trying to interrupt her before Lindsey came out.

"But" She said holding up her hand to stop him. She needed to get this out while she still could. "The truth is, I want all the same things that you want, I do. And I want them with you." Peyton told him honestly with a small smile, letting him finally see her vulnerable.

"Hey Lucas do you want me to make popcorn to go with our movie?" Lindsey asked walking out into the hallway with one of Lucas sweatshirts on.

Peyton felt her heart drop as she looked at Lucas brokenly, her mouth slightly agape. "I…I gotta go" Peyton stumbled out before turning and walking out the door willing the tears not to fall.

"Peyton" Lucas called out trying to stop her as they stared into each other's eyes. Neither one of them wanting to break the contact as Lindsey stared confused at the broken girl in front of the door.

--

"Hey cousin," Allie said into her cell.

"Allie?" The female voice asked surprised as she wiped the tears away.

"Yep in the flesh. I got a job at Tric in Tree Hill so I was wondering if you wanted to meet up." Allie questioned.

"Yeah why don't we meet at the front of Tric?" The other person online said.

"Okay see you soon." Allie replied before hanging up.

_Maybe she will know what I should do._ The female whispered to herself before looking for her shoes and keys.


	17. I Try

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone sorry for such the long delay I just wanted this to be perfect...I'm still not completely in love with this chapter, but i didn't want to make you guys wait any longer. A big thanks goes out to Allie for beta'ing this and to Hayley for helping me and to Steph for encouraging me. Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter and I hope you like. The songs used are Lavinia by the Veils and I Try Macy Gray. Please review.  
**

**Song:** I Try Macy Gray

**Quote:** Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

-Kahlil Gibran

* * *

"So Brooke, you thought Emmy was mine didn't you?" Nathan asked smirking.

"Shut up," Brooke's raspy voice spoke as the four sat eating their ice cream.

"I love chocolate," Emmy said with a smile on her face as the chocolate ice cream surrounded her mouth.

"Chocolate is the best unlike strawberry" Nathan agreed looking at Addie's choice of flavor.

"Oh whatever," Addie said playfully rolling her eyes. "Just 'cause me and Brooke have better taste doesn't mean you have to get jealous Nathan.

"In your dreams right Emmy?" Nathan asked.

"Uh huh," Emmy said taking another spoonful of ice cream in her mouth.

"So Brooke what's new with your life?" Addie asked shaking her head at her daughters face before looking at the brunette across from her.

--

"Allie," the small brunette yelled as she ran to the girl in front of her, pulling her into a hug.

"Hi Hales," Allie said as she hugged her cousin back.

"I can't believe you moved here! I missed you so much. How have you been? It seems like we haven't talked forever." Haley rambled as Allie just looked on and smiled.

"I heard you got a new man from Peyt. Tell me about him." Allie said as the two walked to a bench.

"Yea, Nathan…he's umm great." Haley said somberly her head and heart conflicting with each other.

"Are you sure?" Allie asked noticing the way Haley was biting her lip. She knew something was up. When Peyton told her about the guy Haley was seeing she said there was a smile on Haley's face she had never seen before, but now Haley's lying. Allie could tell.

"Yeah... What about you? Any new guys?" Haley asked putting Allie in the spotlight.

"Maybe. I'm not sure." Allie replied vaguely thinking back to the guy she met at the River Court earlier.

"So, where are you staying?" Haley asked curiously.

"I don't know yet. Probably a hotel until I can find a place." Allie told her with a slight shrug, not really caring where she was staying just wanting to catch up with Haley and Peyton and see how their lives were going.

"Come stay with me. I have this huge house to myself." Haley said with a smile.

"Okay I'd love to. I just have to go to the hotel and grab my stuff." Allie told her smirking before standing up and pulling Haley up next to her.

"Lets go," Haley said walking to her car with Allie next to her.

"So you'll never believe what Sofia did a couple weeks ago," Allie said thinking about their younger cousin.

"What?" Haley asked intrigued. Sofia was such a cute little girl only 1 year old and still had all her older cousins wrapped around her fingers.

"I was sitting at my computer talking to my friend Steph and Sofia just leaned over my arm and bit me!" Allie said smirking as she looked at Haley.

"Aww she's a little Nessie" Haley joked bumping her shoulder against Allie's.

"Yea she better not meet a Jacob though," Allie told her sternly slightly gagging at the thought.

"I love that book series," Haley said wistfully as she remembered how her cousin got her into reading the Twilight Series.

The two got into Haley's car and drove off catching up on the other members of their family.

--

"_Peyton" Lucas called out trying to stop her as they stared into each other's eyes._

Shaking her head she turned around and left never once letting him see the tears silently streaming her face as she made her way to her car.

"When she arrived at her house she went straight to her room and pulled out a CD before pressing play and turning it up as she crawled onto her bed and let the lyrics mix with her sobs.

_**See my love is asleep on the floor  
In a pose that's familiar  
See my sun will just send you to war  
If the battle don't kill you**_

_**But I've changed in mind  
She's calling all the time**_

She closed her eyes as she let the song absorb into her. She had taken a chance and the whole thing backfired. _Who was that girl?_ She wondered. She slowly sat up and walked to her closet and grabbed a box from the top. Carefully bringing the box down she made her way back to the bed. Cautiously, knowing the contents were going to break her heart even more, she took the lid off and pulled the picture out of the box. It was of everyone when they all went to the club a few months back.

_**That I don't want to live in your side  
Though the rose is vermillion  
And I find it so hard to survive  
Witout when within you**_

_**My sweet Lavinia  
My sweet Lavinia**_

"Are you okay?" Lindsey asked worriedly as Lucas continued to stare at the front door in a trance.

Walking up behind him she softly placed a hand on his shoulder trying to comfort him. Lucas flinched at the touch and turned around to see Lindsey's eyes boring into him.

"I'm fine. Lets go watch that movie" Lucas said glancing back one more time as his heart tore a little remembering the way Peyton's face fell when she saw Lindsey walk out. _I wasn't going to wait for her forever to figure out whom she wanted_ he thought bitterly.

_**All the years buried under the floors  
And the wounds in the parlour  
Would have come up to greet us before  
If it weren't for my heart because**_

_**I've her name in mine  
And it's calling all the time**_

_**For my sweet Lavinia...**_

--

The next morning Haley was making eggs for Allie when the phone rang. Wiping her hands on her jeans she reached for the portable phone clicking it on as she brought it to her ear.

"Hello," Haley said walking to the fridge to pull out the orange juice.

"Hello this is Officer Jones, calling to inform you that a Nathan Scott has been in a serious car accident and is being brought to Tree Hill hospital…"

Haley felt her heart drop along with the orange juice as it clattered to the floor, tears burning her eyes. The orange liquid had pooled on the ceramic tile. "Thank you for calling," Haley said politely hanging up the phone and turning off the stove before running and grabbing her keys and purse almost slipping on the orange juice on the floor.

Her thoughts jumbled as she thought about Nathan lying on a hospital bed covered in blood and cuts. She felt the whole world crumple as her mind went into overload. Flashes of a phone call similar happening so many years ago except having Peyton at her house and the curly blonde driving to the hospital and holding Haley's hand before walking into the room and seeing Josh's bruised body before his heart rate flat lined and the nurses pushing the two young women out of the room. Please don't let him die she begged the tears beginning to stream her face as she ran to get her keys and phone.

As soon as she got to the hospital she threw the car in park and pulled the keys out of the ignition her heart beating frantically as she worried about Nathan.

She made it to the front desk in record speed. "Is Nathan Scott here yet?" Haley asked panting and trying to catch her breath.

"Let me check, one minute. No, there is no one here under that name. Are you sure he was brought here?" The nurse asked seeing the distressed eyes of the young woman in front of her wearing pajama bottoms and sweatshirt, her cheeks flush with worry.

"I got a call from Officer Jones saying Nathan Scott was being brought to Tree Hill Hospital could you please check again" Haley begged gripping the desk.

The nurse pressed some more keys on her computer and turned back to the woman in front of her and nodded sadly.

"I'll just wait…maybe their bringing him now" Haley said sinking into a hospital chair and closing her eyes. Crap Lucas, Haley thought digging in her purse and pulling out her cell. Quickly dialing his number, Haley impatiently waited for him to pick up. "Hey Hales what's up?" Lucas asked slightly out of breath.

"It's Nathan…there's been an accident," Haley told him wanting to just get it out of the way.

"Haley, are you okay? Nathan's fine he's right here at the River Court with me. We're shooting some hoops," Lucas told her his concerned voice coming through the phone.

"Wha…what?" Haley asked feeling the air escape her lungs as she grabbed her stuff and walked out of the hospital.

"Yeah do you want to talk to him?" Lucas asked scrunching his eyebrows together as he looked at Nathan curiously who was shooting hoops.

"No…that's okay" Haley said getting into her car and locking the door. "I'll talk to you later. Sorry Luke, bye." Haley said before hanging up. Gripping the steering wheel with both hands Haley put her head on the top of the wheel taking deep breaths and trying to calm herself down before driving home.

When she got home she walked to her door she noticed a white envelope sticking to the door. Closing her eyes she took a deep breath before reaching out and ripping the envelope off the door, walking over to a chair she sat down and opened the letter.

**Next time Nathan won't be so lucky. I warned you once, I'll warn you again break up with him or he will die.**

Her heart stopped as she read the note. I can't lose Nathan she thought her heart breaking. But I would rather see him everyday and know he's okay then him dead. I love him. I can't lose him. I have to break up with him. I have to protect him like I couldn't with Josh. Haley thought the tears falling freely from her eyes. Pulling her knees to her chest she let her head fall to rest on her knees as she grieved for the loss of Nathan. I have to break up with him today before anything happens to him.

_**Games, changes and fears  
When will they go from here  
When will they stop**_

"Haley?" Allie asked walking out and seeing the broken girl in front of her. "Are you okay?"

Haley looked up at her with bloodshot eyes and tear marks streaking her pale cheeks. Her lost brown eyes' latching on Allie's concerned ones as she shrugged her shoulders.

Allie walked up to the chair Haley was sitting on and wrapped her arms around the petite brunette silently whispering everything was going to be okay and praying that everything would be.

--

Peyton woke up with a splitting headache as she moved and heard a crunching noise behind her. Sitting up she realized she had rolled onto one of the photos of her, Lucas and Brooke from cheerleading camp. Sadly glancing down at the picture she picked up all the other memorabilia's she had of Lucas that no one knew about from the past couple months and from cheer camp and put them back in the box.

I wonder if I should burn them? Maybe I should rip them up instead. He told me he would wait for me and then he doesn't. I guess I didn't mean as much to him and he did to me, she thought sadly before walking into the bathroom and staring at her reflection in the mirror. Her green bloodshot eyes stood out to her as well as the dark circles under her eyes and the matching trails of mascara lines marking her ashen cheeks. She pulled a washcloth from a drawer before running it under hot water as she ferociously wiped away the mascara. Closing her eyes she took a deep breath before walking out and changing into a pair of jeans and sweatshirt needing to get out of the house.

Letting her feet lead the way she let her mind wander. Will you go out with me? I think we should just be friends. You don't have to be scared with me. I thought Lucas Scott would never break my heart…if only that were true. Who would even want a shattered heart now? She questioned herself. Looking up she realized she was at the River Court. This place was like the cemetery in Charlotte it helped her think. She walked to the bleachers and sat down staring onto the court and losing herself once more in the memories.

--

Lucas slipped out of bed and threw on a sweatshirt before grabbing his basketball. After the movie last night his head was conflicted with the thoughts of two different women. He made his way to the river court listening to his music as he ran. Walking onto the court the ball slipped from his grip noticing the curly blonde sitting on the bleachers.

Peyton looked up quickly hearing the ball bounce on the concrete ground her eyes wide in shock and she noticed whom the ball belonged to.

_**I believe that fate has brought us here  
And we should be together babe  
But we're not**_

"Hey Luke" Peyton said trying to push a smile on her face as she pretended what happened last night hadn't affected her.

_**I play it off but I'm dreaming of you  
And I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin**_

"Hey. What are you doing here?" Lucas asked curiously.

"Just thinking," Peyton answered honestly standing up and brushing the dirt from her jeans as she tried to make sure her voice was even. "What about you?"

"Just came to shoot some hoops. You want to play?" Lucas asked nicely.

"No, I better go." Peyton told him.

"I'll be seein' ya," he told her as she stopped in her tracks trying to get the courage to keep walking.

_**I try to say goodbye and I choke  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not there  
Goodbye and I choke**_

Looking back she saw him shooting hoops and walked away knowing that she couldn't lose his friendship or her already shattered heart would be beyond repair. Walking away she could only think of the life she could have if she would've realized before what she wanted. She would still be friends with Skills and her and Lucas would be dating.

_**I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not there**_

Lucas watched her leave with regretful eyes; he wanted to chase after her. He'd promised he wouldn't break her heart, and yet, he'd broken that promise. He liked Lindsey, he really did, but last night all he could think about were those two emerald green eyes gazing brokenly into his as Lindsey walked into the hallway.

_**I may appear to be free  
But I'm just a prisoner of your love  
And I may seem all right and smile when you leave  
But my smiles are just a front  
Just a front, hey  
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you  
And I'll keep my cool but I'm feignin'**_

Peyton kept walking wishing he would call her back and tell her Lindsey didn't mean anything to him and that he still wanted her. Stopping her walk she looked back at the River Court and noticed that Lucas was sitting at the bleachers. Her heart urged her to go back, but her stubbornness kept her walking to her house.

_**I try to say goodbye and I choke  
(Yeah)  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not there  
Goodbye and I choke  
(Yeah)  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not there**_

--

Picking up her phone Haley stood in her living room closing her eyes and contemplating what she was going to do. Should I tell him the truth or should I protect him she wondered biting her lip before dialing the familiar number. The phone rang awhile before his voicemail picked up. "Hey, it's Nathan leave me a message," his voice spoke through the cell.

"Hey Nathan it's Haley…I was just seeing if we could get together today. Meet me at the docks at…" checking the clock in the living room and seeing that it was already 2 and thinking how much time she would need to think about what to do she said "meet me there at 7 tonight. See you then. Bye." She finished quickly hanging up and exhaling the breath she didn't realize she had been holding in.

--

Nathan checked his cell and noticed he had one new voice message. Dialing his voicemail a smile sprang to his face hearing Haley's message. Frowning slightly after listening to it. Something seemed off in her voice he noticed. Looking at the time he realized he didn't have to meet her for another 3 hours and decided to play NBA live while he waited.

--

It was 6:50 when Haley arrived at the docks. She was nervous she still didn't know what she was going to do as her hands shook and her heart beat painfully trying to imagine life without Nathan. Even though they hadn't been dating very long, Haley loved him and couldn't imagine her life without him.

Nathan saw Haley standing there and smiled, his eyes sparkling when they caught hers.

"Hey baby," Nathan said kissing her passionately.

"Hi," Haley said finally making up her mind about what she was going to do when she saw Nathan standing in front of her.

"How did yesterday go?" Nathan asked curiously tucking a stray piece of hair behind Haley's ear.

"It went okay..." Haley answered trying to stay strong as she felt Nathan's hand cup her cheek and willing herself not to lean into his touch.

_**Here is my confession  
May I be your possession  
Boy I need your touch  
Your love, kisses and such  
With all my might I try  
But this I can't deny  
Deny**_

"We need to talk," Haley told him biting her lip and turning her head away from his hand.

"What's wrong? Is everything okay?" Nathan asked worriedly.

"I'm sorry Nathan I just…I can't do this anymore." Haley choked out biting her lip harder to stop the quiver from escaping her lips.

Nathan's eyebrows scrunched together, "What?"

"This...us" Haley told him waving her hand back and forth wildly before turning away from him.

He felt his heart stutter in his chest, her words like a knee to the stomach, "Wh…Haley." He breathed out, not knowing what else to say he whispered, "Why?"

_**I play it off but I'm dreaming of you  
(But I'm dreaming of you babe)  
And I'll keep my cool but I'm feenin'**_

_Because I love you too much to see you get hurt,_ she thought brokenly but instead turned around and looking into his heartbroken blue orbs and lied, "because you're suffocating me. We're always together and I just need space. I need to focus on my students. That's why I became a teacher to help people and ever since we got together that hasn't really happened. My job is the most important thing in my life right now. I just can't handle you…me…us right now, I'm sorry," Haley told him hoping he would believe her lie, her heart shattering as she looking into his broken eyes and she crossed her arms across her chest to keep him from trying to hug her.

When he was seven Nathan fell out of a tree and broke his arm, he never thought anything would hurt as much as that, but as he felt his heart breaking in his chest he knew he was wrong. The pain he felt through his upper body was excruciating.

"Good bye Nathan," Haley said softly walking towards him and kissing his cheek before walking away so he wouldn't see the unshed tears that were threatening to fall.

_**I try to say goodbye and I choke  
(Yeah)  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try  
(Try to hide it)  
To hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not there  
(When you are not there ahh)  
Goodbye and I choke  
(Yeah yeah yeah)  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
(Hey hey hey)  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
(Say it Lord)  
My world crumbles (Lord)  
When you are not there  
(The Lord kisses us)**_

He locked his jaw, and with that his whole body seemed to freeze. He couldn't understand what was happening. Why she was breaking up with him. He wanted to run, run after her and tell her to stay, that he loved her and he would do anything to get her to stay, but he didn't. He stood frozen to the ground as he watched her walk away. Feeling his world fall to pieces without her already.

_**Goodbye and I choke  
(I'm choking)  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not near  
(When you are not near yeah yeah yeah)  
Yeah yeah**_

"Well I guess she finally got smart," the man watching them said from behind the bushes as he smiled evilly. His plan was working perfectly.


	18. It's Not Over

**HJS-NS-23- Okay so you guys call all hate me I wouldn't blame you. I am SO sorry it took so long to update this chapter. But I am writing this as I go, I only know the climax, and in the past month I have been having serious issues with one of my English professors. She's been telling me that I can't write and basically asking me how I got as far as I did in the English program. I am a senior in University going for an English Major so that gave me a major roadblock. I want to give a huge Thanks to Allie for helping me pull out of my slump and to Steph for helping me find the perfect song and finding the perfect Twilight quote. Also thanks to KatKat and all your wonderful reviews. Any who I hope this makes up for not updating for so long and enjoy. Its one of my shorter chapters, but it's very intense. I hope you all enjoy and please leave me a review, whether you didn't care for it or loved it I want to know. Enjoy :o)**

**Song:** It's Not Over by Secondhand Serenade

**Quote**: Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

-Kahlil Gibran

* * *

As soon as she was far enough away she let the tears pour down her cheeks, her heart aching in her chest, and before she knew it her legs were running home not once looking back for the fear of turning around and telling Nathan everything. About the letters, and his supposed accident and let him comfort her, tell her that everything would be okay. But she couldn't risk it. What would happen to Nathan if he found out the truth about the letters? Would he risk his life just to protect her or do something stupid? She couldn't bear for something to happen to Nathan that's why she had to end their relationship no matter how much her heart was aching and the numbness taking over her body.

_**My tears run down like razorblades  
And no, I'm not the one to blame  
It's you ' or is it me?  
And all the words we never say  
Come out and now we're all ashamed  
And there's no sense in playing games  
When you've done all you can do**_

She was a few blocks away when the sky erupted above her and the rain started pouring. She barely felt the drops of rain kissing her skin and drenching her. All she could remember was the way Nathan's eyes stared brokenly into hers. Her tears mingled with the rain and when she finally arrived at her house she fell to the steps and let the sobs that she had been pushing back erupt as she mourned the lost of him and their relationship.

_**But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?  
We had the chance to make it  
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over  
I wish that I could take it back  
But it's over**_

---

Nathan stood there still in disbelief at what had just transpired between the two. He couldn't believe what had just happened. He was going to tell her he loved her tonight. He had it all planned out. They would go get hot chocolate and then walk on the docks and he was going to pull her to sit at the table where he asked her out and push back a strand of her chocolate wavy hair, that always seemed to fall onto her face, look deep into her eyes and tell her loved her. He had since the moment he met her and he always would. Before he could fathom gaining the strength to run after her a voice behind him made him stopped in his tracks. His blood running cold at the voice.

"Hello son."

---

"Hey," Brooke said softly staring at the dark skinned man in the hospital bed before glancing at the curly blonde, fast asleep with her head on the bed.

"Hi," Derek whispered back not wanting to wake his sister. He didn't know what had happened earlier, but she came in with tear tracks on her cheeks and squeezed him tightly saying he was the only guy she had left in her life. He was confused to say the least, but figured he would let it slide knowing how fragile the blonde looked and feeling drained as well. Instead he told her stories of his childhood as she rested her head on his bed and fell asleep.

"How are you feeling?" Brooke asked softly walking up to the bed and giving him a chaste kiss on the lips before running a hand softly across his bandaged forehead.

"I'm okay," Derek told her grabbing her hand and intertwining their fingers. "Better now that you're here," he told her with a small smile.

"You scared the shit out of me," Brooke rasped tears pooling at her eyes as she squeezed his hand to reassure herself he was fine.

"I'm sorry," Derek told her sincerely cupping her cheek.

"You can make it up to me later," Brooke told him choking back the sob that was rising in her throat and giving him a small smile. "Please don't go back," Brooke begged knowing that any day she could lose him with him fighting overseas.

Derek's brows knitted in confusion. _This is my job. The only life I've ever really known and appreciated, _he thought to himself. "This is my job Brooke." He told her.

"So get a new one. I can't…I can't keep worrying about whether or not your going to be safe." Brooke told him brokenly.

"Brooke, this is my job," he repeated hoping she would understand it was a part of who he was as a person.

"Find a new one a safer one. Just please don't go back," Brooke pleaded.

"No I wont. I'm sorry," Derek said his voice strong.

"Not as sorry as I am," Brooke said looking at him before turning around and walking out of the room the tears spilling from her eyes.

The door slammed shut waking Peyton from her nap as she looked around confused. "What happened?" she asked drowsily.

"Nothing," Derek snipped his features hard before softening. "Are you going to tell me what happened with you and Lucas?"

"He gave up on us." Peyton told him softly still in disbelief over the events. "I pushed him away to much and now he's found someone else. You're the only guy I have left in my life… Please be more careful," Peyton begged.

"I'll try," Derek promised knowing that was all he could really do.

"But you know you aren't getting off the hook with Brooke. What happened?" Peyton prodded.

Derek chuckled before clearing his throat. "Don't worry about it." He told her as Peyton just gave him a you better tell me what's going on face.

---

"Hello son." Dan told him as Nathan stared dumbfounded.

"What are you doing here Dan?" Nathan asked harshly.

"I came to see my son. It's been awhile since we've talked." Dan told him.

"Yea almost a year and you know its been one of the best years of my life so lets pretend this never happened and leave me the hell alone," Nathan told him harshly walking away.

"What's your hurry? Your little girlfriend seemed like she couldn't wait to get away from you." Dan called out stilling Nathan as he turned around slowly anger bubbling up inside of him along with the pain Haley had just inflicted on his heart.

In less than a second Nathan had Dan pinned by his jacket as he pushed him into the light pole. "Stay away from me, stay away from Lucas and stay the hell away from Haley," Nathan told him seething, before walking away trying to control his temper and go talk to Haley to ask her why she was running away from him.

"You'll forgive me soon enough," Dan muttered to himself before walking away.

---

Wiping the tears away from her eyes she made her way into the house and walked into her room throwing on a pair of sweatpants and a tank top before throwing her hair into a bun and walking back to the kitchen. Making her way to the freezer she felt a small smile tug on her lips as she spotted chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. Grabbing the pint and a spoon she made her way to the living room and sat down on the couch opening the pint and digging a spoonful before putting it in her mouth and savoring it. Who ever said ice cream was the best break up cure was right.

_**I lose myself in all these fights  
I lose my sense of wrong and right  
I cry, I cry  
It's shaking from the pain that's in my head  
I just wanna crawl into my bed  
And throw away the life I led  
But I won't let it die, but I won't let it die**_

She felt a little better as she pulled the black fleece blanket with music notes off the couch and tucked it around her body. Looking at the coffee table she reached over and felt her fingers grip the worn black cover with an apple on it. Opening the book from where she last read her heart clenched as she reread her favorite line.

**Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me. The thought of you, still, white, cold… to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses… it would be unendurable. You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever…**

Haley felt the tears glide down her cheeks again as she closed the book and put it back on the table. Pushing the ice cream away she let herself sob. _Nathan and I could've been Edward and Bella. Our love could have been that strong and now I'll never know. He's going to move on and forget me. I love him. I love him so much, _she thought her sobs shaking her body as lightning and thunder shook the house.

---

As soon as Nathan got to the house he walked up to the door not caring that he was soaked. He needed Haley like he needed air. He had to tell her he loved her and get her back. He knew there was more than what she told him. He ferociously knocked on the door needing to see her.

_**But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?  
We had the chance to make it  
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over  
I wish that I could take it back**_

Haley wiped her eyes before walking to the door stopping by the mirror quick to make sure whoever was at the door wouldn't know she had been crying. Allie was gone for the night visiting a friend in Charleston. Fixing the mascara under her eyes she opened the door not expecting to see Nathan standing there. His eyes bore into hers, searching for regret and finding pain. Her heart beat wildly not knowing what to say. Nathan felt his heart sore when he found pain in her eyes, knowing she was hurting like himself.

"What…. what are you doing here?" Haley whispered, nervously clutching the door and biting her lip nervously.

"I needed to see you Hales." Nathan told her, her nickname rolling off his tongue as he stepped forward, she took a step back.

"Nathan it's over you need to leave," Haley told him as strongly as she could, trying to keep her voice from quivering.

_**I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart  
Don't say this won't last forever  
You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart  
Don't tell me that we will never be together  
We could be, over and over  
We could be, forever**_

"Its not over Hales. I don't believe that you don't really want to be with me. I think you're scared and you're running away," Nathan told her his voice strong and steady trying to push out the pain he felt at her not jumping in his arms and saying she made a mistake.

"I am not running away," Haley told him knowing she couldn't say she wasn't scared. She was…she was terrified she would never see his piercing blue eyes or raven locks. She was petrified that he would end up the same way Josh did and she needed to protect him. He didn't deserve to die. Especially not for her. He deserved the best life he could and she had to keep him safe. She needed to love him from afar.

"Haley I promise I wont interfere with your job. Come on baby don't tell me it's really over," Nathan begged cupping her cheek and staring into her eyes. Haley could feel the tears fill her eyes and closed them savoring his touch and knowing she was going to have to lie to the only man she would ever really love as much as she loved him.

"You want the truth?" She asked looking up into his face before looking down and lying through her teeth. "I still love Josh. I'm not over him. Every time we kiss I picture him," She told him pushing the bile that rose in her throat down. Nathan dropped his hand from her face like it had just been burnt. He stepped back hurt shining on his face. "You're lying," He told her his voice weaker than he wanted.

"No I'm not," Haley told him playing with her pinkie ring. "I was just trying to replace you with him, and I realized I never will. It's not right to lead you on. I want you to leave now please." Haley told him gripping the edge of control so she wouldn't break down in front of him.

_**I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart  
Don't say this won't last forever  
You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart  
Don't tell me that we will never be together  
We could be, over and over  
We could be, forever**_

"I wish I'd never met you," Nathan spit out venomously storming out of the house and walked back into the pouring rain, his heart shattering more as he regretted ever getting to know her. He should've known she could never love a man like him. He walked to his house and went straight to the gym needing to take his mind over the black hole that was plaguing his heart and using the anger and pain into a workout.

---

As soon as she saw him down her driveway she closed the door before running to the bathroom and heaving into the porcelain bowl and emptying the contents of her stomach. The bitterness rising in her throat as her heart exploded into a million tiny pieces and the tears stung her skin. Her limp body pooled on the floor as she let out heart wrenching sobs, her body convulsing as she remembered the look of hope on his face before she saw his heart break in front of her.

_**It's not over, it's not over, it's never over  
Unless you let it take you  
It's not over, it's not over, it's not over  
Unless you let it break you  
It's not over**_

---

Peyton and Derek were sitting in his hospital room and he had just finished telling her about what Brooke had said. Before Peyton could offer her advice a hard knock came on the door.

"Come in," Derek told the person.

"Hey Derek, Peyton," The man said walking into the room.

"Julian?" Peyton asked feeling the air whoosh out of her lungs as the drama kept spilling into the tiny town of Tree Hill.


	19. Glycerine

**HJS-NS-23- So I could offer all the excuses in the world, finals and writer block, but all I really have to say is that I am soooo sorry it took so long and now that I am on break for Jan term I hope to be writing more. Big thanks goes out to Hayley for helping me get out of my slump and to Allie for beta'ing and giving me a list of songs to choose from for this chapter. Thank you to everyone who left a review for the last chapter. Enjoy and please review.**

**Song: ****Glycerine by Bush**

**Quote****:** Sometimes we guard people from the truth to protect them from being hurt, but by doing that we only hurt them more in the long run.

-Christina Pagliarulo

* * *

_Peyton and Derek were sitting in his hospital room and he had just finished telling her about what Brooke had said. "So get a new one. I can't…I can't keep worrying about whether or not your going to be safe." Brooke told him brokenly._

"_Brooke, this is my job," he repeated hoping she would understand it was a part of who he was as a person._

"_Find a new one a safer one. Just please don't go back" Brooke pleaded._

"_No I wont. I'm sorry," Derek said his voice strong._

"Not as sorry as I am," Brooke said looking at him before turning around and walking out of the room the tears spilling from her eyes.

_Before Peyton could offer her advice a hard knock came on the door._

"_Come in," Derek told the person._

"_Hey Derek, Peyton," The man said walking into the room._

"_Julian?" Peyton asked feeling the air rush from her lungs as the drama kept spilling into the tiny town of Tree Hill._

"Hi Peyton" Julian said a smirk on his face as he looked her up and down.

Peyton tried not to shudder before looking away and leaning down to whisper in Derek's ear. "Fix things with Brooke. You both deserve the happiness you give each other," and giving him a quick hug, she walked out of the room. Before she could reach the door Julian grabbed her arm and stopped her. "It was great seeing you again Peyton" He told her kissing her cheek as she clenched her teeth before ripping her arm out of his hand and walking out the door.

---

Brooke sat at Tric glaring at all the sickingly sweet couples around her. She didn't know why Derek couldn't understand where she was coming from.

"Penny for your thoughts?" The brunette jumped slightly in her seat at the voice, the ice in her drink clinking against the glass it was in.

"Not in the mood to deal with you," Brooke's raspy voice spoke before rolling her eyes at her neighbor standing across the bar from her.

_**Must be your skin that I'm sinkin in  
Must be for real cause now I can feel  
and I didn't mind  
it's not my kind  
not my time to wonder why  
everything's gone white  
and everything's grey  
now your here now you away**_

"Okay. So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar-" Brooke cut him off swiftly. "Did you not hear what I said? I'm. Not. In. The. Mood," she punctuated each word. "Or is that too hard for your little bartender brain to decipher?"

"When I see a beautiful girl sulking I have to at least try to make her smile." Owen explained, giving her a small grin and she felt the ice around her heart melt a little. _Here was someone she had never said a nice thing to, ever, and he was genuinely trying to make her feel better. Maybe he wasn't such a bad guy after all? _She thought and, despite herself, she felt the corners of her lips turn upwards.

"There, see." Owen grinned. "Gorgeous." He winked.

She rolled her eyes again this time a small smile gracing her face as pondered as to tell him why she was so sad. Was it wrong that she wanted her boyfriend to be in a less dangerous job? Would he think she was just a selfish little brat like Derek probably thought she was?

_**I don't want this  
remember that  
I'll never forget where your at  
don't let the days go by  
glycerine  
**_

"A young woman was pulled over for speeding. A Kansas State Trooper walked to her car window and flipped open his ticket book. The lady said, 'I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the State Troopers Ball. He replied, ' Kansas State Troopers don't have balls.' There was a moment of silence while she smiled, and he realized what he'd just said. He then closed his book, got back in his patrol car and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car." Brooke told him remembering the joke she had read in an e-mail earlier. Owen started laughing and a few seconds later Brooke joined him. Feeling all the guilt leaving her body for a few seconds.

"Nice," he told her as she looked down at the bar and used her straw to play with the ice cubes. "Do you think I'm selfish?" She asked vulnerably her voice barely a whisper as she looked up at him, her hazel eyes searching his helplessly.

"What do you mean?" Owen asked scrunching his eyes in confusion.

"Am I selfish that I think me and my boyfriend just broke up because I asked him to find a safer job?" Brooke asked this time letting a small tear cascade down her cheek.

Owen heart broke seeing the brunette in front of him crying as he gently wiped the tear away. "No," he told her honestly before walking away and talking to another person behind the bar and then coming around and standing in front of Brooke. "Come with m," he gently ordered holding his hand out for her to grasp.

"Why should I?" Brooke quipped back raising an eyebrow quizzically.

"What do you have to lose?" Owen asked before turning around and walking toward the exit. Fighting the internal battle of whether to go with him or not she quickly grabbed her purse and followed him.

_**I'm never alone  
I'm alone all the time  
are you at one  
or do you lie  
we live in a wheel  
where everyone steals  
but when we rise it's like strawberry fields  
**_

---

Trying to gain some strength she grabbed onto the sink and pulled herself up, her legs feeling like jelly as she brushed her teeth and rinsed her mouth out getting the foul taste out of her mouth. Slowly holding onto the sink she made her way into her bedroom and fell herself collapse on her bed. Grabbing her favorite childhood stuffed bear, Mr. Waffles, she clutched it to her chest as the tears continued to pour down her face until her breathing evened out and she fell asleep.

_**If I treated you bad  
you bruise my face  
couldn't love you more  
you got a beautiful taste  
don't let the days go by  
could have been easier on you**_

Allie walked in after spending the night hanging out with Skills just watching movies and eating red vines and popcorn. They had talked about their childhoods and Allie was surprised how much she really liked Skills already. She walked into her cousins' room. The first thing she noticed was Mr. Waffles. _Uh oh, it's serious,_ she thought to herself before looking at Haley's face and seeing her blotchy tear stained cheeks. Not wanting to wake Haley, Allie crawled into the bed and laid their watching her cousin sleep knowing that tomorrow morning they would have a lot to talk about.

_**I coudn't change though I wanted to  
could have been easier by three  
our old friend fear and you and me  
glycerine (repeat)  
don't let the days go by  
glycerine  
**_

---

Nathan was sitting numbly on his couch his fingers frantically hitting the keys on the small controller in his hands so that his team would win. After a few more minutes he gave up with a sigh, the controller landing on the cushion beside him with a soft thud. He couldn't even play his PS3 anymore because she was there, her face in his mind. Her smile. Her laugh. God even her smell. She'd broken him. She'd broken him, tore his heart in half and left him. She ruined him for anyone else. And if that wasn't enough she was still everywhere.

Haley James.

She was the reason for the aching in his chest and the empty beer bottles surrounding him. It hadn't even been one day without her and here he was sitting in his misery, black circles under his eyes because whenever he would closed his eyes he could see hers black with lust, her perfect pouted lips, her hands running through his raven locks and over his muscled back. His tracing the curves of her figure, the taste of her skin and the smell of her vanilla shampoo. The way her back arched and her moans of pleasure as he thrusted in and out of her.

He was jolted back to reality when a knock on the door sounded through his apartment. He sat there, his head fallen back on the couch as he stared at the little bumps and crevices in the ceiling. The knocking persisted and he finally gave up and walked to the door not wanting to deal with anyone today. He just wanted to sit in self-pity, drink beer and play NBA live.

Throwing open the door he rolled his eyes when he saw his brother standing at the door. "What the hell do you want?" Nathan asked not wanting to exchange pleasantries.

"I was going to see if you wanted to go shoot hoops with me at the river court." Lucas said looking at his brother confused. Nathan's hair was disheveled and the white t-shirt stained with beer.

"What's wrong?" Lucas asked as Nathan rolled his eyes before going and sitting back on the couch.

"Don't worry about it," Nathan told him not wanting to admit what had conspired between him and Haley.

"It's nothing." He shrugged.

Lucas stepped inside the apartment, the door closing as he took in his surroundings. "Sure doesn't look like nothing," he muttered, counting the bottles scattered around his brother.

"Don't worry about it," Nathan said harshly seeing a picture frame of him and Haley on the counter and throwing it against the wall watching the glass shatter into a million tiny pieces, Lucas' eyes widening in surprise.

"Dude what happened?" Lucas asked the last thing he knew Haley and Nathan were perfect and now his brother was throwing pictures of them together at the wall? Things just didn't add up.

"I said don't worry about it." Nathan snapped, feeling his jaw lock.

_**I needed you more  
when we wanted us less  
I could not kiss just regress  
it might just be  
clear simple and plain **_

"You look like ass and now you're fucking snapping on me for no reason. Whatever the hell you did to Haley just apologize and she will take back your sorry ass, but you need to just go tell her," Lucas yelled as Nathan stayed still like a statue. "She's the best thing that ever happened to you and if you screwed up get over your damn pride," Lucas added dropping his head and shaking it at his younger brother before walking out the door.

Nathan felt all his anger boiling up inside him as his brother's words repeated in his head _she's the best thing that has ever happened to you._ Nathan knew this, he loved Haley but obviously she didn't love him. He was just some toy to her, someone that she could lead on and then forget about, change her mind and just drop him as if nothing had happened between them. He had opened up to her and for nothing. She didn't care for him, all she did was love her precious Josh,feeling the anger course through his veins he punched the wall, not even feeling the blood drip down his knuckles. Walking to the fridge he grabbed another beer before going and sitting on the couch again and laying his head back as he stared up at the ceiling. _I hate how Lucas thinks this is entirely my fault. The ass needs to stay out of my relationships._

---

Haley stood at Nathan's apartment door, her breath ragged as she tried to take a deep breath and control her emotions. It felt like a million butterflies were swarming in her stomach. She knew he was probably beyond pissed at her and hurt, but she had to tell him how she really felt. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes she let her knuckles tap on his door before holding her breath to see if he would actually listen to her.

He felt his breath hitch in his throat. There in front of him stood his angel. "What do you want?" He asked harshly trying to gage what she wanted.

"I'm sorry," Haley said looking down and playing with her pinkie ring. "I miss you," she softly whispered looking into his eyes, hers shining back in remorse.

"Well, I don't want to be your second choice. Your replacement for him," Nathan told her bitterly as he saw her eyes start to pool with tears. _Why the fuck is she crying _he thought angrily_ she dumped me, she was still in love with her ex and now she comes here and says she's sorry and she misses me and expects me to forgive her just like that? What the hell?_

"I'll just go," Haley said defeated as she turned around and started walking out, but as soon as she reached the door she turned around, "I love you Nathan," she told him honestly, her throat tightening to hold back the sob she could feel building in her throat before her hand touched the cool metal of the door knob.

He couldn't hold back the joy at her saying those words to him. She loved him. Taking a few steps he reached her and covered his hand with hers. Her shocked brown eyes flew to his in surprise and before she could question him his lips were on hers. Fast and hurried he ran his tongue along the seam of her lips and she granted him access their tongues battling for dominance as their hands wandered over each other's bodies. She could feel his defined muscles under his white t-shirt as she raked her nails through his hair, scratching at his scalp. His skilled mouth found its way to her collarbone and she moaned, feeling her legs become weak. He felt her slipping to the ground and he cupped her ass and pulled her up so she could wrap her legs around his waist. He guided them to the couch and lowered her so she was trapped underneath him, his arms blocking her in as he stared down at her beauty.

Her lips swollen from his kisses and her cheeks a rosy color, her chocolate brown eyes swirling with desire stared back at him as his fingers itched to touch the expose skin between her shirt and jeans. He softly trailed his fingers there as Haley squirmed underneath him. "Nathan that tickles," she told him, still writhing underneath him.

He couldn't help the smirk that came onto his face as he moved his to her sides and started tickling her. She shook with laughter as she begged for him to stop. Figuring she would try and get her own payback she tried to push him off her but before she knew it they were both falling off the couch. She felt the ground beneath her and looked over to yell at Nathan when she felt her heart sink. It was just a dream.

"Are you ok?" Allie asked concerned looking down at her cousin sprawled on the floor.

"Yea," Haley told her. _At least as okay as I will be_ she thought sadly. Whoever had been sending her those messages had won and she was left without Nathan. The only guy she had ever seen herself being with forever. The tears pricked at her eyes as she realized that she would never have what she just dreamed about with Nathan again. He would move on and forget she ever existed and it was no one's fault but hers for not telling him about the letters. Climbing back into her bed, she ignored Allie's concerned eyes watching her as she snuggled back in the covers. Allie knew her cousin still wasn't ready to talk about anything and just wrapped her arms around the tiny brunette. Haley felt the arms wrap around her and she let the tears that had been prickling her eyes fall, before they turned into gut wrenching sobs for the loss of Nathan. Allie whispered soothingly words that everything would be okay as she stroked Haley's hair wondering what in the world had happened.

_**that's just fine  
that's just one of my names  
don't let the days go by  
could've been easier on you  
glycerine**_

---

Peyton looked at the clock and saw it was already 9:00 in the morning despite not being a morning person she felt restless as she tossed in her queen sized bed. Closing her eyes tightly and hoping for more sleep with no avail. She got up and started getting ready for her day. She was going to talk to Brooke about Derek and then after that she would go and talk to Haley about Julian being back in town. She didn't know how all this drama kept popping up in this small town. Grabbing her sketchpad she figured she would go to the bridge and sketch a little after running errands. She put it in her messenger bag before grabbing her iPod and some other art supplies and walking out the door. Getting into her comet she felt a sense of calmness wash over her as she drove to Brooke's house.

Getting out of her car, the blonde made her way to the front door before knocking on the door. She was going to tell Brooke she understood that she was scared for the chocolate mans safety. _I'll say something like I understand you are worried for him, but I am too. You have to understand though, this is his life. This is what he loves to do. What would you say if someone told you to quit your clothing line? Right you wouldn't because that is you, that is your life. Derek would never ask you to do that... yes that sounds good _she thought to herself before she rapped her knuckles on the door and waited for Brooke to answer the door.

To her surprise though, when the door swung open it was not the bubbly brunette, but Owen. _What the hell?_ She thought. Her green eyes narrowing as she noticed he wasn't wearing a shirt. Pushing past him she walked into the house and found Brooke cooking eggs.

"What the hell did you do with Owen?" She screeched as Brooke looked at Peyton's face. The blonde's hands on her hips, as steam seemed to be radiating off the blonde. Brooke's eyes look at her guiltily.


	20. Eve, the Apple of my eye

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone I bet you are all surprised I am finally updating well I am. Hopefully next week I will have more time to write now that my sis is going back to work and I wont have to run errands with her. Anyways thank you soooo much to everyone who reviewed, you have no idea how good your reviews make me feel. Also a BIG thanks to Allie for beta'ing this chapter and for Hayley helping me when I got stuck. Enjoy this chapter and please review. So now I present chapter 20. **

**Song:** Eve, the Apple of my eye by Bell X1

**Quote:** "One must learn to love, and go through a good deal of suffering to get to it... and the journey is always towards the other soul."

---David Herbert

* * *

_  
_

_"What the hell did you do with Owen?" She screeched as Brooke looked at Peyton's face. The blonde's hands on her hips, as steam seemed to be radiating off the blonde. Brooke's eyes look at her guiltily._

"Its not what you think Peyton I swear," Brooke told the blonde her eyes pleading to at least listen to what she was saying.

"Oh, so you're a mind reader now is that right? Well, what it looks like is that you went behind MY brothers back and are fucking another man," Peyton yelled crudely. "You know, I knew you in cheer camp and when everyone else went and talked about you fucking all these other guys, I defended you. I was glad you started dating my brother but you get into one little fight and the next morning when I come in to check on you before going back to the hospital and see Owen, a guy you supposedly don't like answer the door…shirtless I might add and I…I just thought you weren't the same girl from high school. I guess some people really do never grow up." Peyton said bitterly looking at the brunette with hate and disgust before walking out of the kitchen and making sure to push Owen out of her way and slamming the door.

Brooke tried to push back the flood of tears that threatened to escape but couldn't hold them in when Owen walked in shirtless. "I'm sorry," he told her as he wrapped his arms around her and let him cry into his bare shoulder.

_**You left it, I sent it  
I want it back  
You left it, I sent it  
I want it back**_

_Flashback_

"_Come with me," he gently ordered holding his hand out for her to grasp._

"_Why should I?" Brooke quipped back raising an eyebrow quizzically._

"_What do you have to lose?" Owen asked before turning around and walking toward the exit. Fighting the internal battle of whether to go with him or not she quickly grabbed her purse and followed him._

"_Just because I am following you does not mean I like you," Brooke huffed as she finally caught up to Owen._

"_If that's what you think," Owen told her as they continued walking._

"_Where are we going?" Brooke asked not liking she didn't know where she was going I mean after all how well do I know him? I just met the guy this year and what if he was planning to take me to an old abandoned building and killing me? Oh my gosh what am I doing? She asked herself. _

_Owen looked over at her and chuckled. He could see she had no idea where he was taking her but this was something she needed. He knew from all the times at working at Tric that she loved shopping and he was at least smarter than that to take her to a mall._

_Brooke looked up and her eyes widened in surprise when they realized where they were. "Why are we here?" Brooke asked the confusion showing in her voice as she looked up at Owen._

_"Because I figured you just needed to have some fun and remember what its like to be a kid" Owen told her grabbing her hand and leading her to the jungle gym._

_"Thank you," Brooke whispered as she looked at him and gave him a small smile before climbing up the ladder. As soon as she got the top she looked back and saw Owen climbing up and slid down the slide just when he made it to the top. "Can't catch me," she hollered up at him before running back up the ladder as he flew down the slide._

_**If I had you here, I'd clip your wings  
Snap you up and leave you  
sprawling on my pin  
This plan of mine is oh so very lame  
Can't you see the grass is  
greener where it rains**_

_"I bet I can," He told her walking up the slide as she quickly jumped across the monkey bars laughing as she went. As she looked back at Owen climbing down the ladder she felt a smile on her face. She hadn't felt this carefree in such a long time. Making her ways to the swings she started pumping her legs. Before she could get very high she felt the swing jerk underneath her and jerk to a stop. "Caught ya," Owen smirked looking down at her. The playful air around them now tense as their eyes locked. It seemed as if time slowed down as Owen leaned down, his lips inching towards hers. Just before his lips touched hers she turned her face so he caught her cheek._

_"I'm sorry I can't," She whispered looking at him brokenly. "Then how about I push you," Owen said not wanting to push her._

_"Okay," Brooke mumbled as he started pushing her into the sky._

_"You know when ever I feel like crap I always find a playground. It makes you forget all your troubles. So just relax and have fun," Owen told her as Brooke started to smile. After a little while the awkward air surrounding them dissipated and they started talking about their childhoods. It was getting late so they decided to go back home but before they got back to Brooke's they stopped to get some alcohol._

End Flashback

"Well we could have another water fight," Owen told Brooke making her smile half heartily.

"Isn't that what got us in this trouble anyways?" Brooke asked stepping back from Owen and motioning to Owen's bare chest.

"Yea you're right. I won anyways," Owen told her smirking.

"No you didn't," Brooke said before reaching behind her and pulling out the kitchen sink sprayer.

---

Peyton made her way into the hospital her mind wandering with what she was going to tell her brother. _He really cared for Brooke and they hadn't even really been broken up and she had already moved on. Bitch,_ Peyton thought to herself. Finally making it to Derek's room, she walked in and saw Julian sitting by an empty bed.

"Where's Derek?" Peyton asked her voice tight as she wrapped her arms across her chest in a defensive stance.

"He's getting some tests run but why don't you stay here and we can talk. You know there's a empty bed in here right now and he wont be back for a little while so you know we could always knock you up again and then you can kill another helpless child," Julian told her standing up and making his way toward Peyton.

Peyton felt her eyes begin to tear up as she felt like she was two feet tall. Her and Julian used to be great friends and since Haley was busy grieving over Josh, Peyton had told him about losing Anna and how she blamed herself for her death. Julian had been sweet comforting Peyton about how it wasn't her fault and that he would be there for her while she grieved until he asked her out and she told him no. That's when the emotional abuse started. He would tell her it was her fault Anna died and that she was a monster and she would never be a good mother so it was a good thing that Anna died.

"Come on don't you want to kill another person? Huh?" Julian taunted using his arms trapping her against the wall.

She couldn't stop the tears from cascading down her cheeks no matter how much she wanted to tell him to fuck off, it seemed her voice wouldn't come out. His head moved down his lips millimeters from hers. She pursed her lips tightly as the tears continued to fall. Before his lips could touch hers the hospital door flew open and Derek was wheeled in. Julian jumped away from Peyton as she quickly brushed the tears from her eyes, not wanting her brother to know that Julian had been making her cry. The nurses got Derek situated back on the bed and under the covers when he saw Julian sitting on the chair next to his bed and Peyton against the wall.

"Everything okay?" Derek asked looking between his sister and his friend.

"Yea…I just…I forgot I have to do something I will come back later" Peyton said looking at the ground not meeting her brothers stare as she walked back out of the hospital room and into her comet. As soon as she got into her comet, she reached into the glove department and pulled out a sonogram picture. It was the only one she had of Anna and she looked at it. Letting the tears she had held in from her brother stream down her eyes and she held onto the picture for dear life. "I am so sorry baby I am so sorry," she told the picture rocking back and forth in her seat just chanting the same mantra.

---

"So you going to tell me what happened?" Allie asked Haley when she walked into the kitchen.

"What do you mean?" Haley asked reaching into the fridge and grabbing a water bottle.

"Oh, I don't know the crying yourself to sleep, not talking to your boyfriend or Peyton…sitting in your bed watching chick flicks and eating ice cream. With you, that screams that something's wrong, and I've been a good cousin. I let you do that all day yesterday and I didn't push the last time I found you crying but you need to tell me what's wrong." Allie pressed.

_**You left, I died,  
I went and you cried  
You came, I think  
But I never really know  
I've served my time  
I've watched you climb  
The wrong incline  
But what do I know**_

"I'm fine Allie don't worry about it." Haley told her waving a hand with a flick of the wrist like it was no big deal.

"Haley Bob James why are you being so closed off?" Allie asked the compassion and sympathy showing in her eyes.

Haley knew her cousin just wanted to help, but if she wasn't going to tell Nathan about the letters, she defiantly wasn't going to tell her cousin. Even if her cousin was a black belt in karate she wouldn't bare if it she lost another person. "How's Steph's wedding plans?" Haley questioned needing to lead Allie into a different subject.

Allie felt her frustration bubbling. Haley was obviously upset at something and she wouldn't let her in. "Fine" She answered curtly.

"How's Steph liking Vancouver?" Haley asked about Allie's best friend, who she had gotten to know while visiting Allie, and hoping to get a better response out of Allie.

"She's in San Antonio right now making wedding plans and then she will be flying out here in a couple of weeks to visit. She should meet Nathan," Allie said carefully watching Haley's face for any response.

Haley twitched when she heard Nathan's name. She knew she was protecting him. After all she hadn't gotten any letters since she had broken up with him threatening his life. "I can't believe they are getting married so soon."

_**Accept it, Don't let it  
Turn the screw  
Accept it, And let it  
Scream back at you**_

"Yeah Robyn, you know Steph's other best friend is supposed to be flying to the States in a while to go to the wedding. She really seems to like her job in Scotland, she even found a boyfriend." Allie said frustrated with Haley changing the subject but not knowing how she could get her to open up. For once her cousin was being tight lipped and there was no way Allie was going to find out what happened.

---

Lucas rolled over and felt himself come in contact with a soft body, his arms wrapped around the woman beside him and let her curl into his body.

He looked next to him and saw the women beside him, her breathing even as he felt the guilt seep into his bones. _What did I do?_ He asked himself. _Why do I continually lead this girl on?_ But as he felt her bare skin against his chest he couldn't help but wish it was someone else. Instead of golden brown hair spread across the pillow, he wanted a mess of blonde curls. Instead of blue eyes, he wanted the soulful emerald ones, which he could lose himself in. He wanted Peyton.

Lindsey took a deep breath and decided to ask Lucas if he wanted to get some breakfast. She really hoped that this meant they were exclusive now. _Should I ask while we're still in bed or should I wait awhile?_ She asked herself. Looking at his crystal blue eyes staring down at her she decided to wait and lay her head on his chest and listen to his heart beat. Lucas just lay there stroking the golden brown hair and thinking about how there really was no way he would get Peyton Sawyer after making love to another woman.

_**Now this applies both  
equally to you and I  
The only thing we share  
Is the same sky  
These empty metaphors  
They're all in vain  
Like can't you see the  
grass is greener where  
it rains**_

---

The next morning Haley walked into the building, her heels clacking against the tile as she made it to the front office to pick up her mail. She hadn't heard from Nathan all weekend and she was glad. Hopefully she wouldn't run into him today. It wouldn't be too hard. She would pick up her mail, then go straight to her classroom and stay there all day. She had already texted Peyton and asked if she wanted to have lunch in her room today. Figuring her plan worked, she wouldn't have to see Nathan today. A part of her desperately wanted to see him yet she knew this was for the best. He was safe now. He could move on and forget she ever existed and he would still be able to breathe and coach kids. Pushing her hair behind her ears she walked into the office and straight to the mailboxes not wanting to talk to any of the other teachers. Their weren't many young teachers here and although she didn't go to school here, it was still a little awkward.

"Miss James how are you?" Mr. Kaminski asked, walking into the small mail room and going into his mailbox.

"I'm okay and you?" Haley asked politely knowing that this history teacher really tried connecting to his students and not trying to be one of them, like so many other teachers and every time he saw her he would always ask how she was doing and if she needed help with anything despite teaching two different subjects.

"Good. My wife and I went to that restaurant you recommended and she really loved it so thanks," he told her giving her a smile.

"Aw that's good," Haley said glad that they had a great night out.

"Well I better go. I have students waiting to retake their civil war test so have a nice day," he said waving and walking out of the office.

Haley smiled slightly as she shuffled through her mail and started to walk out of the office. She discreetly rolled her eyes at the sound of Carrie flirting with someone.

"So how was your weekend?" Carrie asked flirtatiously her eyes practically undressing the man in front of her.

_Poor guy _she thought, curiosity getting the better of her and she looked up. Her breath caught in her throat as she saw Nathan, his blue jeans slung nicely on his hips as he wore a maroon dress shirt buttoned up with just a smidge of his white t-shirt peaking through. His hair was gelled and styled and she couldn't help the smile that fell on her face. _He looks amazing _she thought to herself. _I guess it's a good thing I broke up with him. He doesn't seem upset about the break up. _She felt the tears well in her eyes as she realized he was already over her and it had only been a couple days.

"It was okay," Nathan told the brunette in front of him not wanting to divulge he had spent the whole weekend hung up on Haley and the only reason he was here today was because the team had a game on Friday and they needed to beat the Oak Lake Huskies since one of Nathan's rival now coached them. Damien West that guys name still left a taste of bitterness on his tongue. Nathan couldn't help but smirk as he remembered when he beat Damien for the state championship his senior year.

_**In the garden Snake was a charmin'  
And Eve said let's give it a try  
Now lead us not into temptation  
But no matter how hard I try  
When in the garden and  
Snake is a charmin'  
And Eve says let's give it a try  
Eve is the apple of my eye**_

Nathan glanced up when he heard the intake of breath and his eyes latched onto Haley's. She looked amazing her hair was down with a clip holding half of it back, the curls cascading down her back as her light blue v-neck shirt fit her showing off her curves with a little bit of ruffles on the sleeves and black dress pants covered her shapely legs. Haley broke the gaze and looked back at the mail in her hands.

Wanting to make Haley jealous Nathan decided to lay on some of the Scott charm. "So Carrie how was your weekend?" Nathan asked leaning against the secretary's desk.

"It was good," Carrie swooned. "Do you want to go out Wednesday?" She asked making sure her cleavage was showing for Nathan.

"I really can't. I should be strategizing and stuff. Big game Friday night. You should come," Nathan told her nonchalantly.

"I'd love to," Carrie told him a big smile etched onto her face. _Nathan Scott finally asked me out_ she thought happily, _I knew that Haley James bitch wouldn't be able to keep him. Who would want her when they could have me?_ She questioned herself.

Haley felt her throat close as she overheard Nathan inviting Carrie to the game. Keeping her eyes glued to the tile she walked out of the office and into the hallway making a beeline to her classroom while trying to remember everything she wanted to say about the Great Gatsby to her class so she wouldn't break down. Her thoughts of course kept straying to what she witnessed. _You wanted him to move on. This way he will be able to live his life. So what if Carrie's a slut, maybe he can fall in love with her. _That statement really wanted her to cry. She wanted him to be in love with her like she was in love with him.

---

"Hey," Peyton said walking into Haley's classroom her sack lunch in her hand.

"Hi," Haley said looking up from correcting a paper and giving a small smile to Peyton.

"So, you wont believe what happened the other day," Peyton said her voice laced with anger.

"What?" Haley asked perplexed.

"I went over to Brooke's cause her and Derek got into a fight and you will never guess who answered the door."

"Who?" Haley questioned taking her sandwich out of her bag as Peyton paced in front of her desk.

"Owen…half dressed. You know I had heard all the damn rumors about her and I knew how she treated guys when we were at cheer camp, but damn it I thought she had grown up! I introduced them…I can't believe she would do this to my brother!" Peyton said her voice rising with every word.

"Well are you sure something happened?" Haley asked. She hadn't known Brooke for very long, but she could tell that the perky brunette really seemed to care for the dark skinned man.

"Well…he was half dressed what am I suppose to believe? He lives right next to her so if something didn't happen how come he didn't just go to his own house to change? Huh? Cause they had sex that's why!" Peyton said sitting down before she looked at the type of sandwich Haley had. "Uh oh what happened?" Peyton asked knowingly raising an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?" Haley questioned.

"Peanut butter and banana? Really Hales? If something wasn't wrong you wouldn't need a comfort sandwich. Is it Nathan?" the curly blonde asked.

"We broke up," Haley said taking another bite of her sandwich.

"What happened? I thought you two were so happy?"

"It just…it just didn't work out." Haley said not able to meet her friend's eyes.

"Are you okay?" Peyton asked concerned.

"Yea I will be" Haley answered. At least I hope so she thought to herself.

"Well it's his loss" Peyton told her.

_**And I lie behind you  
And a cradle you in the palm of me  
And I pat your hair down  
I think will we sink or swim?  
'Cause we could do either on a whim**_

Before Haley had a chance to say anything the bell ring signaling the end of lunch.

"Well I guess I will see you later. How about I come over with a tub of ice cream and we watch movies tonight?" Peyton asked stopping by the door.

"Sure. Allie's in town and I'm sure she'd be happy to see you," Haley told the curly blonde as Peyton nodded and yelled a good bye before walking out of the classroom.

---

After school was done Haley ran to the parking lot and into her car not wanting to run into Nathan again at the office. Getting out of her car she walked to her mailbox and grabbed the mail flipping through it. _Bills, Bills, bank statement, oooh People_ she thought walking into her house before throwing it on the kitchen counter and slipping off the black heels and walking to her bedroom rummaging around her drawer for a pair of sweat pants and a tank top.

Finding her university floor sweatpants and a purple tank top she grabbed a pony tail off of her dresser and threw her hair up before going back down to the kitchen to flip through the magazine. Seizing the magazine she dropped an envelope. Picking it up and opening it she saw it was an invitation to Steph and Jared's wedding.

_She deserves happiness after that other asshole _she thought bringing People with her into the living room and sitting on the couch she started flipping through the pages. Half way through the magazine the doorbell rang. Glancing up at the clock she wondered if Peyton was already there. Getting up she made her way to the door and opened it noticing a white envelope laying on the welcome mat.

Looking left and right she saw headlights at the end of the block. Furrowing her brows she opened the envelope and her breath caught in her throat running to the end of the driveway to try and catch a glimpse of the car. Her hands shook as she reread the slip of paper.

**Now your ex-boy toy wont get hurt and soon you will be all mine **

_Oh god_ she thought running back to her house and closing the door making sure to lock the door before crumpling on the floor next to the door.


	21. The Grace

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone sorry for making you wait so long for this chapter but I'm taking 3 English classes that are keeping me busy and my computer had to get fixed :o( I still don't have it back yet but luckily I kept this story on my removable drive so the chapter I had started a while ago I only had to add too. Originally I was going to wait to post this until I had the next chapter halfway written or completely written but I think you guys have waited too long and I am so sorry for making you wait. I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I want to give a HUGE thanks to everyone who is still reading this story and those who keep reviewing. Reviews always make my day. I made this a longer chapter to prove how sorry I am and I will hopefully update the next chapter faster. Thanks to Allie for reading over this and telling me what had to be fixed and for helping me find a song. So without further ado I give you chapter 21.**

**Song: **The Grace by Neverending White Lights and feat. Dallas Green

**Quote: **One Day, One Hour, One minute, one second can change your life forever.

-- Kelly aka HJS-NS-23

* * *

_No. Oh God,__ she thought running back to her house and closing the door making sure to lock the door before crumpling on the floor next to the door._

_What am I going to do? She asked herself her hands shaking as tried to take deep breaths and stay calm. _

_Knock knock_

_Oh God what if he already came back for me? She thought her body convulsing with fear as she tried to stand up. _Taking a deep breath she looked out the peephole her heart beating wildly in her chest until she saw the curly blonde locks of her best friend. Calming herself down she opened the door and gave Peyton a half-hearted smile.

"Hey Blondie," Haley said waving Peyton in before sticking her head out the door to make sure no one else was out there and closed the door dead bolting it before making her way to the kitchen where she knew Peyton would be. Even thought she knew Peyton was suppose to be coming over she still couldn't help the uneasiness that sat in her stomach after reading the note.

"So have you talked to Brooke yet?" Haley asked when she got into the kitchen and seeing Peyton put the popcorn in the microwave.

"No," Peyton told her stubbornly.

"Peyt you really should talk to Brooke and ask her what happened there might be a really good excuse. Plus you don't want to lose your friendship over a miscommunication." Haley told her. _Like I should've told Nathan what was going on_ she thought sadly.

_Maybe Haley's right maybe I should talk to Brooke. I really hope I was wrong but she does have a past that's less then innocent but she never cheated on a boyfriend, _her head screamed back at her. _But I have a past too. Everyone does. Okay I will go and talk to her about it I guess. _Peyton said making up her mind.

"Anyways how's Derek?" Haley asked knocking Peyton out of her thoughts.

"He's okay. I didn't tell him about Brooke. He should be out of the hospital in a few days if everything goes okay."

"That's really good news" Haley said moving around the kitchen and pulling out the popcorn butter from the cupboard.

"Yeah," Peyton said with a small smile. Pulling out the popcorn and opening the bag she dumped it into the glass bowl and moved to throw the bag away as Haley moved to the bowl and poured the extra butter in it.

Grabbing the bowl and the bag of M&M's the two girls made it into the living room.

"What movie do you wanna watch?" Haley asked settling into the couch and putting the popcorn bowl on her lap.

"How about Pirates of the Caribbean?" Peyton asked browsing Haley's selection of movies.

"Okay," Haley said as the two girls watched the movie, both lost in their own thoughts.

---

Brooke was pacing back and forth in the hallway wringing her hands together nervously as she tried to get the courage to go into the dreaded hospital room. She stopped abruptly and, shaking, placed her hand on the cold metal doorknob. Taking a deep breath she opened it slowly hesitantly stepping inside the room.

The dark skinned man sat propped up in bed his brown eyes glued to the show in front of him as she slowly made her way toward the bed.

"Hi," she spoke softly as to not startle him. Her brown hair curled a top her shoulders.

"Hey," he said back trying to decipher what was going on in her head and how to approach the topic of her last visit.

They listened to the silence the TV droning on in the small room and the clock on the wall softly ticking the seconds away.

"I'm sorry," they both said looking at the other and breaking the awkward silence that had enveloped them.

"You go first," Brooke urged nervously awaiting what he would say to her and wondering if Peyton had talked to him about seeing Owen at her house without a shirt on.

"I'm sorry that I didn't warn you more about dating me but the military is my life. Every day I wake up and I am proud of the man I am and that my job is to protect the country and it's something that is worth dying to me but I really do care for you Brooke. I just love what I do.

The tears silently streamed down her cheeks as she felt her heart swell with pride for the young marine she had grown to love.

"I'm sorry," Brooke rasped out. "I just…I love you" she said shrugging her shoulders. "I'm a selfish person because I don't want you hurt, but you make me so happy that I don't know what to say because I'm not sorry that I don't want you to die." She stood there waiting for him to make the next move.

"Come here" Derek, softly, whispered opening his arms as Brooke walked over to the bed and lay down next to him. His arms wrapped around her frame as she clung to his body neither knowing what was going to happen next.

---

After showing Peyton out Haley started cleaning up the kitchen. Putting the butter and the M&M's away she softly hummed to herself before getting ready for bed and falling into a sleepless slumber the letter burned into her memory and the image of Josh on the operating table. The smell of death in the hospital reminding her that this same man was now after her and she had no one to blame but herself for pushing Nathan away so he wouldn't be hurt saving her.

_"Hey honeybee," Josh said standing at the foot of her bed._

_Haley knew she was dreaming, but she was confused as to why Josh was here._

_"Hi," Haley said her eyebrows furrowing as she sat up in the bed._

_"You need to tell someone about the letters," he warned as Haley rolled her eyes. _

_"I'll be fine Josh. Don't worry I'm a big girl I can take care of myself." Haley told him powerfully trying to believe that she could handle anything as she ran a hand through her hair._

_Josh walked toward her and sat on the bed. "I love you Haley, you know that but if you don't tell someone you might join me up there he told her pointing to the sky. "And you have so much potential left here on earth! I know you're scared that Nathan could get hurt but you and I both know you need him. Look at you. You're a mess" Josh told her._

_"I am not" Haley denied. "I am fine without him in my life." She replied weakly desperately hoping he would believe her lie._

_"You love him. You look at him like I used to look at you, with love and admiration and he loves you too" He told her knowingly._

_"You mean loved right? Or lusted? Nathan doesn't care about me anymore…" Haley told him shaking her head negatively._Maybe he does care about me but he deserves better than me. He deserves someone who he doesn't always have to protect. He deserves a happy life and not some sad girl with a past like mine_ she thought sadly._

_Josh looked at her like she was crazy. "He loves you honey bee so much and you two need to face this psycho together or neither of you will survive."_

_"What are you talking about?" Haley asked her body trembling with fear._

_"Be strong, confide in Nathan and you will be okay. Tell him you love him and please make sure he never takes you for granted because you are amazing." Josh told her standing up._

_"Wait," Haley said frantically scrambling to get out of the bed and standing without falling. "What do you mean survive?" She asked her brain just now processing what he had said._

_"To live honey bee. Be safe I will make sure to keep an eye on you." Josh looked at her once more before whispering goodbye and vanishing into thin air, Haley closed her eyes, smelling his aftershave in the room._

The room filled with a beeping noise and Haley opened her eyes, except now she was lying in her bed and the clock said 6:15 am. What just happened? She wondered her mind on over drive trying to process the information from her dream or whatever the hell that was.

She walked into her bathroom her mind on heavy with all these different thoughts as she got ready for the day.

---

Peyton walked into the staff room her ear phones blaring The Cure from her I-pod as she shuffled through her bag looking for her cell phone before and thinking about what she should say to Brooke when she rammed into a hard body knocking her back to the present.

"Watch it," she bit back her loose curls covering her face.

"Sorry," Skills mumbled shuffling through plays for this week's game.

"Skills?" Peyton said looking up and seeing the man in front of her.

"What dawg?" Skills asked irritated.

"Can we talk?" Peyton asked motioning to the table in the room.

"I guess" Skills said following Peyton to the table and sitting down motioning for Peyton to begin talking.

"I'm sorry," she told him sincerely fiddling with a curl.

"For running into me its fine like I said I really don't want to talk to you" Skills said starting to stand up.

"No for what happened between us…and our friendship." Peyton clarified.

Skills tried to get his face hard and unwavering. Crossing his arms against his chest he tried to pretend he didn't care. _I do still love her and if we can't be in a relationship I would still want to be her friend._ _I really miss her but she led me on and instead of telling me she didn't want me to be more than friends she let me believe I had a chance. You know she didn't do it purposely _he told himself. _But it still hurt and I don't know if I can trust her. _

_**In better days I've been known to listen  
I go to waste,  
all my time is missing**_

"I didn't mean to kiss Lucas that night and I didn't mean to hurt you but a part of me has always loved Lucas but I love you too so I needed to know who I was in love with. It wasn't right to lead you both on, but in the end I did and I miss having you in my life. You are my best guy friend and I miss you." Peyton told him trying to fight the tears burning against her eyelids. _Please let him forgive me_ she thought to herself _please_. "I don't know what I can say or do to get back into your life as your friend but me and Lucas aren't together…I dunno if we will ever be but I am in love with him but I never wanted to lose you as a friend and I really hope you can forgive me." Peyton spoke grabbing her bag and walking away to leave Skills with his thoughts.

He stood there for a few minutes trying to debate running after her or just saying goodbye to their friendship for good. He still had a lot to think about as he left the teachers' lounge and made it to the coach's office.

---

Lucas was sitting in his room trying to write his book but his head just wasn't in it. Things with Lindsey were starting to get serious and as much as he wished that she could replace Peyton in his heart she hadn't even made a dent yet.

A knock on the door quickly brought him out of his reverie and he walked to the door. "Hey," he said leaning down to kiss the cheek of his girlfriend. He knew he should break up with her soon and quit leading her on but a part of him liked the security of knowing someone really did care for him. "So I was just about to start making dinner," he told her walking out of him room as she followed behind him.

"Really? Well good," she chuckled before sitting down at the table.

"What do you want for dinner?" He asked her as he rummaged through the cupboards to see what they had.

"How about hamburgers…with pickles?" She asked smiling.

"Sure I think I have some hamburger here," he said moving to the freezer and taking some out.

"Cool," Lindsey replied. "So how was your day? Get any writing done?" She asked curiously. Lindsey worked at her dad's editing company and smiled when she found out that Lucas was trying to write a book.

"Not really kind of in a rut." He told her honestly making dinner for the two of them.

"Anything I can help with?" She asked trying to be helpful.

"You want to toss the salad?" He asked pointing to the fridge for her to take out the lettuce and other vegetables.

"Sure," Lindsey said. A_nything to keep my brain occupied,_ she thought to herself nervous of his reaction to the news she had to tell him.

The two finished making dinner each of their minds focused on something else. Lindsey's on the news she had to tell him while Lucas debated on breaking up with her. It really wasn't fair for him to be dating Lindsey when he loved Peyton but maybe if Peyton saw Lucas and Lindsey together again she would finally be ready to fight for them.

The duo sat down opposite each other at the small table when Lucas noticed Lindsey hadn't answered his question about what movie they should watch that night.

"Are you okay?" Lucas asked as he caught her staring into space for what seemed like the millionth time since they had sat down to dinner.

"I need to tell you something," she replied her eyes boring into his as her hands shook nervously.

"Okay whatever it is everything will be okay," Lucas told her reaching over the table and grasping her hands.

"I think I'm pregnant." She told him trying to sound confident, her nervous eyes staring into his shocked blue orbs.

_**I'm mapping out my ending,  
it's never gonna happen now  
these things are condescending  
with everybody backing down**_

Lucas felt the air whoosh out of his lungs at the news. He certainly wasn't expecting that one.

---

It was Wednesday and Peyton had decided to go and talk to Brooke about what she had witnessed.

Getting out of her black comet, her converses slapping against the cement as she made her way towards the door, she knew she had to hear what really happened that night. Even if Brooke had done something with Owen, she was still her friend and Haley was right, she needed to get Brooke's side of the story.

Knocking on the door she felt the butterflies in her stomach as she bounced on her feet waiting for Brooke to answer the door.

Brooke was looking over some sketched when she heard the knocking glancing at the clock. She frowned wondering who was at the door before getting up and answering it. The stack of sketches still in her hands. Opening the door the smile was wiped off her face as she saw the curly blonde wringing her hands nervously together.

"Peyton," she said curtly still hurtful of the way one of her good friends could think so little of her.

"Hey, can we talk?" Peyton asked.

"I guess. Come in," Brooke said ushering her into her house and to the living room.

"That shirt is really nice," Peyton said leaning over and looking at one of the sketches on coffee table.

"Thanks," Brooke told her, knowing that she had sketched it figuring it could be something that the blonde in front of her could wear to work.

"Look, I know I jumped to conclusion the other day when I saw Owen here without a shirt on and I guess…I guess now I'm here to let you explain" Peyton said throwing her shoulders up before slouching down again.

"I would never cheat on Derek Peyton," Brooke said sitting across from Peyton on her couch. Owen was just being a good friend. Me and Derek had just had a big fight and I was at Tric and Owen was there and he just took me to a playground to let loose and then he came over and we talked and I was making breakfast and we got into a water fight but he was on his way back to his house when you came over…although I really don't have to justify my actions to you. Peyton we're friends but you didn't need to jump to conclusions about me cheating on your brother. I thought you knew me better than that…" Brooke said trying to keep the hurt out of her voice.

"But I am NOT the same girl I used to be Peyton and it really hurts that you can't see how much I have changed since we knew each other in high school. I think you should go," Brooke said standing up and walking to the door.

"Okay," Peyton agreed walking to the door, "but just so you know I can tell you have changed I just don't want my brother to get hurt especially when he's already in the hospital and I can tell how much he loves you even if he hasn't said it yet" Peyton said walking out the door and leaving Brooke to battle with her internal self about whether she should forgive Peyton or not.

---

"I think I'm pregnant." Lindsey had told him two days ago. Now the two were waiting anxiously for the test results from their home pregnancy test. Both Lindsey and Lucas were a bundle of nerves. Lindsey was happy she always imagined having kids and Lucas would be a great dad.

_**You pray to stars that can help you get by  
and all at once you forget to try**_

_Please don't let her be pregnant,_ Lucas begged knowing that even if she was he would still love the baby, but she wasn't who he wanted to be the mother of his child. He could imagine their little girl her blonde locks curled like her mothers and her emerald eyes with his love of literature and her mom's passion for art. She would be perfect. But now here he was waiting anxiously to see if he would be having a kid with another woman. The beeping from his phone let them know that the time was up and Lindsey got off the bed and walked to the bathroom getting the test off the counter, looking at it and then walking back to Lucas, a huge smile on her face.

"We're pregnant." She whispered happily her lips pressing onto his as the image of the beautiful green eyed little girl vanished from his vision. He could never have that with Peyton if he had a child with Lindsey it wouldn't be fair to Peyton to saddle her down with a kid when she had so many opportunities to accomplish in her life.

_**I'd go there if you let me,  
they're never gonna find me now  
my life is always empty  
and in and out of doubt  
**_

---

It was Thursday, the night before the big game, and to say Nathan Scott was nervous would be an understatement. This was a big game for them. He needed to beat Damien West. He had spent the whole week watching games and strategizing how to win. He quickly finished benching the weights and got up grabbing a water bottle and draining it before picking up a towel and wiping his brow with it. Ever since he and Haley had broken up he had taken to lifting a lot more.

_**You're not coming back for me, these things they will never be  
I'm so used to being wrong, so put me where I belong  
**_

After moping around the weekend he decided he was being a wimp and threw himself into his work. _So what if she doesn't love me I don't care…_he tried unsuccessfully lying to himself for the millionth time this week, but his heart ached for her. He loved her and wanted to be with her. Walking out of his gym he moved to the living room to go over the game tapes once again, just like when he used to play basketball he would be wired for the game, something's never changed.

He still couldn't believe he told Carrie to come to the game. As he walked out of the office he realized it sounded somewhat like a date. He hadn't meant it like that. Sure Carrie was an attractive woman but she was nothing compared to Haley. He shook his head trying to rid his thoughts of Haley and instead pressed play on the remote and picking up his notebook watched how Oak Lake Huskies scored and who was their best shooters.

---

Lindsey and Lucas walked out of the hospital together. Lucas tried to have a smile on his face and Lindsey smiled happily and held his hand chattering about everything they would have to get for the baby.

After finding out that the test was positive Lucas had told Lindsey they should go to the hospital just to be double sure. Lindsey agreed telling him she was sure she was pregnant and couldn't wait to tell all their friends.

"So, you will call me once the hospital calls you right?" Lucas asked as they reached Lindsey's car and he opened the driver's door for her to get in.

"Yes and are we still on for after the game?" Lindsey asked getting in the car.

"Yeah I will see you after the game" He told her giving her a peck on the cheek before closing the door and getting into his own car.

_**I'll get back to you,  
God knows I try,  
but I still lose  
and I get back to you,  
these days run by,  
but I still lose  
**_

---

The day seemed to fly by for Haley, which she was very grateful for. The only problem she had was getting her students to pay attention since most of the students were anxious because it was the weekend and the huge rivalry again Bear Creek. But now it was 3:30 and Haley was grading some papers before she left, knowing she wouldn't want to do them this weekend and straightening up her classroom.

_**Angels say they can make you suffer  
they give and take like a vicious lover**_

After she picked up some of the stuff on her desk and threw it away she started to put the piles of papers she hadn't gotten to correct and put them in her bag to take home. Maybe she would ask Allie if she wanted to grab Chinese for dinner tonight and then tomorrow work on finishing grading these papers so that her students would know how they did on them and not have to wait anxiously for their grades. Haley had her back to the door as she zipped up her bag.

_**When all this loses meaning,  
You'll never want it back somehow  
Awake but still I'm dreaming  
And never waking up**_

---

The man walked down the hallway to where her classroom was. He had made a quick detour to the office to find out what room Haley James was in and now he was finally going to have her. He felt the excitement build inside of him as he got nearer to her door. After he had seen her break up with the boyfriend he knew he had to keep a low profile, but now that the loser hadn't talked to Haley all week he figured he was safe and he could finally get what was really his. He saw her, her back to him as he felt his pants tighten as she wiggled her butt.

Walking in he closed the door behind him and locked it reaching in his sweatshirt for the black revolver he had in there just in case she wouldn't willingly grant him what he wanted.

The door closed and the man stepped up and locked the door startling Haley as she turned around and looked up. _Please let it be Nathan_ she thought hopefully, _no you don't want to be Nathan it will just be to hard_ she reprimanded herself.

_**You're not coming back for me, these things they will never be  
I'm so used to being wrong, so put me where I belong**_

"What…what are you doing here?" Haley stuttered before she looked down and saw the gun in the man's hand.

"If isn't the object of my desire," the man said his eyes undressing the woman in front of him.

"What?" Haley was barely able to whisper.

"I'm here to get what's mine" The man spoke inching closer to Haley.

"Oh my God it was you!" Haley said her voice surprised as she quivered in fear for her life as the gun pointed towards her.

_**Alone...Where I'm not alone**_

_**Alone...Where I'm not alone**_

_**Alone...Where I'm not alone**_

_**Alone...Where I'm not alone**_

_**Alone...Where I'm not alone**_

_**  
Alone...Alone**_


	22. Slept So Long

**HJS-NS-23- Okay so whose surprised by how fast I updated this chapter :o) Don't worry I am too lol, but the reading was light for all my English classes and no huge projects were due so I had time to write. Plus I have always had the idea of this scene in my head. Anyways this chapter is what everything was leading up to and I really hope I don't disappoint any of you. This chapter was very much inspired and poured out of my fingertips more easily than I had ever imagined. I hope you all like it and I will try and update as soon as possible again. **

**A HUGE thanks goes out to Allie for putting up with all my questions and reading over this chapter like 3 times and telling me that it was ready to post lol. Thank you to xjackullin, mcc3654, RedRoom323, ItalHunni28, Maaiike87, naley19, gg-ghgrl775, laperkin, steffy2106 and LiZ457 for reviewing the last chapter. The song I used is from the Stalkers P.O.V. and PLEASE LISTEN TO IT WHILE READING THIS CHAPTER, you can find it easily on youtube. Enjoy and don't forget to review :o).**

**Song: **Slept So Long by Jay Gordon

**Quote:** Nothing is so much to be feared as fear.

- Henry David Thoreau

* * *

_"I'm here to get what's mine" The man spoke inching closer to Haley._

_"Oh my God, it was you!" Haley said her voice surprised as she quivered in fear for her life as the gun pointed towards her._

"You…. you were the one that who has been sending me those letters?" Haley hesitantly asked, her heart beating rapidly against her ribcage as her mind tried to process everything that was going on. The man that was standing in front of her, the man she had known almost all her life. Her breathing was anxious as her hands shook.

"I've always loved you Haley…even when you were with Josh…you were meant to be mine," the man said taking a step closer to her as Haley took a step back running into her desk.

"You…" Haley tried to remember the night of Josh's accident her mind already in overdrive as she remembered a letter he wrote, a few weeks ago.

_Flashback:_

_She finished her breakfast and went up to shower and change before going over to Peyton's. Slipping on a comfortable pair of jeans and a t-shirt she made her way downstairs and threw on her flip-flops, before walking out the door. Making sure the door was locked she noticed a piece of paper taped to it._

_Smiling she figured it was from Nathan and ripped it off the door and got into the car before tearing open the letter. Noticing it was typed on a computer she silently read it. She gasped in surprise, her hands shaking and body trembling as she reread it except this time out loud to herself._

"**Josh's death was not an accident and you better break up with Nathan before he dies next because of you."**

_The tears sprang to her eyes, before she threw the paper on the passenger seat and made her way to Peyton's._

_End Flashback_

_**Walking  
Waiting  
Alone without a care  
Hoping  
Hating  
Things that I can't bear**_

John started making his way towards her, his legs slowly and deliberately covering the ground as he held the gun in his hands as they lay lazily at his sides. Haley's eyes watched him, her feet frozen to the ground as he looked her up and down leeringly.

"You…you killed Josh? You killed your own brother?" Haley gasped in shock, her knees buckling under her as she grasped the table to keep her up. Her eyes were wide in terror as she looked around the room trying to find an escape.

John looked at her the lust swirling in his eyes as he saw the fear radiating off Haley's body, licking his lips he gave her a sickening smile that made her blood swirl.

"He had what I wanted so the punk had to die. If you wouldn't have run away we could have been together sooner," John said moving closer to Haley she tried to think of a way to escape. She looked around the classroom, the door was blocked, the wooden door had no windows except the one to the right, yet no one would be able to see in it from the outside because of all the posters she had hung up about famous English poets and authors. The only other escape she could see was her classroom window except that led to the courtyard and everyone was gone for the day.

She knew that if she ran he would chase her. She had seen enough horror movies to know that, but she never thought her life would become a horror movie.

He had a gun…he had killed Josh…he was capable of anything and she had no clue what to do. The tears started to build in her eyes as she tried to figure out a plan to get out of the room alive. She noticed the door and prayed that Nathan would come and save her. She tried to think of how much time she would have if she actually succeeded getting out the window would she make it to someone in time before he tried killing her for running away.

"But…it was a hit in run…they said that…a…a black truck hit his jeep…you…you didn't drive a black truck you…you had a blue Toyota prius." Haley said trying desperately to keep his mind off her as she tried to come up with a way to leave or at least get to her cell phone. She inched her way along her desk until she was standing behind it. John noticed and stepped in front of her desk smacking his hands on the wooden desk as Haley jumped in fright.

"DAMN IT HALEY" he hollered getting fed up of her running away from him. "I know you want me. YOU'RE THE one who gave me the hug and ASKED me how I was when I saw you at the cemetery. Now why are you trying to run away from me" he screamed, his face contorted with vehemence.

Haley glanced at the gun that was sitting on the desk unattended. _If I grab the gun I will be in control, but_ _am I fast enough?_ She thought biting her lip as she glanced quickly at the gun hoping that he wouldn't see the plan forming in her mind. John noticed her eyes and put his hand over the gun lying on the desk.

"It was the perfect plan," John said his eyes starting to stare off into space. "Steal a truck so I wouldn't be suspected. I knew he was going over to your house. God that boy was pathetic. He was so lucky, but he never realized what a jewel he had." John spoke moving around the desk so he was standing in front of Haley and blocking the door.

_**Did you think it's cool  
To walk right up  
And take my life  
And fuck it up  
Well did you?**_

She stood there, the panic building inside of her and the terror paralyzing her as the blood pounded in her ears, desperately hoping that someone would come and save her.

"I saw him leave the house and knew he was on his way to your house. I heard him practicing a speech to propose to you. I couldn't let you marry him. Not when you belong to me. I looked outside and saw was dark out, another reason I wouldn't be spotted. I had been planning this for a month, but when I found out he was about to propose to you I knew I had to strike now. I ran out of the house and drove to where I had hidden the truck in a storage garage. I knew the way he was going to go to your house. The dumbass never went any other way. I timed it all perfectly. I saw the stop lights on my side turn red and saw his jeep. I knew that was my chance. I slammed on the accelerator and hit the passenger side. I would've preferred to hit the driver's side but I would take what was dealt to me. I figured the impact of the car had killed him and gleefully drove back to where I'd abandoned my car and disposing of the truck. Imagine my surprise when I got home and Jake told me mom and dad were at the hospital. I was pissed. The fucker was supposed to be dead. When the doctor came out and told my family he died on the operating table I had to pretend to be upset and cry with my parents and brother, but I was ecstatic. You could finally be mine. There would be NOTHING standing in our way. I had to wait until after the funeral since mom kept me busy running all the errands for her poor son whose life ended tragically short" John said the bitterness creeping into his voice. "Her precious Josh was dead, and Jake was so consumed with grief that he never left his room. She thought I was being strong by not crying but she didn't know how happy I was the fucker was dead. He had EVERYTHING I wanted and I was going to get it. First thing was getting you. But your damn bulldog wouldn't leave your side." He spoke angrily. "And then you two left. It took me years to track you down. I still kept in touch with Jake knowing that he would eventually find out where you were, so when he said he ran into you at Tree Hill I knew where to go. I came down here excited that you would finally be mine. Except that dumbass that was with you. He was getting what I wanted. I thought if I scared you enough you would dump him and I was right. You had to save your precious Nathan. Didn't you?" He screamed. Before Haley could answer his voice spoke again.

"I saw you" he told her his voice disgusted and angry as he stepped closer to Haley.

Haley's face creased in confusion. _What did he mean he saw me?_ She thought to herself.

"What…what are you talking about?" Haley choked out, the ledge of the chalkboard pressing into her lower back painfully, since she had stepped back when he had stepped closer to her.

His eyes turned black in anger, his jaw clenched as his hand made a fist. John saw her pretend to be confused his hands shaking violently. _She needs to quit lying. She knows what I am talking about damn it! Why the hell is she pretending to be scared of __me? She wants me. I know she does_ he reaffirmed himself._ Why the hell is she trying to change the fucking subject_? Shaking his head he glared at her as he felt himself become more and more furious as she tried to portray innocence of what she had done to them. _To me_, John thought his eyes becoming slits as he breathed heavily slamming his hand against the chalkboard near her head.

"I saw you fucking him. On the couch and oh the way your delicate hands ran over his back as you threw your head back and made a perfect 'O' with your mouth." John seethed glaring at her as he trapped her against the board. He felt himself become hard with need as he remembered the delicate curves of her body, her hair as it cascaded down the couch.

Haley felt nauseous. _He watched? Oh my god_ she thought trying not to throw up, her eyes quickly falling closed when his hand hit the board, as her body trembled with uncertainty.

"Now I am going to get what is mine." He said pressing his lips forcibly to Haley's as she tried to push him away with all the strength she could muster. Feeling a small smile on her face when she had shoved him away from her body until she saw the look of fury in his eyes and grabbing her wrists his touch bruising her porcelain skin pinned them above her head. His eyes giving a triumph gleam as he started kissing her again. Thrusting his tongue through her lips that she had tried to seal together, wriggling her body as she tried to twist and turn away from him.

_**I see hell in your eyes  
Taken in by surprise  
Touching you makes me feel alive  
Touching you makes me die inside**_

Haley did the first thing that came to her mind when she felt his tongue ram into her mouth and bit down on it as hard as she could.

"DAMN IT Haley!" he yelled furiously backhanding her. Spitting the blood out of his mouth and on the floor glaring at Haley.

Haley clutched her cheek, the pain stinging. Her eyes, wide in shock and fearful as the enormity of the situation fell on her shoulders. He was going to rape her and there was nothing she could do and no one who could save her after she pushed Nathan away. _Please come save me Nathan_ she thought desperately, the tears brimming her eyes as she tried to be strong and fight John off of her.

---

Nathan was pacing around his office nervously. It had been almost a week since he had talked to Haley. He tried not to think of her, and had succeeded the most part until today when he reached in his desk drawer to grab some papers and came into a contact with a photo of her he'd taken a few months ago of her sleeping. She looked so peaceful, her wavy brown hair covered her face as her eyes were gently closed, her face like an angel's as she smiled about something in her dream, and that was when he took the picture.

_**Walking Waiting  
Alone without a care  
Hoping  
Hating  
Things that I can't bear**_

_I need to talk to her _he thought moving to the door before hesitating and looking at the clock on his desk, seeing it was already 3:45. They would have to start warming up for the game, but something in his stomach didn't feel right. An urgency to check on Haley overwhelmed him. _I have to see Haley now. I will just say that I have to know why she really broke up with me. I know she was lying and I need answers plus it will show me she's fine, _he thought._ I need a clear head before this game and I need to get my questions answered I deserve that much. _Marching out of the office and through the locker room he made his way towards Haley's classroom.

---

Walking back and forth in front of it he debated what to say. Needing to see her before he actually talked to her he looked at the window that was full of posters and saw a gap where he could look in. Peeking in he saw Haley pinned to the chalkboard by a man who held a gun. His heart started pumping erratically as he looked through the hole again making sure he saw what he thought he really saw. The adrenaline started pumping in his veins. _I have to save her_ he thought before reaching to open the door only to find out it was locked. "Damn it" he cursed. "Haley!" he screamed pounding on the door. He didn't care if the psycho got pissed at him he had to protect Haley. He loved her.

"Haley," he pounded. "Open the door," he yelled hammering on the door.

John looked from the door to Haley's face, the rage coming off him in waves as he saw his plan collapsing in front of his eyes. He had to shut the man outside up before someone notified the authorities.

Haley felt her heart soar when she heard Nathan's voice come booming into the classroom before her eyes met John's and she felt her heart stop beating at the way he was looking at the door. His face contorted in rage and red with fury, John walked quickly to the door and yanking it open, pointed the gun at Nathan. _I have to get to Haley _he thought not caring that the gun was pointed at him. He tried to walk to Haley but John wouldn't allow that. Using all his strength John used the butt of the gun, and rammed it into Nathan's back as hard as he could.

Nathan felt a sharp pain course down his spine as stopped in his tracks, his knees buckling under him as he fell to the floor. "Fuck" he yelled out. The pain in his back excruciating as he looked at Haley to make sure she was okay. Haley's hand covered her mouth as she watched Nathan collapse on the floor, her eyes staring at John before running to Nathan, as she saw John turn around to close and lock the door again.

Falling to her knees she wrapped her arms around him tightly to make sure he was really there. _He saved me_ she thought her heart swelling with love as she pulled his face up to look at it.

Nathan's face was contorted with pain, Haley's hands holding his cheeks he tried to smirk when he felt the pain start to subside.

A loud laugh caught their attention.

Their eyes met John's as a sly smile came onto his face. "Well Nathan I presume we finally meet," he said his southern twang coming out as the evil glinted in his eyes.

_So this is the man she tried to have a relationship with. Well he's not going to be alive here for long. Pretty boy should've stayed away _he thought_. He doesn't deserve her. I do. She's mine. She's always been mine. I have to make him pay for touching her. I have to show what happens when other guys get what's mine. _

_**Did you think it's cool  
To walk right up  
And take my life  
And fuck it up  
Well did you?**_

"Get the hell away from her, she's MINE!" John yelled pointing the gun at the two.

Nathan wrapped his arms tight around Haley. _I'm not letting anything happen to her. I love her _he thought looking into her scared eyes and brushing a stray piece of hair out of her face and tucking it behind her ear in a way to comfort her and show her he was okay. He moved his face so that his lips were level with her ear. "I will get us out of this," he whispered before glaring back at John.

Nathan remembered the time when he knew he loved Haley and proposed to her. It was just after they had made love. He knew he loved her then and wanted to be with her forever, to make sure nothing would ever happen to her. If it was the last thing he did he would make sure that Haley was safe and away from this psycho.

_Flashback:_

_Haley grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around the two as Nathan reached for the remote and turned the movie off. The only sound now was the rain pelting on the windows and roof._

_Haley nestled into Nathan's chest and had just closed her eyes when she heard him whisper into her ear._

"_Marry me!" _

_He held his breath as he waited for her reaction. He felt her body tense and quickly shut his eyes pretending to be sleeping. _I can't take the rejection if she says no. I don't want to scare her off. Shit I never should have blurted that out. I love her and I want to be with her forever, but I need to tell her I love her first. Okay I will just pretend to be sleeping and then she will forget it _he thought a part of him yearning to hear her answer but a bigger part knowing she would flip especially as he heard her intake a gasp of breath and her body tense when he whispered it into her ear._

_Her eyes opened in shock. She looked at Nathan whose eyes were closed and his breathing steadily. Scrunching her eyebrows in confusion she whispered his name to see if he was just faking sleeping. "Nathan, Nathan," She whispered. _I have to keep my breathing steady_ he told himself. Not getting an answer she listened to his even breathing and realized he was sleeping and she had just dreamt the whole thing up._

Why did I dream that though? Do I want to marry him? Do I love him? What's going on with me? If he asked me that would I marry him? I haven't known him that long, but he makes me feel a way that Josh never did. What the hell is wrong with me? How could I say yes to him and have known him a shorter time than when I found out the Josh was going to propose to me?_Haley thought exasperated her mind going a million miles a minute as she stayed up thinking why she conjured him asking to marry her in her head. __I have to talk to Peyton,__ she decided._

_Slowly slipping off Nathan and the couch she silently made her way to her room and threw on a pair of sweatpants, a tank top, and throwing her hair in a ponytail and tip toeing down the stairs, she slipped her feet into her favorite pair of flip flops by the door and quietly closing the door behind her so she didn't wake Nathan up._

_Nathan felt Haley crawl over him and the slight creaking of the stairs, before he heard the soft shuffle of her flip-flops before the door clicked close. Opening his eyes he wondered where she was going and what had just happened._

_He let out a deep sigh before turning to the back of the couch and trying to fall asleep praying that Haley believed he was asleep so she wouldn't ask him about it later on._

_End Flashback_

"GET YOUR FUCKING GRIMY HANDS OFF HER!" John screamed taking off the safety of the gun and pointing it at Nathan and Haley.

_**I hate you**_

_Please don't kill Nathan_ Haley prayed knowing that if anything happened to Nathan she wouldn't be able to live with herself. This was why she had broken up with him so he wouldn't get hurt. She loved him and needed him to be safe. She didn't care if anything happened to her but nothing could happen to Nathan or she would lose her heart. Unlike when Josh died, she didn't think she could survive without being with Nathan. This past week had been killing her. _I can't let Nathan die because of me. I can't let him end up like Josh,_ Haley thought before remembering the dream she had a few nights ago that had foreshadowed this event.

_Flashback:_

_Josh looked at her like she was crazy. "He loves you honey bee, so much and you two need to face this psycho together or neither of you will survive."_

_"What are you talking about?" Haley asked her body trembling with fear._

_"Be strong, confide in Nathan and you will be okay. Tell him you love him and please make sure he never takes you for granted because you are amazing." Josh told her standing up._

_"Wait," Haley said frantically scrambling to get out of the bed and standing without falling. "What do you mean survive?" She asked her brain just now processing what he had said._

_"To live honey bee. Be safe I will make sure to keep an eye on you." Josh looked at her once more before whispering goodbye and vanishing into thin air, Haley closed her eyes, smelling his aftershave in the room._

_End Flashback_

_We need to fight him off together but how?_ Haley thought, wracking her brain to come up with an idea. A way to get them out of this situation.

John stepped towards the couple and yanked Haley's arm before pointing the gun at her head. This was the only way he was going to get what he wanted. "I am going to make Haley mine and you are going to watch," John told the raven-haired man grinning as he imagined the agony on Nathan's face as he watched John enter Haley, before pulling Haley across the room and onto the back table, the gun in his other hand as he started unbuttoning Haley's white blouse.

_White, my beautiful innocent angel that will soon be mine and all this will be worth it_ John thought excitedly feeling the rush of power of the situation consuming him as he moved his hands to palm Haley's breasts his eyes rolling into the back of his head at the feeling of Haley's body. _There is nothing that punk can do. I have all the control. She will be mine_ he added using the hand that was holding the gun to move up Haley's skirt.

_**I see hell in your eyes  
Taken in by surprise  
Touching you makes me feel alive  
Touching you makes me die inside**_

Haley let the tears stream her face as she prayed for a miracle to happen. She knew Nathan couldn't save her or he would be shot. _He's going to rape me _she thought her body convulsing with fear and terror. The tears rapidly streaming down her face._ Please save me Nathan _she thought desperately, trying to figure out how to get the gun so Nathan could take him out. Her thoughts were running wildly in her head as she remembered this was one of her worst fears coming to life. She had been scared of being raped ever since she was a teenager and watched all the Law and Order SVU episodes and all the lifetime movies about being raped.

_The hell he will make Haley his_ Nathan thought, grasping the desks around him and using them to push himself off the floor. The adrenaline rushing through his veins as he forgot the pain in his lower back and ran across the room pushing John up against the wall.

Not expecting the attack when he was pushing Haley's skirt up John tripped and was against the wall. Gripping the gun tighter he moved his hand up pressing the gun into Nathan's chest, his eyes black with fury. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?" John asked his voice strained as Nathan was breathing heavily. He had forgotten to take his HCM medicine before seeing Haley today and now his heart was under stress seeing his Haley in danger.

_**I've slept so long without you  
It's tearing me apart too  
How'd it get this far  
Playing games with this old heart  
I've killed a million petty souls  
But I couldn't kill you**_

Nathan clutched the wrist that was holding the gun and using all his strength tried twisting John's wrist. John threw a punch and hitting Nathan. Nathan wiped the blood pouring off his face and Nathan falling back a step at the force he ran into John using the force of his shoulder to knock into John's stomach and making him fall to the floor. Crouching down Nathan tried grabbing the gun, but John was too fast. The two men threw punches and kicks, as they were both on the floor fighting. Haley got up off the table and tried to join the fight to get the gun out of John's hand. All three writhing and moving on the floor until a shot rang out and Haley felt a slick, sticky substance on her hand before holding it up and seeing the blood on her fingers. John jumped up to his feet and towering over the two a twisted sick smile on his face.

_**I've slept so long without you  
I see hell in your eyes  
Taken in by surprise  
Touching you makes me feel alive  
Touching you made me die inside**_.


	23. My Last Breath

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone sorry it took so long to get you up this chapter I was originally going to try and post it about 2 weeks ago, but then it was my birthday and my new niece was born and then my best friend came and spent the weekend along with a tiny bout of writer's block, but here is the newest update. I can't believe I am on chapter 23 (my favorite number) :o) and have almost 300 reviews and I just want to say thank you because they mean so much! Thank you to RICE, xjackullin, naley19, LIZ457, gg-ghgrl775, naleylovex3, steffy2106 and CherryCrush23 for reviewing the last chapter even though fanfiction was having issues letting people review. **

**A huge THANKS goes out to my beta Allie for correcting this in like 1 day with all her classes she has going on and helping me find the perfect song and to Steph for reminding me it had been a really long time since I had updated. I promise it wont take me over a month to update this again. To end my rant I hope you all enjoy and please review so I have mail when I get back from Chaucer. :o)**

**Song**: My Last Breath- Evanescence

**Quote:** "If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart... I'll always be with you." -Winnie the Pooh

* * *

Peyton was sitting in her house drawing a picture as music played in the background. Letting the music wash over her she felt the stress from the week leave her as her pencil hit the sketch paper and she let the guilt and remorse out. She stopped sketching and looked at the drawing as she tried to think of what words to write over it. In the picture was a wavy blonde hair girl, her eyes full of sorrow and on the right side stood a dark, bald headed man and on the other stood a bubbly brunette. Taking a deep breath she picked up her pencil and wrote _I'm sorry. It's up to you now._ Sitting on the couch she rested her hand on her head and closed her eyes the lyrics speaking to her and lull her into a blissful moment, until the phone rang, knocking her back to reality. Glancing at the clock she noticed it was only 4:30 and picked up the phone wondering who it was.

"Hello" She answered the phone moving her sketchbook to the table and focused her attention back on the phone.

"Hello may I please speak to a Miss Peyton Sawyer please," the feminine voice asked.

"This is her," Peyton told the lady her eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"This is Melinda from Tree Hill Memorial I just wanted to let you know that we ran your blood tests and we would like you to come in and discuss the results.

Peyton felt her hands begin to shake as her mind raced as all the things that could be wrong. _Do I have cancer?_ She asked herself knowing she had a family history of woman having cancer.

"Is something wrong?" Peyton asked uncertainly.

"Miss. Sawyer if you could please just come in then everything will be explained to you." Melinda told her.

"Okay, do you have time for me right now to come in?" Peyton asked wanting to find out what was wrong with her.

"We have an available appointment in a half hour since one of our other patients had to reschedule. How does that sound to you?" Melinda asked.

"Perfect" Peyton told her. "See you then. Bye"

"Good-bye Miss. Sawyer" Melinda said.

Hanging up the phone Peyton unsteadily got to her feet and walked up the stairs to take a shower and get dressed for the appointment. Quickly grabbing her cell phone she texted Haley letting her know that she was going to be late meeting her for the game and she would meet her there before grabbing her shoes and purse and walking out the door to the unknown. The unknown as to the doctor telling her she was sick, or telling her she had cancer or even something else that she didn't know yet.

---

Earlier, when Brooke had gone to the hospital to visit Derek, the nurse had informed the two that Derek could leave the hospital and Brooke told Derek he could stay with her. After leaving a voice mail on Peyton's phone the duo had made their way to Brooke's car and arrived at her house where they ordered a pizza. Brooke had Derek go to her room and lay on the bed while she waited for the mushroom and sausage pizza to be delivered. Now the two were lying on Brooke's bed the pizza in the middle of them and watching Ferris Bueller's Day Off, an old classic that the both had loved when they were younger. They had just been spending time together and Brooke looked at Derek and felt the guilt rising in her stomach. Although nothing had happened with Owen she felt compelled to tell Derek about that night.

"I have to tell you something," Brooke said turning in bed and looking at the dark skinned man lying next to her.

"What?" Derek asked sitting up a little in the bed and trying to analyze the anxious look on Brooke's face and what she had to tell him. _Is she pregnant? Is she sick? What's wrong with her? _He wondered.

_Just like a band-aid just rip it off or well in this case just blurt it out _Brooke thought. "The night we fought I went out and hung out with a guy who liked me," Brooke revealed.

"What?" Derek asked furrowing his eyebrows. "Did anything happen?" He asked masking his face neutral and disguising his voice so he didn't appear to be vulnerable. _I can't let her see me weak_, he told himself bracing his heart for her answer.

"No…nothing happened" Brooke assured him turning her whole body to face him. "I love you. I was just angry and hurt about our fight and I went to Tric and I was drinking and Owen, this guy who likes me asked me to hang out with him for the night and it was a choice of wallowing in self pity or go out and try to forget about our fight. I decided to go out and we went to a playground and just played and I felt like a kid again light and carefree and he tried kissing me but I turned my face so he caught my cheek. Then he stayed the night but he slept on the couch and the next morning we had a water fight and he had his shirt off cause his shirt was soaked and he was just leaving and I swear nothing happened but…I thought you should know" Brooke told him playing with the blanket that was covering their lower bodies.

"Nothing happened?" Derek repeated letting out a breath.

"Nothing happened" Brooke told him honestly staring into his eyes. "I love you."

Derek looked at her and let his hand cup her cheek as she tilted her face into it more. "I love you." He told her honestly letting a smile play on his face before bringing her face to his and gently kissing her.

Brooke quickly kissed him back her tongue running along the seam of his lips as he opened his mouth to her and the two let their tongues dance together.

---

Lucas walked into the locker room as all the players were suiting up. Walking to the Coach's office, he squinted looking for Nathan. Skills walked into the locker and noticed Lucas.

"Hey you better get this team out there," Skills told him.

"Hey have you see Nathan?" Lucas asked.

"Nah dawg ain't he in his office?" Skills questioned.

"No." Lucas told him.

"Dunno then dawg, but we got to get the team out there warming up and then I will look for him." Skills told the blonde.

"Okay let's do this then," Lucas said walking to the front of the locker room and clearing his voice trying to get everyone's attention.

"All right, let's go. Listen up. This is your chance at the honor and fame with winning a state championship. Tree Hill hasn't won many of these, but I know you guys can do this. Now lets go out there and show Bear Creek that we are the best." Lucas yelled putting his hand in the small circle that had formed around him. The players all put their hands in.

"1,2,3 Ravens!" Lucas chanted as they all threw their hands up. "Now let's go win this games" Lucas added and the players followed Lucas and Skills out of the locker room and into the gym.

"Okay, go warm up," Lucas yelled to the team before sitting down on a chair and double-checking the playbook.

"I'll go look for Nate dawg," Skills said walking about.

"Lucas!" Lindsey yelled running down to the court tears in her eyes and streaming down her cheek.

"What's wrong?" Lucas asked worried as he brushed away a tear.

"I'm sorry." Lindsey told him, "the doctor called I'm not pregnant. The test was false."

_She's not pregnant_ Lucas thought happily before he horrible realizing his girlfriend wasn't pregnant and he was happy. He could clearly see she was upset. "I guess it just wasn't the right time for us." He said trying to reassure her.

"I'm sorry" Lindsey told him.

"It's not your fault. Maybe when we've been dating awhile longer or we're married we can have a baby," he told her pulling her into his arms.

Lindsey wrapped her arms around him and smiled softly into his chest. _He wants to marry me_ she thought happily snuggling into him as people walked into the gym and tried to find seats for the game.

_Why did I give her false hope?_ Lucas asked himself as he held Lindsey, his self-conscious' voice kicking in. _You gave her hope because you know she wont hurt you like Peyton and because your scared of Peyton rejecting you. Quit leading Lindsey on she deserves to know that your not in this for the long haul and that before you found out she was pregnant you were going to break up with her._

---

Peyton sat on a hard plastic chair waiting for the doctor to come out and get her. To say she was anxious was an understatement. Her hands shook as her mind traveled a hundred miles a minute wondering what was wrong with her. The main worry she had was whether she had cancer, after all this was why she had check ups every 6 months to make sure she was okay and didn't have cancer.

"Ms. Sawyer the doctor is ready to see you if you could please follow me" an older nurse with dark brown hair in her 40's requested.

Peyton got up from the chair and shakily followed the nurse into a doctor's office.

"Now, just sit in there and Dr. Copeland will be with you soon," the nurse told her opening the door for Peyton before walking away.

Peyton made her way to a chair in front of the desk. Her hands fiddling together as she tapped her foot and waited for the doctor. Her nerves were on end as she heard the traffic from the hallway filter into the office and she kept looking behind her shoulder anxious of what the doctor was going to tell her.

"Hello Ms. Sawyer?" A man in his early 30's, with brown hair asked wearing a white lab coat and walking into the room.

"Hi," Peyton responded automatically looking up at him.

"So, I bet you are nervous as to why I had you called in correct?" He asked sitting down on the other side of the desk and picking up a folder, which she guessed was hers.

"Yes, especially since you're not my normal doctor." Peyton told him honestly trying not to offend the man but needing to know what was going on.

"My name is Dr. Ethan Copeland and I am a OBGYN doctor here at Tree Hill General Hospital."

"So why am I here?" Peyton asked confused.

"Miss Sawyer" Ethan started to say before Peyton interrupted him.

"Please call me Peyton," she told him.

"Peyton, when we were looking over your blood tests we noticed something different in your blood work and upon further investigation noticed that you are pregnant.

"Preg…pregnant?" Peyton asked dumbfounded.

"Yes, it seems to me that you are about 14 days pregnant," Ethan told the stunned blonde. "Now we would like to start you on prenatal vitamins and I would like you to schedule a time to meet with me in about a month to check on the progress of your fetus.

Peyton just nodded her head as she tried to wrap her head around the news. She was pregnant. She was going to have a baby. Looking up her eyes began to well as she smiled at the doctor, thanking him before reaching out and taking the medical slip for vitamins and walking to the nurse's station to set up an appointment her head filled with disbelief and shock.

_I have to go talk to Haley,_ she thought walking to her car and making her way to Tree Hill High School.

Getting out of her comet she ran into the gym and searched the stands for Haley, needing her best friend more than before. She was going to have a baby and this time she would tell her best friend about it. She couldn't tell the father. No, that night was supposed to only be one night. It wasn't supposed to result in a pregnancy. He was happy with someone else. _Oh god what am I going to do, _she thought walking the halls to Haley's classroom to see if she was still grading papers and waiting for Peyton in her room.

Finally reaching the door she went to turn the handle and noticed it was locked. Haley probably didn't want to be disturbed she thought pulling out her keys and inserting the silver key into the door and turning it before walking into the room her eyes trained on the floor as she blurted out her secret. "Hales I'm pregnant" she said finally looking up when Haley hadn't said anything and felt herself grip the desk on her side as she noticed her best friend holding up a bloody hand, Nathan on the ground and John…her ex boyfriend's brother, holding a gun and giving her a murderous look.

"I'm…I'm gonna go" Peyton stuttered out trying to make it to the door until the safety flipped off the gun and she looked up to see it was pointed at her.

"Don't want to lose another baby do you Peyton?" He taunted a devilish grin on his face.

Peyton wrapped her arms around her stomach trying to protect the baby that she hadn't even known was there until an hour ago. "No," she whispered weakly her eyes searching Haley's body to see where the blood was coming from before she noticed her brunette friend drop to her knees and hold Nathan's face in her hands.

"It's going to be okay baby," she whispered into Nathan's ear placing her hand on Nathan's stomach and applying pressure to the gun wound.

His ragged breathing filling the silence in the room.

_**Hold on to me, love  
You know I can't stay long  
All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid  
Oh...  
Can you hear me?  
Can you feel me in your arms?  
**_

Peyton stood there in horror as she noticed the look of disgust on John's face and grabbed her wrist pulling her away from Nathan's body. Moving around so his back faced Peyton to place Haley on the table and continue to where he was before Nathan had stopped him. Haley wriggling underneath him as she tried to kick him, anything to get him off her. Noticing John's back Peyton quickly grabbed her cell out of her jean pocket and texted the first person she could.

"Haley class John gun Nate shot call 911"

Before sliding it back in her pocket and marching to the other side of the classroom. _Please let my baby and me survive this,_ she prayed before grabbing John's arm and stopping him.

_**Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet raptured light  
It ends here tonight  
**_

"Leave her alone!" She yelled bringing her knee up to kick him in his crotch with all the force she could achieve and watched as he stumbled back in pain. Seeing red with rage he grabbed hold of the blonde curls that had moved to help Haley try and get to Nathan and yanked them to bring her to the table. "You just couldn't stay away. I'll have you after I'm through with her." John seethed, throwing Peyton on the floor before reaching for Haley who was holding on to Nathan this time for dear life. His breathing becoming slower as his eyes started to fall shut. "Please Nathan stay with me…" Haley begged taking off Nathan's shirt and rolling it up to press against his bullet wound.

---

Skills was checking the guys bathroom when his phone beeped indicating he had a new text message, figuring it was Nathan he flipped it open surprised when Peyton's name popped up. Going to hit ignore, something didn't feel right. She wouldn't text him after she told him she would wait for him to make up his mind. Hitting the read button he quickly dialed 911 and ran to Haley's room trying to explain what he knew about the situation and needing to make sure his three best friends were okay.

The operator told him to stay online as he peeked through the classroom window and told them what he saw. Two people laying on the floor and Haley crouched next to Nathan as John Jagelski had a gun pointing at the blonde who had sent him the text message. He told the operator he was going to go in the classroom to which she quickly told him no and to stay where he was but he was going to go. He had to.

"I will put the cell phone on the desk so you can hear everything," He told her before taking a deep breath and walked into the classroom, knowing that even though the curly blonde had hurt him he still loved her and didn't want anything to happen to her. She was still his best friend.

_**I'll miss the winter  
A world of fragile things  
Look for me in the white forest hiding in a hollow tree  
(Come find me)  
I know you hear me  
I can taste it in your tears**_

"John dawg what's going on?" Skills asked standing in front of the desk trying to stay calm as Peyton looked up at Skills.

_What's he doing here?_ The blonde thought frantic that he ignored her message and didn't call the police. Her eyes begged for him to just turn around and leave.

"Well, well, looks like most of the gang is all here, except the newbie," John saying his gun still pointing at Peyton. _She's the weak one in the group _he told himself. He knew Skills wouldn't do anything to piss him off since the gun was pointed at the curly blonde. She was also Haley's best friend and one of the most important people in the world to her.

"John dawg don't shoot her" Skills said walking slowly towards John.

"You're right…we can both have what we want" John said a evil gleam in his eyes as he looked back and forth at the two girls before his gave once again settled on Skills.

"Whattya mean?" Skills asked confused.

"I know you have always wanted Peyton and she has always denied you. I mean she screwed the brains of out my brother and I know you have always wanted a piece of her. You can enjoy her now while I get my Haley" John told him. _That way the stupid blonde bitch can get what's coming to her and I can have my Haley. And Skills…Skills who has always loved Peyton like I have always loved Haley can have her _he thought a sickening smile coming onto his face, as the perfect plan seemed to come together.

_If I pretend to go along with his plan I can make sure nothing happens to either of the girls before the police get here_ Skills thought deciding that he would do anything to protect those two.

"Sounds good," Skills said walking toward him trying to keep his face blank as he wondered how long until the police would arrive and if he could stop John from doing anymore damage then one of his best friends lying on the floor bleeding.

"Dawg why don't you give me the gun while you get with Haley," Skills said standing in front of John with his hand outstretched.

"Why would I do something like that?" John asked squinting at Skills as if he was measuring him up.

"Dawg than you could have both hands free. You can trust me…I have wanted Peyton as long as you have Haley and your helping me out so let me help you out." Skill told him.

_Well, I have known Skills most of my life and this way I don't have to worry about trying to hold the gun and having Haley. Plus I can use both hands to run all over his body_ John thought as a sickening smile crept on his face and he leered at Haley before turning towards Skills.

Skills waited with bated breath hoping that John would give him the gun.

"Okay," John said starting to hand the gun over to Skills, before a flash flew past the window and he turned around the gun still in his possession as he made his way to the window.

As his back was turned the policeman who had looked into the room saw the man's back to the door and the cop opened the door followed by more officers and all had their guns raised a few in front kneeling on the ground.

"This is the Tree Hill police put your hands up where we can see them and turn around," a blonde haired officer called out.

_Oh shit,_ John thought doing as the officer told him to as he desperately tried to think of a plan to get out of the room or the situation he was in. Looking around he noticed Haley had crouched back down next to Nathan still pressing it into the bullet wound. He looked in disgust as she was trying to save her hero from dying. He looked around the room to see where Peyton was; _she would make a good shield, _he thought. _The bitch could take a bullet for me if she needed to. _He debated if he could make it to Peyton with the police standing in front of him their guns pointed towards him as Peyton laid a few feet away from him trying to slowly move towards her he heard the police shout at him to stay where he was, but he didn't care. He had nothing left to lose at this point. He was one step away when a shot was fire and hit him in the shoulder making him round towards the police, the adrenaline coursing through his veins as he walked the rest of the way to Peyton and using all the strength he had throw her across the room, before grinning evilly and running to the officer who shot him and tried attacking him the other officers pinned him down and read him his rights as they arrested him.

Haley was only staring at Nathan as she pressed his bloody shirt down, the tears coursing her eyes as his breathing started to get shallow. His eyelids fluttered open as he saw his angel kneeling over him. "Hales," he weakly croaked getting her attention as she cupped his face and softly told him everything was going to be okay.

"I love you," he whispered his eyes falling shut as his breathing became non-existent.

_**Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet raptured light  
It ends here tonight  
**_

"Nathan…. NATHAN" Haley yelled trying to get him to wake up or something. "Somebody help me she screamed as the paramedics ran into the room after getting the all clear and heading towards the two bodies on the floor they divided up.

_**Closing your eyes to disappear  
You pray your dreams will leave you here  
But still you wake and know the truth  
No one's there**_

Haley and Skills wrapped into each others embraces as they waited to see if the curly blonde was still alive with the blood pooled on the floor by her head and hearing the paramedics talk about a blunt head trauma as the other team tried to resuscitate Nathan.

_**Say goodnight  
Don't be afraid  
Calling me, calling me as you fade to black**_

_**(Say goodnight...)  
Holding my last breath  
(Don't be afraid...)  
Safe inside myself  
(Calling me, calling me)  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet raptured life  
It ends here tonight  
**_


	24. One Day

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone sorry for not updating sooner but 12 papers in two weeks while trying to write a chapter is hard and papers come first especially when you don't have a computer!! And now I am working on finals, but I will be done May 6th. Btw my computer HATES me!!! Anywho this story is almost over! One chapter and an epilogue. I am planning to have this done by the end of May. I guess there's not much to say except BIG thanks to Allie for beta'ing and for Hayley and Steph to tell me if parts were okay, and everyone who reviewed the last chapter, your comments and thoughts inspire me to write. Oh and the movie i mention is City of Angels and its an AMAZING movie!! I decided to update today because today is my first day of finals and i want reviews when i come back ;o). Good luck to everyone else who has finals right now and take a break and enjoy this chapter.**

**Song:** One Day (MTT Version) - Trading Yesterday

**Quote:** For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these, It might have been.  
_John Greenleaf Whittier_

* * *

Haley shuffled her feet back and forth in the small waiting room as she wrung her hands nervously together. The disinfectant smell of the hospital filled her nostrils as she tried to comprehend what had happened in the past 4 hours. It was a flash of series of what happened once the paramedics had arrived and started working on Nathan and Peyton.

After they had loaded Peyton and Nathan on stretchers the paramedics had wheeled them out to the ambulances and Haley and Skills each went in separate ones, Haley with Nathan while Skills rode with Peyton knowing that Haley needed to be by Nathan. As soon as they reached the Emergency room they took Nathan immediately to surgery, and then wheeled Peyton somewhere Haley didn't know, while taking Haley and Skills to separate rooms and checking over their vitals and making sure they were okay.

The crimson blood that had stained her hands and shirt had disappeared now after the nurse had made her wash her hands and Brooke had brought her a fresh change of clothes. She was wearing a black tank top with a pair of jeans as she stopped so she could wipe her clammy palms against her legs. She closed her eyes trying to erase the images of her strong Nathan lying on her classroom floor bleeding to death. She couldn't lose him. Losing Josh had been bad enough but she knew that if she ever lost Nathan she would never be able to recover from it.

_**If I could change the currents of our lives  
To make the river flow where it's run dry  
To be a prodigal of father time  
Then I would see you tonight**_

Her mind then wandered to Peyton, her best friend. _I hope she's okay…she has to be okay _she thought nervously as she continued to pace until, this time, she ran into a hard body that held her by the shoulders stopping her as she looked up into the eyes, hers in a dazed expression until she could see the fear and sadness reflected in the man's who was holding her. Throwing her arms around the chocolate skinned man she let the tears she had been holding in for the past hour fall from her eyes as he held back and let her cry into his shoulder leading her to the small couch in the waiting room and rubbed her back trying to soothe her as he felt his own tears prickle in his eyes. She cried for the love of her life and her best friend. She cried for the past and losing Josh to his brother. She cried for the unknown. The tears fell harder as she thought about the movie she had just watched last night and how the man had finally fallen in love until the love of his life was taken away but she remembered the part where he asked why do people cry.

_**Seth**__: Why do people cry?  
__**Maggie**__: What do you mean?  
__**Seth**__: I mean, what happens physically?  
__**Maggie**__: Well... umm... tear ducts operate on a normal basis to lubricate and protect the eye and when you have an emotion they overact and create tears.  
__**Seth**__: Why? Why do they overact?  
__**Maggie**__: [pause] I don't know.  
__**Seth**__: Maybe... maybe emotion becomes so intense your body just can't contain it. Your mind and your feelings become too powerful, and your body weeps._

She felt the emotions that had been so intense, the love she had for Peyton, her best friend, the one who had been through everything through thick and thin and hoping she was okay. But then her heart clenched tightly in her chest when she thought about the love she felt for Nathan and knowing she had never responded. She had never told him she loved him and she was sorry. Her heart clenched in her chest as her mind drifted to what it would be like to live without Nathan. She couldn't even picture it at all. She didn't know how after knowing Nathan, loving Nathan she would be able to survive without him.

"Excuse me is there a Ms. Haley James in here?" An older bald man asked wearing scrubs with a stethoscope hanging around his neck as he looked around the room.

Skills nudged her as her eyes quickly shot up to see what was going on before he pointed to the doctor. Slowly she got to her feet and made her way to the Doctor.

"Ms. James, my name is Doctor Smith and I was working on Peyton when she was brought in. So far we have her in stable condition. We were able to stop the bleeding, but unfortunately the blunt trauma to the head has lead to her being in a state of comatose and we do not how long it will be until she wakes up.

Haley nodded not knowing what else to do. Her best friend was in a coma, the one that had been there for her no matter what. Suddenly she flashed back to the classroom when Peyton burst in.

"_Hales I'm pregnant," her nervous and excited voice broke out as the color dropped off her face when she saw what was happening."_

_Baby…what about Peyton's baby? _Haley wondered before looking at the doctor confused. "She was pregnant. How's the baby? Haley asked looking up at the doctor worriedly.

Nurse Hathaway informed us of the baby and right now it's in critical condition but we cannot do an ultrasound until Miss. Sawyer wakes up. As of right now we have her hooked up to machines and if anything happens with the baby, it will let us know.

"Okay," Haley nodded not knowing what else to say as the doctor left and Skills stepped up to her before wrapping her in his arms again.

"Peyton's pregnant?" He asked looking at Haley in confusion.

"Yeah," Haley said before looking up at Skills. "I just found out today, that's why she came to see me.

Skills just stood there silently holding her as his mind just kept repeating Peyton's pregnant. He couldn't believe it. Peyton was going to be a mom.

Haley's thoughts drifted from the baby to Nathan. They still hadn't heard any news about how the surgery was going. She remembered the way her heart tightened as she told him lie after lie about why they needed to break up. Now here he was lying on an operating machine fighting for her life because of her. She suddenly felt suffocated, she needed to leave, and pushing out of the arms of Skills she looked at him before getting up and running. She ran out of the hospital not looking back and continued. Her mind was blank as she felt the wind mix with the tears on her cheeks as a few fell into her mouth and she tasted the saltiness of her tears not bothering to wipe them away. She didn't know where she was running she just kept remembering Nathan the way his lips felt against hers, his hand on her waist as he held her sending tiny tingles through her body, his stupid smirk that she loved to kiss off his face, the way he looked at her like she was the only one in the room even if they were in a crowded room, his smile when she would do something silly, the way he touched her as they made love, she stopped her heart beating rapidly in her chest as she dropped to her knees trying to catch her breath. Looking up she realized what neighborhood she was in and made her way to Nathan's apartment. She wanted to be lost. Reaching for his spare key hidden under the fire extinguisher, she opened the door and walked in before closing and locking the door behind her. Slipping off her flip flops she walked straight to the back where Nathan's bed was and crawled into it needing to be close to him, even if it was just his scent.

_**If I could find the years that went away  
Destroying all the cruelty of fate  
I must believe that love could find a way  
Tonight**_

He was gone… He had been her soul mate and just like the other man she had only ever loved was taken away from her. The tears ran silently down her face, as her heart felt like it was going to explode inside her chest. The room was pitch black as she lay curled into a ball on the bed where her boyfriend used to sleep. His scent filling her nostrils as the tears continued to stream down her face, making no move to wipe them away since she knew it would be pointless, until he could hold her and whisper in her ear that everything would be okay. Getting up she walked to his closet and pulled out a baby blue t-shirt he wore all the time and slipped the shirt over her head, walking back to the bed and curling in the fetal position again. She fiddled with his chain that he had been wearing earlier that she took off him before the paramedics had taken him to surgery, silently pleading with them to let her take it. She knew none of her friends would think to check Nathan's house for her.

---

Skills walked out of the waiting room he bumped into Nathan's mom.

"Skills how is he?" Deb asked frantically worried about her son.

"He's in surgery right now. We don't know anything yet. Plus since none of his family members were here…" Skills told her before his thoughts ran to Lucas and how he should call the blonde man and tell him his brother and Peyton were in the hospital. He didn't know whether anyone had told him.

"I should call Lucas," Deb said frantically searching through her purse trying to find her cell phone.

"I'll do it," Skills told her placing his hand on her arm and still her movements as she looked at him.

"Thank you," she whispered softly continuing her way to the nurses' station to see if there was any news on her son.

Skills made his way outside where he could use his cell phone and dialed Lucas number. Hopefully he answers he thought checking his watch and seeing that the game should be over by now.

Lucas was sitting in his office trying to rack his brain of where his brother and other assistant coach were. He knew Nathan was going to be upset missing the game. They had won the Championship and his brother who had been with the team the whole way had missed it. It must've been something really important, he thought himself before he let his mind wander back to watching the final shot being made leading the Ravens to victory and Lindsey running down the bleachers to greet him as his team hooped and hollered about winning he couldn't help wishing that instead of Lindsey running to meet him it would've been Peyton. His phone lying on the table jolted him back to reality as it rang, glancing down at it he saw it was Skills and quickly answered it.

"Hey, did you find Nathan? What made you miss the game?" Lucas fired into the phone needing to know where the two had been.

"Yeah, I found Nathan, with Haley and Peyton." Skills answered vaguely not sure about how to break the news to the blonde boy.

"Well where the hell were you guys?" Lucas asked raising his voice as his anger continued to grow. _Why the fuck were they off with Haley and Peyton when they were supposed to be helping me win a damn championship game,_ he thought.

"In Haley's classroom. Look can you come to the hospital?" Skills asked running a hand over his bald head not wanting to explain the situation over the phone.

"Why? What happened?" Lucas asked still pissed off. _What the hell is going on,_ he thought.

"It's Peyton," Skills told him.

_**Lonely finds me  
One day you will come  
But I'll wait for love's sake  
One day to me, love**_

"I'll be right there," Lucas said, the anger completely gone as he grabbed his keys off the desk and ran to his car, his heart aching knowing that his Peyton was in the hospital as his mind tried to understand what had happened. Car accident? He wondered. _Did she run a red light? No, she promised she wouldn't do that anymore. Did she cut her finger? What happened? _His brain tried to come up with excuses as to why she could be at the hospital. He couldn't get to the hospital fast enough he had probably broken a million traffic laws, but he didn't care he needed to know that Peyton was okay.

---

Brooke and Derek were sitting in the waiting room both lost in their own thoughts as to how a perfect day of watching old movies in bed had come to this, sitting in the hospital room and waiting for Peyton to come out of a coma and for Nathan to come out of surgery.

_I can't believe I just get out of the hospital and then some sick freak tries to attack Haley and Peyton gets involved in it. That asshole better be going to jail for a long time,_ Derek thought rage consuming his mind as he thought about how he could make sure that the man who put his baby sister in the hospital and possibly break the other woman he considered a sister in prison for life.

Brooke felt the tears well in the back of her eyes as she thought about how Derek just got out of the hospital and now his baby sister was in here. _It's not fair,_ she thought angrily. _It's not fair that Nathan is in surgery and Peyton is in a coma and Haley is no where to be found and Lucas is God knows where with the wrong woman. What happens if Peyton never wakes up? What happens if Peyton and Lucas never get together even though their meant to be?_

Skills walked back into the waiting room and slumped on a hard chair across from Brooke and Derek as they awaited news on either the curly blonde or the brunette, neither knowing whether they should leave Haley alone or go look for her.

---

**Peyton stood in an old park she remembered from her childhood. The soft luscious green grass tickled her toes as felt a small gust of wind blew through her blonde locks and looking around she saw an old oak tree she used to climb as a child. Walking over to it she let her hand run over the rough bark trying to think she was here.**

"**I remember one time you climbed that tree and wouldn't come down for hours." A female voice spoke breaking the silence, Peyton whipped her head around to see who it was, the words catching in her throat at seeing the two women standing in front of her.**

"**Mom," her whispered voice floated out.**

"**Hi sweetie," the darker blonde woman spoke out a sad smile on her face as she stared at the young woman in front of her.**

"**Hi Peyton," the other blonde woman with short straight hair said as the duo moved in front of the shocked girl.**

"**What are you doing here? Am I dead?" Peyton asked looking around the park confused, before noticing Anna had a small bundle wrapped in a pink blanket. It was a baby, a delicate, podgy, beautiful baby. Her baby. "Is that…" Peyton trailed off choking on her words as the tears sprang to her eyes when she stepped closer. **

"**Yea," Ellie said looking at the young girl in Anna's arms a smile coming to her face. "This is your daughter Peyton."**

"**She's beautiful" Peyton said her fingers itching to trace over the porcelain features, commit each and everyone to memory. From the button nose to the tuff of soft blonde curls. "And now you have another one growing inside you." Anna said her eyes twinkling in happiness as Peyton looked down at her stomach, remembering what had happened in the classroom and rubbed a hand over her flat stomach. **_**If it's still there**__**,**_** she thought sadly.**

"**The baby's okay," Ellie confirmed noticing the faraway glance that Peyton had as she rubbed her belly.**

**Peyton's eyes shot up searching for confirmation that she just heard was true. **

**Seeing Ellie nod made Peyton's heart soar. She didn't lose another child, and she let out a deep sigh of relief.**

"**Can I hold her?" Peyton questioned softly pointing to Anna Elizabeth Jagielski as Anna nodded and handed the little bundle over.**

"**She's so beautiful" Peyton whispered cradling the infant in her arms as she made her way to the swing set and sat down on a swing, cradling the infant protectively in her arms.**

"**She reminds me of you when you were a baby," Anna told Peyton standing next to the swing that Peyton was occupying.**

"**Yea?" Peyton asked looking up at her mom.**

"**Yes," Anna told her.**

"**So now what's going on with you running away from all these guys?" Ellie asked.**

**Peyton looked up and opened her mouth to speak before quickly shutting it closed again.**

"**I once told you don't be afraid Peyton. Every song has a coda, a final movement, whether it fades out or crashes away. Every song ends, is that any reason not to enjoy the music?" Ellie reminded her.**

"**I am just so tired of being hurt and losing everyone I love," Peyton confided.**

"**I know you are sweetie," Anna told her, "but you can't let your fears stop you. If I did I would have never met your father."**

"**And if you keep this up hiding in your art and your sadness, you're really gonna miss out. Because the truth is, there is nothing to be afraid of. It's just life." Ellie added as Peyton nodded listening to the words her moms spoke.**

**Another gust of wind blew through the park as Anna and Ellie looked at each other. "It's time," Anna whispered.**

**Peyton looked up and took a breath. She just wanted to stay with her moms and her daughter.**

"**I don't want you to go," Peyton told them brokenheartedly.**

"**You have a choice," Ellie told her glancing at Anna before continuing. "You can stay here with us or you can go back and tell Lucas how you really feel and raise the child in your womb. It's your choice."**

**Peyton felt her heart rip in her chest. **_**How am I supposed to choose between my two kids,**_** she questioned herself. "I think I have to go back, I don't think I could never see what happens with Lucas and with this baby, I cant not have it because I'm scared, but I don't wanna leave Anna," She cried looking down at the innocent little girl in her arms.**

"**We'll take good care of her," Anna and Ellie promised.**

"**I love you, my beautiful little girl and I will never forget you. I promise" Peyton whispered into the child's ears. "Take care of her and always tell her I love her." Peyton asked her moms. **

"**We always do. We'll keep an eye on you too and whenever you need us we're there." Anna told her tucking a stray curl behind her daughter's ear before hugging her daughter.**

"**Everything will be okay," Ellie whispered hugging Peyton as she nodded before handing the baby to Anna.**

"**I love you," Peyton told them sucking in a deep breath before releasing it and watching the two women and baby walking away. The tears sliding down her face as she closed her eyes and felt her body leave the park.**

She felt a rough hand squeezing her hand and mustering all her strength she tried to squeeze it back before opening her eyes she saw the plain white walls and the needle poking into her skin before her eyes came into contact with a set of light blue eyes.

"Peyton," Lucas whispered out as she stared at him, a single tear rolling down her eyes as she moved the hand he wasn't holding onto her stomach.

_**If I could see beyond the here and now  
If you could hear me calling you somehow  
If I could know that love is reaching out  
To find you with me tonight  
**_

---

The pillow she had been lying on was wet with all her tears. She had been crying for hours but she couldn't stop it. This is all my fault Haley thought the tears continued to stream down her face, if I never would've moved here nothing ever would've happened to Peyton or Nathan. Nathan would be happy and so would Peyton. They wouldn't be lying in hospital beds fighting for their lives. She remembered the last time she saw Josh. He told her to tell Nathan.

_Josh walked toward her and sat on the bed. "I love you Haley, you know that but if you don't tell someone you might join me up there he told her pointing to the sky. "And you have so much potential left here on earth! I know you're scared that Nathan could get hurt but you and I both know you need him. Look at you. You're a mess," Josh told her._

**What would he think if he saw me now, she thought bitterly, that was nothing compared to what I am feeling now. I do need him, but it's my fault he's lying in a hospital bed in surgery fighting for his damn life. **

_"Be strong, confide in Nathan and you will be okay. Tell him you love him and please make sure he never takes you for granted because you are amazing." Josh told her standing up._

_"Wait," Haley said frantically scrambling to get out of the bed and standing without falling. "What do you mean survive?" She asked her brain just now processing what he had said._

_"To live honey bee. Be safe I will make sure to keep an eye on you." Josh looked at her once more before whispering goodbye and vanishing into thin air, Haley closed her eyes, smelling his aftershave in the room._

"_I might not have told him what happened but he still got hurt. I am not okay! Josh you did this," Haley screamed standing up from the bed. "This is all your fault JOSHUA EDWARD JAGIELSKI. I HATE YOU! YOU DID THIS! I WAS FINE AND YOU SAID IF I TOLD NATHAN WHAT WAS GOING ON I WOULD BE OKAY, BUT IM NOT AND NOW HE IS DYING! I HATE YOU! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT; YOU WERE SUPPOSEDTO PROTECT ME!_

"_I was protecting you," a voice whispered as Haley turned and looked at the man in front of her, daggers shooting from here eyes._

"_It's your fault. If you wouldn't have sent him to me then he would be fine. I hate you," Haley said her voice laced with anger and loathing._

"_No you don't," Josh told her adamantly. "You're upset and scared, but you don't hate me. You know this is no one's fault but John's."_

"_Why? Why did this happen?" Haley asked brokenly feeling her knees buckle as she sat back on the bed._

"_Because life is about challenges and showing how strong you are and that you won't get anything you can't handle. He'll be okay hunny bee, you just have to think he will be. He loves you and I will do whatever I can to make sure he comes back to you." Josh told her sitting next to her on the bed._

"_Promise?" Haley whispered her eyes red and puffy from hours of crying._

"_Yea." Josh told her knowing he would do whatever he could not to let Haley lose another person she loved. "I told you before I loved you and that won't change, but a part of me wishes I could have warned you better._

"_You will always be my first love," Haley told him honestly._

"_You need to go back to the hospital," Josh said. "Don't ever forget me hunny bee," he added before walking out the door and leaving her with her thoughts._

Haley closed her eyes before opening them again and took off Nathan's t-shirt before folding it and placing it back on the bed and walking out the door to go back to the hospital. She had to be there when he got out of surgery. He deserved that much.

_**Then hope could make these promises come true  
Beyond what I could say, what love can do  
With every moment leading me to you tonight**_

---

"Peyton," Lucas whispered out as she stared at him, a single tear rolling down her eyes as she moved the hand he wasn't holding onto her stomach.

"Water" Peyton croaked out after what seemed like hours of their staring contest.

Lucas quickly reached on the dresser and grabbed a cup of water before sticking a straw in it and holding it in front of the blonde to drink.

Taking a drink to coat her throat she moved her head back away and he put the glass on the table.

"How are you?" He questioned cupping her cheek lovingly.

"Okay," Peyton said staring confused at Lucas. _What is he doing here? Shouldn't he be with his girlfriend?_

"I should go get the doctor," Lucas said breaking the awkward silence and getting out of his chair and heading to the nurses station. A few minutes later the doctor from her appointment earlier walked in. Dr. Copeland had a clipboard in his hand as Lucas trailed behind him.

_**Lonely finds me  
One day you will come  
But I'll wait for love's sake  
One day to me, love**_

"Hi Dr. Copeland." Peyton greeted.

"Miss. Sawyer glad to see you're awake. Although I do not like the circumstances, normally I don't see patients twice in the same day.

"Yea…" Peyton said glancing down as her hand rested on her stomach. She looked down at it before catching the doctor's eyes and needing confirmation that her child was okay and she didn't come back for nothing.

"The baby is fine, as far as we know, but now that you are awake we would like to run some tests just to make sure," he told her as Lucas looked from Peyton to the doctor.

"You're pregnant?" He asked his eyes searching hers for answers. "Who's the father?"

_**I will stay forever here to wait for your love**_

---

"Okay, we just to stitch this up and then he should be fine," Dr. Smith said to his team as they operated on the young male brunette.

One of the other doctors started to sew the skin back together as Dr. Smith started washing his hands and the rest of the crew started cleaning up. It was in a split second that the heartbeat start started to drop dramatically and Dr. Smith ran back to the room getting the paddles ready as his heartbeat continued to drop. "Okay, I need you to charge me to 100," Dr. Smith yelled out. "Clear," he ordered as everyone stepped away and he shocked the young man lying on the table. Watching the monitor as it flat lined he called to charge it to 200.

_**If I could change the currents of our lives  
To make the river flow where it's run dry  
To be a prodigal of father time  
Then I would see you tonight**_

Nathan stood up as saw a bunch of doctors standing around a body until he looked by the door and saw a man with green eyes and brown hair watching him with his arms across his chest.

"Who are you?" Nathan questioned.

_**Lonely finds me  
One day you will come  
But I'll wait for love's sake  
One day to me, love**_

"Josh Jagielski," Josh told him as he looked at the doctors working on the body the beeping in the room still going off.

"Am I dead?" Nathan asked.

_**Lonely finds me  
One day you will come  
But I'll wait for love's sake  
One day to me, love  
One day to me, love  
One day to me, love**_


	25. Perfectly

**HJS-NS-23- Hey everyone here is the newest chapter. Originally this was going to be the last chapter before the epilogue, but when I started writing it, it became longer than normal and so I cut it in half and yeah you guys get two chapters instead lol. I hope to update the next one on Friday if I get enough reviews and then I still have to write the epilogue. HUGE thanks goes to Brittany for telling me if the smut in this chapter was okay and for Allie for beta'ing it and helping me find a song. I also want to thank Steph, Allie, Emma, Lisa and Maiike**** for helping me find a quote. Thank you to those who all read and reviewed the last chapter and to Becca, who doesn't have an account so I couldn't send you a reply. Enjoy and don't forget to leave your thoughts. :o)**

**Song:** Perfectly by Natalie Imbruglia

**Quote**: Passion doesn't look beyond the moment of its existence.  
--Christian Nevell Bovee

* * *

"_You're pregnant?" He asked his eyes searching hers for answers. "Who's the father?"_

Peyton felt her mouth open and close with no words escaping as she tried to figure out how to tell him.

"Whose the father of who?" Brooke asked walking in the room and going straight to the hospital bed before hugging her best friend.

"I'm pregnant," Peyton told her putting a hand on her still flat stomach. "Is it okay? Are you okay?" Brooke asked searching her friends' eyes for confirmation; her own eyes glittering with unshed tears.

"Hey why are you crying? I'm okay." Peyton said ignoring Lucas' question and focusing on her friend instead. "I'm okay," Peyton repeated trying to get to the brunette that was sitting at her side. "The baby is okay," Peyton said smiling and putting a hand on her still flat tummy.

"Are you sure?" Brooke asked placing her hand on Peyton's stomach.

"Yea. We're going to be okay. Right Doctor Copeland," Peyton said smiling.

"Well, Miss Sawyer, like I said before, the baby is fine, as far as we know, but now that you are awake we would like to run some tests just to make sure."

"My baby is a fighter. Everything will be okay," Peyton said smiling as she looked up at the ceiling, knowing her mothers and father were watching over her and the new life growing inside her.

"Okay, well, I am going to go get a nurse and have her set up a sonogram and make sure the baby is okay." Dr. Copeland said before exiting the room.

Lucas just stood and looked at Peyton, his eyes searching hers for the answer to his question.

_**When I say it doesn't matter  
It matters most of all  
You're not up for **__**conversation**__**  
So I'm blinded by it all**_

"I am so going to have to make the baby clothes. Do you know how far along are you? Do you know what the sex is? Who's the dad?" Brooke rushed out wanting to know all the details.

Peyton just sat there smiling at her friends' questions. She was not going to answer any of them until Lucas left.

Lucas looked between the blonde and the brunette waiting for an answer.

Brooke could see that Peyton wouldn't answer her questions with Lucas in the room. "Go away Broody," Brooke demanded.

"What why?" Lucas asked confused.

"Because I wanna know the dirt and she won't say anything with you in here so leave," Brooke said bluntly.

Lucas looked at Peyton the hurt shining in his eyes that he was not privy to the information she would share with Brooke before clearing his throat. "Yeah, I'm going to call Lindsey," he said before walking out the door.

_**The further away you push me  
The closer I feel to you**_

Lucas walked out of Peyton's room, his thoughts focused on only one thing: Peyton was pregnant. _It can't be mine can it?_ Lucas wondered. _We only had sex a little over two weeks ago, it can't be mine she wouldn't know she was pregnant yet. Don't you have to wait a month? Then whose is it?_ Lucas asked himself. He made his way to the waiting room where Deb and Skills were sitting. "Any news on Nathan yet?" Lucas asked.

"No not yet, he's still in surgery," Deb told him. "How's the other girl that was brought here?" Deb questioned.

"Peyton?" Lucas asked squinting his eyes in confusion.

"Yea," Deb said.

"She's okay," Lucas told her a small smile coming onto his face knowing most likely there was going to be no complications with the baby, even if he wasn't the father he still wanted Peyton to have a healthy baby and if she would let him he would be there for her and the baby.

"You love her, don't you?" Deb inquired.

Lucas looked up his eyes boring into hers as he wondered how she knew. "I'm with someone," Lucas told her, his hands clasped together and resting by his knees.

_**Every fall every **__**crash**__**  
Everything that was never meant to be  
All the perfect little things I could release  
All the nights every time we were just about to leave  
Now it makes no sense to me  
But it seems when we fall that's when we land perfectly**_

"But you love Peyton," Deb told him firmly. "I can tell by that twinkle in your eye. And even if your with someone else its not fair to any of you if you are in love with someone else." Deb told him.

Skills, who had been listening to the conversation, decided to butt in. "Luke dawg, Peyton pushed you away because of me," Skills told him honestly. "Peyton's scared of what she feels for you. I can tell she loves you… She's just scared. Peyton just hasn't had the best experience with guys. You have to show her your not going anywhere." Skills told him.

Lucas looked at him confused as to why Skills, who was also in love with Peyton was helping him. Before he could question him Skills butt in.

"I met someone else, her name is Allie and she's amazing. She's sarcastic and sweet and she loves basketball. She's the perfect girl for me and I am falling in love with her. Peyton deserves to be happy and I think you can do that for her." Skills told him sincerely. "After Jake, I never thought anyone but me deserved her but you're my dawg and you make her happy so if you love her then you should be with her and not hiding behind someone else.

_**Can't see what's before me  
Cannot feel the ground  
This place that we exist in  
Is the sweetest thing I found**_

_Maybe Skills is right. Maybe Peyton's just scared. I need to end things with Lindsey. No matter how much I like her, I love Peyton, and it's not fair to keep leading Lindsey on Plus I was going to break up with her before the pregnancy scare. I want to be with Peyton not Lindsey. I've always imagined being with Peyton and now I can be, as soon as I break up with Lindsey. But what happens if Peyton's baby daddy wants her?_ His mind countered. _It's still not right leading Lindsey on_. "Thanks Skills," Lucas told him.

"No problem. Why don't we get together and play a game at the river court later?" Skills asked.

"Sounds good," Lucas answered knowing that the little war over Peyton Sawyer was now over with that statement and they were friends once again.

---

As soon as Lucas walked out the door Brooke opened her mouth asking "So who's the dad?" Brooke asked her eyes wide in excitement. "It's Lucas isn't it?" Brooke guessed.

"Of course its Lucas'…" Peyton told her looking down at her stomach, avoiding Brooke's eyes.

"When? Where? How was it? How did you find out?" Brooke fired out.

"I'm 14 days pregnant… I found out because I collapsed at home and so I went to the doctor's to see what was wrong and they thought I might have cancer because of my birth mother so they ran all these tests and I found out I was pregnant." Peyton rambled.

"Wow," Brooke said. "But Lucas is dating Lindsey," Brooke said confused.

"It wasn't supposed to happen… I just… What am I going to do? How am I going to tell him? God why did I have to go over there?" Peyton asked not expecting an answer.

"What happened?" Brooke asked gently, her curiosity of dying to know.

_Flashback: _

_As soon as she got into her house she felt her knees buckle and she collapsed against the door. The tears flowed out of her eyes as she wiped them away. No matter what, it hurt that she had let him go but he had moved on. There was a new girl in his house. He told her he would wait for her and he moved on. He told her he wouldn't break her heart and yet he did. Her hands started shaking as her anger started consuming her. Standing up, she opened the door and slammed it behind her. She was sick of people telling her one thing and then doing another. She was tired of always being left behind. She was going to go back to the river court and give him a piece of her mind._

_Making her way to the river court she felt herself become angrier with the broody blonde haired man. As soon as she got to the river court she noticed he wasn't there and made the short trip to his house. He was going to get a piece of her mind, so she could move on like he had done. With her mind on her mission, she made it to Luke's and rapped on the door. _

_Lucas walked to the door with a pair of sweatpants hung low on his hips as he towel dried his hair, throwing the towel back in the bathroom before answering the door. _

"_Peyton," he breathed out softly. "What are you doing here?"_

"_You told me you would wait for me and you didn't… You told me you wouldn't break my heart and you did so do you keep any promises you make or what?" Peyton seethed her arms crossing over her chest protectively._

"_I…I…." Lucas was flabbergasted at the accusation. He knew he told Peyton he would wait for her but at the Halloween party she told him that it was a mistake. "You gave up on us!" He retaliated. _

"_I…I gave up on us? By wanting to know whom my heart lied with, I gave up on us? Then when I realized whom I didn't only love but was IN love with and came to tell that person ONE month later he's with someone else. YOU NEVER SAID THERE WAS ANYONE ELSE!" Peyton yelled before lowering her voice "But I guess I never meant that much to you to begin with… You just loved the idea of competing for me."_

_**The further away you push me  
The closer I feel to you**_

"_You never meant anything to me? Then why the hell did I write a book about you? Why did I kiss you at Tric?" Lucas asked agitated._

"'_Cause of your damn ego. Kissing me and me enjoying probably filled one of your goddamn high school fantasies! How the hell am I supposed to know?" Peyton asked throwing her hands up in the air. "You say one thing and then god knows you do the complete opposite. How the hell am I suppose to know why the hell you do anything? Your frickin hot and cold." Peyton told him as she tried to physically restrain herself from just going to him and choking the hell out of him. _

"_You told me that kissing me was a mistake. I moved on…why cant you just be happy for me?" Lucas asked "__Maybe you just didn't care until you saw that I moved on and now that I have, you're upset because it wasn't about you, or what you wanted" Lucas told her his hands on his hips as he looked at her troubled and irritated._

"_What I want? What I want? What I want is for you to just come face to face that you say one damn thing and then do another." Peyton said pointing at him and shaking her finger. "And when she breaks up with you or you get sick of her and come crawling to me forget it…'cause after tonight, I am done with you…" Peyton told him her eyes shining with unshed tears as she gathered as much inner strength as she could to walk out the back door and away from him._

"_Good bye Lucas," she whispered harshly before opening the door and stepping over the threshold not once looking back. _

"_Peyton," Lucas said grabbing her arm and turning her to face him, all his passion, pain, heartache and love rolling in his eyes as waves as his eyes searched hers trying to see if she was serious about being done with him. _

"_I'm done," she told him harshly, picking his hand off her arm and throwing it to the side._

"_Peyton wait," Lucas told her all thoughts of Lindsey gone and only the thought of Peyton leaving his life forever as he crashed his lips to hers._

_Peyton pulled back her eyes wide in shock as she lifted her hand up and slapped him with as much strength as she could. _How dare he? How dare he kiss her?_ She thought her chest heaving with confusion and anger as she looked at him. Her eyes moving down his face, which was gob smacked that she had slapped him and her anger dissipating as lust started to flow through her veins as she noticed Lucas wasn't wearing a shirt and looking back up she got lost in his baby blue eyes. _

_Before she knew what she was doing her hand wrapped around his head and pushing it down she felt his lips collide with hers. Needing more she shoved her tongue into his mouth. After the shock wore off Lucas let his hands tangle in her hair as their tongues battled for dominance, their teeth clanking against each other as their lips were fused together, Peyton's hands gripping Lucas shoulders, her nails digging into his flesh as their lips bruised each others._

_**Every fall every **__**crash**__**  
Everything that was never meant to be  
All the perfect little things I could release  
All the nights every time we were just about to leave  
Now it makes no sense to me  
But it seems when we fall that's when we land perfectly**_

_Each one needing the dominance, Lucas moved his mouth away from Peyton's and before she could complain placed a series of kisses to the __column of her neck and her collarbone, before doing the same to the other side of her neck. Peyton inwardly cursed Lucas for not wearing a shirt so she could just grab him and fuse their lips together as she felt his mouth against her neck until his lips reached the little junction of her collar bone and her head rolled back, moving her body closer to his so there was no space between them, she grinded her hips against his, smirking when she heard him let out a hiss._

_Needing more, Lucas shoved her against his house not caring about anything, Peyton felt her back hit the wall and a bubble of laughter started to spill out of her mouth as she remembered the last kiss they shared at Tric, not focusing as Lucas pulled at the hem of the Fall Out Boy sweatshirt before moving away and slipping the sweatshirt off leaving her in a black tank top and her jeans. His mouth moving to her tank top clad breast and leaving hot open mouthed kisses, before his lips trailed down again and he grabbed the hem of the tank top and yanked it off throwing it into his yard, Peyton grabbed his head and fused their lips together, she opened her mouth giving his tongue access, as his hand hit the siding on the house as he reached behind her and unclasped the black bra. Needing to be in control, her dainty little hands moved to his sweatpants and dipped in grabbing his hot, hard shaft and sliding it up and down. Lucas hissed as Peyton's hand wrapped around him and his mouth moved down her body before sucking on her breast his tongue swirling around her nipple making her gasp in pleasure. __**  
**_

_Wanting her completely Lucas moved his hands down to her jeans and unbuckled her button, before his hands unzipped her jeans pushing them down she stepped out of them. Her hands moved from his penis to the waistband of his sweatpants and pushed them down her leg coming up and circling his waist, and his hand ran up her smooth, silky legs. Cupping her, he felt her moist underwear, letting him know she was ready for him and groaned as she felt her tighten her leg around his waist. Moving her leg down, he slid the black bikini cut underwear down her legs, as she stepped out of them before her arms wrapped around his neck and she jumped wrapping both her legs around his waist tightly. Lucas grabbed her his one hand squeezing her ass as the other one held them closer to the house, his lips back on hers as he positioned himself at her center and looking into her eyes, slipped into her, stilling to let her get used to him. Needing more Peyton rocked her hips as he picked up the pace and slammed into her over and over, her feet pushing him farther in as she felt her orgasm building, and her tongue battling with his, when he flicked her nipple with his finger and pinched it she threw her head back her orgasm coming out which spurred on his, emptying his seed inside her their bodies sweaty as he rested his face in the crook of her neck._

_End Flashback_

"Anyways, after that I grabbed my clothes and left, I…I don't regret it but he's with someone. I helped him cheat on a girl and I feel so dirty." Peyton confided.

**The further away you push me  
The closer I feel to you**

"You guys had sex outdoors…"Brooke said astounded. "I'm so proud," she squealed happily.

"Brooke…what am I going to do?" Peyton whined.

"You're going to have to tell Broody he's going to be a dad…ooh I call dibs on designing the outfit the baby wears coming home…oh and I have to design you some hot maternity clothes! I'm so excited," Brooke said excitedly.

Peyton just watched her friend in mild amusement. _How am I going to tell Lucas? What about that girl that was at his house? Should I tell Lucas…god I fucked up _she thought_. Well if I don't tell Lucas Brooke will…how will he react? Is he going to be mad and think I fucked up his whole world? Is he going to think this was just some ploy to keep him in my life? Ugh my head hurts. _

_---_

Lucas arrived at Lindsey's and walked up to the door ringing the bell. He kept repeating the mantra _Lindsey deserves better…you have to stop leading her on…this is all for the best_. He cared for Lindsey, he really did, but no matter what she wasn't and could never be Peyton. Lindsey opened the door, her long sleeve blue shirt and jeans, showing just how opposite she was from Peyton who would wear rocker tees.

"Hi," Lindsey said pulling the door wider and ushering him in. "I thought you would be here sooner," she told him pecking him on the lips before walking to the kitchen, expecting him to follow her.

Lucas walked into the kitchen and saw Lindsey pulling out a bottle of wine and two glasses. He cleared his throat nervously. "Look Linds, I think we should talk," Lucas told her.

"What's wrong?" Lindsey asked coming to stand by Lucas and put her arm on his shoulder.

"This isn't working… I'm sorry. I'm in love with someone else. I never meant to hurt you… I care for you a lot but…I'm sorry I don't think its fair to keep leading you on.

Lindsey stood there her hand dropping off his shoulder, as her eyes filled with tears. "It's the blonde isn't it? The one that came over?" Lindsey asked.

Lucas ran his fingers through his hair. He knew he had to be honest. Lindsey deserved that much. "Yes," he told her honestly. "But I really did never mean to hurt you." He repeated.

"I know. The thing is I saw it coming all along. I just tried to wish it away... it wasn't fair to me or to you. I could tell there was something between you in the hall and when we would hang out with all your friends how you would look at her like you never looked at me…"Lindsey told him shedding a few tears.

"You deserve so much more than I could ever give you. You are a great girl Lindsey and I really hope maybe someday we can be friends." Lucas told her sincerely.

"Maybe…" Lindsey conceded. Walking to the door, she opened it up. "Good bye Lucas," she told him sadly.

"Bye," he replied walking out of the house and to his mustang to go back to see Peyton and tell her he wanted to be with her.

---

Peyton was laying in bed in silence, after Brooke had grilled her Doctor Copeland walked in and took her to get some tests done and check on the baby. Peyton had told her to go be with Derek for a while and that she would be fine. Now she was sitting listening to her I-pod that Brooke had brought listening to Perfectly, the lyrics washing over her. Her eyes closed as she let her self get lost in the music. Lucas walked in the room and saw Peyton with her eyes closed and sat in a chair next to her bed. "Why won't you tell me who the father is?" He whispered to what he believed to be her sleeping form.

"Because I'm scared of how you will react," she mumbled hearing him as her I-pod was switching songs.

Lucas looked at her, his eyebrows furrowed together as he wondered how she had heard him.

_**Every fall every crash  
Everything that was never meant to be  
All the perfect little things I could release  
All the nights every time we were just about to leave  
Now it makes no sense to me  
But it seems when we fall that's when we land perfectly**_

Turning her I-pod off, she opened her eyes and stared at Lucas' blue orbs staring at her. Sitting up a little she took a deep breath bracing herself. She knew she had to tell him now before she chickened out…plus if he freaked out she could just press the call button.

"It's yours Lucas…the baby is yours…" Peyton told him closing her eyes as she braced herself for his verbal attack.

**Perfectly  
Perfectly**


	26. Something Inside

**HJS-NS-23-Wow so we made it…this is the last chapter. I still have the epilogue to write, but I just want to thank everyone who reviewed. When I first started writing this is didn't think it would ever get as many reviews as it did or be as long as it was. This was the first full length fic I ever wrote by myself and I was so nervous posting it, but your reviews helped build my confidence and helped make this story what it is today. I know most of you were disappointed with the lack of naley and Nathan in the last chapter and I'm sorry but I needed to tie up Peyton's loose ends and that took me longer than I thought it was going to, but don't worry you find out what happened to Nathan in this chapter. Plus with Hilarie and Chad not coming back for season 7 that chapter was for all the leyton fans. Thank you so much to Allie for being a beta for this story and always helping me find a song to fit a chapter. Your thoughts always helped push me farther in my writing. Thank you to Hayley for pushing me to write this story when I was nervous and scared. Thank you to Steph, Lisa, and Maiike for helping me when I needed help finding quotes and always lending a ear when I needed one for this story. Thank you to EVERYONE who ever reviewed a chapter or who marked this story as his or her favorite or even marked this as an alert. This chapter is dedicated to all of you. I hope you love it and Thank you for reading this. The epilogue will be up sometime in the next month.**

**Song:** Something Inside-Jonathan Rhys Meyers

**Quote:** No love, no friendship can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever.

- Francois Mauriac

* * *

Nathan stood up as he saw a bunch of doctors standing around a body until he looked by the door and saw a man with green eyes and brown hair watching him with his arms across his chest.

"_Who are you?" Nathan questioned._

"_Josh Jagielski," Josh told him, as he looked at the doctors working on the body the beeping in the room still going off._

"_Am I dead?" Nathan asked._

"_No, not yet." Josh told him._

"_Then what's going on?" Nathan asked looking around the room, his eyebrows knitted in confusion. _

"_I'm here to show you what will happen if you don't fight for your life and get back to Haley," Josh told him seriously. "How your death will affect everyone's lives."_

"_Ok…" Nathan said still baffled by what was going on around him. _

_**When the one **__**thing**__** you're looking for  
Is nowhere to be found  
And you back stepping all of your moves  
Trying to figure it out**_

"_Follow me," Josh ordered walking through the wall as Nathan followed uncertainly behind him. When he got to the other side of the wall he expected to see the hospital hallway. Instead he stepped into an office, the desk piled with papers. "Where are we?" Nathan asked looking around the room and not recognizing it. _

"_New York… The big apple," Josh told him as he stood in a corner of the room waiting for the door to bust open._

"_Victoria, I told you to deal with the problems… I need to work on the new sketches… No I don't care that you don't like her. Deal with it!" Brooke yelled into the phone before pressing the end button and slamming it on the table. "Can't anyone do anything around here?" She questioned what she believed to be an empty room, her black business suit clingy to her body. _

"_She wants more designs but she can't handle one model… I dunno why I still have her around." Brooke spoke aloud, before forcefully grabbing a pencil and pen off her desk and sketching a new outfit. Her eyes left the page and, for a moment, rested across the room in a framed photo of them all taken at Tric on Halloween. Her face showed a sign of longing before she turned away and put on a mask of stone as someone knocked on the door._

"_What?" Brooke bellowed out._

"_Miss Davis, Miss Banks called and wanted to know if you could come on her show?" Her assistant squeaked out._

_Nathan watched in confusion as he watched Brooke sit straight up and glare at the innocent girl. "Tell Tyra I am to busy and to find someone else," Brooke said menacingly._

_**You wanna reach out  
You wanna give in**_

_Nathan stared in shock. _Who was this girl?_ This was not the Brooke he knew who was sweet and kind to everyone and always wanted to promote her business. _This Brooke was cold and a little scary_ he thought as Brooke glared at the young woman forcing her to retreat with her tail tucked behind her. _How had his death affected her this much? Had she turned this way because of him? What had happened? _Nathan looked to Josh his eyes searching for an answer. _

"_I will explain after you see a little more," Josh told him walking through Brooke's door and to Lucas' bedroom._

_What are we doing in Lucas' bedroom? Nathan wondered, before spotting his brother sprawled out on his bed. Beer bottles and trash lined the floor and the furniture in the room, and the smell almost made Nathan gag. It smelled like rotten cheese. Lucas opened his eyes and saw the red head lying next to him. Nudging her, she rolled over. "Ready for round two baby?" She purred reaching over and running a finger down his chest. "Hell no. You can leave now," Lucas told her coldly before turning over and grabbing the pillow she was using to put over his eyes. The sunlight was killing him. "Come on, don't you want some more?" She asked brushing her bare chest across his back._

"_Leave," he told her, finality in his voice. _

"_Fine," the red head huffed getting out of the bed and grabbing her clothes that were strewn around the room and putting them on._

"_You know you can't drink her memory away forever," she told him before walking out of the house and slamming the back door._

"_Watch me," Lucas muttered before grabbing a pair of boxers off the floor and stumbling to the kitchen and into the fridge grabbing a six pack before stumbling his way back to his room and moving the blinds on the window so the room was enclosed in darkness. Falling on his bed, he popped the cap of a bottle before slamming it and repeating the process, barely even tasting the cool beverage on his tongue, needing the liquor to demolish the thoughts of the curly blonde that had started to seep in his brain as he became sober._

"_Wow, he's a pig now and he really needs to lay off the beer. I can't believe Lucas could be such a ass to a woman." Nathan told Josh._

"_Well, he is trying to battle his demons about not being able to play a part in his daughter's life and losing the love of his life," Josh told him honestly._

"_I was the love of his life?" Nathan joked as Josh just gave him a look. "Kidding," Nathan chided holding his hands up in the air. "Lucas has a daughter?" Nathan asked._

"_Yeah, with Peyton, but when you died she pushed him away and he became a shell, only feeling something when he's drinking and having sex with random women. Everyone's fate is somehow intertwined and when one thread breaks, it wreaks havoc on everyone and people deal with grief on their own. Lucas lost a brother and his soul mate in the same week._

"_Wow," Nathan breathed out, surprise at his brother's behavior._

"_Are you ready to see Peyton?" Josh asked putting a hand on Nathan's shoulder. _

"_I guess," Nathan responded looking around the littered room once more before they walked through the door and into a red bedroom. He didn't recognize the room, but he saw a baby's crib at the end of the bed and since Josh had said they would see Peyton next he figured this was her room. The baby cried as Peyton rushed out of the bathroom and to the crib. _

"_Shh baby it's okay. Nothing's going to happen, I promise. Mommy's got you. I promise I'm never leaving you." Peyton cooed to the child in her arms. The blonde tuff of hair ticking her arm as the babies blue eyes penetrated into her green eyes._

_Nathan smiled at the maternal side of Peyton. She didn't look like she was doing so bad," Nathan mused, as he looked over at Josh and saw his lips in a tight line. _

_Nathan glanced around the room and saw on her wall a painting of Haley, Brooke, another man who looked remarkably like the man standing next to him, Josh, two blonde woman, an older man, and Lucas under the words 'Everyone Leaves.' Under that were the words never letting anyone in again besides and a picture of the baby that was nestled in Peyton's arms. _

"_Peyton never leaves the house. She quit teaching and she started sketching. She has a woman come over every two weeks to collect drawings and sells them. She has another person do her grocery shopping. Peyton never leaves the house because, after you died, Haley pushed her away and that finally broke her. Haley was her best friend and she pushed her away, showing that in the end everyone leaves her and she doesn't want to leave her daughter. She told Lucas he was not allowed to see her child and that he should forget she even exists. Lucas tried fighting but it was futile, after all no matter what he did she would just slam the door on him, or hang up or if he was really lucky he would hear her bitch at him that everyone was the same and she would not let him leave her just like everyone else had done in her life and she didn't want her daughter growing up with people leaving her, especially her father. Peyton pushed Brooke away and Brooke being hurt and upset focused on her work and things with her and Derek became tense and they ended up breaking each other's hearts._

"_All this happened because I died?" Nathan whispered in awe._

"_Yes. Let's go see our girl," Josh told him walking out of the room not even bothering to look back and make sure that Nathan was following._

_They stepped into Haley's living room and Nathan's breath caught in his throat as he saw Haley. She looked radiating in the soft glow of the lamp sitting next to her. He looked at Josh as if to say she looks fine before moving closer to her sitting on the couch. He noticed the tear tracks down her cheeks and the deep dark circles under her eyes as she stared into oblivion. Her beautiful brown eyes were bloodshot, and she seemed almost lifeless. _

_**Your head's wrapped around what's around the next bend  
You wish you could find something warm  
'Cause you're shivering cold**_

"_She's not dead is she?" Nathan asked worried, his heart contracting in his chest seeing Haley so miserable because of him._

"_No," Josh answered his heart aching seeing Haley this way. "After you died Haley lost the will to truly live and she closed off her heart. Everyday she wakes up and takes a shower crying in it before getting out and crying some more. She wipes off the tears and goes and teaches her classes half heartedly before coming back and getting a tub of cookie dough ice cream and eating the cold substance, while holding on to dear life that framed phone of the two of you taken at the beach" Josh said waving his hand towards Haley's hand where Nathan could see a clutched photo of them._

_**It's the first thing you see as you open your eyes  
The last thing you say as your saying goodbye  
Something inside you is crying and driving you on**_

_Nathan stepped closer and saw the photo of them. It was one day where they had gone to the beach._

**Flashback:**

"**Come on Hales," Nathan called out from the hallway as he waited for his girlfriend to finish getting ready. As soon as she descended from the stairs, his breath caught in his throat. She was wearing a spaghetti strap tank top with a pair of blue jean shorts and he could see the strings of her bikini around her neck. **

"**Okay I have the towels, and sunscreen and a book… You have the food right?" Haley asked when she saw Nathan.**

"**Yea, it's in the car. The only thing that isn't is you," Nathan said teasingly.**

"**I'm coming, I'm coming. Hang on," Haley told him pretending to be annoyed as she stepped up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Let's go," she told him popping a quick kiss to his cheek before walking to his black SUV, turning around when she opened the door. "Come on," she told him giggling as he gave her a glare and went to the drivers side.**

**The two got to the beach about 10 minutes later and looked for a good spot to put their stuff while they swam. "We can go for a walk after we cooled off to find a place to eat," Haley told him lifting her turquoise tank top over her head and revealing a brown bikini top, before shimming out of her jeans. Nathan felt his blood go south as she bent down and grabbed the sun block before she started lubricating her body. Yanking off his shirt he moved towards her taking the bottle from her and pouring some in his hands before going behind Haley and putting the lotion on her back. Haley felt herself relax as Nathan massaged the lotion into her back, blushing when his arms wrapped around her and started putting lotion on her chest. "Nathan," she tried to say but instead coming out in a moan as his hand ran down her body. "We can't do this here… Public beach," she mumbled coherently her head resting on his chiseled chest. **

"**Fine, but when we go find a place to eat Hales, no one will be around," he promised whispering in her ear before kissing her collarbone and running in to the water.**

**The two splashed and played in the water for a couple of hours. Nathan had just picked Haley up bridal style to throw her in the water when her stomach let out a loud rumble indicating she was hungry. Haley stared up into his eyes in embarrassment as he chuckled. "Well, I guess I better get some food in you," he told her as he started walking towards the shoreline.**

**Nathan gently placed her down on her feet before he grabbed the cooler and the backpack. Haley interlaced their fingers as the duo made their way to a more secluded part of the beach.**

**The two climbed up a small hill and when they got to the top it they were surrounded by little purple wildflowers. "Wow, it's so pretty," Haley told him as they laid their towels on the grass and sat down.**

**Nathan opened the cooler and took out two ham and cheese sandwiches and a couple bags of Doritos. "Here," Nathan said, handing Haley a sandwich and chips before reaching in the cooler and getting a water, placing it on the towel next to her.**

**The two sat there eating their dinner as they talked about their childhoods and how Haley's classes were treating her and how Nathan thought his basketball team would do.**

**The sun started to set and Haley looked at Nathan as he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her into his side. Haley nestled into his side and smiled as she inhaled his scent. "We should take a picture," Haley told him her arms holding onto his torso.**

"**Why? Can't get enough of my sexy body Hales?" Nathan asked cockily. **

**Haley just blushed before reaching into the backpack and pulling out the camera. "Please?" She pouted jutting out her bottom lip as she gave him her best puppy dog eyes.**

**Nathan just stared at her before taking the camera and holding it out he snapped a picture of the two. Haley grabbed the camera and put it back in the bag as Nathan moved her to sit between his legs, his arms wrapping around her stomach as her head lay on his chest watching the sun set.**

**End Flashback**

"_That was a great night," Nathan told Josh smiling as he remembered holding Haley as they watched the sunset in a field of purple flowers. After it had gotten dark Nathan had picked Haley a bouquet of the little purple flowers, which she had smiled and he realized then he needed to tell her he loved her._

"_Yea sounds like it," Josh told him honestly._

"_Was she this bad when she lost you?" Nathan asked curiously._

"_No…" Josh told him, "She loved you more than she ever loved me and after losing you, she decided she never wanted to try and fall in love again because she started believing in Peyton's idea of everybody leaves. They were each other's rocks. By Haley pushing everyone away after losing you, that triggered everyone else. Haley loves you and I know you love her," Josh told him seriously, "I once told her she needed to move on. That was the day she met you. I watched you exchange small talk and the looks. It was love at first sight. I knew then that she was never truly mine and that even if I hadn't died we still wouldn't have been together because she is your soul mate, not mine. But if you ever hurt her and make her turn into this I will haunt your ass, so that you wished you were dead," Josh told him seriously. _

"_I can't let her end up like this. I need to go back and fight. I need to tell her I love her when I'm not almost dying so she knows I wasn't lying and that I really do love her. She's my own personal angel. I love her with all my heart and if you help me get back to reality, I will make sure I show her just how much I love her everyday for the rest of our lives. I can't imagine ever being alive and trying to live my life without her. When she broke up with me, I was a mess. I honestly believed that she didn't love me and that killed me because of how much I love her and need her in my life. Take me back to that hospital so I can fight to show her that every man she loves is not killed." Nathan told him._

"_You mean every man she loves is not killed by the same psycho who happens to be my brother?" Josh joked lightly._

"_Yea. Can you help me get back?" Nathan asked vulnerably. "Yea," Josh told him leading him through the wall and back to the hospital room where he had first met Josh._

"_Take care of our girl," Josh told him seriously._

"_I will," Nathan promised. _

"_Okay, now just wish you were back in your body and fall into it" Josh instructed as Nathan gave the other man a firm handshake before doing what he was told to do._

"We got him back," Doctor Smith called out as they heard the ECG beeping.

_---_

Lucas let Peyton's words wash over him…baby…his? Its not possible…she wouldn't know if it was his this early…why would she lie to him? Don't you have to wait a month before you take a pregnancy test?

"H…how?" Lucas croaked out in disbelief.

_Are you fucking kidding me? _Peyton thought to herself. "Well, Lucas when a man and a woman have sex and don't use protection it most likely results in a baby," Peyton told him in a patronizing tone.

"That's not what I meant and you know it," Lucas said standing up and putting his hands on his waist. "Don't you have to wait a month to know if you're pregnant?" Lucas asked his voice even as he tried to control his temper.

"You're right Lucas. This is all some part of an evil plot to get you to stay in my life… I'm lying and I even paid the damn doctor to lie…but oh wait…you can find out you're pregnant by going to the hospital because after a person collapses at home and goes to the doctors to see what was wrong and why they collapse they run tests…but instead of it being nothing and me worrying about having cancer, I found out I'm fucking pregnant THAT'S HOW!" Peyton yelled anger coursing through her veins that he couldn't accept he was going to be a dad. "But you know what?" Peyton said after a moment of silence. "If you don't want to be a part of this baby's life then fine" Peyton told him forcefully. "No one asked you or told you that you had to be."

"I…I wow…" Lucas finally spit out collapsing back on the chair beside Peyton's bed. "It's really mine?" He asked quietly.

"Yea…who knew outside sex could result in a pregnancy," she joked, a feeble smile playing over her face as she finally looked at Lucas' eyes and saw the look of fear in them mixed with something she couldn't quite decipher.

"Thank god," he whispered before standing up and leaning over her, his lips brushing over hers in a soft chaise kiss, as he lovingly cupped her cheek.

"Wait…what?" Peyton breathed out the confusion showing in her eyes.

"I really didn't want you to have any other man's baby. "I love you Peyton." He told her honestly. "I just couldn't believe one of my dreams really came true."

"But Lindsey?" She whispered uncertainly, her green eyes searching his frantically trying to figure out how he had done a complete 360 in 2 seconds.

"I ended things with her today. She wasn't you. She wasn't curly hair, chickeny legs and venom." Lucas said lovingly stroking her cheek.

"Wow" Peyton said letting it all sink in. He was being mushy but for once she didn't care. "I love you too," Peyton told him, feeling the walls she had put around her heart finally disappear and the weight about telling Lucas he was going to be a dad off her shoulders.

"And I love this life we created already growing in you," he declared moving his hand so it rested on her stomach as his other hand snaked behind her head and lifted her up kissing her forehead tenderly.

"We're going to be a family," he told her staring into her green eyes.

---

Haley was sitting in the waiting room with Nathan's mom, Skills, Allie, Derek and Brooke. When Haley got back to the waiting room she saw her cousin wrapped in Skills arms, Allie's soft voice whispering into Skill's ears as she rubbed his back.

Haley looked at her confused until it all clicked. Allie had been sneaking in because she had been out with Skills. Haley smiled knowing that they would make a good couple and she could see how much Skills cared about her cousin.

Derek and Brooke were cuddled on a love seat both looking noticeably less stressed since Peyton had woken up. Haley still hadn't gone to see her. What do you tell your pregnant best friend who almost died because of you? Plus she knew Lucas was in Peyton's room and Haley secretly hoped the two would finally get together after the dance they had been doing for the past few months.

A doctor chose that moment to step into the waiting room. Haley noticed him first and sat straighter in her chair as Deb looked up and saw the doctor getting up and walking towards him.

"How did the surgery go?" Deb asked nervously.

Haley moved in her chair so she would be able to hear the doctor better, holding her breath as she listened.

"Well, we lost him for a minute during the surgery, but we were able to bring him back and stabilize him. "We got the bullet out and were able to stop the bleeding. So, all in all, the surgery was successful. He should be waking up soon after the anesthesia wears off.

Haley finally released the breath she had been holding on at the news that he was going to be okay.

"Can we see him?" Haley asked timidly from her chair.

"Well, we would like to keep it to one person at a time and if he wakes up when your in there immediately get a doctor" Doctor Smith told her as Haley nodded. "He is in room 323." He added before walking away.

"Haley, you can go first," Deb told her gently.

"You sure?" Haley asked nervously.

"Yeah, he would probably want to see your face when he woke up than mine" Deb said with a smile.

"Thank you," Haley said giving her a small smile before walking to room 323. Her thoughts were at Nathan and how she was scared to see him lying in the hospital bed. The hospital bed that she was partially at fault for putting him in.

_**It's the first thing you see as you open your eyes  
The last thing you say as your saying goodbye  
Something inside you is crying and driving you on**_

She had made it to the door, her insides squirming with butterflies as her hands shook reaching for the door handle. She felt the tears prick her eyes and turned away walking towards another room. She got to room 333 and stopped, opening the door and feeling her breath hitch in her throat as she saw her best friend sitting up in a hospital gown. "I'm so sorry," Haley said.

"Come here," Peyton told her holding open her arms as Haley walked to her and wrapped her best friend in a hug.

"I'm so sorry," Haley cried into Peyton's shoulder.

"It's not your fault. I'm fine… The baby is fine and hell even Lucas is okay by now," Peyton said with a smile as Lucas playfully glared at her.

"I should have told you I was getting letters… I should have stopped you from coming in… I should've told Josh to leave you alone," Haley told her sitting on the edge of the bed and grasping Peyton's hand.

_**'Cause if you hadn't found me  
I would have found you  
I would have found you**_

"Hales…there's nothing you could have done…well, except tell me about the letters. But I'm okay and I am sure Nathan is going to be okay. Have you heard anything about him yet?" Peyton asked.

"He's out of surgery and he umm they lost him for a couple minutes but got them back and he should be okay but Peyt, I'm scared. What if he realizes I'm not worth losing his life over or he hates me for keeping this from him?" Haley questioned.

"Hales, that man loves you…and anyone who sees you with him knows that you love him. You guys have a love that's always and forever. He was so scared for you in that classroom and he tried to protect you…if he was ever mad at you that went away when your life was in danger. I think he realized then that even you who seemed so angelic to him falls every once in a while. You need to go see him and FINALLY tell that man you love him and stop being so scared because take it from me you can't hide your heart forever." Peyton told her.

"I love you," Haley said hugging Peyton.

"I love you to Hales," Peyton told her rubbing her back before the two parted. "Now, I am going to want details of everything you two talk about!" Peyton told her pointing a finger at her and giving her a stern glare.

"Promise," Haley said standing up and walking out of the room.

---

As soon as she got to the room she felt her hand shake as she reached out and touched the cold metal of the door handle before taking a deep breath and pushing open the door. Seeing Nathan lying in a hospital bed her breath caught in her throat. He looked so peaceful like he was sleeping and nothing could hurt him. She felt the tears prickle her eyes as she moved a chair to rest next to his bed and took his hand in hers.

_**So long you've been running in circles  
'Round what's at stake  
But now the times come for your feet to stand still in one place  
You wanna reach out  
You wanna give in  
Your head's wrapped around what's around the next bend**_

"Hi," she whispered as a tear escaped and slid down her cheek. "I'm so sorry," she told him taking his hand in hers and intertwining their fingers together. "But you have to wake up now. Please." She begged. "Just squeeze my hand so I know your okay." She said praying he would do as she asked. Laying her head now next to their hands she let out the tears she had been holding while sitting in the waiting room.

Nathan heard Haley's voice and tried to open his eyes but his lids felt so heavy. Using all the strength he could muster he squeezed her hand lightly. Haley's breath stopped as she looked at their tangled hands before looking at his eyes. "Nathan?" She questioned anxiously. "Come on wake up," she told him pleadingly.

Nathan flickered his eyelids before opening them and seeing Haley's chocolate brown orbs staring at him.

_**You wish you could find something warm  
'Cause you're shivering cold  
It's the first thing you see as you open your eyes  
The last thing you say as your saying goodbye**_

"Water," he murmured his throat was dry and he needed water before he would be able to talk to Haley.

Haley grabbed the water that was sitting on his nightstand and poured him a glass before sticking a straw in it and holding it for him to take a drink. She felt her stomach contract as she waited to hear that he never wanted to see her again.

Nathan took a drink before looking at Haley, her eyes shining with tears. Slowly, he lifted his arm that wasn't interlocked with Haley's and brushed away a tear. His eyes bore into hers as he wordlessly asked if she was okay.

_**Something inside you is crying and driving you on  
It's the first thing you see as you open your eyes  
The last thing you say as your saying goodbye  
Something inside you is crying and driving you on**_

"Hales," he spoke his voice still a little gravely.

"I'm so sorry… I'm so, so, so sorry," Haley interrupted before he could say anything else. Nathan just opened his arms and she fell into them, her tears wetting his hospital gown as he rubbed her back soothingly, just holding her close to him and closing his eyes. _My girl is okay and no one is ever going to hurt her again if I can help it_ he thought to himself.

"Baby, it's okay." Nathan told her soothingly as she looked up at him.

"But you almost died," she told him not believing that he wasn't angry with her.

"But I didn't and I'm fine and you're okay right?" he asked brushing a stray strand of hair back behind her ear.

She nodded slowly her eyes still filled with fear.

"Then that's all that matters." He told her. "God I love you," he said trying to convey how much by the tone in his voice as his eyes locked with hers waiting nervously for her response.

_**'Cause if you hadn't found me  
I would have found you  
I would have found you**_

Haley sat their flabbergasted as the tears continued to roll down her eyes. "I love you too, so much," she told him brushing a hand through the back of his hair before gently pressing her lips to his. Nathan deepened the kiss, his tongue tangling with hers until they parted needing to breathe.

Nathan stared at Haley, her eyes sparkling as she looked at him lovingly.

"I could love you forever," he told her seriously.

Haley bit her lip before responding. "So could I," she said knowing she had never loved someone as much as she loved Nathan and she never would.

_**It was your first taste of love  
Living upon what you had**_

"I don't ever wanna lose you like I almost did in that classroom," he whispered.

"You won't," Haley told him brushing her hand through his hair as she looked at him worried.

Nathan thought back to his journey with Josh and how his heart broke when he saw Haley cry. He hated seeing her cry and he knew he would never find anyone as beautiful as her inside and out. Nathan stared at Haley intently wondering how in the hell he was so lucky to have met her.

_**It's the first thing you see when you open your eyes  
The last thing you say as your saying goodbye  
Something inside you is crying and driving you on**_

"Marry me," he demanded softly.

"What?" Haley asked sitting back a little her eyes searching his to make sure he was serious.

"I love you Haley James and I never want to live another day without you. I almost died and I realized I couldn't because I had to come back to you and tell you how much I love you and that I never want to be without you. I am going to show you that not everyone you love dies because we are going to grow old together Hales and have so many babies. All you have to do is say yes." Nathan told her his thumb stroking her cheek as his blue eyes pleadingly asked her to say yes.

Haley stared at him. She couldn't believe this was happening. _I thought I lost him and now he's proposing. I love him so much_. She thought. Before she knew what she was doing, she let the words slide through her lips.

_**'Cause if you hadn't found me  
I would have found you**_

"Yes," she whispered smiling as she saw him smile before he cupped her cheek and brought her lips down to his.

"You won't regret this Hales," he told her.

"I know I wont…I love you so much," she told him.

"I love you too baby," he replied before kissing her passionately.

_**I would have found you  
I would have found you  
I would have found you**_


	27. Epilogue: Even Angel's Fall

**HJS-NS-23- Wow so it's been awhile since I've updated this story. Sorry but here is the long awaited epilogue. I have to say this story is like my first-born baby. It was my first multi-chapter story I wrote by myself and I am truly happy with how it matured and came to be. Thank you to everyone who reviewed any chapter of this story and for all the people who reviewed every single chapter you are amazing. I would like to give a big thanks to Allie, Steph, Lisa, Hayley and Maiike for always letting me lean on you and bounce ideas off of you for this story. I am currently writing a leyton story, which I will most likely post when I finish it so you all don't have to wait for updates, it's called What's Meant to Be Will Always Find a Way. Anyways enjoy and please review, like all good things this story must too come to an end.**

**Song:** Even Angels Fall- Jessica Riddle

**Quote:** True love never lives happily ever after – true love has no ending.

-K. Knight

* * *

**5 years later:**

Haley smiled as she felt Nathan pull her closer to his chest. Her eyelids fluttered open as she stared at Nathan's face. She moved her hand and ran it down his strong, chiseled jaw as she watched him sleep, her gold band glinting in the sun that was trying to evade the room through the curtains. Nathan opened his eyes and smiled at Haley. Even after being married for almost 4 years, he still made her heart race.

"Morning baby" Nathan told her softly bringing her as close to him as her stomach would allow with how pregnant she was right now.

"Merry Christmas," Haley replied inching up to kiss him good morning. The kiss soon grew heated as Nathan's tongue snaked out and ran over the seam of Haley's lips, begging for entrance, which she happily granted. The hand that had been tracing Nathan's face moved to his strong, muscular arm as she pulled it, wordlessly telling him she wanted him on top of her. Without breaking the kiss Nathan maneuvered so he was hovering over Haley, his arms holding him up so he wouldn't crush the baby. Haley's hand fisted in Nathan's hair as she felt the temperature in the room spike as his lips moved from hers down to her neck. Her right hand pressed into his back when he found her pulse point and started sucking on it. Nathan used one hand to hold himself up as the other hand moved down her body, deliberately grazing her breast before making his way down her hips and to her thighs where the blue nightie ended. His hand grabbed the hem on the silk nightie and slowly, almost torturing lifted it up. Haley moaned in want and anticipation as Nathan's calloused hands moved up. Haley rubbed her thighs together trying to create some friction as Nathan's lips moved down to her shoulder slipping the strap down with his teeth before moving to her chest and pressing a kiss above her breast prior to moving to her breast. Haley arched her back off the bed as Nathan's hot and talented mouth covered her breast and his hand moved to her core.

"Oh god Nathan" Haley moaned.

"You like that baby." Nathan replied cockily.

Before Haley could chastise him or answer a small cry emitted down the hall stilling the couple. Haley and Nathan both froze waiting to see if the child would continue to cry or call for them. The young child then called momma from the baby monitor that was lying on the nightstand.

_**You've found hope  
You've found faith,  
Found how fast she could take it away.  
Found true love,  
Lost your heart.  
Now you don't know who you are.**_

"Son of a bitch" Nathan muttered in exasperation as he tried to call himself down, his cock painfully hard as Haley tried to slow her heart beat down. Standing up she pushed the nightgown down and fixed the strap before longingly looking at Nathan and walking out the door and to the bedroom where the little child stood in his crib, his little arms reaching to be picked up.

"Momma" the little boy cooed as Haley reached down and smiled at him. "Merry Christmas Jamie" Haley told him placing him on her hip as she made her way back to where Nathan was laying in bed. Sitting on the edge of the bed Haley put her son down and watched as he gravitated into his father's open arms. Once he was safely sitting on Nathan's stomach she laid down and the two parents played with the little boy.

---

Brooke woke up and saw her husband sleeping next to her. She was excited that he was going to be here for Christmas this year since he missed it last year being overseas. She was on her knees peering down at him, her hands on his shoulders as she shook him up. "Wake up, wake up, wake up, its Christmas," she told him excitedly like a child.

Derek groaned, not wanting to wake up. Opening one eye, he noticed how Brooke was perched and turned to wrap his hands around her waist to make sure she didn't fall off the bed in all of her excitement.

"Be careful," his deep voice told her closing his eyes to try and get some more sleep.

"It's Christmas! Wake up," Brooke ordered as Derek opened his eyes again smiling as Brooke moved one of her hands to her stomach and placing her hand to where her daughter was kicking. "Even your daughter thinks you need to wake up so we can open up presents. Come on please," Brooke pouted trying to get Derek to cave. "If we have enough time before we have to go to Naley's I will make it worth your while," Brooke said seductively using her finger to run down his chiseled chest to where his pajama pants sat on his hips.

"Okay," Derek caved grabbing Brooke and bringing her closer so he could kiss her.

"Merry Christmas," Derek told her before letting her go and rolling out of bed before walking to the other side and helping Brooke down before making their way down the stairs.

_**She made it easy,  
Made it free,  
Made you hurt til you couldn't see.  
Sometimes it stops,  
Sometimes it flows,  
But baby that is how love goes.**_

"What are you making us for breakfast?" Brooke asked flashing him a dimpled smile when he turned around and stopped.

"What do you want?" Derek asked knowing that would be a safer question. He never knew what Brooke would want with her cravings and a happier Brooke made his life better and right now she was happy so he was going to try and keep her that way for as long as possible.

"Hmmm…" Brooke said pretending to think as she tapped her chin with a manicured finger. "Chocolate chip pancakes with apples and strawberries on top" Brooke told him as Derek smiled at her.

_That's not that bad of a craving_ he thought. _That's something I would actually eat unlike the vanilla ice cream with pickles she wanted last night. _

"And what did you buy me?" Brooke asked trailing behind him as he walked into the kitchen and started to get out the ingredients for their meal.

"I'm not telling you. You have to eat first," he told her sternly smiling as she stomped her foot and pouted. Sometimes he wondered how their daughter would look doing the same thing. He hoped she looked like Brooke and get some of her mannerisms. He couldn't wait to meet their daughter in 2 months.

---

Lucas was in the kitchen making French toast sprinkled with powdered sugar as Peyton slept knowing that she needed her sleep and if he woke her up before 7, it would not be pretty. Not paying attention to the little blonde girl that was supposed to be watching Mickey Mouse's version of a Christmas Carol that he had put on TV knowing she was too excited to go back to sleep especially after they came out here and saw all the presents Santa had left for her. She had wanted to wake up Peyton, but after telling her they had to wait until 7:30 to wake mommy up she had asked him to make her breakfast. Seeing her daddy was busy in the kitchen, Leighton Bailey Scott got off the couch and tip toed down to her parents room where her mommy was sleeping with her baby brother.

Using her 4-year-old legs, she crawled onto the bed and laid next to her mom, touching the stomach where they said her baby brother was. She was excited to be a big sister. Her Aunt Brooke even got her an "I'm the big sister" t-shirt for when the baby was born in two months. "Mommy" Leighton whispered trying not to alert her daddy she was in their room before she woke her mommy up. She really wanted those presents.

"Mommy," Leighton said a little louder this time looking at the door to make sure her father wasn't by it or she would get in trouble for waking her mom. Using her little hands she shook her shoulder, before moving by Peyton's ear. "Momma" she said in her normal voice, Peyton smiling as she kept her eyes closed seeing how long it would take before the little girl got frustrated and gave up.

"Wake up, it's Christmas" she told her moving her little hands to Peyton's cheeks and moving her head. Making a big huff the little blonde laid down in frustration in her Christmas nightie, an early gift Santa had dropped off last night. Peyton moved her arm and wrapped it around the little girl pulling her to her side before stroking the child's head. The little girl scooted up eagerly knowing she was close to getting her mom up. "Momma" Leighton asked putting her hands on the bed and pushing up so her little face was in front of her moms. "Wake up" she demanded. "Pwease" she softened trying to use every tactic in her little book that she could think of. Peyton finally opened her eyes to see the little girls' frizzy blonde curls framing her face. "Momma, took you long enough" the little girl said in exasperation as Peyton smiled before pushing some of the curls out of her daughters eyes.

"Merry Christmas baby" Peyton told her.

"I'm not a baby; I'm 4" Leighton told her. "He's the baby" she responded pointing to her mother's stomach. Peyton laughed, before trying to sit up against the headboard.

"Where's daddy?" Peyton questioned grabbing a hair tie off the nightstand and pulling her hair into a pony.

"Making breakfast" Leighton said.

"And does he know you're in here?" Peyton asked curiously.

"I don't know." Leighton responded her blue eyes looking into her mother's where Peyton noticed a mischievous glimmer in them and laughed to herself knowing that Lucas had probably told her not to wake her up.

"Well then we should go eat breakfast so you can see what Santa got you and tell daddy Merry Christmas huh?" Peyton asked.

"Okay but if Daddy asks Sawyer woke you up not me" Leighton told her skipping out into the living room ahead of her mother.

_**You will fly and you will crawl;  
God knows even angels fall.  
No such thing as you lost it all.  
God knows even angels fall.**_

Peyton chuckled before waddling to the kitchen and leaning against the counter. Lucas saw his wife of 4 years and smiled giving her a kiss before adding more powder sugar to the French toast. "Leighton wake you up?" He asked as he looked into the living room and saw the little girl sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Kinda" Peyton answered vaguely before turning towards the little girl and winking at her. "Is breakfast ready?" She asked moving to sit in a chair and get off her feet.

"Ready" Lucas told her before calling Leighton to come sit at the table and eat.

"But daddy I wanna see what Santa got me" Leighton told him exasperated, especially since it was so hard getting her mom out of bed.

"After breakfast" Lucas told her, putting a plate and a glass of milk at her chair and then doing the same for himself and Peyton.

---

It was around 10:30 when Peyton, Lucas and Leighton arrived at Nathan and Haley's. Nathan was playing with James Lucas Scott on the floor, a plush basketball in his hand. Lucas went and sat on the couch in the living room watching his brother and his son, while Leighton and Peyton made their way to the kitchen where Haley was checking on the turkey and other food. Peyton handed Haley over her dish of brownies for dessert and also a plate of gingerbread men her and Leighton had baked together last night so Santa could have both sugar cookies and gingerbread men.

"You need any help?" Peyton asked noticing that Haley seemed to have her hands full.

"Not right now, but Nathan is going to have to take the pies out of the oven later." Haley told smiling as Peyton chuckled.

"When's Brooke supposed to be here?" Peyton asked.

"Now, but you know Brooke she has to be fashionably late." Haley answered before motioning the to the table where the two pregnant woman and the little girl sat down.

"Did you get anything good from Santa?" Haley asked Leighton.

"I got lots of candy in my stocking" Leighton responded her eyes wide in excitement. "And I got a new princess movie and an art set so I can paint like mommy and Santa even got me some books that daddy says he'll read to me. I was really good this year so I can't wait to see what mommy and daddy bought me," Leighton answered excitedly.

At that moment Brooke Davis, in a red dress, walked through the door, Derek walking behind before making sure Brooke made it in the kitchen and sat down before going to sit on the other end of the couch where Lucas was sitting.

"Oh, Leighton you look adorable in your dress" Brooke gushed smiling at the 4 year old in an emerald dress with a little bow in front that was identical to the one her mother was wearing. Leighton may have had Lucas' ice blue eyes, but the dress still looked amazing on the little girl.

"Thanks Aunt Brooke" Leighton told her, standing up to give her a hug. "I'm so glad you made me and mommy matching dresses. Are you going to make one for your baby when it comes out?" Leighton asked innocently putting her small hand on Brooke's round stomach.

"Yea, how about after the baby is born I will make you matching dresses?" Brooke questioned.

"But what about my baby brother?" Leighton asked innocently.

"Hunny boys don't wear dresses," Peyton told her. "But maybe when he's born I can sketch something for you" Peyton placated. The little girl tapped her chin in thought before a grin came on her face and she nodded eagerly.

"And Aunt Haley's baby can have a dress like mine and your baby right Aunt Brooke?" Leighton asked curiously.

"Sure" Brooke said. "After all you will all be cousins, so why not." Brooke smiled as the little girl bounced into the living room telling the boys she wanted to play.

"So how were your morning's?" Haley asked, wondering how Leighton liked her presents.

"Well, Leighton woke me up, getting pissed when I pretended to be asleep and then we had our official Christmas breakfast of French Toast with "snow"" Peyton told them using her hands to emphasize the snow, "and then she got to open her stocking stuffers and I got to sit and drink my gross decaf coffee. I tell you I can't wait until this baby comes out so I can go back to drinking my regular coffee." Peyton said rubbing her hands over her belly.

"I defiantly agree with you there. Derek won't let me have my vente Carmel Frappuccino and, I swear, as soon as this kid is out, he is buying me one or I will divorce his ass" Brooke said grumbling as she rubbed her stomach like Peyton.

"I wonder how much of that comment is the hormones?" Haley asked raising an eyebrow and laughing when Brooke stuck her tongue out at her.

"Seriously, I know I'm not suppose to have much caffeine, but still I want my drink!" Brooke pouted.

"How about on our next lunch date we stop at Starbucks. Our little secret," Peyton whispered trying to lean over as much as she could with her belly not getting stuck between her and the table.

"Oooh P. Sawyer I knew I was friends with you for a reason." Brooke exclaimed happily as Haley shook her head.

"Okay fine, but we have to have talls!" Haley agreed.

"Fine" Brooke relented, a smile on her face as she thought how there lunch date was every Friday afternoon and it was already Wednesday. Tomorrow they would go shopping and try and get all the after Christmas sales so maybe she could talk the other two into stopping at Starbucks then. "How was Jamie this morning?" Brooke asked.

"He was good. He loved his toys he got in his stockings." Haley said smiling as she remembered seeing her sons face in pure happiness when he walked down the steps with his mom and saw all the presents Santa had left him. "Tonight we are going to let him sleep in his big boy bed we decided. With the new baby coming we don't want two kids in cribs and he's at the age where he can be sleeping in a toddler bed so it will be a big night for him. We told him this morning and he was ecstatic."

---

"So how are the hormones?" Lucas asked the other two men in the room as they turned on Mickey's Once Upon a Christmas. Leighton had chosen and wanted another Mickey Mouse movie because she wanted her cousin to like Mickey Mouse as much as she did.

"Haley, actually, isn't bad lately. I'm benefiting from most of them," Nathan said smirking his voice suggestive.

"She's like my little sister. That's disgusting" Derek told him before pointing to Lucas, "Don't you dare tell me anything about my sister's sex life. As far as I know Leighton was a one time thing and this new kid was the only other time."

Nathan and Lucas just looked at each other and started laughing. "Okay dude" Lucas said agreeing. "Has Brooke or Haley wanted pickles with chocolate syrup and vanilla ice cream?" Lucas asked.

"No but Brooke has been craving Doritos nacho cheese with caramel sauce and chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream." Derek told the other two. "That's her latest."

"Haley's is me" Nathan replied cockily.

"I am an ex-marine and I will kick your ass" Derek threatened all the men in the room knowing he wasn't serious.

Not wanting Nathan to push his luck, Lucas looked in the dining room and saw the three girls laughing and glowing as they sat at the table. "I can't believe I finally talked Peyton into marrying me," Lucas told the other guys remembering how when he first asked she had said no. Just because she was having his kid did not mean they had to get married. Although when she was 8 months pregnant he pushed his luck and asked her again although this time she had said yes. One month later they were married and that night Leighton made her debut into the world, thankfully once the duo had left the reception.

"Yea she should've picked Skills. Really she chose third best." Nathan said.

_**It's a secret no one tells;  
One day it's heaven, one day it's hell.  
It's no fairy tale;  
Take it from me,  
That's the way it's supposed to be.**_

"Who would've been the first?" Lucas asked curiously.

"Me of course" Nathan responded cockily. "But I have my own angel in the dining room, so she had to make do with you if she wanted to be Haley's sister.

Lucas glared at his brother before punching him in the shoulder.

"Guys do I have to act like the adult all the time? I thought retiring from the marines meant I didn't have to baby-sit grown men anymore" Derek said looking at the two Scott brothers pointedly.

Before either brother could respond the doorbell rang.

"Nathan get the door please," Haley yelled finally finding a comfortable position in the kitchen chair and not wanting to move and lose it.

Nathan got up off the couch and opened the door to see Skills and Allie standing there. Skills was holding Emma's carrier while Allie held onto their son Daniel's carrier. The twins were only 5 months and already spoiled by their parents and all their aunts and uncles.

"Come on in" Nathan said reaching for the infant seat out of Allie's hands and taking it to the living room before unfastening the belt and taking the baby out as Skills did the same with Emma. "Better get some time in with this little boy before the girls realize there are babies here" Nathan said as Skills passed the little girl into Lucas's outstretched hands.

"Hey Leighton" Allie said seeing the little girl lying on her stomach and kicking her legs in the air. "Hi Aunt Allie" Leighton responded turning her head and waving before going back to watching the TV.

"Hey Jamie" Allie said leaning down by the little boy and patted his back as he laid next to his cousin.

Jamie looked at her and gave a smile before his eyes gazed back to the TV.

"The girls are in the kitchen," Nathan told Allie as he made faces at the baby in his arms, and Lucas made funny sounds to try and get Emma smiling.

Since she knew the twins were in good hands and Skills would be in the room anyways, Allie left the boys talking as she walked into the kitchen and saw the girls sitting around the table talking.

"Hey guys" Allie said sitting down across from Brooke.

"Hey how were the twins this morning?" Peyton asked knowing that normally the twins were good in the mornings and they had their schedule they had to keep.

"Good" Allie said before asking how all three were dealing with their pregnancies. The girls continued to talk until it was time to open presents and then ate all the food Haley had made and what the other families had brought to the Scott household. The laughter and Christmas music played through the house until everyone left to tuck their kids in for the night.

---

After leaving Naley's house as Brooke had dubbed them so long ago she walked sleepily to the bedroom she shared with Derek and slipped on a nightgown before sliding into bed and watching Derek put on a pair of pajama bottoms before he slipped into bed with her and pulled her into him.

"So, did you have a good Christmas?" Derek asked her, his thumb brushing circles on her shoulder and she smiled happily up at him.

"Yes and I think Isabelle liked her first Christmas too." Brooke told him rubbing her belly before a tiny laugh escaped through her lips as Isabelle kicked inside her stomach. Derek moved his hand to where Brooke's was, and smiled down lovingly at her as their daughter kicked, the TV on with the sound turned low as Miracle on 34th street played in the background. Their tradition of watching the movie together after going to Haley's Christmas party continuing.

_**You will fly and you will crawl;  
God knows even angels fall.  
No such thing as you lost it all.  
God knows even angels fall.**_

"I love you" Derek told her before he bent his head and whispered the same words to their daughter. The tears in Brooke's eyes prickling as she felt her heart burst with joy. She never got sick of hearing those words and figured she never would.

"Me and Bella love you too" Brooke said before leaning up and kissing him. The two stayed in their own little world as they watched the movie and cuddled before falling asleep, excited for next Christmas when their little girl would be laying on the bed between them.

---

After changing into her pajama's Leighton hopped into her bed. Peyton coming to sit next to her on the bed and putting her arm around the little blonde stroking her head as Lucas sat on the other side of the bed, holding Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol."

Lucas made sure everyone was comfortable before he pulled out the bookmark and started reading. Picking up from where he had ended last night as he told Leighton about the third spirit, the ghost of Christmas yet to come showed Scrooge what would happen if he didn't change. Leighton listened to her father's voice her tiny blue eyes fighting to stay open as her mother stroked her hair and Lucas read, each knowing she would soon lose the fight against the sleep that desperately claimed her little body. Peyton smiled when she heard her daughter's breathing even out and locked eyes with Lucas as he put the bookmark back in the book and stood up putting the book back on the little girl's desk before going to Peyton's side and helping her out of bed. Lucas bent down and gently kissed the little girl's forehead before whispering, "I love you" and moving so Peyton could do the same. Peyton leaned down and did the same before pulling the little tinker bell bedspread up as Lucas walked to turn on the matching night-light. The two of them walked out of the room hand in hand, to their own bedroom before crawling into bed.

_**You laugh, you cry, no one knows why  
Behold the thrill of it all...  
You're on the ride  
You might as well  
Open your eyes**_

Too tired to even say anything, Peyton laid on the bed. Lucas pulled her into him, her back against his chest as his hand moved to their son, Peyton's meeting his there and covering it as they let the day's event unwind and the sleep they so desperately craved coming to them, each thinking they were lucky to have the other.

"I love you" Lucas whispered into the shell of her ear.

"I love you too" Peyton responded.

"True love always" Lucas told her before closing his eyes and pulling Peyton closer to him and falling asleep.

_I'm so glad I have him and Leighton and this little guy_ Peyton thought smiling before her eyes drooped closed and she fell asleep the magic of her world living on for another day.

---

After tucking Jamie into his big boy bed, Haley and Nathan moved to their bedroom. Haley changed into her green nightgown, her stomach stretching the fabric before laying in bed. Taking off his dress pants and shirt Nathan slid into bed beside her and Haley lifter her nightgown to rub cocoa butter on her stomach to try and minimize the stretch marks. Nathan watched as she rubbed the lotion in and smiled lovingly at her. He was glad that John had been in jail for 5 years now and Haley was no longer worried about him. He knew on the anniversary of Josh's death she would still go visit his grave and on the anniversary of the day in the school Haley and Nathan would take off and spend the day in the house watching movies and just remembering they had each other. Haley pulled her nightgown down before moving to put the lotion on the nightstand. Haley saw her husband in deep thought and smiled when she curled into his side and he automatically wrapped his arm around her.

"What are you thinking about?" Haley questioned curiously.

"How lucky I am to have you." Nathan responded honestly. He didn't know what it was about this woman but she was the only one who could make him mushy.

"Such a sweet talker" Haley said smiling and she patted Nathan's cheek.

"I try" Nathan teased.

"Soon you will have two girls to sweet talk," Haley said placing her hand on her stomach as she looked up to Nathan.

"Good thing I'm hot. That should help with one of the girls and the other girl I can just buy a pony," Nathan said smirking.

"Nathan Royal Scott you are not buying our daughter a pony without talking to me about it" Haley reprimanded as Nathan just looked at her before nodding his head.

"Okay but it will cost you" Nathan said his hand moving down to Haley's waist.

"Oh yea what's that?" Haley asked raising an eyebrow curiously.

"One kiss" Nathan said swooping down before she could even pretend to object.

"I love you Haley James." Nathan spoke honestly when he pulled back from the kiss to catch his breath.

"I love you too." Haley told him her thumb caressing his cheek.

"Always"

"And forever," Haley finished.

"I love you too angel," Nathan said placing a kiss on Haley's stomach.

_**You will fly and you will crawl;  
God knows even angels fall.  
No such thing as you lost it all.  
God knows even angels fall.  
Even angels fall  
Even angels fall**_

"She loves you too," Haley responded. "Just remember, even angels fall sometimes."


End file.
